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Hockey: News and Discussion Thread
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97BlackAckCL (08-27-2014)
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Yumcha (08-27-2014)
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That custody battle is still on-going, rumor has it that Domcha has a PFA order against Moogy which is why he doesn't come in this forum anymore
Senior Moderator
Just came by to say that Finlandia isn't quite as good at basketball as they are at hockey.
Trolling Canuckistan
Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!Maple Leafs Suck!!!
Trolling Canuckistan
Q: What do the Toronto Maple Leafs and the Titanic have in common? A: They both look good until they hit the ice!
Q: What’s the difference between Frequent Flyer Miles and the Toronto Maple Leafs? A: Frequent Flyer Miles earn points.
Q: Why do Maple Leafs fans drink from a saucer? A: Because the cup's always in Detroit!
Q: Why did the Maple Leafs enforcer retire early? A: He was ice fishing and got run over by the zamboni!
Q: Why don't the Maple Leafs drink tea? A: Because the Canadiens and Red Wings have all the cups.
Q: What do you call 5 Toronto Maple Leafs players standing ear to ear? A: A wind tunnel.
Q: Why are the Maple Leafs like grizzly bears? A: Every fall they go into hibernation.
Q: What does a recent high school dropout and the Toronto Maple Leafs have in common? A: They’re both young, have no goals and no good prospects.
Q: What’s the difference between a line of cocaine and a pair of Leaf tickets? A: People would pass up a pair of Leaf tickets.
Q: What’s the difference between a fat chick and the Toronto Maple Leafs? A: Even a fat chick scores every once in a while!
Q: Why do the Maple Leafs suck at geometry? A: Because they never have any points.
Q: What do college students and the Maple Leafs have in common? A: They’ve both finished their year.
Q: What do a fine wine and the Toronto Maple Leafs have in common? A: They both spend a lot of time in the cellar, cost too much and are only enjoyed on select occasions.
Q: Why is the Hockey Hall Of Fame in Toronto? A: It's the only way Leafs fans can get to see the Stanley Cup!
Q: Why did the Post Office recall their latest stamps? A: They had pictures of Maple Leafs players on them and people couldn't figure out which side to spit on.
Q: Why do people like driving a car with a Maple Leafs fan? A: Because you can park in the handicap zone!
Q: What do you get when you combine all 23 Toronto Maple Leafs with 23 lesbians? A: Fourty-Six people that dont do dick!
Q: What is the difference between a Toronto Maple Leafs fan and a pot hole? A: I would swerve to avoid the pot hole!
Q: What song do Toronto Maple Leafs fans sing before the end of the third period? A: Nobody knows. There's never any of them left.
Q: Whats the difference between the Toronto Maple Leafs and a mosquito? A: A mosquito stops sucking.
Q: Why did the little boy take his hockey stick up into a tree? A: He wanted to play with the Maple Leafs.
Q: What do the Toronto Maple Leafs and possums have in common? A: Both play dead at home and get killed on the road!
Q: What is the difference between a Maple Leafs fan and a baby? A: The baby will stop whining after awhile.
Q: Did you hear the Toronto Maple Leafs are moving to the Phillipines? A: They are going to be called the Manilla Folders!
Q: What do I have in common with the Toronto Maple Leafs? A: Next week, we'll both be watching the Stanley Cup Finals on television.
Q: What do Toronto Maple Leafs fans and sperm have in common? A: One in 3,000,000 has a chance of becoming a human being.
Q: How many Toronto Maple Leafs does it take to change a tire? A: One, unless it's a blowout, in which case they all show up
Q: What do you call 23 millionaires around a TV watching the Stanley Cup Finals? A: The Toronto Maple Leafs.
Q: How can you tell if a Maple Leafs fan just sent you a fax? A: There's a stamp on it!
Q: What do the Toronto Maple Leafs and Billy Graham have in common? A: They both can make 15,000 people stand up and yell "Jesus Christ".
Q: What is the difference between a bucket of shit and an Toronto Maple Leafs fan? A: The bucket.
Q: If you have a car containing a Maple Leafs forward, a Maple Leafs center, and a Maple Leafs defender, who is driving the car? A: The cop.
Q: How do you casterate an Toronto Maple Leafs fan? A: Kick his sister in the mouth
Q: What should you do if you find three Toronto Maple Leafs hockey fans buried up to their neck in cement? A: Get more cement.
Q: What's the difference between an Toronto Maple Leafs fan and a carp? A: One is a bottom-feeding, scum sucker, and the other is a fish.
Q. How did the Toronto Maple Leafs fan die from drinking milk? A. The cow fell on him!
Q: What does an Toronto Maple Leafs fan do when his team has won the Stanley Cup? A: He turns off the PlayStation 3.
Q: How many Toronto Maple Leafs fans does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None. Lava lamps don’t burn out man!
Q: What does a Toronto Maple Leafs fan and a bottle of beer have in common? A: They’re both empty from the neck up.
Q: Why do Toronto Maple Leafs fans keep their season tickets on their dashboards? A: So they can park in handicap spaces.
Q: How do the Maple Leafs spend the first week of training camp? A: Studying the Miranda Rights
Q: How do you keep a Maple Leafs fan from masterbating? A: You paint his dick Flyers orange and black and he won't beat it for 4 years!
Q. Why do ducks fly over Air Canada Centre upside down? A. There's nothing worth craping on!
Q: Why doesn't Windsor have a professional hockey team? A: Because then Toronto would want one.
Q: Did you hear that Toronto's hockey team doesn't have a website? A: They can't string three "Ws" together.
Q: What's the difference between a Air Canada Centre hotdog, and a Wells Fargo Center hotdog? A: You can buy a Wells Fargo Center hotdog in May!
Q: Why did BP hire the Toronto Maple Leafs to clean up the Gulf oil spill? A: Because they'll go out there and throw in the towel!
Q: What's the difference between a dead dog in the road and a dead Toronto Maple Leafs fan in the road? A: There are skid marks in front of the dog
Q: What is a Toronto Maple Leafs fan's favorite whine? A: "We can't beat Philadelphia."
Q: How do you stop an Toronto Maple Leafs fan from beating his wife? A: Dress her in Philadelphia Orange and Black!
Q: What’s the difference between the Air Canada Centre and a red light district? A: In a red light district, you pay $300 bucks and somebody scores.
Q: What’s the difference between the Toronto Raptors and the Toronto Maple Leafs? A: The Raptors shoot at a net.
Q: Why are the Toronto Maple Leafs like Canada Post? A: They both wear uniforms and don't deliver!
A girl named Mary has not gone along with the crowd. The teacher asks her why she has decided to be different. "Because I'm not a Maple Leafs fan." "Then," asks the teacher, "what are you?" "Why I'm proud to be a Philadelphia Flyers fan.", boasts the little girl. The teacher is a little perturbed now, her face slightly red. She asks Mary why she is a Flyers fan. "Well, My Dad and Mom are Flyers fans, and I'm a Flyers fan, too!" The teacher is now angry. "That's no reason," she says loudly. "What if your mom was a moron, and your dad was a moron, What would you be then?" A pause, and a smile. "Then," says Mary, "I'd be a Maple Leafs fan."
"A skunk walk's into a bar and sees 3 guys in the corner wearing Maple Leaf jerseys. He turns to the bartender and says "Ya'll think I stink."
Q: What’s the difference between Frequent Flyer Miles and the Toronto Maple Leafs? A: Frequent Flyer Miles earn points.
Q: Why do Maple Leafs fans drink from a saucer? A: Because the cup's always in Detroit!
Q: Why did the Maple Leafs enforcer retire early? A: He was ice fishing and got run over by the zamboni!
Q: Why don't the Maple Leafs drink tea? A: Because the Canadiens and Red Wings have all the cups.
Q: What do you call 5 Toronto Maple Leafs players standing ear to ear? A: A wind tunnel.
Q: Why are the Maple Leafs like grizzly bears? A: Every fall they go into hibernation.
Q: What does a recent high school dropout and the Toronto Maple Leafs have in common? A: They’re both young, have no goals and no good prospects.
Q: What’s the difference between a line of cocaine and a pair of Leaf tickets? A: People would pass up a pair of Leaf tickets.
Q: What’s the difference between a fat chick and the Toronto Maple Leafs? A: Even a fat chick scores every once in a while!
Q: Why do the Maple Leafs suck at geometry? A: Because they never have any points.
Q: What do college students and the Maple Leafs have in common? A: They’ve both finished their year.
Q: What do a fine wine and the Toronto Maple Leafs have in common? A: They both spend a lot of time in the cellar, cost too much and are only enjoyed on select occasions.
Q: Why is the Hockey Hall Of Fame in Toronto? A: It's the only way Leafs fans can get to see the Stanley Cup!
Q: Why did the Post Office recall their latest stamps? A: They had pictures of Maple Leafs players on them and people couldn't figure out which side to spit on.
Q: Why do people like driving a car with a Maple Leafs fan? A: Because you can park in the handicap zone!
Q: What do you get when you combine all 23 Toronto Maple Leafs with 23 lesbians? A: Fourty-Six people that dont do dick!
Q: What is the difference between a Toronto Maple Leafs fan and a pot hole? A: I would swerve to avoid the pot hole!
Q: What song do Toronto Maple Leafs fans sing before the end of the third period? A: Nobody knows. There's never any of them left.
Q: Whats the difference between the Toronto Maple Leafs and a mosquito? A: A mosquito stops sucking.
Q: Why did the little boy take his hockey stick up into a tree? A: He wanted to play with the Maple Leafs.
Q: What do the Toronto Maple Leafs and possums have in common? A: Both play dead at home and get killed on the road!
Q: What is the difference between a Maple Leafs fan and a baby? A: The baby will stop whining after awhile.
Q: Did you hear the Toronto Maple Leafs are moving to the Phillipines? A: They are going to be called the Manilla Folders!
Q: What do I have in common with the Toronto Maple Leafs? A: Next week, we'll both be watching the Stanley Cup Finals on television.
Q: What do Toronto Maple Leafs fans and sperm have in common? A: One in 3,000,000 has a chance of becoming a human being.
Q: How many Toronto Maple Leafs does it take to change a tire? A: One, unless it's a blowout, in which case they all show up
Q: What do you call 23 millionaires around a TV watching the Stanley Cup Finals? A: The Toronto Maple Leafs.
Q: How can you tell if a Maple Leafs fan just sent you a fax? A: There's a stamp on it!
Q: What do the Toronto Maple Leafs and Billy Graham have in common? A: They both can make 15,000 people stand up and yell "Jesus Christ".
Q: What is the difference between a bucket of shit and an Toronto Maple Leafs fan? A: The bucket.
Q: If you have a car containing a Maple Leafs forward, a Maple Leafs center, and a Maple Leafs defender, who is driving the car? A: The cop.
Q: How do you casterate an Toronto Maple Leafs fan? A: Kick his sister in the mouth
Q: What should you do if you find three Toronto Maple Leafs hockey fans buried up to their neck in cement? A: Get more cement.
Q: What's the difference between an Toronto Maple Leafs fan and a carp? A: One is a bottom-feeding, scum sucker, and the other is a fish.
Q. How did the Toronto Maple Leafs fan die from drinking milk? A. The cow fell on him!
Q: What does an Toronto Maple Leafs fan do when his team has won the Stanley Cup? A: He turns off the PlayStation 3.
Q: How many Toronto Maple Leafs fans does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None. Lava lamps don’t burn out man!
Q: What does a Toronto Maple Leafs fan and a bottle of beer have in common? A: They’re both empty from the neck up.
Q: Why do Toronto Maple Leafs fans keep their season tickets on their dashboards? A: So they can park in handicap spaces.
Q: How do the Maple Leafs spend the first week of training camp? A: Studying the Miranda Rights
Q: How do you keep a Maple Leafs fan from masterbating? A: You paint his dick Flyers orange and black and he won't beat it for 4 years!
Q. Why do ducks fly over Air Canada Centre upside down? A. There's nothing worth craping on!
Q: Why doesn't Windsor have a professional hockey team? A: Because then Toronto would want one.
Q: Did you hear that Toronto's hockey team doesn't have a website? A: They can't string three "Ws" together.
Q: What's the difference between a Air Canada Centre hotdog, and a Wells Fargo Center hotdog? A: You can buy a Wells Fargo Center hotdog in May!
Q: Why did BP hire the Toronto Maple Leafs to clean up the Gulf oil spill? A: Because they'll go out there and throw in the towel!
Q: What's the difference between a dead dog in the road and a dead Toronto Maple Leafs fan in the road? A: There are skid marks in front of the dog
Q: What is a Toronto Maple Leafs fan's favorite whine? A: "We can't beat Philadelphia."
Q: How do you stop an Toronto Maple Leafs fan from beating his wife? A: Dress her in Philadelphia Orange and Black!
Q: What’s the difference between the Air Canada Centre and a red light district? A: In a red light district, you pay $300 bucks and somebody scores.
Q: What’s the difference between the Toronto Raptors and the Toronto Maple Leafs? A: The Raptors shoot at a net.
Q: Why are the Toronto Maple Leafs like Canada Post? A: They both wear uniforms and don't deliver!
A girl named Mary has not gone along with the crowd. The teacher asks her why she has decided to be different. "Because I'm not a Maple Leafs fan." "Then," asks the teacher, "what are you?" "Why I'm proud to be a Philadelphia Flyers fan.", boasts the little girl. The teacher is a little perturbed now, her face slightly red. She asks Mary why she is a Flyers fan. "Well, My Dad and Mom are Flyers fans, and I'm a Flyers fan, too!" The teacher is now angry. "That's no reason," she says loudly. "What if your mom was a moron, and your dad was a moron, What would you be then?" A pause, and a smile. "Then," says Mary, "I'd be a Maple Leafs fan."
"A skunk walk's into a bar and sees 3 guys in the corner wearing Maple Leaf jerseys. He turns to the bartender and says "Ya'll think I stink."
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No calendars in Finlandia?
Senior Moderator
But those are some gems.
Trolling Canuckistan
Trolling Canuckistan
Breaking News!!!!!!!
Toronto Maple Leafs have hired a new coach from South Korea.
www.domchadomchadomcha.com
Originally Posted by Shanahan
I'm happy to announce that we have hired famed South Korean national coach Win Sum Soon to take over as the head coach of the Toronto maple leafs.
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97BlackAckCL (09-02-2014),
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Trolling Canuckistan
Three Maple Leafs fans were bemoaning the fact that their team kept losing and might miss the playoffs.
"I blame the manager" said the first, "if he would sign new players then we could have a great team".
"I blame the players" said the second, "if they made more effort I am sure we would score more goals".
"I blame my parents", added the third, " if I'd been born in another city I'd be supporting a decent team!"
"I blame the manager" said the first, "if he would sign new players then we could have a great team".
"I blame the players" said the second, "if they made more effort I am sure we would score more goals".
"I blame my parents", added the third, " if I'd been born in another city I'd be supporting a decent team!"
Trolling Canuckistan
Q: What do a criminal court judge and the coach of the Maple Leafs have in common?
A: They both sit behind a bench, watch an endless parade of losers go by, and wonder if they are actually making a difference.
Q: What do the Leafs team and a pace car have in common?
A: They both go around in circles, aren't involved in the race and are passed by all the competitors.
A: They both sit behind a bench, watch an endless parade of losers go by, and wonder if they are actually making a difference.
Q: What do the Leafs team and a pace car have in common?
A: They both go around in circles, aren't involved in the race and are passed by all the competitors.
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97BlackAckCL (09-02-2014)
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South Korean national coach Win Sum Soon
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In less than 3 weeks, I'll be at a hockey game :gheywave:
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Too bad black label won't be around to talk hockey with us.
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97BlackAckCL (09-03-2014)
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@ Win Sum Soon...
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Shadup Twiggy.
Trolling Canuckistan
Trolling Canuckistan
Trolling Canuckistan
What do you call a Toronto Maple Leaf with a Stanley Cup ring? A thief.
What’s the difference between the Toronto Maple Leafs and a triangle? A triangle has 3 points.
What does Mike Komisarek and Timmins, Ontario have in common? They are both Minus 25 come christmas.
Two guys are camping out in the Muskokas, sitting around a fire at night and relaxing. Suddenly one of them sits bolt upright and shouts “DAMMIT! The Leafs lost!” His friend, impressed with his friends psychic ability asked “How do you know?” His friend replied, “It’s after 10:00 pm.”
As a non-Leafs fan, I’ve always admired that slogan MLSE came up with…”The Passion That Unites Us All”. You have to give them credit, that’s a pretty clever way of saying “Misery Loves Company”.
Three men show up at the pearly gates to be interviewed by St. Peter. The 1st one tells Peter that his IQ is 155. Peter sends him to help out Einstein. 2nd guy’s IQ is 152. He’s sent to work on a project with Copernicus. 3rd guy says his IQ is 75. St. Peter says “How bout them Leafs eh”.
How are a box of Tampons and the Leafs alike? They’re only good for one period.
The other day was take your child to work day. The Leafs had a fun time, played a little scrimmage against their sons and daughters. Unfortunately they lost, 5-3.
One morning in elementary school, the students were going to a geography class. The teacher wanted to show the students where cities and states are. The teacher asks the class, “Does anyone know where Pittsburgh is?” Billy raises up his hand and says, “Yeah, Pennsylvania!”. The teacher replies, “Very good, Billy!, now can anyone tell me were Detroit is?” Suzy raises her hand and says, “That’s in Michigan!” The teacher again says, “Very good.” Trying to confuse the children, she now asks, “Where’s Toronto?” Tommy raises his hand and says, “Oh Oh Pick me!!!, I know?” The teacher says, “OK, Tommy where is Toronto?” “Last place.”
What’s the difference between the Toronto Maple Leafs and a triangle? A triangle has 3 points.
What does Mike Komisarek and Timmins, Ontario have in common? They are both Minus 25 come christmas.
Two guys are camping out in the Muskokas, sitting around a fire at night and relaxing. Suddenly one of them sits bolt upright and shouts “DAMMIT! The Leafs lost!” His friend, impressed with his friends psychic ability asked “How do you know?” His friend replied, “It’s after 10:00 pm.”
As a non-Leafs fan, I’ve always admired that slogan MLSE came up with…”The Passion That Unites Us All”. You have to give them credit, that’s a pretty clever way of saying “Misery Loves Company”.
Three men show up at the pearly gates to be interviewed by St. Peter. The 1st one tells Peter that his IQ is 155. Peter sends him to help out Einstein. 2nd guy’s IQ is 152. He’s sent to work on a project with Copernicus. 3rd guy says his IQ is 75. St. Peter says “How bout them Leafs eh”.
How are a box of Tampons and the Leafs alike? They’re only good for one period.
The other day was take your child to work day. The Leafs had a fun time, played a little scrimmage against their sons and daughters. Unfortunately they lost, 5-3.
One morning in elementary school, the students were going to a geography class. The teacher wanted to show the students where cities and states are. The teacher asks the class, “Does anyone know where Pittsburgh is?” Billy raises up his hand and says, “Yeah, Pennsylvania!”. The teacher replies, “Very good, Billy!, now can anyone tell me were Detroit is?” Suzy raises her hand and says, “That’s in Michigan!” The teacher again says, “Very good.” Trying to confuse the children, she now asks, “Where’s Toronto?” Tommy raises his hand and says, “Oh Oh Pick me!!!, I know?” The teacher says, “OK, Tommy where is Toronto?” “Last place.”
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97BlackAckCL (09-03-2014)
Trolling Canuckistan
But wait... there's more!
What does Toronto have that LA, Detroit, Chicago, NYR, Pittsburgh and Boston don't? Black and white photos of their last Stanley Cup.
How can you tell if a Toronto Maple Leafs hockey player has been using the computer? There's white-out on the screen.
How can you tell if another Toronto Maple Leafs hockey player been using the computer? There's writing on the white-out.
Why are the Leafs owned by teachers? Because they both take summers off and are demoralized the rest of the year.
How can you tell if a Toronto Maple Leafs hockey player has been using the computer? There's white-out on the screen.
How can you tell if another Toronto Maple Leafs hockey player been using the computer? There's writing on the white-out.
Why are the Leafs owned by teachers? Because they both take summers off and are demoralized the rest of the year.
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97BlackAckCL (09-03-2014)
Senior Moderator
black label, what have you done.
Trolling Canuckistan
Trolling Canuckistan
The Toronto Maple Leafs announced today that the entire contents of their trophy case has been stolen. Police are on the lookout for a man carrying a blue and white carpet.
Trolling Canuckistan
What do a mountain overpass and the Leafs have in common? For the first one you're not allowed to pass and the second it just ends up that way
Trolling Canuckistan
Whats the difference between eating 5 gallons of chocolate ice cream and buying a leaf ticket? You feel bad about buying the leaf ticket.
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97BlackAckCL (09-03-2014)
Trolling Canuckistan
Seriously, this is the most fun I've had on Azine since I was crippled with a shattered femur and high as a kite on pain killers
thanks domcha...thanx TML!!!
All HAIL FINLANDIA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
thanks domcha...thanx TML!!!
All HAIL FINLANDIA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Last edited by black label; 09-03-2014 at 12:42 AM. Reason: YO MUTHAFUCKAS (dramatic pause) page 1160... (thumps chest twice)... that's my muthafuckin' page (drops mic, awaits the dom)
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