wife issues
#42
Whats with it with bi-polar girls being lazy? My last gf was Bi polar and I never did so much yelling in my life! We only dated 8 months and then I got tired off all the mood swings.
Sorry to hear about your problems and it really sucks you have a daughter with her. Good thing your daughter is still young though. Sounds like the fire is dying down and you have no more wood to refuel it. If you are going to stay with your wife, id talk to someone about protecting your dad's money.
Sorry to hear about your problems and it really sucks you have a daughter with her. Good thing your daughter is still young though. Sounds like the fire is dying down and you have no more wood to refuel it. If you are going to stay with your wife, id talk to someone about protecting your dad's money.
#43
Originally Posted by The Sarlacc
Let me add one little suggestion...yelling because the dishwasher didnt get emptied is stupid...Using your "training" to chew her out is stupid.
Your family is your family, and work is work. seperate the two.
Two, try a little yes yelling...really frustrating, sure. Want to yell, sure. But how abou tinstead saying "OK, well I am here now to watch Sierra, could you please do the dishes?"
I know she isn't on her meds, and sounds lazy as hell...but you losing your cool doesn't help anything.
Your family is your family, and work is work. seperate the two.
Two, try a little yes yelling...really frustrating, sure. Want to yell, sure. But how abou tinstead saying "OK, well I am here now to watch Sierra, could you please do the dishes?"
I know she isn't on her meds, and sounds lazy as hell...but you losing your cool doesn't help anything.
Yelling at your woman doesn't do anything except make both of you more upset. If you love her and you really want to make the relationship work especially since you have a child together, focus on ways to mend the problem.
Talk to her - explain what's bothering you and express your wish for her to help you more with the household chores. Perhaps it's time to go into marriage counseling and for her to take medicines again.
#44
Originally Posted by Water-S
i honestly don't think either one of us wants a divorce. Her mom is nuts. her family nuts. I listed what her family like in a post above. Her mom always has to be in our business. like by not letting me talk to her. I've told Amy to talk to her. she claim she has. It does no good. I've tried to talk to her it does no good. she claim it's cause she cares about her daughter. but she's SOOOOOO good at giving advice why did she get a divorce.
her family a bunch of hillbillies. for example her mom wants me to stay at their house for 6-7 hours for christmas or thanksgiving and I only want to stay 2-3 hours she bitched at me.
keep in mind I spent 1/2 tank of gas going to and coming home to her house.
I want to move out of the state so I can get her away from her damn mom and family but I just got a job I liked and plus her mom would have a fit about that.
Her mom pump her full of all this shit that i'm a useless sack of crap. and why are you still with him. blah blah. her mom says she loves me but I don't believe a damn word she says.
She acts like she's grandma of the year. because she gets shit for Sierra at Wal-Mart she's like yeah that shirt for Sierra cost 10 bucks. I almost said "whoop-de-doo" ma'am you make 10 bucks an hour answer phones in a call center.My sister who a pharmist dresses her daughter in Gucci and Baby gap shit. I make a hell of lot more money than you do and you're 50.
her family a bunch of hillbillies. for example her mom wants me to stay at their house for 6-7 hours for christmas or thanksgiving and I only want to stay 2-3 hours she bitched at me.
keep in mind I spent 1/2 tank of gas going to and coming home to her house.
I want to move out of the state so I can get her away from her damn mom and family but I just got a job I liked and plus her mom would have a fit about that.
Her mom pump her full of all this shit that i'm a useless sack of crap. and why are you still with him. blah blah. her mom says she loves me but I don't believe a damn word she says.
She acts like she's grandma of the year. because she gets shit for Sierra at Wal-Mart she's like yeah that shirt for Sierra cost 10 bucks. I almost said "whoop-de-doo" ma'am you make 10 bucks an hour answer phones in a call center.My sister who a pharmist dresses her daughter in Gucci and Baby gap shit. I make a hell of lot more money than you do and you're 50.
You knew the family is nut, but you still stick your head into it. It sounded like you want drama in your life. It's in the gene; once mom got it, the whole family has it. I am sorry but you are almost at Divorce Avenue, if you and your wife can not find the middle groud.
#45
Wow, this sounds unfortunate. I second other's notions of gathering documentation against her should you decide to go that route but at the same time try to mend things and calm yourself down (I know it's almost impossible sometimes).
Also, work on protecting your dad's assets too, that would be a bummer if you got all that then you and your wife split up and she gets half. Have him leave it to your sister if you trust that she'll split it with you later.
Also, work on protecting your dad's assets too, that would be a bummer if you got all that then you and your wife split up and she gets half. Have him leave it to your sister if you trust that she'll split it with you later.
#46
Well, I'm not going to read all of this but my response to the initial post is don't get pissed just because she didn't do it. Don't do it yourself though. You asked her to do it so let her. Even if the dishes pile up, let her take care of it. Eventually she'll get sick of looking at it and do it. It's not worth getting pissed over. Like the duck man in the first or second post, I too dated a chick that was bipolar. Also hence the DATED not DATE.
#47
Originally Posted by sasha
Yelling at your woman doesn't do anything except make both of you more upset. If you love her and you really want to make the relationship work especially since you have a child together, focus on ways to mend the problem.
Talk to her - explain what's bothering you and express your wish for her to help you more with the household chores. Perhaps it's time to go into marriage counseling and for her to take medicines again.
I have to disagree with the sentiment here. Has anyone here ever successfully argued or reasoned with a bipolar person who wouldn't take their medicines? Serious question. It's about the same as arguing with a five year old. I'm really not trying to be rude, but this ain't gonna work long term. It sounds like those who are saying "work on it" are actually saying suck it up. I don't think you should have to compromise your happiness just for the sake of staying together and that's what it sounds like everyone is telling you to do. Or, that's the impression I'm getting from your posts of what you feel like you're having to do.
In regards to marriage counseling, that only works when both people want to do something about it. From her not taking her medicines, I return to my reasoning with a five year old comment again - it cannot work when only one person is putting in the effort. There is no way to mend this problem for Water - his wife has to do it and I don't think she can or will.
Bipolar people tend to like the hypomanic states because they are super productive/efficient - until they crash. I'm not sure but I'd imagine that fact and the side effects of Lithium et al make very few stay on their regimen. Disclaimer - I am not a shrink.
I still think you're dragging out the inevitable. I can see only 3 ways out of this.
1) She shapes up, takes her meds, and I'm completely wrong - in that case all I can say is congratulations.
2) You get fed up with taking care of everything and you split - thus costing you half of everything and only weekends with your daughter - this is the worst possible situation as it puts your daughter in with a bipolar mother off her meds and your crazy mother in law too.
3) You play defense (legally) and try to keep custody of your child.
My priority would be to protect your daughter at all costs - you can make more money, but she is irreplaceable.
I apologize for being all doom and gloom, but I've seen what unmedicated bipolar disease does to families - it is not something you want to be a part of and in my admittedly limited experience does not change with time or with horrible events that result from the disease. Good luck regardless of what you choose to do. I hope it works out for you and your daughter.
#49
Originally Posted by 1killercls
The longer this thread gets the more I want to see pics of Water and the wife.
Call me crazy, but my guess is that would be the "Punch Line" to this thread.
Call me crazy, but my guess is that would be the "Punch Line" to this thread.
#53
Thread Starter
go like hell
Joined: Jul 2001
Posts: 5,154
Likes: 1
From: Anna,OH(home of the honda/acura motors)
Originally Posted by M TYPE X
Sounds like the two families couldn't be farther apart. You've got a great dad.
Yeah, so let's see those pics of those 'hot sluts' country HS girls. :perv:
Yeah, so let's see those pics of those 'hot sluts' country HS girls. :perv:
#54
Thread Starter
go like hell
Joined: Jul 2001
Posts: 5,154
Likes: 1
From: Anna,OH(home of the honda/acura motors)
update for Tues: She's living down at her mom's. She's suppose to call later and tell me what exactly going on. She left me a note while I was at work in the house claiming she changed her address to her mom's address.(ouch) She took the keys(to my Accord,Odyssey and house) off her keyring and put the table. Before I was saving and paying on her student loans from her undergrad to become a teacher which I didn't mind doing because she wasn't "going nuts" now she "nuts." I'm going to say "hey it's your issue." it's about 25-30 grand I think. I got a 00 Odyseey I think I'm gonna give myself a treat. I bought that Odyseey from my parents when they bought their 05(new body style). well I think I'm gonna sell the 00 and buy their 05.
#56
Originally Posted by sasha
Are you giving up now? Why did she suddenly decide to live with her mom?
You guys need to talk. If you don't settle things with her now, she might deprive you of your daughter.
You guys need to talk. If you don't settle things with her now, she might deprive you of your daughter.
Not if he hires a good lawyer....
#57
Originally Posted by Water-S
I wouldn't hit or slap her around.(I don't hit women). I might chew her ass and make her like an idiot.
-The sad part about this Is in college because I graduated in business administration(fancy way of saying Business Management) the college in displinary and supervision class taugh us how to taught us how to chew an employee's butt but not be not hit or anything like assult.
-The sad part about this Is in college because I graduated in business administration(fancy way of saying Business Management) the college in displinary and supervision class taugh us how to taught us how to chew an employee's butt but not be not hit or anything like assult.
#58
i just read the first post and last page. So she has left you because you yelled at her for not taking the dishes out of the dishwasher? Cut your losses and run for the hills. I feel bad for your child.
#59
If this is really going down like this I wouldnt be thinking about buying you rparents 05...I would be thinking about you are going to secure custody of your daughter, which it sounds like you have not done shit to do.
You are all forked in the head.
You are all forked in the head.
#61
You know I wonder sometimes what is wrong with the world.....
Everybody has to be on meds...
When I was little and you would run around and not listen to adults..you were hyper...now you just have ADD and have to be on meds....
If you have mood swings...we used to say you were PMSing or just a moody ass....now you are bi-polar....and have to be on meds
Hmmm....how about people just suck it up and get off the meds....meds fuck you up and create a false dependency....drugs cant help you mentally....only you can help yourself with support from others.
FYI, Water-S grow the fuck up...if you are having trouble with your wife....well, that's your fault isn't it??? You knew she was bi-polar...you knew her family was an extension of her....and yet you married her and had a baby....time to make some decisions.
You are the BIG MAN in town....so file a divorce while you can...before you are worth something...sue for custody of your child on the grounds that your wife is mentally unfit to take care of her. If she is on meds....she shouldnt be taking care of a baby. Let her take the steps necessary to be a better person...
FYI, you have officially been nominated to be part of the Loser Games.
This nomination can be withdrawn when you make a firm decision on what to do in this situation.
Everybody has to be on meds...
When I was little and you would run around and not listen to adults..you were hyper...now you just have ADD and have to be on meds....
If you have mood swings...we used to say you were PMSing or just a moody ass....now you are bi-polar....and have to be on meds
Hmmm....how about people just suck it up and get off the meds....meds fuck you up and create a false dependency....drugs cant help you mentally....only you can help yourself with support from others.
FYI, Water-S grow the fuck up...if you are having trouble with your wife....well, that's your fault isn't it??? You knew she was bi-polar...you knew her family was an extension of her....and yet you married her and had a baby....time to make some decisions.
You are the BIG MAN in town....so file a divorce while you can...before you are worth something...sue for custody of your child on the grounds that your wife is mentally unfit to take care of her. If she is on meds....she shouldnt be taking care of a baby. Let her take the steps necessary to be a better person...
FYI, you have officially been nominated to be part of the Loser Games.
This nomination can be withdrawn when you make a firm decision on what to do in this situation.
#63
Oh, and put some distance between yourself and her. If it means losing full contact with the kid, well then, you should probably still go for it. I mean, the kid is half her genes, right? And the other half... well... There's plenty of potential for her to grow up with mom's insanity and dad's spelling/grammar.
#64
Originally Posted by moomaster_99
You know I wonder sometimes what is wrong with the world.....
Everybody has to be on meds...
When I was little and you would run around and not listen to adults..you were hyper...now you just have ADD and have to be on meds....
If you have mood swings...we used to say you were PMSing or just a moody ass....now you are bi-polar....and have to be on meds
Hmmm....how about people just suck it up and get off the meds....meds fuck you up and create a false dependency....drugs cant help you mentally....only you can help yourself with support from others.
FYI, Water-S grow the fuck up...if you are having trouble with your wife....well, that's your fault isn't it??? You knew she was bi-polar...you knew her family was an extension of her....and yet you married her and had a baby....time to make some decisions.
You are the BIG MAN in town....so file a divorce while you can...before you are worth something...sue for custody of your child on the grounds that your wife is mentally unfit to take care of her. If she is on meds....she shouldnt be taking care of a baby. Let her take the steps necessary to be a better person...
FYI, you have officially been nominated to be part of the Loser Games.
This nomination can be withdrawn when you make a firm decision on what to do in this situation.
Everybody has to be on meds...
When I was little and you would run around and not listen to adults..you were hyper...now you just have ADD and have to be on meds....
If you have mood swings...we used to say you were PMSing or just a moody ass....now you are bi-polar....and have to be on meds
Hmmm....how about people just suck it up and get off the meds....meds fuck you up and create a false dependency....drugs cant help you mentally....only you can help yourself with support from others.
FYI, Water-S grow the fuck up...if you are having trouble with your wife....well, that's your fault isn't it??? You knew she was bi-polar...you knew her family was an extension of her....and yet you married her and had a baby....time to make some decisions.
You are the BIG MAN in town....so file a divorce while you can...before you are worth something...sue for custody of your child on the grounds that your wife is mentally unfit to take care of her. If she is on meds....she shouldnt be taking care of a baby. Let her take the steps necessary to be a better person...
FYI, you have officially been nominated to be part of the Loser Games.
This nomination can be withdrawn when you make a firm decision on what to do in this situation.
#66
Originally Posted by Mike97 3.0P
I agree with most of this, except the part about the meds. Being around several people that have had some form of mental illness, I think i'm qualified to say you can't just 'suck it up and get off the meds.' Mental illness is not any less real than diabetes...you wouldn't tell someone to stop their insulin treatments and suck it up would you?
A physical ailment is a physical ailment...if your body needs insulin...you need it...ppl with high blood pressure can help themselves without being on the meds...its about wanting it....im sure there are ppl so far gone that they do need the meds...but there are a lot of lazy ppl out there too....
<---lazy, but i didnt take the meds....just cut back on things...try to be a lil healthier.
#67
Thread Starter
go like hell
Joined: Jul 2001
Posts: 5,154
Likes: 1
From: Anna,OH(home of the honda/acura motors)
I just got off the phone with her (first time I've talked with her in about 3 days). she said she's gonna live down at her mom's for awhile. which I'm cool with. She loves me more than anything. She has somethings she wants to work on and find herself. and I have something I want to work on. we'll share Sierra(she'll have her 1 week and I'll have her 1 week). I told her upfront look if I make a "major purchase" while you're gone you can't raise hell. she said "fine."
Now about the 2 vans. I got to thinking new van more insurance. I hate insurance companies. my dad and I are real close. he's a firefighter, I'm a firefigher. He farms, I help on the farm. we're very similar. he's been wanting to get trade in the little tractor(JD 2010) we use it as a loader tractor and to move small shit around the farm. also when people want their gardens plowed we got a 3 bottom plow for it. So since he's done so much for me. I'm probably gonna go to Creeger's Implement and price a new JD 4120 4 wheel drive loaded out for him and trade the 2010 in for him. his insurance on the farm covers any amount ot tractors or machinery.
I was Specing it out online and by the time i put 3 SCV remotes on it to the rear and 4x4 and a loader you're talking 28-29 grand.
Now about the 2 vans. I got to thinking new van more insurance. I hate insurance companies. my dad and I are real close. he's a firefighter, I'm a firefigher. He farms, I help on the farm. we're very similar. he's been wanting to get trade in the little tractor(JD 2010) we use it as a loader tractor and to move small shit around the farm. also when people want their gardens plowed we got a 3 bottom plow for it. So since he's done so much for me. I'm probably gonna go to Creeger's Implement and price a new JD 4120 4 wheel drive loaded out for him and trade the 2010 in for him. his insurance on the farm covers any amount ot tractors or machinery.
I was Specing it out online and by the time i put 3 SCV remotes on it to the rear and 4x4 and a loader you're talking 28-29 grand.
#69
Tractors are better than women!
Hell, cows are better than women.
... by the transitive property of the Nature of West Bumfuck, Ohio,
an entire farm is better than an entire high school of "hot sluts"
/Buckeyelogic
Hell, cows are better than women.
... by the transitive property of the Nature of West Bumfuck, Ohio,
an entire farm is better than an entire high school of "hot sluts"
/Buckeyelogic
#70
Originally Posted by M TYPE X
Tractors are better than women!
Hell, cows are better than women.
... by the transitive property of the Nature of West Bumfuck, Ohio,
an entire farm is better than an entire high school of "hot sluts"
/Buckeyelogic
Hell, cows are better than women.
... by the transitive property of the Nature of West Bumfuck, Ohio,
an entire farm is better than an entire high school of "hot sluts"
/Buckeyelogic
They must have gang raped you in Ohio with all the hate you have for them...
#72
Originally Posted by Water-S
I just got off the phone with her (first time I've talked with her in about 3 days). she said she's gonna live down at her mom's for awhile. which I'm cool with. She loves me more than anything. She has somethings she wants to work on and find herself. and I have something I want to work on. we'll share Sierra(she'll have her 1 week and I'll have her 1 week). I told her upfront look if I make a "major purchase" while you're gone you can't raise hell. she said "fine."
#73
What am I missing? The wife doesn't empty a dishwasher and now the marriage is on the verge of a breakup??? Bi-Polar or not, something doesn't add up.
There MUST have been issues before this, no???
There MUST have been issues before this, no???
#74
Senior Moderator
iTrader: (2)
Joined: May 2000
Posts: 27,921
Likes: 1,080
From: where the weather suits my clothes
Originally Posted by Scrib
What am I missing? The wife doesn't empty a dishwasher and now the marriage is on the verge of a breakup??? Bi-Polar or not, something doesn't add up.
There MUST have been issues before this, no???
There MUST have been issues before this, no???
Scrib meet Water-s.
Water-s this is Scrib.
#75
Originally Posted by juniorbean
OK, wow... red flag here. You've been down the bi-polar path before, got tired of the mood swings and left after 8 months. So, you chose to not only date another bi-polar girl, but marry her and have a kid.... all by the ripe old age of 24?
This has disaster written all over it. Things are only going to get worse... not better. I would leave the wife but make it mutual so you can still see your daughter, and move on with your life. If she left over a little yelling abotu a dishwasher, you're just seeing the tip of the iceburg here.
Not that you're much better. I mean, your wife basically left you, took the kid, and all you're worried about is selling your 00 Odyssey to buy your parent's 05 Odyssey? With the second biggest concern being new tractors and vans?
Run... run for the hills and never look back. This can only end badly....
This has disaster written all over it. Things are only going to get worse... not better. I would leave the wife but make it mutual so you can still see your daughter, and move on with your life. If she left over a little yelling abotu a dishwasher, you're just seeing the tip of the iceburg here.
Not that you're much better. I mean, your wife basically left you, took the kid, and all you're worried about is selling your 00 Odyssey to buy your parent's 05 Odyssey? With the second biggest concern being new tractors and vans?
Run... run for the hills and never look back. This can only end badly....
Never bi-polar again for me. Meds or not
#77
shes trying to punish you for yelling at her, and its working because youre upset over not seeing your daughter. youre giving her the satisfaction she wants.
also i dont believe they can call the cops on you for picking your daughter up from her grandmothers house. you guys arent divorced and you have equal rights to the child.
leave her ass, take the kid.
also i dont believe they can call the cops on you for picking your daughter up from her grandmothers house. you guys arent divorced and you have equal rights to the child.
leave her ass, take the kid.
#78
Trying again... for the right person this time .....
This has disaster written all over it. Things are only going to get worse... not better. I would leave the wife but make it mutual so you can still see your daughter, and move on with your life. If she left over a little yelling abotu a dishwasher, you're just seeing the tip of the iceburg here.
Not that you're much better. I mean, your wife basically left you, took the kid, and all you're worried about is selling your 00 Odyssey to buy your parent's 05 Odyssey? With the second biggest concern being new tractors and vans?
Run... run for the hills and never look back. This can only end badly. I'm also thinking you dove into the marriage pool head first here (married, kid, at 24) and forgot to check the depth of the water. Get out while the gettin's good....
.
This has disaster written all over it. Things are only going to get worse... not better. I would leave the wife but make it mutual so you can still see your daughter, and move on with your life. If she left over a little yelling abotu a dishwasher, you're just seeing the tip of the iceburg here.
Not that you're much better. I mean, your wife basically left you, took the kid, and all you're worried about is selling your 00 Odyssey to buy your parent's 05 Odyssey? With the second biggest concern being new tractors and vans?
Run... run for the hills and never look back. This can only end badly. I'm also thinking you dove into the marriage pool head first here (married, kid, at 24) and forgot to check the depth of the water. Get out while the gettin's good....
.
Last edited by juniorbean; 04-25-2006 at 03:34 PM.
#80
Originally Posted by juniorbean
Trying again... for the right person this time .....
This has disaster written all over it. Things are only going to get worse... not better. I would leave the wife but make it mutual so you can still see your daughter, and move on with your life. If she left over a little yelling abotu a dishwasher, you're just seeing the tip of the iceburg here.
Not that you're much better. I mean, your wife basically left you, took the kid, and all you're worried about is selling your 00 Odyssey to buy your parent's 05 Odyssey? With the second biggest concern being new tractors and vans?
Run... run for the hills and never look back. This can only end badly. I'm also thinking you dove into the marriage pool head first here (married, kid, at 24) and forgot to check the depth of the water. Get out while the gettin's good....
This has disaster written all over it. Things are only going to get worse... not better. I would leave the wife but make it mutual so you can still see your daughter, and move on with your life. If she left over a little yelling abotu a dishwasher, you're just seeing the tip of the iceburg here.
Not that you're much better. I mean, your wife basically left you, took the kid, and all you're worried about is selling your 00 Odyssey to buy your parent's 05 Odyssey? With the second biggest concern being new tractors and vans?
Run... run for the hills and never look back. This can only end badly. I'm also thinking you dove into the marriage pool head first here (married, kid, at 24) and forgot to check the depth of the water. Get out while the gettin's good....