youngTL

Okay, so I've been seeing this guy Ryan occasionally for the past month. We've hung out about 10 or 12 days out of the month, and became an official couple on the 20th.

The thing is, I'm going away on Sunday for geophysics field school, for one week. What would be a good thing that we can do to spend time with each other? Keep in mind we've already slept together 3 times now (and the second one of those was actually just sleeping), so it's not like this is a first date or anything. I'm just afraid of sitting there with him in silence and boring him. That can happen later after we've been going out for a long time so that it doesn't get awkward.

Some of the things Ryan likes are scary movies, partying, shopping, and doing physical things.

He texted me yesterday saying: "I would like to see u before u leave, is it cool if I call you thursday and we make plans then?"
The problem is that his idea of making plans is "whatever you want to do" and he always seems to like spending time with me no matter what. I just don't want to be boring.

Does anyone have any suggestions what we can do? We like spending time with each other, but it would be nice to be able to go out and do something engaging. I just can't seem to come up with any ideas!

CLPowersWife

I think a lunch/shopping date might be cool... you could take him somewhere kinda far away, like an outlet mall or something like that? Make a day of it, have lunch at a nice place, maybe catch a movie afterwards?

CLpower

personally, if you are in the first few weeks of a relationship and you are worried about sitting in silence, you need to find a new man. That's what amazes me and has shown me what's great about my relationship. After 4 years of talking everyday, we never hit a spot where one of us doesn't have something to say


Cali has some good ideas, do you guys enjoy site seeing or just driving? We'll often have days when we get in a car and just follow roads to see where they take us.

youngTL

I'm too poor to drive everywhere with the way gas is right now.

But let me tell you something. When we're not dead tired (Ryan worked 18 hour days for 4 days last week, and 3 this week), we have plenty to talk about. We talk more and more the longer we know each other because we're starting to get to know each other's lives. Another thing that you might be forgetting is that I can't be as picky as you straight people. Ryan's the first good man I've met in a LONG time. Trust me, they're rare, so when a gay guy finds a good guy, we try to hold on unless it really isn't working. It's not like I can just go out and get another man. I'd be lucky to meet someone as great as him in the next 5 years.

I like the lunch/shopping date idea. That might be the thing to try. For such an avid shopper though, he's been everywhere in Edmonton, so it wouldn't be such a novelty, but it would still be fun. One of his jobs is at Banana Republic in West Edmonton Mall, and he still loves going there with me. I guess the internet search/advice from parents on good places to eat starts today!

moeronn

[QUOTE=CLpower]personally, if you are in the first few weeks of a relationship and you are worried about sitting in silence, you need to find a new man. That's what amazes me and has shown me what's great about my relationship. After 4 years of talking everyday, we never hit a spot where one of us doesn't have something to say [QUOTE]The question is how often do you not really want to hear what the other has to say?

Confortable silence > needless talking

Not to say that conversation and communication are not vital to a good relationship, just that people don't have to be flapping their gums 24/7

CLpower

[QUOTE=moeronn][QUOTE=CLpower]personally, if you are in the first few weeks of a relationship and you are worried about sitting in silence, you need to find a new man. That's what amazes me and has shown me what's great about my relationship. After 4 years of talking everyday, we never hit a spot where one of us doesn't have something to say
true, but "boring" screams i need to get out IMO



And young, gay men don't need to be as picky as straight, there are plenty of gay men out there Don't just hold on to one cause he's a "good" guy

Dan Martin

I don't want to know how you know this.

CLpower

i live in california, i know plenty of gay people

Eggplant-EX

a nice quiet B&B..

lots of alone time and fun

youngTL

I wouldn't say either of us is boring to the other. If that was the case, I really would get out. We had plenty to talk about at my pool party on Sunday. We were the only ones there for an hour or so before the rest of the guests showed up, plus the half hour drive we talked the whole time (I had to go get him).

Thanks for the advice though, it does make me examine things a little more closely and keep me from being totally blinded by lust. Anyway, I'll be checkin later tonight to see if any more ideas get thrown at me. Silly Ryan seems so afraid of doing something that I don't want to do, that he always lets me pick. I really hope he comes up with something this time. If he doesn't I'll have a little talk and ask him really what he wants to do. For someone with a degree in psychology, he sure is confusing sometimes. Oh well, I'm off to go test drive a 2005 TL Auto/non-nav and a 2005 smart fortwo (Passion trim level convertible w/htd leather) with my mom. Her new car search continues.

youngTL

Well it's settled. He actually took the initiative for once and suggested we spend a quiet day in. We only have 6 hours anyway. Then I don't see him for a week!

When I get back, we'll go shopping (for one pair of new shoes for me and maybe some stuff for him), and then take up some of the other things. Thanks for all your help.

p.s. The TL test drive was highly, highly amusing!

NEVERaDuLLmoment

just in case you two opt to go out, why not go out to dinner, get a nice bottle of wine, maybe go out to a cafe after dinner for dessert then go for a walk....

youngTL

We only had 6 hours together

I'll use that idea when I get back from field school. I'll be so horny after a full week of no sex or masturbation (I can't do it in the field, it's not private at all). I'd love to take him out and enjoy having a free day (Labour Day) together. Your idea sounds really romantic.

But those 6 hours I just spent with him were the best I've had in two weeks. He was so sweet to me. We talked, had sex, then talked for another hour, went out for lunch, came back and talked and watched part of The Craft (but ended up having sex again in the middle of it), and then his friend came over just before he had to go, and we all talked for half an hour and then I drove them to cheer practice, gave my bf a big superhug (he almost crushed me haha), and then he winked at me and said he'd see me in a week or so, winked and left. I drove home feeling GREAT! It couldn't have gone better.

And now thanks to all of you I have some great ideas for what to do when I get back!

samkws

what if i have 6 hrs only?

find the closest place that has a bed

gary_william

well, at first I was gonna say but that may have already been covered.

youngTL

It hasn't yet. I'm not really into that but I think I might try it with him once we feel like this thing is going for the long run. Usually that takes some months.