I’m usually done before I even start. 2 pumps would be a marathon

Taking my old man to the hospital now

He’s a moron.

He started coming down with a cold... coughing, sore throat... so what does he do? Sucks back cigarettes like they’re going out of style. I say something. Mama says something. Keeps doing it.

Went to go finally visit my cousin today. Pops ditched out (with smoke in hand) saying he should stay back. So mama bear and I went without him. We get back 3 hours later and he’s in bed. Crazy high fever, coughing like crazy, throat is even worse. Starts complaining about his heart.

Mama bear lost her shit. I heard stuff come out of her mouth that I have never heard her say before in my life. Why? Because he booked a three day trip to Gdańsk for us and we were supposed to depart in the morning. Now we’re left scrambling trying to cancel train tickets and hotels last minute. The rest of the vacation is essentially fucked because we fly out on the 14th and there isn’t much time left to go anywhere now. And those cigarettes definitely made his situation worse. He may have been sick regardless, but he fails to realize he’s 73 years old and anything detrimental he does has a compound effect on his body.

Blood pressure is up. Heart is struggling. And he still won’t fucking listen. It’s fine if it was just the cold, which let’s be honest, is likely a result of poor hand hygiene and could likely have been prevented altogether. But whatever. He didn’t need to compound everything. And seeing as the shit health he’s in, everything is a major worry, no matter what. So off to the hospital we go.

I’m pissed off. He was scolding me for wanting to eat some instant soup after my gut disaster... 20 hours after my last meal. I know that shit isn’t great, but whatever, it was getting late and my food options were limited. But I listened and grudgingly threw it out and stuck to eating some plain ham on dry bread. But when we tell him to drop the fucking smokes, he tells us to pound sound and literally ends up looking like he’s going to die in front of us.

Mama bear told me to pack my shit and get outta dodge on my own for the rest of the trip. She doesn’t want me sitting around because of him, doing nothing. I’m having an internal struggle now, not knowing what to do. I want to check out that salt mine tour I missed. I want to see auschwitz, as horrible as I know it will be. But leaving seems like a bad idea. Not sure what to do. FML. /rant.

Did I mention it’s mama bear’s birthday tomorrow? Yep, plans for that all got thrown out the window also.

And make him watch

Can you just go without him?

nope. We were supposed to be in Gdańsk. We no longer have train tickets or hotels booked. This morning was the last time we could leave. It’s a half day travel there, another half day back. Leaving tomorrow simply won’t leave enough time for much. And she won’t leave him by himself now.

the guy refuses to climb a single flight of stairs if he doesn’t have to.

Gonna take mama bear on a mini excursion tomorrow to get away from toxic Todd.

All will be well. Gonna make the best of the remaining time we have. No point stressing about stuff we can’t change now.

I’m bored out of my skull. Had fuck all to do here. Was around town for a few hours but most everything is generally closed on sundays in Poland.

Tomorrow should be good. And the day after I’m going to go see Auschwitz, alone. I’m nervous. I don’t expect it to be pleasant whatsoever. The hairs on my arms were already standing when I was looking into the tour.

Maybe I can just rent a Russian built helicopter, somewhere. Those pieces of shit can’t be that expensive.