FFS KURT: Tesla Edition

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Old 04-26-2021, 09:08 AM
  #441  
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Originally Posted by civicdrivr
You can buy an "exhaust" for your Tesla too:

https://www.hautopart.com/product/te...-sound-buzzer/

HFS! A grand for a bluetooth speaker in a metal resonator? I'm in the wrong fucking business.
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Old 04-26-2021, 09:09 AM
  #442  
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Originally Posted by kurtatx
Yes. It's called boombox mode. Someone at the storefront here was driving around with ice cream truck music.

The car does make some noise, particularly when pre-conditioning the battery and it does sound like a spaceship.
Interesting. Still hate them, but at least there's that amusing novelty feature.
Old 04-26-2021, 09:24 AM
  #443  
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Originally Posted by cu2wagon
Interesting. Still hate them, but at least there's that amusing novelty feature.
You can replace the horn, too. I left the horn on my wife's car as La cucacracha

Most of the novelties are terrible, though.
Old 04-26-2021, 09:32 AM
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Originally Posted by cu2wagon
Interesting. Still hate them, but at least there's that amusing novelty feature.
Most of the novelties and gimmicks are stupid and rarely/if ever used. I honestly wish they'd put that development effort and money into other things like build quality and actually making FSD...FSD. Some of the novelties like Netflix streaming and stuff are cool because you can then chill in your car and watch netflix while charging, they have a purpose.
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Old 04-26-2021, 09:36 AM
  #445  
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Pfft.... Who'd want FSD when you can have the ability to say "open butthole" and the charging hatch pops open?

That's just development money well spent.
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Old 04-26-2021, 09:37 AM
  #446  
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Originally Posted by cu2wagon
Pfft.... Who'd want FSD when you can have the ability to say "open butthole" and the charging hatch pops open?

That's just development money well spent.
"My ass is cold" turns on the seat heaters.

my favorite is "Keep Summer Safe" turns on Sentry Mode.
Old 04-26-2021, 10:31 AM
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You can also say "my balls are cold" to turn on the seat heaters.

Or "mans not hot" to lower the temp 3*F.
Old 04-26-2021, 12:17 PM
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or "wife is in the car" for it to automatically cycle seat heater on, ac to freezing cold back up to 75 to vents pointed at you OMG I'm SO HOT to pointed up and away for OH I'm so cold to OMG it's so nice out window down for 10 seconds before the inevitable IT'S SO HUMID I JUST DID MY HAIR PUT THEM UP.

It continues that cycle every 5 minutes or so to mimic real time.
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Old 04-26-2021, 12:24 PM
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Sometimes when your too nice and accommodating, they don’t know what to do with it.


For you

Last edited by Acura TL Builder; 04-26-2021 at 12:28 PM.
Old 04-26-2021, 01:19 PM
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Originally Posted by rockstar143
or "wife is in the car" for it to automatically cycle seat heater on, ac to freezing cold back up to 75 to vents pointed at you OMG I'm SO HOT to pointed up and away for OH I'm so cold to OMG it's so nice out window down for 10 seconds before the inevitable IT'S SO HUMID I JUST DID MY HAIR PUT THEM UP.

It continues that cycle every 5 minutes or so to mimic real time.
You been spying on us? Oh wait...Florida.
Old 04-26-2021, 01:55 PM
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Originally Posted by 1killercls
you been spying on us? Oh wait...florida. women
ffa
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Old 04-26-2021, 08:46 PM
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I said, Biiiiiiii....

- Key & Peele
Old 04-27-2021, 06:23 AM
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I saw a model X today and thought to myself...that looks cool.
Old 04-27-2021, 06:36 AM
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Same, but it doesn’t have that spark invoking look to it. Now a well kept 3g, eye candy!

Kurt your new avatar looks nice, but kind of looks like a uterus.

Marnin’ yall
Old 04-27-2021, 08:32 AM
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Originally Posted by rockstar143
or "wife is in the car" for it to automatically cycle seat heater on, ac to freezing cold back up to 75 to vents pointed at you OMG I'm SO HOT to pointed up and away for OH I'm so cold to OMG it's so nice out window down for 10 seconds before the inevitable IT'S SO HUMID I JUST DID MY HAIR PUT THEM UP.

It continues that cycle every 5 minutes or so to mimic real time.
Glad I'm not the only person dealing with this.
Old 04-27-2021, 08:43 AM
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damn thyroids out of whack!
replace your thermostat, lady!
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Old 04-29-2021, 08:28 PM
  #457  
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Who dis?
Old 04-29-2021, 11:17 PM
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Originally Posted by Acura TL Builder


Who dis?
Taco?
Old 04-29-2021, 11:17 PM
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Poor Tobey.
Old 04-29-2021, 11:19 PM
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Tobey is rich off the book advance.
Adam is poor though. Bums never paid him for the BJ's he took IOU's for.
Old 04-29-2021, 11:47 PM
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What a maroon.
Old 04-30-2021, 12:11 AM
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AND he let them live in his basement for free..

fuccking a, read a book about real estate..c mon!
Old 04-30-2021, 06:48 AM
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you know that with his low selfie steam problem he probably is only alive today because
of the attention he gets from us in here. "guest"
Old 04-30-2021, 11:37 AM
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Originally Posted by cu2wagon
What a maroon.
What a ninkurtpoop.
Old 04-30-2021, 11:57 AM
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First news report I've heard of a Tesla refusing to take direction in Autonomous mode. Driver was Kurt.
Tesla refused to move until Kurt finds its lost wheels.
Old 04-30-2021, 01:33 PM
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Originally Posted by rockstar143
First news report I've heard of a Tesla refusing to take direction in Autonomous mode. Driver was Kurt.
Tesla refused to move until Kurt finds its lost wheels.
you're a dick


...


Old 04-30-2021, 07:52 PM
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#born this way
Old 06-21-2021, 08:14 AM
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So, without getting too into it, the Model 3 is finally being repaired for hail damage. I expect to get it back later this week or early next week.

In the meantime, I was in a wedding so my wife and I needed two cars (rentals are still a pipe dream in the current market). Anyway, decided to try Turo and here's what I got:






Rate was good and had never driven a Mercedes. Overall a decent experience.
Old 06-21-2021, 08:22 AM
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Comparisons to 2018 Mercedes C300 vs Tesla Model 3

Mercedes Pros
  • The materials are far, far better
  • All the permanent controls are manual buttons. To me, this was huge
  • During most driving, the Mercedes was FAR quieter than my Model Y, which has more sound deadening than my Model 3 does
  • Apple CarPlay is great
Mercedes Cons compared to Model 3
  • To get a car even close to the quickness of the Model 3, I would need to spend $60K or $40K+ used
  • Old school gauge cluster - to me this is just not an improvement over having the speed in the upper right hand corner of the Tesla screen
  • Fewer standard features
  • No crazy suite of cameras
  • Fucking Gas is fucking annoying and I hate it

Ultimately, I'm glad I got to try it, but I was dying to get back in the Model Y (and even more so the Model 3). Not included in this brief assessment was the fact that the Mercedes had an issue where the battery was throwing an error but the battery was new. It wasn't a problem but there was a bunch of information I couldn't see.

Also, in general, I prefer the character of an EV with regen over an ICE car in most applications (particularly stop and go traffic). Also, I think there is a happy medium with car quickness, and I think it is about 4 seconds. The Mercedes was unbelievably slow compared to what I'm used to and that 2.0T really did make a lot of noise for very little speed output.
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Old 06-21-2021, 08:58 AM
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Oooof, the 2.0T... not that anything short of an AMG would've come close in acceleration, but the 2l is terrible.

I bet the owner replaced the battery but didn't reset the systems.

I appreciate the quick and dirty comparo. I'm really not surprised by bullet #1 in the pros section though
Old 06-21-2021, 10:06 AM
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No surprise that the materials are better, guessing overall build was better too.

Edit: You have the pre-refresh model right? They changed/updated quite a bit for quality and NVH characteristics with the updated model 3.

Last edited by SamDoe1; 06-21-2021 at 10:12 AM.
Old 06-21-2021, 12:21 PM
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Originally Posted by SamDoe1
No surprise that the materials are better, guessing overall build was better too.

Edit: You have the pre-refresh model right? They changed/updated quite a bit for quality and NVH characteristics with the updated model 3.
I do have the pre refresh 3. It's a bit louder than our Y. In either case, the Mercedes was much quieter.
Old 06-21-2021, 12:40 PM
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You need to replace that Merc steering wheel with a yoke one stat.
Old 06-21-2021, 01:04 PM
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I quite enjoyed my C300, mine was around 6 sec 0-60 IIRC. The one you showed looks to be newer than mine. The 7AT in mine worked well, but I haven't driven one with the 9 spd.
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Old 06-21-2021, 01:41 PM
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Originally Posted by 00TL-P3.2
I quite enjoyed my C300, mine was around 6 sec 0-60 IIRC. The one you showed looks to be newer than mine. The 7AT in mine worked well, but I haven't driven one with the 9 spd.
Honestly, if it weren't for the fact that I had that insane EV acceleration on two of my cars, the Merc would be far more impressive. I don't know that I like it better than the Audis I have had prior but it was very impressive.
Old 06-21-2021, 02:12 PM
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I went backward, from the torquey turbo 4 in the C, to the mole-asses gutless Malibu.
Need to get cracking on the Rotus & get some fun back into my driving.
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Old 06-21-2021, 07:13 PM
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Originally Posted by Yumcha
You need to replace that Merc steering wheel with a yoke one stat.
Clearly not a racecar.

Why even bother renting a car without one, Kurt? Jesus.
Old 06-21-2021, 11:06 PM
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Originally Posted by Costco
Clearly not a racecar.

Why even bother renting a car without one, Kurt? Jesus.
I'm a disgrace
Old 06-22-2021, 06:35 AM
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I love the review...
I've recently fucked around with Merc and I have to say, they have some fun design and engineering quirks.
I like them a lot more than I want to admit.

Glad you're still happy with the Tesla though, Kurt.
Old 11-08-2021, 06:10 PM
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Cleaned her up today. She creaks but damn is she a beast. A woman walked out of a store I was parked in front of, said "Now THAT'S a nice car" then just walked back inside".

Well...thanks.





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