i agree.

 

Not for me. Fuck it, she has feelings for someone else, I'm gone. You can't control that. I wouldn't even call it cheating, I would call it finding someone new.

If she sucked someone else's dick and didnt' think anything of it, what the hell am i doing with this slut? It's infinitely more disrespectful to me.

I would rather have my gf that I loved find someone else she has intense feelings for, lose all her feelings for me, and then dump me than find out she sucked off random guys she didn't give a shit about and then run back to me.

 

FCK that and that whole she didnt care about the other guy...say bro if she really loved you like she's telling you right now she would never had done that shit and you shouldnt forgive her

 

So any updates, what have you decided ?

 

I cheated on my gf (3times...no sex, just kissing) and was caught by one of her friends, and admitted to it. This was in the first yr of our relationship. She took me back and we have now been together 5yrs. Sure I get tempted...but who doesnt???
I haven't cheated on her after that, and her taking me back really did change me for the better...
I dont agree with the 'once a cheater, always a cheater'....I think every situation is unique and it all depends on how much of a change you see in your fiancee, and if you believe it. There are ALWAYS going to be times when you think about her cheating, but if you both are willing to work towards making this happen...its VERY possible.

 

Sorry to hear about your situation.

I would definitely bail.....if it were the other way around you would be on the curb. I know it sucks to throw away the 5 years, but at least you found out before she got 50% of your stuff.

If she thought you were the one for her....she wouldn't have cheated in the first place.

 

does 'just kissing' classify as 'cheating'? i always tought that some form of penetration was required for cheating to have occurred. opinions?

 

I would have to bail, or at least take your ring back and tell her she can get it back in a few years if stuff works out (I will guess: no)

 

Do it to her....
...then say "now we're even"!

 

im not saying once a cheater always a cheater...but u need to check up on her..anyone who is cheating can be caught. make her think everything is cool but do your homework to make sure the guy is totally out of the picture..bottom line is if she IS faithful and wants to go ahead with the wedding..she will want to prove it no matter what, be it showing u phone bills, changing her cell no. whatever it takes!! u have to let her know that u arent taking no shit or she will still be trying to fuck off.

 

you could get her the invisible fence, works really great with dogs too

 

3 questions:
How hot is she? If she's 8+, then this will happen again
When is she signing the prenup?
And how large is the dowry?

 

Dude come on....give us an update. I'm interested to know what you have decided

 

Sorry guys, haven't been around in a while. i pretty much knew it would come to this- we have put off our plans of marriage. who knows what the future holds, just not a good time to get into a lifelong bond. i appreciate you guys being honest on here.

hard to really talk about and give full detail, but i couldn't be settled with the relationship. need to clear my head and figure some more things out.

not an all out bail - yet - but a definite step back. time will tell at this point.
Thanks to All again.

 

Good Man, I'm sure its not easy and kinda embarssing at the same time, since i'm sure your friends family etc..... where looking forward to the date of you 2 been married.

About a 1 year and a bit I was in a similar situation like yourself, partly my fault with not giving enough attention, she started to talk to someone else, I caught it before it had went any futher, but in my mind the damage was all ready done.

In my mind i always assumed she would be the last person on earth, to even consider cheating, given time I think it would of came to that... But I changed the things she wanted to see in me and just this weekend we where talking about how lucky we both are and how much we love each other, 10/10 weekend ( 4years last week), personally for me it was not easy on many fronts, but I had to made the chioce either move on or stay.

Trust me, you chioce on what your future holds with this woman is something you need alot of time to think about, sure its hard to walk away with someone you have 5years with and all the intentions that go with it.

But you have to wonder was this really for 1st time her doing this or has there been other times she's cheated on you. IF you decide to stay and get married, this will always be in your mind for many years to come, of which i'm sure her cheating on you will come up, she's not going to like it.

At this point in time, the damage is done, just take it day by day, again personally for me it took the best part of a year to put behind her mistake out of my mind and move on.... again over time you will look at it differently as you not going to be as emotional about it, but everybody is different.

BTW i'm no angel, no where near it I regret to say.

Don't be a stranger and keep us up todate...

Goodluck..........

 

Drop her ass man, u dont need someone like that. I would #*ck her sister/best friend/cousin u get the point, just what i would do

 

 

Once a cheater..always a cheater... simple as that & 99.9% true!

 

thanks for the update... good luck with that.. i am glad that you made a wise decision.. even though it may be hard to just walk away, it is harder to stay in it and work at it... but you did invest a substantial amount of time in the relationship to just walk away...

 

Jaded?

 

without trust, there is no love. you need to figure out whether you're willing to forgive her. if you are, never ever bring it up again. if not, then break it off NOW. not 2 days before the wedding, and certainly not after.

 

You'd be smart to dump her completely and move on. Don't set yourself up for a bunch of heartache.

 

Um, sorry to be the contrarian, but if the dialogue between the two of these folks is real, genuine and intense, there is an opportunity - not to "repair' the relationship, but move it into a different level.

She needs to sort out, perhaps with the help of a pro, what caused her to bolt the pasture - pre-wedding jitters, a feeling of being shut down forever, a feeling of loss, a feeling - not fully articulated - of being frustrated in the relationship as it stands....... Depending upon what drove her indiscretion, the reasons may well tank a potential marriage because she may conclude that the "fit" is not right.

He needs to work through his anger if he is going to return to any form of relationship with her at all..... and anger it is.

If the two can work this through, the bond will become tighter. If not, they relationship will fly apart, and probably should. But - at the core, both need to recognize that they are each/both human, imperfect, and liable to errors of judgement. And that hardly stops at the alter upon being married...............

 

...and make sure you get the ring back.

 

Moulin Rouge

 

Three Words....fu##ing Leave Her! Ok Four>>>fu##ing Leave Her Asap!