Alright, so i'm here at work... 12:00 a.m. MIDNIGHT!!! working the graveyard shift... lucky me... anyways... I havn't spent time with my wife as much as I should... and we just got back together from a weird and confussing type of argument we had... Most of you know what happened... Anyways... I havn't been spending much time with her... I can tell she's trying to me more affectionate towards be then before and showing me that she does want to be with me... which i think is good progress... she has given up going on the IM's etc... and chatting... etc... and i've basicly changed some stuff that were killing the time between us too... like excessivly playing the playstation and watching tv... etc...

To the game guys... i only got to 10% completion on GT4

Well, we havn't had time to be close... usually i'm out early in the morning... and she is getting up to go to school or work... so i go to sleep with her for about 3 to 4 hours a night... when she returns from where she went either school or work... i'm getting ready to leave to work again... this has been happening for the past 3 weeks since i left my old job... and got this new job for 3 bucks and hour more... Guess she was really missing me today because she just wanted to lay with me... (to you dirty minded people... yes you are correct!!!)... So i guess i'm going to have to find a new job to find more time to spend with my family... but this job pays pretty good... i'll be doing $13 and hour by November if i stay... better then the $10 i was doing... Back to me and my girl... Guess the thing with me was that i was (not jelous) but overly-worried that she might of been cheating on me (before she left me)... thus, me checking up on her etc... and that is what i'm guessing pushed her away to leave me about a month ago... thing is... here at work... got me thinking... is this human nature to do things like this...

Anyways... i came to thinking while here at work... nothing really to do with the above... but the above did get me thinking some stuff... (btw: my mind works in mysterious ways... and i don't know how to put my thoughts together correctly so bare with me...)

Is it human nature (or just the way things are/suppose to be) to always look for a different partner???

Now here's the thing... hopefully the IT guys here at work can't read this... :gheylaugh: ... There are a few people that i've found out that have been cheating on their spouse/partner (sp)... but its not just here at work... its also around my social life (friends etc...) My friend's father just broke it off with my friends mother because his father found some younger gal... etc... they've been married for over 20 years since my friend is about a year older then me... the guys here at work were talking and this guy with a wife and kids were talking about getting drunk and f#$%ing random chicks etc... there are some ladies here with husbands and kids that are doing the same crap... i'm like

Now to me this shit is wrong and I can't even think of doing this to my life partner (My Girl)... but i'm kinda worried that she might not think the same way... Now i'm also curious to see if other people think the same way as me... In other words... never cheat on your partner regardless... because i've been seeing... observing you can say... other people's relationships... and they are all out of wack... everyone is just cheating on everyone... when you meet people its all nice and what not... but after you get to know them for a week or two... man, do things change... my view/respect towards them just diminishes... :shakehead

I was raised to love, respect, and be with only one person and that person for the rest of my life (apart from all the dateing in highschool and parties etc...) The getting ready to settle down thing... but different ways of being raised differs between everyone... and that is the way I was raised... that is the way i beleive it should be... but I just figured out its not... ... ... Now another question... why do people do this type of stuff??? cheat on their loved one's... not really loved ones if you are cheating on them... I just turned 22... so yeah i'm young and inexperienced in this game... but is this "cheating" natural for a person do to... do people do it because they need/want/have to do it??? is it because of the way they were raised/tought/saw their parents or others live???

I agree, that people before you find the right person for you go out party... have those 1 night stands... or even date here and there and have sex all over the place etc... but when its time to settle down... meaning you and your soul mate... do people actually beleive that is it... or do they go looking for that freedom again and again afterwards even though they have something there already... something perfect...

I don't know... i guess i just had to type this out to you all...

Opinions and comments welcomed...

[/rant]



btw: I think my girl wanted a topic for a persuasive essay... this looks like a good oportunity to find out what she thinks of the subject... debate!!!

 

Cliffs notes please....

 

Killer, I guess he wants to know why people cheat on their s/o's, gf/bf, if they say they love them or want to be with them.

Spooky, I dont know if its human nature to be looking for a different partner, but they seem to be pondering about the "what if"... and to why people cheat, some do it cause they can get away with it and enjoy "sneaking" around behind their partner. Some enjoy their partner, but have someone else to fulfill their needs in other ways perhaps.

 

People cheat because certain needs are not being met whether they be emotional, goals in life or physical.

That and some people are just scumbags.

 

I absolutely agree and unfortunately, its not anymore complex than that. Some people cheat because they don't value commitment. And some people who do value commitment cheat because their commitment lacks value.

 

I'm seeing it all around me though... My friends parents... my coworkers... everyone that i've talked to basicly is cheating or has cheated on their partner regardless of what situation they are in... Married with kids... not married but with kids... no kids but married... etc... Its like... WTF is wrong with the world... I guess it was late and had a lot on my mind and not enough work last night...

Guess its not more complex then that... just wondering why the hell people do this to their so called "Loved ones"...

... ... ... scumbags... I guess you are right... guess my self respect for a lot of people has just gone to shit... oh well... life goes on...

So if i were to write a persuasive essay on this... like i said above... what would be the debate

Is it ok to cheat behind your "Loved One's" back??? <~~~ good title???

The only problem i see would be that most people would say "No" to that... that it isn't right... nor OK... but in reality, they've done it if not once... or more times to their loved one...

<~~~ has to much time on his hands... i guess i'll take my daughter to go play at the park...

 

Once you get in a committed relationship, morally you should not cheat. Wanna cheat, but can't cheat. I look at it this way: How would I feel if my woman cheated on me. That gives me enough reason not to cheat. Now if she cheats before telling me about it, all bets are off. I never cheated when we became "exclusive." Before the "exclusivity" agreement, I date 2-3 people at the same time. I don't consider that cheating.

 

i agree. and whether the person acts on their lack of "needs being met" all boils down to whether they have respect for their partner (and themselves for that matter).

people who cheat are weak, in my eyes. they lack the ability to either confront the problem in their current relationship, or they lack the strength to break up with the person and let go of something they really aren't happy with anyway.

unfortunately, people all around cheat. i'm glad i can say i never have. i don't think i could live with myself, honestly.

 

Expectations...that's the KEY...when you started your relationship...what did you expect then? what do you expect now? and what do you expect in the future? A partner that meets and keeps up with the MAJORITY of your expectations is a winner... but the only way they will know is for you to communicate.... hope this helps some...coming from a frumpy, almost 40 y/o who wishes he knew then, what he knows now...

 

i can agree with the first part yes but not so much with the rest....

 

EXACTLY

Expectations, from my experience, that is where it all comes from. Most of us expect too much when we start a relationship and when it doesn't happen the way we expected, well the rest is history. The fact of the matter is, genetically speaking men are wired to have more than one sexual partner (this is not an excuse! we still are supposed to have self discipline) Yes weakness does play a part in this whole sceario
I was married for 22 years to a really really great woman, unfortunately we married for the wrong reasons (not love, convenience) and I stayed to raise a child, once he was of age I had to go! Was that wrong? I don't know, I do know I HAD to go, but I didn't "cheat" (self discipline?)
As you make your way in life try not to expect too much (we are all only human) and please marry only when you know for sure that the partner you have found is the right one, too many of us do things for the wrong reasons, whatever they may be. the only thing that will keep you from wishing/wandering/whatever is real Love, which to me is as much respect for the other person as it is anything else!

 

Totally agree with you Zapata.

smg, consider the situation when you add children to the mix. If I ever lost feelings for my wife, it would be an extremely difficult decision to end it considering my children.

 

communication is key. good conversation can usually resolve things. doesn't stop the white hairs on my head from all her but....we can figure out pretty much anything by talking.

 

Communication is the most important aspect of a relationship. W/o it you aren't going anywhere.

 

Good point. You sound like Dr.Phil

 

People cheat for one reason only and they keep cheating for another reason. The reason people cheat is because one or all of their needs are not being met...If you value your relationship, spend time with that person. This is one reason why long distance relationships hardly work. The time factor alone is against them. That drives them to seek people close to them to share common interests. And although sex may have been far from the plan, it eventually will creep in. The reason people keep cheating is because they have gotten away with it the first time. The key to a successful affair-free relationship...is Committment. Always put the other person first, no matter what is going on in your life. If you do that for them, they will do it for you...and the rewards are astronomical!! Don't be discouraged by what you see around you, stay committed to your s/o and value them, show it to them daily, and all will work out.

 

^^who is that in your avi? It looks oddly familiar

 

That's me.

 

Weird....I dont think I've ever seen your picture before, but that pic has a strange familiarity..strange

I think Im going crazy

 

think?!?/!?11!


you're the mayor of crazytown and i'm second in command. thats why we have so much fun GDucks!

 

I have never posted my pic on here, but nonetheless, it's me...are you saying that I look odd??LOL I live in TX and have never really been anywhere else except as a child.

 

No, not odd at all. You're very pretty. You just look familiar to me for some reason.

No biggy, probably just my overactive imagination. Like Nicholbritches said, I'm the mayer of crazy town these days.

 

Thanx Mayor!

 

Maybe you banged her?

 

Can i get a mod to change my SN to Nicholbritches please?

 

thought you might like that...not sure why

 

because you are my hero and fantastically creative sir

I think you and chopper are the only ones who refer to me as that you crazy fawkers