*motion for her to come over with your index finger*

"baby, if I can get you to come with one finger, imagine what I can do with all five (or ten)".

 

 

I laughed at this one as well.

 

with a d*ck this big, do i really need a porsche? ( gotta be > 9 inches) lol

you: do you know why girls like small guys?
her: why
you: cause we have to wotk TWICE as hard, to get HALF as far. ( if youre < 5 inches) lol

 

"I don't know your fucking name so what let's fuck"


^ Some people might recognize this line from a certain song

 

this is my fav. by far. iono if this has ever been told before, but here it goes... the girls think it's CUTE.

Me: "Hey, did you know that there were 25 letters in the alphabet"
(this is the tricky part, if she's a stupid, she would agree, but if she truly has brains, this is how it's supposed to go)
Her: wait, i thought there were 26 letters?
Me: O yea, you're right, I'm missing U.

^ most of the timel it'll work. lol

Here's my other one

"Hey my name is Donald, but you can call me TONIGHT"

cool thing is, you can use both these lines back n forth to break the ice.

HONESTLY never used them before to PICK UP a chick. tested them on the girl-friends and they said it was cute. lol

 

^^^ haha that is pretty clever. i'm gonna use those lines next time. lol

 

^
lol.. i put it to use and the girl turned out to be a stupid..

 

ya that will be my luck

 

porn, I mean korn - ADIDAS

 

Not sure if this always works, but one night at a club, a really nice looking girl asked me to dance and I said..."No, that's alright" She asked why not. I told her that I wanted to dance with her friend instead. Her friend heard me and danced with me..then, after I danced with her, the original girl started dancing with me.

The next morning when she was leaving my apartment....(true story)..being an asshole worked that time like a charm..my friend got some benefits out of that because he took her friend back to his crib lmao

 

What do you say if you are between 9 - 5?

Ha ha...

I work with this metro sexual guy that uses lines like "Is there an airport near by? Cause my heart just took off." And he does a plane motion with his hand. This shit worked on a chick in vegas. I don't know how.

Mine seems to work. "You don't sweat much for a fat chick"

 

best pick up line:

"I told myself I wouldn't let such a fine girl intimidate me, I just wanted to ask you a question."

if she smiles in the least bit, then you proceed by touching her elbow a little and ask her:
"can you give me three things that make your pussy wet", nah I'm playin, just ask her, "give me three things that turn you on in a man"
As she says them, you say "check". then once she smiles or laughs, you know you got her hooked.

Of course, I'm married and I haven't actually tried this out, but I'm sure it'll work if the approach is smooth enough.

 

haha nice one ron. that how you got your wife?

 

Ok, I got another one, and I saw this online somewhere, but I had my younger cousin try it and it worked like a charm.

You approach the girl liek you would approach a dog, by not confronting her with your front, but more or less your side so she doesn't feel threatened. You say, "can I ask you a question?", then you say, "I'm sorry, first off, my name is ----," then shake her hand. At this point she should say her name which is a good sign. She'll be anxious to see what your question was by now, and she def won't expect this one. You say, "would you consider dating a guy if you found out he still sleeps with a teddy bear?" She should be giggling by now, all you have to do is say that your friend is the one with the problem, not you. and convo starts.

 

We pulled up to a group of girls at In-N-Out and I shouted to them "Ya'll wanna FUCK?!" (my friend had been saying it all day and it was stuck in my head) They all turned around, one raised her hand and said "yes!" I then said "aww nevermind" and they, along with my friends all started laughing

I guess it was a pick-up line and a drop-off line combo

 

My car has seat heaters. Nuff said.

 

This really isn't a pick up line but kind of funny... Having sex with a fat chick is like riding a moped. It's only fun until your friends catch you doing it.

 

 

Is that all it takes in Alabama?

 

why didn't you fuck?

 

Yeah, I wouldn't bang her either, after she reacted like that, something is fishy, no pun intended.

 

i think i remember this from HITCH???

 

hey, you wanna go half on a baby?

 

"is your dad a plumber? cause your the shit!"

"you minus well sleep with me because i'm gonna tell everyone you did anyways!"

"be my girlfriend or i'm gonna punch your fcuken face!"

"if i flip this quarter, whats the chances of me getting head?"

"i know this ain't mcdonalds, but i love to see you smile"

"fcuk the food, you can be my happy meal"

"hey come here" *with the motion of a finger telling the chick to come to you*
*Girl comes over*
"If I made you come with a finger, imagine what I would do with my hand?"

"ehh girl, wanna play basketball? you bounce, i shoot"

"hey can i see the tag on your top?" *girl asks why?*
....just wanted to see if your "made in heaven"

"damn girl, did you rub bacon on your face? cause your face is OILY!"

"you scratch my back i'll scratch yours, but the funny thing is... it's on my cock"

you- "what did you eat under there?"
her- "under where?"
you- "ahahahah LMAO you eat underwear!!"

"i'm still a virgin"

walk up to a girl and say... "hi! i'm waiting for my friends to call. not sure if my cell phone is working. can you call me to see if it works?" ;o)

"if you were a booger, i'd pick you first!"

"hey, can i ask you a question?
you got friends right?
you also got boys who are friends right?
cool, can i be your boyfriend?"

"if you and I were squirrels could I bust a nut in your hole?"



k done.

 

wanna fuk?

 

That only worked with my g/f on the first date. If you want an Alabama girl say you have a Z71 with a 4" lift, 34" tires, a CB radio, and a mud guard. Your in.

 

By grecosteve

like that? LOL

 

^ That is exactly what I am talking about. I would take my CL over a raised up pos any day.

 

lol thats not my car, its a friend of mine, it just sits in the parking lot at his work lol

 

Are Tapout stickers the new Confederate flag for trucks?

 

Looks like your buddy's truck is in the wrong state then.

 

Tell him to move down here.

 

Saying "thanks" when a girl says you have nice arms.

Trust me, I'm a doctor.

 

"Girl, let me suck them toes!" Lol jk that's some nasssty shiet .... Or IS it?

 

are those real?

(whether they are or not, they respond: no)

can i feel them?

 

damn you beat me to it. i was looking for that clip from dont be a menace. lmao classic! "Break yoself!!! gimme yo goddamn number come one hurry up!!!"

 

"u make me happy in my pants "

"theres a party in my pants... and ur invited"

 

 

I have a boner, wanna see?