Not the pretty girlfriend
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Not the pretty girlfriend
My boyfriend and I have been together for about 6 years. Last night after eating, we began talking about our realationship. All I remember about the conversation is that he said that I was not the prettiest girlfriend he has had. Hmmm. What do the ladies and gents think about this? (Yes. Inkonspikuos is a female)
Making it Happen
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Originally Posted by inkonspikuos
My boyfriend and I have been together for about 6 years. Last night after eating, we began talking about our realationship. All I remember about the conversation is that he said that I was not the prettiest girlfriend he has had. Hmmm. What do the ladies and gents think about this? (Yes. Inkonspikuos is a female)
Team Owner
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From: Jersey
Even if true, probably not something he should have said. But let us be the judges, put up a pic.
BTW, not being the prettiest doesn't mean that you aren't the best GF he has had. Shit, he's stayed around for 6 years.
BTW, not being the prettiest doesn't mean that you aren't the best GF he has had. Shit, he's stayed around for 6 years.
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Suzuka Master
Joined: Jun 2004
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From: D.istrict of C.orruption
Originally Posted by doopstr
... not being the prettiest doesn't mean that you aren't the best GF he has had. Shit, he's stayed around for 6 years.
So how old are you guys now?
Swift 3 B-A-N-G-E-R
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From: Salinas, CA ~to~ Yuma, AZ
Originally Posted by darksom1
Is this a trick question?? 
Also...
I mean, how else can we really answer this question correctly? I sense more clarity can be achieved by posting a few noods as well!
Also...
I mean, how else can we really answer this question correctly? I sense more clarity can be achieved by posting a few noods as well!
To the point... Be glad he's being honest with you and not lying like all the rest of us that say that their girl is the prettiest... maybe he has had prettier girlfriends then you... so what... you just have to be the best girlfriend he's had...
on a lighter note...
Seems like steak and a BJ works well around these parts... so i'll suggest you try or surprise him with that...
Earth-bound misfit
Joined: Mar 2006
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As others have said, you clearly have other attributes that have kept his interest.
I wouldn't be too bothered by it.
As long as his tone wasn't deliberately hurtful, of course. If he was being nasty, that's a whole other ballgame.
I wouldn't be too bothered by it.
As long as his tone wasn't deliberately hurtful, of course. If he was being nasty, that's a whole other ballgame.
Arriving Somewhere...
Joined: Apr 2006
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From: Pittsburgh
That was a pretty vague first post with no follow-up. My guess is that it's either not a chick at all, or she's hoping for PMs, picture requests, and/or general attention.
If you're really looking for advice, you might want to post a bit more context of the conversation...
If you're really looking for advice, you might want to post a bit more context of the conversation...
Si Vis Pacem, Para Bellum
Joined: Aug 2007
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From: Pasadena, CA
Originally Posted by Mockenrue
That was a pretty vague first post with no follow-up. My guess is that it's either not a chick at all, or she's hoping for PMs, picture requests, and/or general attention.
If you're really looking for advice, you might want to post a bit more context of the conversation...
If you're really looking for advice, you might want to post a bit more context of the conversation...
Personally, I wouldn't be offended. In fact I'm sure my wife dated guys better looking that I am. In fact I kinda hope she did. Most people that get together purely on looks don't go the distance.
For me, I think I have dated women that were cuter that my wife, but there is NO chance in hell I have any regrets. My wife is an awesome woman.
<----- Plus I'm damn glad she saw past my looks.
For me, I think I have dated women that were cuter that my wife, but there is NO chance in hell I have any regrets. My wife is an awesome woman.
<----- Plus I'm damn glad she saw past my looks.
Earth-bound misfit
Joined: Mar 2006
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Originally Posted by Mockenrue
That was a pretty vague first post with no follow-up. My guess is that it's either not a chick at all, or she's hoping for PMs, picture requests, and/or general attention.
If you're really looking for advice, you might want to post a bit more context of the conversation...
If you're really looking for advice, you might want to post a bit more context of the conversation...
Hmmm...Nov 2007 join date... 
Drifting
Joined: Jul 2006
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From: Pleasant Hill, CA
Originally Posted by RaviNJCLs
By the way....this is why talking about all your past relationships is never a great idea.
Even if he didn't mean anything by it, it was still kind of a dick thing to say.
Oh Hullow
Joined: Jun 2006
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From: Freehold, NJ
kind of OT but why do girls always pry about past relations with other girls whether it be past g/f or hookups???? it never ends with an "oh ok" it always leads to insecurity, fights, and it getting brought up in arguments about shit that has nothing to do with it.
but yes it was a dick thing to say... did the sarcasm meter go off by any chance? or are you sure he was being serious. i have a tendency to put my foot in my mouth for the sake of comedy sometimes. lol. as most guys do.
but yes it was a dick thing to say... did the sarcasm meter go off by any chance? or are you sure he was being serious. i have a tendency to put my foot in my mouth for the sake of comedy sometimes. lol. as most guys do.
werd
Joined: Feb 2002
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Obviously the thought of a hotter girl in the context of your boyfriend's past is a threat to you, hence the topic. You don't have the self-esteem or resolve to look past his brash remark with a witty retort. It's OK (since that's what you want to hear anyway), I'm sure he thinks you have other attributes that far makeup what you lack in the looks department.
If you want to keep him around, and I would question that resolve, you might want to hit the gym a bit harder and start buying more revealing clothes. Let's hope, for your sake, that he keeps his dick in his pants.
If you want to keep him around, and I would question that resolve, you might want to hit the gym a bit harder and start buying more revealing clothes. Let's hope, for your sake, that he keeps his dick in his pants.
werd
Joined: Feb 2002
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Originally Posted by inkonspikuos
we began talking about our realationship. All I remember about the conversation is that he said that I was not the prettiest girlfriend he has had.
Go Giants
Joined: Aug 2004
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From: PA
Originally Posted by eclipse23
Define beautful.
~Da Nocturnal Cheetah~
Joined: Aug 2006
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From: Germantown, MD
Being the prettiest is not everything anyway. Brings to mind a story…and you know I have them…
I was smashing this hood rat once upon a time. Pretty face, nice body, but they left out the inner beauty, romantic side and seemingly the brain.
One day I was at home chilling, and talking to her on the phone (irrational I know). I was in the mood, so I decided to get a lil kinky with her on the phone:
Her: You like those phone pictures of me huh?
Me: Yeah, send another one.
Her: No. You knew I was gonna say that anyway.
Me: You think I want you to get to the point where you say yes. I want you to get to the point where you initiate it.
Her: What do you mean?
Me: What I mean is one day when I am chilling, out of the blue, I want you to send me something like you laid back on a sofa or the bed, with a sexy lingerie ensemble on or your birthday suit, a vixen-like smile playing across your lips, and a look of hunger in your eyes for what only I can provide, and then a caption that says
Her: (abruptly) WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT???
Me: (sound of record being scratched in my head killing the music) WTF?? Just fucking forget it…moment gone!
See what I mean OP? If the man likes you, appreciate that and stop comparing yourself to others in his past. They are in his past for a reason. Be at peace in your own skin. You don’t need to be the prettiest. If you did, you would not be there. Careful...you may just be the shallow one after all if this irks you too much.
I was smashing this hood rat once upon a time. Pretty face, nice body, but they left out the inner beauty, romantic side and seemingly the brain.
One day I was at home chilling, and talking to her on the phone (irrational I know). I was in the mood, so I decided to get a lil kinky with her on the phone:
Her: You like those phone pictures of me huh?
Me: Yeah, send another one.
Her: No. You knew I was gonna say that anyway.
Me: You think I want you to get to the point where you say yes. I want you to get to the point where you initiate it.
Her: What do you mean?
Me: What I mean is one day when I am chilling, out of the blue, I want you to send me something like you laid back on a sofa or the bed, with a sexy lingerie ensemble on or your birthday suit, a vixen-like smile playing across your lips, and a look of hunger in your eyes for what only I can provide, and then a caption that says
Her: (abruptly) WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT???
Me: (sound of record being scratched in my head killing the music) WTF?? Just fucking forget it…moment gone!
See what I mean OP? If the man likes you, appreciate that and stop comparing yourself to others in his past. They are in his past for a reason. Be at peace in your own skin. You don’t need to be the prettiest. If you did, you would not be there. Careful...you may just be the shallow one after all if this irks you too much.
Registered but harmless
Joined: Aug 2005
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From: Los Angeles, CA
Originally Posted by darksom1
...I was smashing this hood rat once upon a time. Pretty face, nice body, but they left out the inner beauty, romantic side and seemingly the brain...
Me: What I mean is one day when I am chilling, out of the blue, I want you to send me something like you laid back on a sofa or the bed, with a sexy lingerie ensemble on or your birthday suit, a vixen-like smile playing across your lips, and a look of hunger in your eyes for what only I can provide, and then a caption that says
Her: (abruptly) WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT???
Me: (sound of record being scratched in my head killing the music) ...
Me: What I mean is one day when I am chilling, out of the blue, I want you to send me something like you laid back on a sofa or the bed, with a sexy lingerie ensemble on or your birthday suit, a vixen-like smile playing across your lips, and a look of hunger in your eyes for what only I can provide, and then a caption that says
Her: (abruptly) WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT???
Me: (sound of record being scratched in my head killing the music) ...
That type of brainless woman makes my nether regions shrivel-- I used to not even ask out airheaded babes.
My wife isn't the most beautiful (no more than an 8), but she doesn't bark and has a few dozen other attributes that I obviously value.
Senior Moderator
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From: Cleveland area, OH
My wife isn't the most gorgeous woman I ever dated pre-marriage.....but I wouldn't tell her that. That's a romance-killer for sure. I've been with her 13 years because of her brilliant mind.
I don't think the OP has anything to worry about as her SO's already been around for six years....a guy doesn't do that long a relationship without the lady having other attributes than her bod.
I don't think the OP has anything to worry about as her SO's already been around for six years....a guy doesn't do that long a relationship without the lady having other attributes than her bod.
Instructor
Joined: May 2006
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Originally Posted by Ken1997TL
Looks arent everything, they're just the icing on the cake
It's the person, the personality, and the heart of the person, everything else is extra including looks If that was me I would be mad at him for like a day, no dinner, not nothing lol. Then I would get over it, because obviously you had something that he likes. He has stuck with you for 6 years.
yeah i'm bored.
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From: clifton, nj
Definitely a dumb thing to say out loud.
But like all my friends say, you should never marry the hottest girl you've banged.
There might be a few exceptions to that, but for the most part it's seemed to be good advice.
But like all my friends say, you should never marry the hottest girl you've banged.
There might be a few exceptions to that, but for the most part it's seemed to be good advice.
Suzuka Master
Joined: Dec 2005
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My boyfriend said Im a 7 and the best hes been with is a 9.
Theyre just being stupid boys. Make fun of them and then move on. I certainly wouldnt take him too seriously. If youre with him for any length of time, it certainly wont be the worst thing he'll say.
Theyre just being stupid boys. Make fun of them and then move on. I certainly wouldnt take him too seriously. If youre with him for any length of time, it certainly wont be the worst thing he'll say.
~Da Nocturnal Cheetah~
Joined: Aug 2006
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From: Germantown, MD
Ok, you guys are doing that politically correct shit again! Trying to give the right answer and not sound shallow! 
If you are WITH the person, looks shouldn't be everything. But I know damn well you guys are not saying it don't matter if you aren't!
Check this out...you don't know their backgrounds in any of the instances, just their superficial attributes, or lack thereof:
Guys: You walk in the grocery store with the mindset you are looking for a date. Will it be the ugly chick with the beautiful mind and heart in the produce section, or the the nice looking clueless chicks on aisles 3 and 5?
Women: You are in the club with the mindset that maybe some lucky guy will get your number and time tonight. Will it be the nice looking guy with the criminal record as long as the pool stick he's holding, or the ugly guy who does volunteer work and has good credit?
So how do you choose? You most likely choose aesthetics, since that's all you have to go on. How do you know these ugly people are beautiful and/or intelligent inside from across the room? You don't! So stop trying to say the right thing! If you grew up or worked with an ugly person, then ok, I get how you know. But if you just met them and they tried to holla? Get real! If you have to choose someone and you get to choose between 5 people, all equally dressed, and smiling, 3 are attractive, 1 marginal, the last one is ugly, how many of you choose the ugly one or even the marginal one? No one is choosing the ugly one, and only guys with minimal confidence will choose the marginal one first. They may settle for her when they strike out with the attractive chicks, but not first.
It is ok to be attracted to someone on a physical level. It is also ok to NOT be. Chemistry matters, and it starts with what you see because unless you are date shopping online - that's all you have to go on.
Looks don't matter...give me a break...
If you are WITH the person, looks shouldn't be everything. But I know damn well you guys are not saying it don't matter if you aren't!
Check this out...you don't know their backgrounds in any of the instances, just their superficial attributes, or lack thereof:
Guys: You walk in the grocery store with the mindset you are looking for a date. Will it be the ugly chick with the beautiful mind and heart in the produce section, or the the nice looking clueless chicks on aisles 3 and 5?
Women: You are in the club with the mindset that maybe some lucky guy will get your number and time tonight. Will it be the nice looking guy with the criminal record as long as the pool stick he's holding, or the ugly guy who does volunteer work and has good credit?
So how do you choose? You most likely choose aesthetics, since that's all you have to go on. How do you know these ugly people are beautiful and/or intelligent inside from across the room? You don't! So stop trying to say the right thing! If you grew up or worked with an ugly person, then ok, I get how you know. But if you just met them and they tried to holla? Get real! If you have to choose someone and you get to choose between 5 people, all equally dressed, and smiling, 3 are attractive, 1 marginal, the last one is ugly, how many of you choose the ugly one or even the marginal one? No one is choosing the ugly one, and only guys with minimal confidence will choose the marginal one first. They may settle for her when they strike out with the attractive chicks, but not first.
It is ok to be attracted to someone on a physical level. It is also ok to NOT be. Chemistry matters, and it starts with what you see because unless you are date shopping online - that's all you have to go on.
Looks don't matter...give me a break...
Suzuka Master
Joined: Dec 2005
Posts: 5,115
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Originally Posted by darksom1
Ok, you guys are doing that politically correct shit again! Trying to give the right answer and not sound shallow!
If you are WITH the person, looks shouldn't be everything. But I know damn well you guys are not saying it don't matter if you aren't!
Guys: You walk in the grocery store with the mindset you are looking for a date. Will it be the ugly chick with the beautiful mind and heart in the produce section, or the the nice looking clueless chicks on aisles 3 and 5?
Women: You are in the club with the mindset that maybe some lucky guy will get your number and time tonight. Will it be the nice looking guy with the criminal record as long as the pool stick he's holding, or the ugly guy who does volunteer work and has good credit?
Here is the thing...you don't know their backgrounds in any of the instances, just their superficial attributes, or lack thereof. So how do you choose? You most likely choose aesthetics, since that's all you have to go on. How do you know these ugly people are beautiful and/or intelligent inside from across the room? You don't! So stop trying to say the right thing! If you grew up or worked with an ugly person, then ok, I get how you know. But if you just met them and they tried to holla? Get real! If you have to choose someone and you get to choose between 5 people, all equally dressed, and smiling, 3 are attractive, 1 marginal, the last one is ugly, how many of you choose the ugly one or even the marginal one? No one is choosing the ugly one, and only guys with minimal confidence will choose the marginal one first. They may settle for her when they strike out with the attractive chicks, but not first.
It is ok to be attracted to someone on a physical level. It is also ok to NOT be. Chemistry matters, and it starts with what you see because unless you are date shopping online - that's all you have to go on.
Looks don't matter...give me a break...
If you are WITH the person, looks shouldn't be everything. But I know damn well you guys are not saying it don't matter if you aren't!
Guys: You walk in the grocery store with the mindset you are looking for a date. Will it be the ugly chick with the beautiful mind and heart in the produce section, or the the nice looking clueless chicks on aisles 3 and 5?
Women: You are in the club with the mindset that maybe some lucky guy will get your number and time tonight. Will it be the nice looking guy with the criminal record as long as the pool stick he's holding, or the ugly guy who does volunteer work and has good credit?
Here is the thing...you don't know their backgrounds in any of the instances, just their superficial attributes, or lack thereof. So how do you choose? You most likely choose aesthetics, since that's all you have to go on. How do you know these ugly people are beautiful and/or intelligent inside from across the room? You don't! So stop trying to say the right thing! If you grew up or worked with an ugly person, then ok, I get how you know. But if you just met them and they tried to holla? Get real! If you have to choose someone and you get to choose between 5 people, all equally dressed, and smiling, 3 are attractive, 1 marginal, the last one is ugly, how many of you choose the ugly one or even the marginal one? No one is choosing the ugly one, and only guys with minimal confidence will choose the marginal one first. They may settle for her when they strike out with the attractive chicks, but not first.
It is ok to be attracted to someone on a physical level. It is also ok to NOT be. Chemistry matters, and it starts with what you see because unless you are date shopping online - that's all you have to go on.
Looks don't matter...give me a break...
And besides, this isnt about that. This is about her boyfriend being honest and she realizing that it isnt a big deal.
Ive dated guys cuter than my current b/f but they were frickin idiots. Apparently he feels the same.
~Da Nocturnal Cheetah~
Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 6,798
Likes: 4
From: Germantown, MD
Originally Posted by SakiGT
Looks may matter, but it isnt the end all be all.
And besides, this isnt about that. This is about her boyfriend being honest and she realizing that it isnt a big deal.
Ive dated guys cuter than my current b/f but they were frickin idiots. Apparently he feels the same.
And besides, this isnt about that. This is about her boyfriend being honest and she realizing that it isnt a big deal.
Ive dated guys cuter than my current b/f but they were frickin idiots. Apparently he feels the same.
By the way...after you got to know them...how many ugly people became your boyfriend or girlfriend? Any of you? Let me guess...you don't KNOW any ugly people? Hahahahahahaha!
Suzuka Master
Joined: Dec 2005
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Im pretty sure the OP and the boyfriend knows each other fairly well after 6 years.
Lets put your "ugly" question this way - How many people have you thought were either uglier or prettier after getting to know them. Ive met my share of "meh" guys who turn into "hot" after getting to know them.
Lets put your "ugly" question this way - How many people have you thought were either uglier or prettier after getting to know them. Ive met my share of "meh" guys who turn into "hot" after getting to know them.
Originally Posted by SakiGT
Im pretty sure the OP and the boyfriend knows each other fairly well after 6 years.
Lets put your "ugly" question this way - How many people have you thought were either uglier or prettier after getting to know them. Ive met my share of "meh" guys who turn into "hot" after getting to know them.
Lets put your "ugly" question this way - How many people have you thought were either uglier or prettier after getting to know them. Ive met my share of "meh" guys who turn into "hot" after getting to know them.
Your perception of someones beauty or lack of beauty changes a lot after getting to know them. I think that compatability has less to do with initial attraction than we realize.
If I think back on the girls I dated, the couple I called girl friends were the ones I took time to know before giving them that title. The ones I just hooked up with based on attraction were nothing more than hook-ups. I think only one turned into a gf, and I never understood why.
Suzuka Master
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 6,251
Likes: 71
From: D.istrict of C.orruption
Originally Posted by SakiGT
Im pretty sure the OP and the boyfriend knows each other fairly well after 6 years.
Lets put your "ugly" question this way - How many people have you thought were either uglier or prettier after getting to know them. Ive met my share of "meh" guys who turn into "hot" after getting to know them.
Lets put your "ugly" question this way - How many people have you thought were either uglier or prettier after getting to know them. Ive met my share of "meh" guys who turn into "hot" after getting to know them.
I dated a couple of guys like that.
~Da Nocturnal Cheetah~
Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 6,798
Likes: 4
From: Germantown, MD
Originally Posted by SakiGT
Im pretty sure the OP and the boyfriend knows each other fairly well after 6 years.
Lets put your "ugly" question this way - How many people have you thought were either uglier or prettier after getting to know them. Ive met my share of "meh" guys who turn into "hot" after getting to know them.
Lets put your "ugly" question this way - How many people have you thought were either uglier or prettier after getting to know them. Ive met my share of "meh" guys who turn into "hot" after getting to know them.
A woman has to have a good level of intellect to contend with me Saki. I'm passionate as hell (will viciously dig in them guts), fun to be with, absolutely bound to keep you laughing, attractive, just about all that you want from the guy you meet (unless you don't like them 5'7, dark and handsome). But if a woman can't appeal to me mentally, she can be fine as hell, but will be strictly for mashing! So you see, they aren't everything to me either. But they are one hell of a start!