Friend needs advice
Thread Starter
Race Director
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 10,741
Likes: 0
From: Illinois
Friend needs advice
My friend needs advice from me, but I told him that I would get back to him on email.
He tried eharmony and met this great girl he said. Her pics he said of her were from a March 05 pic. When he saw her up close she was a bit bigger than in her pics, but they've gotten along well he told me. He likes everything about her, she has a great personality and is caring. The only trouble is her weight. She is kind of chunky/a few extra pounds.
He told me that he wanted to be honest w/her and told her that he has liked everything about her except her weight. So, she doesn't want to make him embarrassed, so she is working out hard now he told me to get back to her original form that he saw in the pics. He asked her why she got a bit bigger and she told him it was cause she suffered a bad breakup and eating food was her comfort to get rid of the pain.
He asked me if he should stay with her and I told him yes. I mean it may take a few months, but she is a great girl who has motivation and a great personality.
What do you think?
He tried eharmony and met this great girl he said. Her pics he said of her were from a March 05 pic. When he saw her up close she was a bit bigger than in her pics, but they've gotten along well he told me. He likes everything about her, she has a great personality and is caring. The only trouble is her weight. She is kind of chunky/a few extra pounds.
He told me that he wanted to be honest w/her and told her that he has liked everything about her except her weight. So, she doesn't want to make him embarrassed, so she is working out hard now he told me to get back to her original form that he saw in the pics. He asked her why she got a bit bigger and she told him it was cause she suffered a bad breakup and eating food was her comfort to get rid of the pain.
He asked me if he should stay with her and I told him yes. I mean it may take a few months, but she is a great girl who has motivation and a great personality.
What do you think?
Moderator
Joined: Mar 2004
Posts: 9,161
Likes: 58
My advice from another thread:
And people only change when they want to. Changing to make someone else happy or to meet their expectations never really works in the long run.
I just don't see how any woman would value the relationship if she knew that one of the guy's main intentions right from the beginning was to change something about her.....especially something physical (usually a touchy subject) and even something that she might not have a problem with. Hence, the reason I said he doesn't deserve her. She deserves someone who does find her attractive and who can see her for more than just what she weighs.
If she's unhappy with the way she looks or feels about herself, she'll either bring it up herself or do something about it. But my feelings still stand: if you're not attracted to her from the get-go, and cannot look or accept her beyond those physical attributes ---- move on and let her find someone who will drool over her, and search for your 'perfect' woman (apparently not her).
If she's unhappy with the way she looks or feels about herself, she'll either bring it up herself or do something about it. But my feelings still stand: if you're not attracted to her from the get-go, and cannot look or accept her beyond those physical attributes ---- move on and let her find someone who will drool over her, and search for your 'perfect' woman (apparently not her).
Trending Topics
Suzuka Master
Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 7,305
Likes: 20
From: Pacific NW/Federal Way
That is the same problem I have. Since I am an older guy here, the older women tend to be chunky and I can't take that. I believe a woman with a weight problem will always be fighting it.
Disclaimer: nothing wrong with a woman with a few extra lb, but I am not into it.
Disclaimer: nothing wrong with a woman with a few extra lb, but I am not into it.
You want me to break it?
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 2,871
Likes: 0
From: Dallas
Well, she did say that it was a coping mechanism and seems to be agree that she looks differently than she did in the picture she presented so I'd be surprised if she dumped him after losing the weight. That being said, your "friend" is gonna have to hit the gym too if she turns out better than he thought. All in all, your description seems to be of a guy who is into a chick intellectually (maybe emotionally) but just can't get past the physical part - stick it out. One of the blue collar comedians had a show on comedy central recently. He pointed out that you can change pretty much any physical attribute you want with either surgery, dieting, or exercise but you can't fix stupid.
There are alot of hot girls out there, but I'd be surprised if 1 in 10 was worth talking to.
There are alot of hot girls out there, but I'd be surprised if 1 in 10 was worth talking to.
Registered Abuser of VTEC
Joined: May 2004
Posts: 6,542
Likes: 115
From: Edmonton, Alberta
Originally Posted by CKcentral
Maybe he shoudl start getting fit and in shape with her. It would be a nice way to show that he supports her in what she is doing and he'll also be happier about himself too
You take good enough care of yours, but your colleagues are so hot they kinda put some perspective on things
Thread
Thread Starter
Forum
Replies
Last Post
rp_guy
Member Cars for Sale
9
Jul 16, 2017 07:33 AM
soupi
2G TSX Audio, Bluetooth, Electronics & Navigation
14
Nov 15, 2015 11:15 AM