View Poll Results: did TLD do the right thing?
hell yeah, you should never call that girl again
32
86.49%
no, she's shy so you should have called her again
5
13.51%
Voters: 37. You may not vote on this poll
did TLD do the right thing?
#1
did TLD do the right thing?
As you all know, I asked out my shy coworker recently and on the day we were supposed to hang, she told me she was filing her taxes because she needed the money. I have no problem with her cancelling, but my problem is that she waited until I called to cancel. This irresponsbile girl had my number, but she waited for my call which was an hour before our meeting time to cancel and I found that to be rude. She told me to call her and see if she was back in time to salvage the day and I told her no, you have my number, call me if you get back early. Of course, the girl never called and I'm dropping her like a hot potato, but one female friend I spoke to told me I was in the wrong for not calling her back and I told my friend she was totally in the wrong for not calling me ahead of time to cancel. I know for sure that I did the right thing, but why does my ignorant female friend think that I was wrong? What the hell is wrong with some girls?
#3
Now you resent a co-worker. And now you know the beginnings of why you DO NOT SHIT WHERE YOU EAT.
You didnt get a chance to watch it really get messy. Been there, done that....twice, never again.
You didnt get a chance to watch it really get messy. Been there, done that....twice, never again.
#4
Originally Posted by sarlacc23
Now you resent a co-worker. And now you know the beginnings of why you DO NOT SHIT WHERE YOU EAT.
You didnt get a chance to watch it really get messy. Been there, done that....twice, never again.
You didnt get a chance to watch it really get messy. Been there, done that....twice, never again.
In addition, IMO it is pretty reasonable to believe that she may not have been as excited about this date as you were. If she were truely into the date, she wouldnt have cancelled.
Believe what you will, but backing out of a date at the last minute isnt a message worth a 1000 words. Unless grandma died, It's usually only worth 4 - "She aint into it." - no matter what the excuse.
#5
Originally Posted by GoDucksCLSPride
In addition, IMO it is pretty reasonable to believe that she may not have been as excited about this date as you were. If she were truely into the date, she wouldnt have cancelled.
Believe what you will, but backing out of a date at the last minute isnt a message worth a 1000 words. Unless grandma died, It's usually only worth 4 - "She aint into it." - no matter what the excuse.
#6
Originally Posted by GeishaGirl
No idea why she thinks you're wrong It was definitely a rude thing to do, not even bothering to call if she couldn't make it You shouldn't have to chase anyone.
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#8
if there's anything i'm a stickler on, it's phone etiquette. if someone doesn't call me when they say the will, they get cut and i move on. it's pretty obvious when someone doesn't want to put in the effort... and then denies it. it's like, dude, i do the same thing to other guys, i think i can recognize it when you do it to me. this happened to me just recently, so it's got me riled up.
this girl would have, or at least SHOULD have called you earlier that day to cancel-- that is, assuming she cared. but you can take her cue and move on. no loss.
this girl would have, or at least SHOULD have called you earlier that day to cancel-- that is, assuming she cared. but you can take her cue and move on. no loss.
#9
one more thing...
Originally Posted by Batin Dean
I read this girl's body language and demeanor very well; she wasn't not into me as you say, she wanted me to chase her so she played the ever so stupid, let me test him to see how much he'll chase me game.
oh and if a girl really likes a guy, she won't pull a stupid stunt like almost standing him up.
#10
I'll chime in real quick with some dating advice.
A first date should be during the week. That way there's no pressure. Something fun and light like grabbing appetizers or cocktails/wine. Allowing you to get to know each other. Then maybe 2nd or 3rd date could be on the weekend, with firm plans and a time.
Movies for a first date are a bad move IMHO, you don't really get to know each other and aren't able to talk...no chance for a spark.
So that's all I'm gonna say. She probably thought "gee I could go out with my friends or sit in a theater with a guy I barely know twidling my thumbs"
Also some women just don't call guys. Its how they were brought up by their parents "girls don't call boys" - I've seen it all the time. Doesn't mean they are rude, just how they play the game.
A first date should be during the week. That way there's no pressure. Something fun and light like grabbing appetizers or cocktails/wine. Allowing you to get to know each other. Then maybe 2nd or 3rd date could be on the weekend, with firm plans and a time.
Movies for a first date are a bad move IMHO, you don't really get to know each other and aren't able to talk...no chance for a spark.
So that's all I'm gonna say. She probably thought "gee I could go out with my friends or sit in a theater with a guy I barely know twidling my thumbs"
Also some women just don't call guys. Its how they were brought up by their parents "girls don't call boys" - I've seen it all the time. Doesn't mean they are rude, just how they play the game.
#11
Originally Posted by spidey07
Also some women just don't call guys. Its how they were brought up by their parents "girls don't call boys" - I've seen it all the time. Doesn't mean they are rude, just how they play the game.
#12
she sounds pretty emotionless...especially towards you. I don't think she really cared if she went out with you or not. Those types of women only have one chance to pull a stunt like wait for me to call her for her to cancel on me. Who does she think she is. She really has some nerve.
That's when the "B" word would have slipped out of my mouth...sorry, but i'm upset for you, Batin.
Next time you see her at work and you pass her in the hallway, act like she doesn't exist because you obviously don't exist to her. I really despise women who are ignorant enough to play stupid games like that. Move on Batin.
Oh yeah, if you have to work so hard to get someone to notice you, she's definitely not worth it.
"She told me to call her and see if she was back in time to salvage the day..."
Next time you see her at work and you pass her in the hallway, act like she doesn't exist because you obviously don't exist to her. I really despise women who are ignorant enough to play stupid games like that. Move on Batin.
Oh yeah, if you have to work so hard to get someone to notice you, she's definitely not worth it.
Last edited by MisterMehoff; 02-08-2005 at 12:11 PM.
#13
Originally Posted by mfkitson
She always has a good reasonable outlook. I wish all women (and men for that matter) were like her....
Originally Posted by Batin Dean
Geisha, why can't all my female friends be as smart as you?
I agree that she should have called. I don't buy that chicks don't call guys thing either. What if you hadn't called and just waited at the place you were supposed to meet? I don't know if you had an actual plan on where to meet etc, but still when you make plans with someone there is the assumption that there is actually a plan. The point being that the other person has cleared some of their personal time so that they can spend it with you. It is unacceptable and of course rude to wait until the last moment to cancel. The other person could have been doing something else instead of getting ready/waiting for your ass
#14
from the sounds of it your a little bit of a player batin
so here is the thing. She wants to know how serious you are about her. Give her one more call if you like her, easy date like spidey said and nothing none to real. Maybe a date where you and friends go out with her and her friends. but if it's not rollin don't worry or get mad. As they said in the 80's "girl do go away mad, girl just go away" (god who was that?????)
so here is the thing. She wants to know how serious you are about her. Give her one more call if you like her, easy date like spidey said and nothing none to real. Maybe a date where you and friends go out with her and her friends. but if it's not rollin don't worry or get mad. As they said in the 80's "girl do go away mad, girl just go away" (god who was that?????)
#17
update
I saw the girl at work and she was apologizing and seemed remorseful. I told her not to worry about it, you had to do your taxes, it's ok. She felt even more guilty. I saw her again a couple of hours later and she was apologizing again. I told her we should talk so we're gonna talk in private when our nosey coworkers aren't watching us and giggling. Let's see what happens.
#18
Hopefully when you talk in private, you can tell her that you felt like it was a waste of time for you to talk to her if she can just blow you off like that...Then let her jiggle your balls in her mouth.
#20
Originally Posted by Batin Dean
I saw the girl at work and she was apologizing and seemed remorseful. I told her not to worry about it, you had to do your taxes, it's ok. She felt even more guilty. I saw her again a couple of hours later and she was apologizing again. I told her we should talk so we're gonna talk in private when our nosey coworkers aren't watching us and giggling. Let's see what happens.
oh man, right when i thought the story was going to drift away...A TWIST
I can't wait to hear the exciting conclusion of the dominican crusades of TLD
#21
Originally Posted by Batin Dean
I saw the girl at work and she was apologizing and seemed remorseful. I told her not to worry about it, you had to do your taxes, it's ok. She felt even more guilty. I saw her again a couple of hours later and she was apologizing again. I told her we should talk so we're gonna talk in private when our nosey coworkers aren't watching us and giggling. Let's see what happens.
#23
Pro
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 652
Likes: 2
From: Edison, NJ
Yes, that was rude of her to do...but then again we don't know her reasons, so let's not judge too quickly...let's give her the benefit of the doubt and hear her explanation...then we'll decide whether to let her be or go out with her...
however, just in general, i don't think it's a wise decision to date someone who you work with...it just becomes too complicating and you get flashbacks and stuff...what was that statement that someone said before....ummm...don't shit where you eat, hahaha...ya, that basically covers it up lol
however, just in general, i don't think it's a wise decision to date someone who you work with...it just becomes too complicating and you get flashbacks and stuff...what was that statement that someone said before....ummm...don't shit where you eat, hahaha...ya, that basically covers it up lol
#24
Originally Posted by Jinen
Yes, that was rude of her to do...but then again we don't know her reasons, so let's not judge too quickly...let's give her the benefit of the doubt and hear her explanation...then we'll decide whether to let her be or go out with her...
I thought the reason was that she had to do her taxes. Even if she needed to do them, she should have called him as soon as she knew so he could have made other plans. Its not like she was dying in a hospital somewhere or couldn't get to a phone. If she had a real reason for pulling a bitch move she should have said something about it so there wouldn't be this kind of misunderstanding. IMO it was an inconsiderate move all around Good luck with that one though Dean, let us know if she redeems herself somehow
#25
Originally Posted by sarlacc23
Now you resent a co-worker. And now you know the beginnings of why you DO NOT SHIT WHERE YOU EAT.
#26
Originally Posted by GeishaGirl
I thought the reason was that she had to do her taxes. Even if she needed to do them, she should have called him as soon as she knew so he could have made other plans. Its not like she was dying in a hospital somewhere or couldn't get to a phone. If she had a real reason for pulling a bitch move she should have said something about it so there wouldn't be this kind of misunderstanding. IMO it was an inconsiderate move all around Good luck with that one though Dean, let us know if she redeems herself somehow
#27
Originally Posted by Batin Dean
Geisha, you should be the voice of reason for women everywhere. Tell those women to stop pulling bitch moves.
btw what did she have to say when you two got to talk in private?
#28
Originally Posted by Batin Dean
Geisha, you should be the voice of reason for women everywhere. Tell those women to stop pulling bitch moves.
oh but seriously. any woman who wants to go out on a date, will put their damn taxes off.
oh id love to go out on a date with you but.. oh i think i need a tooth pulled. call later.
taxes?! lame.
#33
Originally Posted by TLover
Why is it that the so-called Love Doctor asks more questions on here than anyone else?
#34
Originally Posted by Batin Dean
OMG, if you only knew how many pm's I get from guys asking for dating advice. I never reveal who they are out of respect for their privacy, but if any of them wanted to step up for TLD, they'll do it on their own without any coersion from me. I help younger guys go through many of the trials and tribulations of dating that TLD went through, but I'm only human and I run into games and conflicts occasionally too.
once again, did you name yourself the love doctor? just cuz people pm you for some strange reason doesnt mean you know what to do in woman situations
i just want to know how the whole "im the love doctor" thing started
#35
Originally Posted by nokio
once again, did you name yourself the love doctor? just cuz people pm you for some strange reason doesnt mean you know what to do in woman situations
i just want to know how the whole "im the love doctor" thing started
i just want to know how the whole "im the love doctor" thing started
advice thread
Last edited by Batin Dean; 02-10-2005 at 11:16 PM.
#36
Originally Posted by Batin Dean
#37
Originally Posted by TLover
Then why can't you solve/answer your own problems/questions?
#38
if i need advice ill send a letter to dear abby thank you very much most others dont seem to take you seriously either
sorry for raining on your parade...but i know people who think like you (in that they can solve other peoples issues, and take it upon themselves to do so because they are so 'great' at something) and they are just lost
sorry for raining on your parade...but i know people who think like you (in that they can solve other peoples issues, and take it upon themselves to do so because they are so 'great' at something) and they are just lost
Last edited by nokio; 02-11-2005 at 04:31 AM.
#39
It's ok though I talk on here. But I am not "the love Doctor", or anywhere nere that. Take my advice, threw it out the window. whatever, it's a board not the help desk of I know everything. I understand where you come from on this batin.
#40
Originally Posted by GeishaGirl
Sometimes its good to have an outside opinion When you're too close to the situation the mind can get clouded and its hard to see things clearly. Kind of like how people can give others really good advice, but in their own situations they don't practice what they preach.