Becoming more than just frined
07-16-2012, 10:26 PM
#122
Senior Moderator
Don't listen to the crabs Justn. They aren't really your frineds.
The following users liked this post:
97BlackAckCL (07-17-2012)
07-17-2012, 08:27 AM
#123
Senior Moderator
Regional Coordinator
(Mid-Atlantic)
Regional Coordinator
(Mid-Atlantic)
iTrader: (6)
So did the OP become more than frineds yet? 
07-21-2012, 03:00 PM
#124
what a coincidence I'm also a girl. I can't prove it but it doesn't matter. Trade pics? s2r.
Not sure if zooming in on you pitching a tent is really "ambiguous". Maybe if you sent her the pic, followed with a text saying "I accidentally took 2, and it says if it lasts over 4 hours to call a doctor. Know anyone?"
I tried it.. she was pretty shocked. I actually had to grab her hand to make the high-5 happen. I'm hoping she takes the next step. I might send her a text of my penis bulge in a few days if she doesn't get back to me. I'll say something like.. Do these jeans look okay? So the sexual nature will be ambiguous.
07-24-2012, 11:50 AM
#125
Sorry about the late reply, work has me traveling a lot during the summer. And last week I was working on my TL (will be posting pics in the 4G section soon). I'll answer some of the posts and at the bottom I'll tell ya'll what I ended up doing.
I saw Friend Zone recently too, all of those kids got rejected (I laughed until I realized I was in a similar plight). I can see how that would work, but I felt like I should get it all out there now just to see.
It's pretty hard since I have very little of that
I'm working on it I guess, just doesn't come naturally to me like it does for you all I guess
Yeah, I was kind of hoping there was something, b/c why else would she be willing to talk to me so often? Nah, I don't think I send of the creeper vibe. Flirting is hard for me, but I do try when we talk (who knows how it ends up sounding though).
With this post, I'll go ahead and just tell the story now. So I ended up calling her last weekend. We had our normal conversation and then I just kinda manned up and told her that I liked her as more then just a friend. So she kinda jokes about how I should have told her to sit down, but then she goes on and says at one point a few years back she did like me a lot. But now the way we are, I was in the friend zone (yes, she said friend zone). But it didn't get weird, we just moved on to another conversation topic. But right near the end, she brings up the fact that when I do find a girlfriend, she's gonna be really lucky. So I don't know why she mentioned that, unless it was to concrete the fact that we wouldn't end up together? I was pretty disappointed, but not emo or anything.
Now I called her this weekend and we had a normal conversation, mainly about summer movies, no reference to the week before. So I think things are normal?
My question now is, what do I do next? I still like her, but do you all think I don't have a chance anymore? Or should I just try to push forward with her slowly (flirting, etc). Maybe move on, and re-visit her later, I dunno
I know you guys don't know me that well, or my friend for that matter. But I do appreciate the input...thanks!
Meh, if I was in this situation (never been, so maybe I should stfu) I personally would just start kind of warming up to her, see how she reacts and just gauge it as I go. I saw an episode of that lol-tastic show on MTV "Friend Zone" and they get rejected like half the time. IMO one reason for that is because they really spring it all on them at once. Best idea is to up the kind of "not just a friend" behavior. Like maybe "accidentally" brush up against her titties or something like that. Make her go home thinking "I'm wondering if he likes me more than I thought" so that way she has an opportunity to kind of sit on it for a bit and consider it. Give her some time and space to think about it. But definitely be ambiguous about it. So that way if she doesn't react favorably, it'll be easier for you to retain a friendship.
IMO springing it all on her at once will only result in an impulse reaction, which is what you don't really want.
IMO springing it all on her at once will only result in an impulse reaction, which is what you don't really want.
It's pretty hard since I have very little of that
I'm working on it I guess, just doesn't come naturally to me like it does for you all I guessI'd have to agree about the phone-ship. I wouldn't continue a friendship over the phone unless i enjoyed speaking with you. I wouldnt tell her over the phone how you feel either... that may be a little too much being you dont know where she stands. I would def ask her to hangout! and also maybe even flirt a little, but dont come off as a creep lol then you may send the wrong vibes and be in another zone you dont want to be in haha
With this post, I'll go ahead and just tell the story now. So I ended up calling her last weekend. We had our normal conversation and then I just kinda manned up and told her that I liked her as more then just a friend. So she kinda jokes about how I should have told her to sit down, but then she goes on and says at one point a few years back she did like me a lot. But now the way we are, I was in the friend zone (yes, she said friend zone). But it didn't get weird, we just moved on to another conversation topic. But right near the end, she brings up the fact that when I do find a girlfriend, she's gonna be really lucky. So I don't know why she mentioned that, unless it was to concrete the fact that we wouldn't end up together? I was pretty disappointed, but not emo or anything.
Now I called her this weekend and we had a normal conversation, mainly about summer movies, no reference to the week before. So I think things are normal?
My question now is, what do I do next? I still like her, but do you all think I don't have a chance anymore? Or should I just try to push forward with her slowly (flirting, etc). Maybe move on, and re-visit her later, I dunno
I know you guys don't know me that well, or my friend for that matter. But I do appreciate the input...thanks!
07-24-2012, 11:59 AM
#127
Senior Moderator
Regional Coordinator
(Mid-Atlantic)
Regional Coordinator
(Mid-Atlantic)
iTrader: (6)
Welcome to the friends zone, you are there to stay
07-24-2012, 12:09 PM
#128
Giant Blue Car
That's gotta be really disappointing. I'm sorry!
I wouldn't attempt to say or try anything further; if you do, she'll most likely start pulling back to the point where she won't talk to you.
I know it sucks, but just keep everything how it is now...in the Friends Zone.
I wouldn't attempt to say or try anything further; if you do, she'll most likely start pulling back to the point where she won't talk to you.
I know it sucks, but just keep everything how it is now...in the Friends Zone.
07-24-2012, 12:16 PM
#130
haha at least its familiar!
No, I'll probably never try it again. I guess my current course of action is stay as-is and just try to make it more. We'll see.
Save it and sleep with her? Yeah, doubt that's gonna happen lol You know, for the longest time, I didn't even notice her (sexually). But when it hit me that I liked her, I was like "holy crap, she's gorgeous!"
07-24-2012, 12:24 PM
#131
Senior Moderator
Regional Coordinator
(Mid-Atlantic)
Regional Coordinator
(Mid-Atlantic)
iTrader: (6)
If she's in Pittsburgh, give me her number, I'll have a talk with her 
07-24-2012, 02:24 PM
#132
Old Man Yelling at Clouds
I was pretty disappointed, but not emo or anything.
Now I called her this weekend and we had a normal conversation, mainly about summer movies, no reference to the week before. So I think things are normal?
My question now is, what do I do next? I still like her, but do you all think I don't have a chance anymore? Or should I just try to push forward with her slowly (flirting, etc). Maybe move on, and re-visit her later, I dunno
I know you guys don't know me that well, or my friend for that matter. But I do appreciate the input...thanks!
Now I called her this weekend and we had a normal conversation, mainly about summer movies, no reference to the week before. So I think things are normal?
My question now is, what do I do next? I still like her, but do you all think I don't have a chance anymore? Or should I just try to push forward with her slowly (flirting, etc). Maybe move on, and re-visit her later, I dunno
I know you guys don't know me that well, or my friend for that matter. But I do appreciate the input...thanks!
You'll like someone else soon enough, and she'll like you, and all will be well. But don't waste a minite of your time or energy on this on, short of what you do as friends.
The following 2 users liked this post by 1Louder:
Aman (07-26-2012),
justnspace (07-24-2012)
07-24-2012, 02:37 PM
#133
Old Man Yelling at Clouds
I'm stealing this from the girlfriend gone thread. Do this. 
Thanks justnspace!
Thanks justnspace!^you should have just quoted the movie swingers. it would have gotten your point across better.
Mike: Okay, so what if I don't want to give up on her?
Rob: You don't call.
Mike: But you said I don't call if I wanted to give up on her.
Rob: Right.
Mike: So I don't call either way?
Rob: Right.
Mike: So what's the difference?
Rob: There is no difference right now. See, Mike, the only difference between giving up and not giving up is if you take her back when she wants to come back. But you can't do anything to make her want to come back. In fact, you can only do stuff to make her not want to come back.
Mike: So the only difference is if I forget about her or just pretend to forget about her?
Rob: Right.
Mike: Well that sucks.
Rob: Yeah, it sucks.
Mike: So it's just like a retroactive decision, then? I mean I could, like, forget about her and then when she comes back make like I just pretended to forget about her?
Rob: Right. Although probably more likely the opposite.
Mike: What do you mean?
Rob: I mean at first you're going to pretend to forget about her, you'll not call her, I don't know, whatever... but then eventually, you really will forget about her.
Mike: Well what if she comes back first?
Rob: Mmmm... see, that's the thing, is somehow they know not to come back until you really forget.
Mike: There's the rub.
Rob: There's the rub.
Mike: Okay, so what if I don't want to give up on her?
Rob: You don't call.
Mike: But you said I don't call if I wanted to give up on her.
Rob: Right.
Mike: So I don't call either way?
Rob: Right.
Mike: So what's the difference?
Rob: There is no difference right now. See, Mike, the only difference between giving up and not giving up is if you take her back when she wants to come back. But you can't do anything to make her want to come back. In fact, you can only do stuff to make her not want to come back.
Mike: So the only difference is if I forget about her or just pretend to forget about her?
Rob: Right.
Mike: Well that sucks.
Rob: Yeah, it sucks.
Mike: So it's just like a retroactive decision, then? I mean I could, like, forget about her and then when she comes back make like I just pretended to forget about her?
Rob: Right. Although probably more likely the opposite.
Mike: What do you mean?
Rob: I mean at first you're going to pretend to forget about her, you'll not call her, I don't know, whatever... but then eventually, you really will forget about her.
Mike: Well what if she comes back first?
Rob: Mmmm... see, that's the thing, is somehow they know not to come back until you really forget.
Mike: There's the rub.
Rob: There's the rub.
The following 2 users liked this post by 1Louder:
Catfisha (07-24-2012),
justnspace (07-24-2012)
07-24-2012, 05:03 PM
#136
Sorry dude, but it's happened to everyone, so don't get hung up on it. You should be proud of yourself for asking. A lot of guys would never build up the courage.
I don't know if you're a baseball fan, but when a closer blows a save, they always say you have to have a short memory or else you'll never succeed, and that applies here as well. Maybe a bad analogy, but whatever
It's pretty hard since I have very little of that I'm working on it I guess, just doesn't come naturally to me like it does for you all I guess
While some of it may be natural, the majority of it is practice. Simple as that. Do you have any friends that are good at this? Hang around with them more and learn from it. My brother is 4 years older than me, so growing up hanging out with him and his friends, I was constantly getting advice, specifically "if I knew then what I know now" advice, which was very helpful.
Yeah, I was kind of hoping there was something, b/c why else would she be willing to talk to me so often?
You're a good friend
Look on the bright side, girls are always trying to hook up their female friends with good guys. It's not a bad thing at all. Just don't blow it now by being a creeper after she rejected you.
But right near the end, she brings up the fact that when I do find a girlfriend, she's gonna be really lucky. So I don't know why she mentioned that, unless it was to concrete the fact that we wouldn't end up together?
Addressed above by Louder.
My question now is, what do I do next? I still like her, but do you all think I don't have a chance anymore? Or should I just try to push forward with her slowly (flirting, etc). Maybe move on, and re-visit her later, I dunno
I know you guys don't know me that well, or my friend for that matter. But I do appreciate the input...thanks!
Also addresses very well by Louder. I wouldn't bother trying. There's a slight chance something could happen in a few years, but doubtful, so don't try unless she starts giving you hints. Long story short, you simply missed your chance.
I don't know if you're a baseball fan, but when a closer blows a save, they always say you have to have a short memory or else you'll never succeed, and that applies here as well. Maybe a bad analogy, but whatever
It's pretty hard since I have very little of that
I'm working on it I guess, just doesn't come naturally to me like it does for you all I guessWhile some of it may be natural, the majority of it is practice. Simple as that. Do you have any friends that are good at this? Hang around with them more and learn from it. My brother is 4 years older than me, so growing up hanging out with him and his friends, I was constantly getting advice, specifically "if I knew then what I know now" advice, which was very helpful.
Yeah, I was kind of hoping there was something, b/c why else would she be willing to talk to me so often?
You're a good friend
Look on the bright side, girls are always trying to hook up their female friends with good guys. It's not a bad thing at all. Just don't blow it now by being a creeper after she rejected you.But right near the end, she brings up the fact that when I do find a girlfriend, she's gonna be really lucky. So I don't know why she mentioned that, unless it was to concrete the fact that we wouldn't end up together?
Addressed above by Louder.
My question now is, what do I do next? I still like her, but do you all think I don't have a chance anymore? Or should I just try to push forward with her slowly (flirting, etc). Maybe move on, and re-visit her later, I dunno
I know you guys don't know me that well, or my friend for that matter. But I do appreciate the input...thanks!
Also addresses very well by Louder. I wouldn't bother trying. There's a slight chance something could happen in a few years, but doubtful, so don't try unless she starts giving you hints. Long story short, you simply missed your chance.
07-25-2012, 12:02 AM
#137
Advanced
With this post, I'll go ahead and just tell the story now. So I ended up calling her last weekend. We had our normal conversation and then I just kinda manned up and told her that I liked her as more then just a friend. So she kinda jokes about how I should have told her to sit down, but then she goes on and says at one point a few years back she did like me a lot. But now the way we are, I was in the friend zone (yes, she said friend zone). But it didn't get weird, we just moved on to another conversation topic. But right near the end, she brings up the fact that when I do find a girlfriend, she's gonna be really lucky. So I don't know why she mentioned that, unless it was to concrete the fact that we wouldn't end up together? I was pretty disappointed, but not emo or anything.
Now I called her this weekend and we had a normal conversation, mainly about summer movies, no reference to the week before. So I think things are normal?
My question now is, what do I do next? I still like her, but do you all think I don't have a chance anymore? Or should I just try to push forward with her slowly (flirting, etc). Maybe move on, and re-visit her later, I dunno
I know you guys don't know me that well, or my friend for that matter. But I do appreciate the input...thanks!
... if she didnt like what you said to her a week earlier she definitely would have ignored your phonecall, or at least kind of backed off a little. Being that she made nothing of it... To me it sounds like she likes that you have some sort of feeling towards her and your boosting her ego but she doesnt want you to get the feeling she's just as into you so she built that friend zone wall. It's like she's sending you mixed signals...
The following users liked this post:
97BlackAckCL (07-25-2012)
07-25-2012, 07:56 AM
#139
Senior Moderator
Regional Coordinator
(Mid-Atlantic)
Regional Coordinator
(Mid-Atlantic)
iTrader: (6)
... if she didnt like what you said to her a week earlier she definitely would have ignored your phonecall, or at least kind of backed off a little. Being that she made nothing of it... To me it sounds like she likes that you have some sort of feeling towards her and your boosting her ego but she doesnt want you to get the feeling she's just as into you so she built that friend zone wall. It's like she's sending you mixed signals...
07-25-2012, 09:16 AM
#140
Old Man Yelling at Clouds
... if she didnt like what you said to her a week earlier she definitely would have ignored your phonecall, or at least kind of backed off a little. Being that she made nothing of it... To me it sounds like she likes that you have some sort of feeling towards her and your boosting her ego but she doesnt want you to get the feeling she's just as into you so she built that friend zone wall. It's like she's sending you mixed signals...
The following users liked this post:
justnspace (07-25-2012)
07-25-2012, 09:59 AM
#141
Drifting
I said it before earlier in this thread - you're already in the friend zone, behind a one way door. you have zero chance of being with her, short of you getting a few rounds of hard liquor in her.
at this point, all you're doing is stroking her ego and digging a deeper hole than what you started in. take everyone's advice, forget this chick and find a new one. life's too short to spend trying to get with someone who doesnt even remotely want to be with you.
Id advise against trying to be a friend because she knows you have the hots for her and she will always use that on you. She'll get you to do favors and stuff. you say she won't take advantage of you now, but trust me, its best you move on.
at this point, all you're doing is stroking her ego and digging a deeper hole than what you started in. take everyone's advice, forget this chick and find a new one. life's too short to spend trying to get with someone who doesnt even remotely want to be with you.
Id advise against trying to be a friend because she knows you have the hots for her and she will always use that on you. She'll get you to do favors and stuff. you say she won't take advantage of you now, but trust me, its best you move on.
07-25-2012, 10:52 AM
#142
Chapter Leader (Southern Region)
OP, plan a slumber party.. because that's what besties do... play dress-up, do outfits of the day/night/week.. talk about what make-up routine you do. Make sure you talk about tinted moisturizers and ask what SPF is hers, and discuss that article you read in Lucky about UV skin damage.
Then.. when you guys go to sleep, say "let's cuddle!" But don't be creepy about it.. say it with a smile and enthusiasm. Then when you're cuddling.. you'll get wood. If not, you're gay, the plan ends here.
When you get wood, assuming not gay, say.. "oops.. I guess I'm really comfortable"... wait a couple minutes and grind your hips a bit so the wood rubs her kitty.. then ask / whisper.. "Can I put the head in?" if she says idk.. insist it will just be the head.
Make sure to pull out and BLT. You're welcome.
Last edited by Majofo; 07-25-2012 at 10:54 AM.
The following 2 users liked this post by Majofo:
iSeeYouTwo (07-27-2012),
TLDude876 (08-05-2012)
07-25-2012, 11:58 AM
#144
Senior Moderator
Regional Coordinator
(Mid-Atlantic)
Regional Coordinator
(Mid-Atlantic)
iTrader: (6)
Majofo
07-25-2012, 12:24 PM
#145
Giant Blue Car
OP, plan a slumber party.. because that's what besties do... play dress-up, do outfits of the day/night/week.. talk about what make-up routine you do. Make sure you talk about tinted moisturizers and ask what SPF is hers, and discuss that article you read in Lucky about UV skin damage.
Then.. when you guys go to sleep, say "let's cuddle!" But don't be creepy about it.. say it with a smile and enthusiasm. Then when you're cuddling.. you'll get wood. If not, you're gay, the plan ends here.
When you get wood, assuming not gay, say.. "oops.. I guess I'm really comfortable"... wait a couple minutes and grind your hips a bit so the wood rubs her kitty.. then ask / whisper.. "Can I put the head in?" if she says idk.. insist it will just be the head.
Make sure to pull out and BLT. You're welcome.
Then.. when you guys go to sleep, say "let's cuddle!" But don't be creepy about it.. say it with a smile and enthusiasm. Then when you're cuddling.. you'll get wood. If not, you're gay, the plan ends here.
When you get wood, assuming not gay, say.. "oops.. I guess I'm really comfortable"... wait a couple minutes and grind your hips a bit so the wood rubs her kitty.. then ask / whisper.. "Can I put the head in?" if she says idk.. insist it will just be the head.
Make sure to pull out and BLT. You're welcome.
You should write adult novels!!!
07-25-2012, 12:35 PM
#146
Senior Moderator
Regional Coordinator
(Mid-Atlantic)
Regional Coordinator
(Mid-Atlantic)
iTrader: (6)
"Just the Tip" Written by Joe Majofo
07-25-2012, 01:07 PM
#147
Chapter Leader (Southern Region)
07-25-2012, 02:42 PM
#148
Giant Blue Car
What made that short story so true to life was the "cuddling" part. That's, I think, a typical guy move!
The attention to subject matter in regards to the "slumber party" was excellently written!
The attention to subject matter in regards to the "slumber party" was excellently written!
07-25-2012, 03:05 PM
#149
Majofo, you are giving the male members a rise. Stop it. This thread scares me.
And the OP, we feel for ya
And the OP, we feel for ya
07-25-2012, 03:06 PM
#150
07-25-2012, 03:31 PM
#152
Chapter Leader (Southern Region)
I know women. 
no.. Majofo is not Mel Gibson.
no.. Majofo is not Mel Gibson.
07-25-2012, 03:33 PM
#153
Chapter Leader (Southern Region)
Men too.. 
Not like McFly.
Not like McFly.
07-25-2012, 09:13 PM
#156
Senior Moderator
Regional Coordinator
(Mid-Atlantic)
Regional Coordinator
(Mid-Atlantic)
iTrader: (6)
07-25-2012, 09:31 PM
#157
OP, plan a slumber party.. because that's what besties do... play dress-up, do outfits of the day/night/week.. talk about what make-up routine you do. Make sure you talk about tinted moisturizers and ask what SPF is hers, and discuss that article you read in Lucky about UV skin damage.
Then.. when you guys go to sleep, say "let's cuddle!" But don't be creepy about it.. say it with a smile and enthusiasm. Then when you're cuddling.. you'll get wood. If not, you're gay, the plan ends here.
When you get wood, assuming not gay, say.. "oops.. I guess I'm really comfortable"... wait a couple minutes and grind your hips a bit so the wood rubs her kitty.. then ask / whisper.. "Can I put the head in?" if she says idk.. insist it will just be the head.
Make sure to pull out and BLT. You're welcome.
The following users liked this post:
97BlackAckCL (07-26-2012)
07-26-2012, 03:54 PM
#159
Chapter Leader (Southern Region)
The following users liked this post:
leedogg (07-28-2012)
07-26-2012, 03:58 PM
#160
OP step your game up next time you and her hang out.
When you are out in any public setting, if you're reeking with confidence than other girls around you will start checking you out while you're around her. Trust me, she will notice the other girls checking you out. This will make her want you more.
Wear your favorite shirt, get a hair cut, etc. Do whatever that will make you feel confident and feel good about yourself.
^This!
When you are out in any public setting, if you're reeking with confidence than other girls around you will start checking you out while you're around her. Trust me, she will notice the other girls checking you out. This will make her want you more.
Wear your favorite shirt, get a hair cut, etc. Do whatever that will make you feel confident and feel good about yourself.
^This!