so I was going home from my fiancee's house so i was running about 55-60 mph down 201 Northbound because I was going to get gas. I had about 1/4 tank of gas. this is hilly part of Miami county. so I'm going through the hills. There's the new deep red F-150(04 or 05) sitting at the edge of this guys driveway. no one behind me for a good mile. so i figured he'd backout after i went through. he starts backing out onto 201 right before I come through(he's in my lane sideways) as I'm coming through. keep in mind i'm doing about 55 mph. by the time i see him. i locked down the brakes go into a 4 wheel drift. i had to go around him because if i didn't i would have got his rear end. so I'm blowing my horn as this is all going on. I gave him the finger. plus there's another hill he floors his F-150 so i'm on the wrong side of the road so i can't get around him. there's a car coming over the hill. i had the accord about at 3/4's power i mat the gas and say F--K IT . i get in front of him. he's flipping me off. right on my back bumper. so we get up to the next stop sign. and he has his brights on and still on my butt. I get out of my car.
he gets out his shitty F-150. keep in mind i'm 6 ft 4 weigh 235 lbs and i deadlift 400 lbs and i've grown up on a farm. so i'm pretty strong.this guy about 60-65 and maybe 5 ft 8 and 175 lbs had to have like 3-4 teeth in his entire mouth smelled like ass.
him:I'll kick your big ass you mother f--ker.
me:dude what's your problem? you almost hit me as i was coming over that hill
him: you were speeding over that hill.
me:really do you have a radar gun.
him:no.
me:i didn't think so . so how do you know I was speeding.
him: i could tell you were doing like 80.
melaughing) dude i was doing about 55 mph.
him:well that's too fast
melaughing) whats the speed limit through there
him: 55 mph
me:then shut the f--k up and quit giving me shit.
him: you sure don't know how to drive. you need to learn some traffic laws.
me: dude you're the one that almost him me you would have been found at fault.If i didn't have good driving skills and knowledge what my car can and can't do you'd be buying this car.
him: no i wouldn't
me:yeah you would because you'd be at fault ass.
him: get in your ricer Piece of shit and get the hell out of hell
me: whatever needle dick.
then i left.

 

Southern rednecks are much cooler than northern rednecks.

Funny story though.

 

old men from Ohio in backwoods countys dont know the term ricer.

 

BS.

 

 

That story is funnier than you could ever imagine Derrick

 

Couldn't you have enhanced teh ending for effect...anticlimactic.




btw - domn is not a redneck...tsk.

 

cliff notes

 

6.5/10

 

A bat to the head somewhere in the story would have been better.

 

haha u guys got out of the cars and bullshitted about the speed limit.

 

sounds like the needle dick pickup truck owners up here, assholes

 

How about we make up and ending for this story to make it more fun. The only rule is it has to contain the words "like", "squeel" and "pig".