Hot idea to slow down your buddies and other drivers – the handicapper kit. This kit is great for parents with drive-on-two-wheel kids, four-wheel-drift-kids, racers, and others who want to drive your CLS at insane speeds. It also will help you compete, if you have flat tires, but still want to race.


For only $699.99 you get the following items.


Heavy depleted Uranium 20” wheels with super slick, MXM4 215/20S-20 rubber tires (Bridgestone Impotenza T20s optional).
A high temp 12-volt blow dryer – forced air supply. (HAI – Hot Air Intake)
Exhaust restrictor with lock. (HRE – High Restriction Exhaust)


Details:


The 20” wheels are made from depleted Uranium tank rounds removed from Iraqi tanks. Thanks to the Gulf War, we are getting a special deal on this exotic substance. The four wheels weigh 300lbs each and come with super slick MXM rubber tires in a 215/20 format. Speed rating is good for 88 miles per hour. DynoJet tests have shown an "effective" HP at the rear wheels of only 50 HP using these wheels!

The HAI is comprised of a 2000-watt (12 volt 200 amp) hot air blower connected to the stock air intake or CAI. This device guarantees a constant 140-degree flow of hot air to the intake. It is like bringing the Sahara or Death Valley to your intake.

The HRE is a locking exhaust restrictor designed to increase backpressure and reduce gas flow. This device comes with a lock designed to shunt the exhaust by closing down from 1” to 0.1”. This device comes as 2 pieces for the Acura CL-S. All’s we can say is, "There is a new banana-in-the-tailpipe in town."


Special:


Get all 3-power killers for only $699.99 NOW. CALL 1-800-SLOWCLS and order your kit. It makes a great present for parents and racers. It is easy to install – have a laugh or two as you watch your buddies straining to beat that old VW Bus. So, the kids want to drive your CLS, just install the handicapper kit and that 260HP will feel like 5HP, even old people on walkers will rip the doors off the car.


Time Sensitive Offer:


If you order now, we are offering a free bottle of "Power Suck 20" octane reducer – this formula is guaranteed to reduce octane by 20 points, make sure the knock sensors will be fully engaged!

------------------
Silver 2001 CL-S with NAVI

• Mud guards
• Wheel locks
• Toyo T1S 235/45ZR17-97W* Proxies on 17x8" SSR Competition wheels (48lbs less than stock)
• Kevlar/SS Brake lines ordered
• Comptech headers & sways ready
• Silver AEM CAI ready
• 8 coats of Zaino magic

[This message has been edited by EricL (edited 04-19-2001).]

 

Yo do you accept personal checks?



------------------
_-Phil-_!
2K1 #10,029 Satin Silver CL-S since 6/13/00 named Laetitia with Navi! Mods : XEPHYR PERFORMANCE CAI~3M Reflective Tint(37%) tint~Hiper Hibrid Plasma "Xenon" road lamps & high-beams~Uniden LRD 6599SWS Radar Detector~Shine by Meguiar's Gold Wax~Member of the Scratched Rims Club~

 

All forms of payment are accepted....



------------------
Silver 2001 CL-S with NAVI

• Mud guards
• Wheel locks
• Toyo T1S 235/45ZR17-97W* Proxies on 17x8" SSR Competition wheels (48lbs less than stock)
• Kevlar/SS Brake lines ordered
• Comptech headers & sways ready
• Silver AEM CAI ready
• 8 coats of Zaino magic

 

Good save up enough $$ for a straight jacket!



------------------
2001 Satin Silver Cl Type S.
Comptech:Headers, Springs & Sways
AEM CAI
Toyo T1S Proxys 235/45/17
SSR Competition wheels 17x8
35% Llumar metallic tint
My Car

 

where do u come up witht this stuff, pretty damn funny.

------------------
Nick
01' Cl-S Silver/ Black W/ Navi and Spoiler
V-1 Radar Hard Wired, Limo Tint all around
Comptech Headers, Sways, and AEM CAI
I've got one of the CLS's from the fast batch.
Lead Foot!

 

Heh, the Delorean from "Back to the Future" needed only 88 MPH to travel back in time, no? hah!

 

LOL!!

Eric: I hope you dont have my address... I'll be sure to turn on my security system tonight you whacko lol

This is some funny shit!!

------------------
2001 Acura 3.2 CL Type-S
San Marino Red (Navigation)
PIAA 19173 Ion Yellow Fog Lights
Aftermarket Black Wood Trim Kit

 

...Eric, Eric, you have way too much time on your hand buddy

------------------
Frank
01-S White/Parchment
Comptech Sways & Springs

 

Oh man, I just barely stopped laughing.

Good Job!

------------------
~ Drew ~
2001 White CL Type S
If you're interested, check out my suspension install page for a 6th gen Civic, click here

 

I had a laugh earlier in the day -- I saw this Thunderbird with 12" wide slicks sticking out in the rear, with 2" burn marks in the tread from the fender -- I couldn't stop laughing. The rest was about 10 minutes of fun...




------------------
Silver 2001 CL-S with NAVI

• Mud guards
• Wheel locks
• Toyo T1S 235/45ZR17-97W* Proxies on 17x8" SSR Competition wheels (48lbs less than stock)
• Kevlar/SS Brake lines ordered
• Comptech headers & sways ready
• Silver AEM CAI ready
• 8 coats of Zaino magic

 

ROFL, very funny nice thread.

------------------
CL-S
White/Ebony/Navi/Spoiler/Visor/Full Bra/Mud Guards/Acura Car Cover/Tint 20%,35%,5% on Sun Roof, Rockford 250a2 Amp w/JL10w6 / K&N Drop in Filter. Comptech Springs. Polarg m-6.
Comptech Headers, Comptech Sways, Eurolite Xenon Crystal high beams.
me.

gtech 0-60 6.03 w/ 438 pound load. preheader.