S A CHO

First, let me say it's not me, seriously... Me and my girlfriend are really happy and I will just leave that at that... A buddy of mine has never once had a girlfriend, simple as that. Without getting too personal about him, I just wanted to know what would you guys think of a 19 year old never having a girlfriend? Is it a big deal? Should we try and set him up?

Typically, I wouldn't think twice about it, I'm sure he would find a girlfriend when he is ready, but lately he's asking to come with me and my girlfriend when we go out, when it's just the two of us. We both think he needs to find somebody that he can spend time with, rather than spending time with me and my girlfriend...

Let me know what you think...

Scottman111

If he's 19 it's not a big deal, but anything over 21 or so I would start to worry.



And if he's trying to hang out when you and your girlfriend go out I would tell him to F off. Who does that?


Was this kid home schooled by chance? He sounds like a social retard...

S A CHO

Exactly...

He wasn't home schooled, went to the same elematary and high school as me, and trust me, in high school, there were plenty of oppurtunities to hang out with some girls...

teranfon

I wouldn't really be bothered by the fact that he hasn't had a girlfriend by nineteen yet. To be perfectly honest I never had a serious girlfriend until nineteen as well. Is he just shy or not interested? Perhaps the best thing to do is ask him, and see if he wants to become involved with someone or not. If he does then perhaps you can introduce him to someone or help him overcome any shyness he may have.

He has to understand, however, that you want to be alone with girlfriend. I'm sure you don't mind if he joins you both from time to time, but he has to respect you're in a relationship with someone and you need time together. Unfortunately he may be hurt or angry, even lonely, but let him know the two of you are still friends and that you don't have an issue helping him find someone if he so desires.

Terry

Street Spirit

I don't think there's anything wrong with being 19 and not having a girlfriend. If it's not important to him, then it's not important right now. I have a feeling it bothers you guys more than it bothers him....?

I have a friend who is much older than 19 though who has never dated. However, she's extremely picky (and honestly, to the point of being naive and unrealistic) with the requirements she has for a potential date/bf. I'm sure if dating was really high on her priority list though she'd actually get out there and experience it, but if it's not --- that's her choice and she's obviously okay with it.

I think once she does start making an effort with someone she finds interesting, she'll soften some of her criteria and realize the world of dating won't be as precise as she's expecting. So far the most I've heard from her over the years is that she's found certain people (while in public) cute, but she doesn't go beyond telling US that (eg: telling HIM that).

S A CHO

Good posts Terry and Stree Spirit, Thanks

To be honest, it is starting to bother us (me and my girlfriend) because he's starting to want to come out with us, but that's the only reason. I understand he will find somebody he will want to spend time with, and I have no problems if he is 26 and isn't seeing anybody, but now, in our situation it's starting to get to us. I'm really lucky that my girlfriend gets along with him, and she doesn't mind if he's there once and a while...

Pull_T

I guess I need more info before i formed an opinion.

Has he simply never had a steady girlfriend or has he never had any interest in pursuing girls at all? Big distinction.

Is he a reasonable looking and have a decent personality? Is he some beligerant ugly troll?

Is he gay perhaps?

He's a grown man and you're a grown man...talk to him and ask what the deal is since you are friends. 19 is an age where it's not totally crazy that he's never had a girlfriend, so maybe he just needs to come out of his shell. I know several guys who were late bloomers so to speak who do great with the ladies now...most of them just needed a little confidence and someone to spark them.

Ask him if he'd be open to seeing if you and your girl can set up a double date with him sometime. Then he can take her (or him) out in a settng that might be more comfortable to him than a 1 on 1 date.

Could also have your girl talk to him (or both of you talk to him together) if they are close...just make sure you don't sharpen his game so much he starts banging your girl...lol

S A CHO

Good points Pull_T...

He's never had a steady girlfriend, I know that as a fact. He isn't gay from what I can tell, he always points out cute girls whenever we go out... He isn't a beligerant troll, he doesn't have anything wrong with him, he has good taste in clothes and always well groomed...

That's not a bad idea, asking if he want's to double date some time... He doesn't have problems talking to girls, he had a few friends that were girls, but I don't know if they still communicate now...

rtlltj

hes been tapping your gf on the side all this time. :P

Pug

Does your gf have a friend for him?

Infamous425

find a gf for him

joerockt

Seriously. Your GF has to have some friends she can introduce him to. You two go out, she invites her, you invite him...no brainer...

fdl

I knew guys and girls who didn't get gf's/bf's until their 20's. Usually it was because they were way too shy. No big deal.

97BlackAckCL

iTrader: (6)

:theghey:

CGTSX07

is he in college? pleanty of girls there. what is he doing only hanging out with you and your gf at age 19 anyways? where are his other friends?

S A CHO

I knew somebody would ask that... For the most honest answer I can give; I dont know...

We could easily set him up with somebody, and in my first post I asked if we should try and set him up, looks like that's what will happen...

crazymjb

I'm a senior in HS and have never been in a serious relationship. This isn't to say I have any objection to one but I just haven't found anybody worth making any sort of commitment to.

I have a friend who is so socially retarded and shy that I can easily see him never getting anywhere with anyone... On the other hand he has really low standards as he points out blatantly ugly chicks.

Mike

sho_nuff1997

iTrader: (2)

maybe he just likes to f*ck and does not want a g/f. as far as goin out with u n your g/f: he's got a thing for your girl. bring another girl n set him up

amisconception

At 19, not having a GF could be a very good thing.

PillsburyChoboy

Yeah, several of the GF-ed dudes I knew when I was 18-19 were only in the relationship because that's the only way the gals would put out. As one buddy told me in H.S., "After a while, I grow weary of handjobs ... I want the real thing."

And "girlfriend" tends to be an ambiguous term these days. Back in H.S., I had official "girlfriends" (i.e. they said yes when I said, "Do you want to be my girlfriend?") that lasted less than 10 days. Did I extract any value from any of them? No. Nothing at all, aside from incessant "no ... stop ... not yet ... I can't."

Scottman111

He just sounds shy and/or picky.


Nothing wrong with that...I'll admit, I'm picky as hell.


I have a friend about the same age in the same situation. He just doesn't know how to talk to girls to get them to realize he wants to bang them, not be their friend.

Pull_T

Proper response:

"Just let me put the tip in to see how it feels."

:ptti:

Then move on to

Chopsie

I'd call him lucky to not to have dealt with some of the shit I did at 19.
God I love being single.

leedogg

Maybe he just really likes you.

sixsixfour

so true.

csmeance

I was kinda like your friend, and had friends like you. One day he asked me why I didn't have a GF and my response was "those who wait for good relationships know the value of one." I didn't want to be in a relationship because I want to be with someone that i can talk with, have fun with, be personal with, not just to party.

saiko_cl_duck

:lol: Chris, and at the AV

Saintor

Wow. Some people are so judgemental for what is none of their business.

S A CHO

It quickly became my business when he starts infringing on my own relationship with my girlfriend... Last night was the first night in about 4 weeks that he didn't ask if he could come along, and that was only because he was busy with Thanksgiving Dinner with his family...

TypeSAddict

He was probably trying to avoid you. Thanksgiving is in November.

SupaRookie

I didnt have a gf when I was 19. It didnt bother me, all I did was play online game. You just need to find him something to do to keep him busy. Introduce a bunch of girls to him and let him decide if he wants to fish or not. Better do it fast or else it's going get to a point where you guys go all bonkers on him and ask "wtf is wrong w/ you. Cant you see we need some quality time w/o you"

Pull_T

Not in Canadanadia.

@cUr@-TL

Bah... dont worry about the gf... just make it clear that you would like to be alone with your gf once in a while...

S A CHO

Yesterday I had a good talk with him, I told him that if he wants to go out, it's just going to be the buddies, no girlfriends... He had no problem with it and understood right away what I was saying... If he ever want's to come out with us with a girl, that's absolutely not a problem and he said "I'm working on it"...

It feels much better now wit hthat off my shoulders

97BlackAckCL

iTrader: (6)

:theghey: x 2 reading more of this thread

v6cord2k5

iTrader: (1)

I have a friend from high school (we are both 20 now, but I hardly talk to em) that has never had girlfriend. The guy played video games mostly except for when I would invite em places or challenge em to play some basketball and a few other things, he hasnt had any good solid jobs that pay good, he isnt going to college, and he basically is still playing video games on his spare time.

I remember back in high school there were a couple of really hot girls that tried to get at him and he brushed them away IN FRONT OF OUR FACES, and then bragged about what he did... I looked at them and then at him and almost beat the shit out of him.

I also have another friend from high school that I also hardly talk to who claims he has had a girlfriend before, but I have never seen him with any girls... lol

Mizouse

sounds like you guys are talking about me

hornyleprechaun

@ :ptti:

07tsxchick

virgin? never had a girlfreind? i personally wouldnt want him....scary. he needs to know what he is doing

subinf

Yes.

I would like the last five years of my life back.