What can you do when your girl friend and your best friend don't get along? I've been dating my gf for almost two years and things between us are pretty good. One major issue, though, is that her and my best friend don't get along. It's to the point where my gf refuses to go to functions that my best friend would be at and doesn't like it when I hang out with him. The reasons they don't get along are unimportant at this stage as it doesn't seem like there is any possibility of reconsiliation. I'm not sure what can be done, if anything. In fact, I'm not sure why I'm even posting, but any ideas on ways to deal with the situation would be appreciated.

 

find another girl and stick with ur BEST FRIEND.

 

trick them into hanging out with each other, get both of them really drunk and convince them both that they like each other...might work.

 

then they will prob. hook up w/eachother....lol....but seriously, i had the same problem and it was never fixed. in the end you might have to choose.

 

and if they hook w/eachother then thats fawked up dawg. Better lookout... or maybe they dont get along w/eacother in front of you. But maybe behind yo back, they be getting &

 

i was just joking on my previous post.

 

you might have to choose in the end... if it can't be fixed... Depends how well you are into the relationship... if you plan on marrying this girl... for whatever your reasons... and she is the one... then friends you can make anywhere...

BUT!!!

If you aren't serious about your relationship with this girl... or you know this girl will someday leave you hanging... or forwhatever reason you don't think your relationship with her isn't going to go very far after ... then your friend will always be there... besides... true friends dont give a F#@$ what girl you are with... and your girl shouldn't give a F@#$ who your friends are... your relationship shouldn't be based around your friends or hers... it should be between you and her only... if there's a problem... talk to them both at the same time... you're the one in between all of it... bring your friend over for a BBQ... and have your girl there... crack open a couple beers (drink responsably) and talk about the situation with both of them... Tell them... you are cool with your best friend still being your friend... and that if he is a true friend... he won't care who you are with... then tell your girl... regardless if he's [INSERT some true insults, about your friend, you think your friend will laugh at here] she shouldn't care because she's not dateing him... she's dateing you... even if he's around and you are talking to him... she shouldn't care... maybe a respectable "HI" and thats it... other then that... nothing more is needed from her...

It might sound stupid... but you can juggle them around too... make time for your hommie... but also make a lot of time for your girl... that is if you can't afford to loose a friendship... or the love (if any) of your life...

 

Either your friend is a dick, or your girlfriend is a bitch. Why don't they get along?

 

Why does it have to be an "either"?

There are a few reasons. My best friend thinks she is unpleasant. My gf thinks he is rude. The fact that they see each other in this way turned this into kind of a mobius loop and things kept getting worse.

The last time they saw each other, they were both cordial, but not overly nice. This was us when we just happened to run into each other at the store. Not sure I could get them into the same place voluntarily, but I might give it a try. It sucks being stuck in the middle of this.

 

Ther'es got to be more than "she's unpleasant" or "he's rude."

I'm looking for details here.

 

Well, that was my way of saying she thinks he's a two-faced backstabber and he thinks she is a manipulative bitch. That specific enough?

 

Better

If you think your friend is a good, honest person I'm going to say he's right.

Bros before hoes.

 

i have the same exact problem.....

and it sucks. My GF is being so difficult about it. And now i might move to an apartment with my friend in NYC. I see major trouble ahead. Yes bros befroe hos but its tough cause i can see where she is coming from with her problems with him. I dont get it. Why cant we all just get along like AcuraZine(yea right, well atleast the tsx members get along).

 

bros before hos?

 

look for a trend: if your best friend is hard to get along with in general, phase him out.

if your gf is hard to get along with, don't get serious - if you get married, she'll be one of those who shit-talks her inlaws. not cool.

if it's neither, i can't say anything other than deal with it :-/

 

How about getting them to the same place (trick or whatever) and talk to them together, tell them how much it upsets you that they don't get along! Maybe they don't realize how much they are messing you up. I'd think a girl that loves you and a guy that's your best friend might be able to put whatever their past is behind them and try again?

 

they will have to get along somehow and be civil at the same time

 

The bros before hos thing doesn't work in this situation, because he put several hos before me (including a couple of my ex-gfs). It was more than a few years ago, but still.

I think they both have insecurities (don't we all) that cause them to rub each other the wrong way. Not sure if they would be able to put their differences behind, but I'm hoping they can.

 

they cheated on you and now is acting like they hate each other so you wouldn't suspect a thing.

two-faced backstabber and a manipulative bitch, yup, that's about right!















j/k, i have no idea bro

 

I houghly doubt it. He's married and more grown up than he used to be. Plus I truly believe their distain for each other is genuine.

 

They have to have sex to save the friendship.

But really, if your serious about the girl then you need to make both of them understand that this other person is part of who you are and if you can't accept him/her or just be civil in the same room then you can't accept me either. Otherwise, if the girl is just a fling for now, then the best friend comes first.

 

did your best friend come first? If so, he may be jealous of the time and energy that is no longer directed at him. The fact that he's gotten married, which would tie up some of his time, probably doesn't matter much; being jealous is not a logical feeling.

If the two genuinely don't like each other, and your relationship with your gf moves forward, the only way to retain your friendship is to set up some time that you are with him, exclusive of your gf, which isn't necessarily such a bad thing. My wife has friends that I don't much like, and she plans activities that don't involve me. Simple. And, I have a friend or two that she doesn't much like; I sustain those friendships separately as well. Just because you and your gf are becoming close does not mean that you have to share all friendships equally all of the time......

 

I usually go with the "bros before hoes " doctrine but sometimes it can get a little tricky....


Sometimes your boys start hating when you dont chill with them as much as your gf but thats a relationship!


I would try to reason and see whos wrong in the "fight" and try to talk to them....let them know how each of their friendship/relationship is important to you and if they can work with you to come to an agreement. Its all about communication.. good luck