I guess this is D&R material so here goes. Work sucks , I'm living with my parents til Jan. , I'm broke as shit , and to top it all of me and the girlfriend are on REAL rocky times relationship-wise, probly gonna be over soon . The other stuff I can handle, but the breakup might hit me pretty hard. I've never truly cared about someone like I do her, and I really don't like the idea of being without her. But there are reasons (looooooooong story, dont really feel like posting it, besides I'm a little Internet shy and it's kinda personal) that things will very likely not work out.

Like I said, I've never felt this strong about a girl. All of my other breakups were just a bump in the road. I would be a little bummed for a week or two, but I got over it pretty quick. I fear a month or two of serious crapiness with this one. She's the first girl I've ever really loved.

Anyway, I guess what I'm asking is how did y'all deal with it when you broke up with your first love?

I really would like to find another way to cope other than a sad attempt at picking up a new hobby, or drinking myself into a stupor every night. Help?

 

Is there absolutely no chance of saving this relationship?

 

if there is I haven't found it yet, but I'm not going to throw in the towel before I'm sure it's over.

 

oh and by the way, lots of meaningless sex with random girls really isn't my style, so that ones out...

 

Asking us to help you cope with the breakup is throwing in the towel in my opinion. If you really love this girl nothing's going to make breaking up with her easy. I'd recommend keeping yourself very busy - spend lots of time with the guys too.

But honestly it sounds like you care about this girl a lot and you should really be looking for ways to save whatever you have left. I know it's personal, but obviously that would be the best thing for you. I hope that works out for you...

 

have you attempted to voice your strong love to this girl? ie really talk it out and share deep emotions?...id find it cold if she didnt respond positively....

 

Honesty is the best policy.

 

Well hun, now is your time to do whats best for you. have to balance out listening to your gut and your heart. quite honestly though, you arent married so this is your time to figure things out and be a little selfish. i know what youre going through. i made the mistake of jumping into a relationship right away with someone who i could have probably loved ten times more but messed that up too. just take time to do things for you. spend a lot of time with friends and just have fun.

good luck. everything happens for a reason and will work itself out. i promise

 

StuntMonkey: I am sorry to hear that so many things aren't going well in your life. If you are truly internet shy and you prefer to talk to someone privately, you are more than welcome to pm me. I am always here to help so don't feel too shy

 

Well, if you're really getting ready for it...

I recommend getting out and spending a lot of time with friends. Try to stay busy with stuff. You want to fill in all that time you used to spend with your girl with something else equally as positive. Hang out with your friends and try not to talk about relationships. Do not watch TV, otherwise every show will seem to have a happy couple in it. Same goes for movies. Also clean out your room of any souviners or trinkets or pictures from the relationship. Stick 'em in a box and toss in your closet.

Overall, get out and do something, don't just sit around and be idle.

 

i say just keep busy, goto bars clubs or whatever you do to keep your mind off her..but if you know it's going to happen sooner then later, then get out there yourself and have fun before its over (don't cheat, but it doesnt hurt to look..) if you sit around all day and moap (did i just make up a word or someshit?) then it's useless..i learned that when you breakup wiith someone, thats just a part of life. it wasn't meant to be. if it was, it woulda worked out, so don't go all crazy over it and go out and have fun..

 

Well thanks everyone for the advice, I'll keep you posted.