So there is this girl whom I've been dating for several years now. We've been doing fairly well, little fights here and there and always making it up afterwards. However, recently I've been fairly stressed out from work, school and many other things that I yelled at her at times when I shouldn't have. So we were broken up. I've always been pretty attached to her and her to me, so when she started to hang out with some other people, new people, I guess I sort of overreacted and now we're on decent, but not the greatest terms. I asked her where we are in terms of any relationship, or if she still has feelings for me and would we be together again, she told me that she "needs more time." No definitive answers at all. She is now seeing some other guy (its been a few months) and she still tells me that she needs more time. So I'm kind of confused. I guess the logical choice is to just move on. What are some of you guy's thoughts.

 

I think you need to move on. The fact that shes dating another guy and says "need more time" is not very assuring. Plus if you keep thinking about her and if or when she finally says "no" it will be that much harder. Its probably best to move on so your not hurt as bad.

 

Its over brotha

good luck

 

Need more times = Impress me mo fo!

 

Move on. The best thing is to not expect anything from her. If you do expect to get her back, then you will feel miserable. Easier said than done.

 

Find a new girl and you will forget all about her (just like she has done to you)


Yes it sucks, but that's just how it works...

 

It means You lost your chance and it's over. Sorry buddy, I gotta put some reality sense into you.

 

Sounds like shes just saying that to stringing you along.

I can maybe understand if shes been dating a few other guys to see what else is out there, but if shes been with this other guy for a few months, then eek. I say you do the same.

 

She's been with this guy for about 2 weeks. But yeah, I think the choice was pretty clear from the beginning. Thanks a lot. I don't know if trying harder will really change anything.

 

when my wife of 16+ years left, I was crushed. I got out, met new people and have had new women in my life. It is all good, no matter what. I have had experiences that I would never had had, if I were still married.

walk away, make a new life and have fun. She is not the one for you. Even if you were to get back together now, I think the old 'baggage' will get back in the way.

 

Yea, I'm still young. The only thing that is somewhat holding me back is that, in all honesty, one of the people who I've come to care about the most and we understand each other very well. I don't exactly have a good history of staying friends with exes, but I do want to stay friends with her. There are certain situations that would force me to be around her and the new guy quite frequently, so I don't know how I should act in those situations. I mean when we're alone, everything is fine and dandy. We talk like how normal friends talk. Around him is just like, wow this is quite awkward. That said, life does go on, and I will probably just do my best to avoid them when they are around. Thanks for the advice, guys.

Edit: and/or girl[s] ?

 

That's gonna happen. Just the two of you, things are usually normal, no outside input at all. But around this other guy, of course things are going to be akward. She used to be your girl, now she's dating someone else, and you just haven't fully accepted it yet...

Honestly, move on. She might just be dating to see if you're what she really wants, but probably not. More than likely, she's dating to forget about you, and it's truly over. Trying not to be around them is probably a good idea also. It's never an avoidable situation, but don't be fake around them. Courtesy, yes, but don't try to be all buddy buddy with either of them. I think that the other guy would think you're gonna snap at him, or that you're just pyschotic. She's going to think you're kissing her ass. Let them be, and let it go.

 

Needs more time means that you need to bang her hot friends.

I think it's time to move on.

 

 

Damn so no one has any stories of taking a break from their gf/bf and then getting back together after realizing they made a mistake?

Something like that never made the relationship stronger?

Then again waiting a few months is a long time for someone to figure things out. I would quit too at that point.

 

I have one of those stories... got back together but it was never the same since... broke it off completely about 1 year after that.

 

Dude, my girl of 6years just told me she wanted a break. I guess its over when women say "taking a break". So i am back in the game, maybe a little rusty but looking forward to meeting new females.

 

Taking a break basically means she's gonna distance herself from you and start looking for other options. Based on what you've said, it appears that she already has another option. She's just stringing you along b/c she isn't sure if this other guy will pan out in the long run and she doesn't want to run the risk of losing both of you.

Do your thing man. Go out and meet new people as tough as it might be to consider at this point. If you do get back together down the line after you've sorted through all this stuff, thats cool, but at least have that happen on your terms, not hers. Don't sit by the phone while she's out livin man, life is way too short.

Hang in there, and good luck!

 

Listen to this song, man...

"Irreplaceable" - Guy Version

"I can have another you in an hour, in fact, she's upstairs in the shower..."

 

^^ funny schizzo ROFL

 

I think TLuscious might be onto something here. women like to make things more complicated than they really are, (sorry ladies, but you know it's true) so she might be seeing this oher guy to show you that she can be out of your life at any time she wants, but she tells you she needs more time to still give you a shot. She's probly only gonna get back with you if you pull some movie worthy public confession of your love for her and beg for her to take you back. IMO too much trouble, especially considering that I might be wrong and she'll look at you like a freaking moron. But if she's worth it to you it might be worth a shot.

 

time to let her go.

There's plenty of other different flavors of ice cream you haven't tried yet. Listen to Lycus 101, that might help ya a little to get you going again. Hell you might find someone in the process.

 

she wants to meet other people. you are safety net that she'll string along, as long as possible.

 

As hard as it may be now, it will be better to just let her go. You dont want to be sitting in your room in the fetal position missing her while she is out doing whatever with whomever. Go out with some of your friends and meet some new people... Just let her go..

 

My ex wanted to take a break after we started a LDR and we started fighting alot. All the girl friends that I asked about it pretty much told me that she basically wanted to be able to do whatever with whoever and not feel guilty about it. I was broke up with her instead. She was upset but Im not one to play that kind of game. We started talking again recently (its been over a year now) and things look like we might get back together but if not eh. During that time, I dont know if shes seen anybody else and I dont really care. I however have seen a few other people and im glad that I had the opportunity. Break up, move on, and have fun.

 

Thanks for all the comments. As of right now, I'm just trying to distance myself from her. The real forseeable problem is that she and I share pretty much the same group of friends. So, it is still awkward. The guy, however, was never part of our group. We'll see whats up. I'm moving on.