its not so easy to just get over it
Mud in your eye!
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 1,627
Likes: 0
From: Toronto
I feel for you TLgf...I've been through the same w/my ex, and it is hard to get over over, I've been there...took me a good 2 years to find someone I truely care about. I still think about him once in a while we had so much in common (we even had the same last name!), not enough according to him. He ended up linking up with some cougar from work with a kid no less! fawker! but that didnt last too long.
Anyways, I don't wish the pain I went through on anyone (except the cougar) Hand in there girl!
Anyways, I don't wish the pain I went through on anyone (except the cougar) Hand in there girl!
Last edited by PinkyTSX; May 23, 2005 at 07:21 PM.
Banned
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 4,578
Likes: 0
From: NYC and Tysons
Originally Posted by Infamous425
it would help better if you posted your pix. then i can get a better idea of what kind of advice to give you.
But Im sorry to hear that, I can always help you get over him if you want...some say I'm like the brown skin Dr.Phil 
Crabcakes and Football!!!
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 6,203
Likes: 12
From: Everywhere on the East Coast
Originally Posted by TLgirlfriend
I'm going to try and make this as short as possible
My boyfriend dumped me after over three years (for another girl). you have to realize that it was three years of talking about being together, getting married and having a family and then (out of nowhere) he told me it wasn't working
My boyfriend dumped me after over three years (for another girl). you have to realize that it was three years of talking about being together, getting married and having a family and then (out of nowhere) he told me it wasn't working
Same thing happened to me recently, except I was in your ex's position (that and I didnt leave my bf of the time for another guy). Anyway, sometimes things just click and you realize that what you talked about just isnt going to work anymore. It really sucks but if something is missing, then something is missing. You just have to take it one day at a time. Good luck!
Thread Starter
Intermediate
Joined: May 2005
Posts: 39
Likes: 0
From: Orange County, Ca
Originally Posted by Jaydef03
ill marry you if you like... but beware, i may sell you later on...
lol, sounds like a great offer, but I think I'll take my chances on my own for awhile first
Originally Posted by TLgirlfriend
thanks for all of the help.
I guess it really bothers me that I still care for him after he cheated, and didn't tell me about it, and lied to me and was an all around jerk. Logically, that should help me get over it, but it hasn't. and I cant figure out why that doesn't have any kind of effect.
I guess it really bothers me that I still care for him after he cheated, and didn't tell me about it, and lied to me and was an all around jerk. Logically, that should help me get over it, but it hasn't. and I cant figure out why that doesn't have any kind of effect.
But I would have to start all over at the basement level, in a new relationship, just like I started with her. God is so good, and eventhough right now you might not believe it, you will love again, just as strong (or stronger), but with someone who allows you to love them without it costing you way too much. I know with so much love to give, God has more than one person out there for you to choose from that will have that true(god-inspired) love for you.
Start on your knees and let God do the rest!
Originally Posted by DarkSithGirl
Dark and I were together for 3 years. We talked about getting married and combining our families. We even talked to our kids about it. We talked about the kind of wedding we wanted and how we wanted our marriage to be. We even talked about what kind of house and furniture we wanted to get. But in the end, he left. And I am still here. I won't say that I am stuck. And sometimes at 3 am I wake up expecting him to call...and when it doesn't happen, it hurts. Reality sets in.....again. I won't say that I am ready to move on to another relationship or even date for that matter. I have been just going out with groups of friends and going to the Dallas meets and hanging out with these guys here...Takes my mind off of it. I know in the end that God will bring the one I am supposed to be with and that all I can do is wait and pray. Blessings to you and if you need to talk, you can PM me. Geisha and I have a little support thing going on...
brandi
brandi
I decided that I wanted a love that had God in it from the very beginning...as a child of God, I demand it and I will settle for nothing less...
TL, you must do the same...it's the one thing that we as "young americans" try to do in our realtionship...we try to "fix" them for a photo-finish...there is just no way to do this...
50? you must be kidding!
Joined: May 2004
Posts: 2,119
Likes: 0
From: Indiana
Originally Posted by GeishaGirl
thanks girl!!! 
Glad to hear you guys are helping each other. Geisha is SOOOO Sweet, and I know you guys will be so good for each other getting over it all!
Take care!!
Diamonds are forever...
Joined: Dec 2001
Posts: 6,851
Likes: 0
Originally Posted by mfkitson
Glad to hear you guys are helping each other. Geisha is SOOOO Sweet, and I know you guys will be so good for each other getting over it all!
Take care!!
Take care!!
you can join our support group too 
Burning Brakes
Joined: Jun 2001
Posts: 751
Likes: 0
From: MoCo, MD
Originally Posted by PinkyTSX
I feel for you TLgf...I've been through the same w/my ex, and it is hard to get over over, I've been there...took me a good 2 years to find someone I truely care about. I still think about him once in a while we had so much in common (we even had the same last name!), not enough according to him. He ended up linking up with some cougar from work with a kid no less! fawker! but that didnt last too long.
Anyways, I don't wish the pain I went through on anyone (except the cougar) Hand in there girl!
Anyways, I don't wish the pain I went through on anyone (except the cougar) Hand in there girl!
Drifting
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 2,681
Likes: 1
From: ny
This is the worst thing in the world. I have felt your pain, and all I can tell you is just do whatever you can to pass one day at a time. Baby steps. One silly thing that may help is to sparate your feelings. Obviously the worst feeling is getting left for another person, but maybe you are pist about other things that got triggered by this mess and are grouping everything together. This just adds so much grief you'll have a nervous breakdown.
I wish you all the strength in the world. Out of all the things that all my friends told me when I was devastated, the one thing that stood out and came true in my case, was from a nice Jamaican lady I know who told me that "nobody runs from good!!" So this guy will hopefully come to his senses soon enough if indeed you are good.
I wish you all the strength in the world. Out of all the things that all my friends told me when I was devastated, the one thing that stood out and came true in my case, was from a nice Jamaican lady I know who told me that "nobody runs from good!!" So this guy will hopefully come to his senses soon enough if indeed you are good.
Burning Brakes
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 861
Likes: 0
Girl - hang in there. I know how hard it can be because not too long ago I went through a break-up myself. I wasn't left for another girl but was still heartbroken. Make sure you go out with friends to get your mind off of things. That's what I did. I began spending more time outdoors, meeting with friends, doing things and before I knew it I met someone else.
I guess "everything happens for a reason". If he left you for another girl, it means that he's not worth your time.
And from my own experience I know that it's not worth taking anyone back after a break-up. I learned my lesson...
I guess "everything happens for a reason". If he left you for another girl, it means that he's not worth your time.
And from my own experience I know that it's not worth taking anyone back after a break-up. I learned my lesson...
Burning Brakes
Joined: Jun 2001
Posts: 969
Likes: 13
From: CT
Originally Posted by TLgirlfriend
My boyfriend dumped me after over three years (for another girl). you have to realize that it was three years of talking about being together, getting married and having a family and then (out of nowhere) he told me it wasn't working
basically, the problem is that I can't seem to get over it/him. he did some pretty shitty things to me during the break up and on all accounts I should be insanely pissed at him, but I still find myself thinking about him, and wanting to be with him. I tried to meet other guys, and I even went out on a date, but I am still having tons of problems getting over him. how do I do it? is it so wrong to still lover him and want to be with him? help.
basically, the problem is that I can't seem to get over it/him. he did some pretty shitty things to me during the break up and on all accounts I should be insanely pissed at him, but I still find myself thinking about him, and wanting to be with him. I tried to meet other guys, and I even went out on a date, but I am still having tons of problems getting over him. how do I do it? is it so wrong to still lover him and want to be with him? help.
i am going through the exact same thing right now...just replace boyfriend with girlfriend and dumped with 'break'. this is buy far the worst month and a half of my life, and it feels like it will never end. reading the threads here is somewhat comforting, at least i know im not alone....
Thread Starter
Intermediate
Joined: May 2005
Posts: 39
Likes: 0
From: Orange County, Ca
Originally Posted by deandorsey
i am going through the exact same thing right now...just replace boyfriend with girlfriend and dumped with 'break'. this is buy far the worst month and a half of my life, and it feels like it will never end. reading the threads here is somewhat comforting, at least i know im not alone....
ditto
I feel like I am not alone also. I can at least see the possibility of things getting better in the future
j/k
girls, especialy single and potentially vulnerable ones. Let it be 
Team Anthracite Member
Joined: May 2004
Posts: 788
Likes: 0
From: The OC, CA
Originally Posted by Teh Jatt
ok
If you guys get her permission again I have a couple digital pics that I already have hosted and I can link. Before anyone asks, they are all clean.
The Oracle of Acurazine!
Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 28,706
Likes: 44
From: Fresno, CA
Originally Posted by tlguy99
I could have sworn there was at least one floating around here (posted during the relationship with her permission).
If you guys get her permission again I have a couple digital pics that I already have hosted and I can link. Before anyone asks, they are all clean.
If you guys get her permission again I have a couple digital pics that I already have hosted and I can link. Before anyone asks, they are all clean.
geee thax
I
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 3,865
Likes: 58
From: Chicago Suburbs
Originally Posted by TLgirlfriend
yeah that is exactly what I am going to do . . .
NOT!
but I might try to find a normal picture to post . . . maybe
NOT!
but I might try to find a normal picture to post . . . maybe
I wasn't serious, Gosh. Just trying to cheer you up.
"Don't be jealous that I've been chatting online with babes all day."