I came to the realization long ago (and still feel this way) that I do not want kids, EVER! I'm not currently in a relationship, and am fine with the idea of marriage when the right women comes along (certainly not in a rush at all), but I know that the wife and 2.5 kids with a white picket fence and minivan lifestyle and one vacation a year is just not for me. I simply don't have any desire for the responsibility. I feel the same way about owning a home. A condo would be fine, but I don't want to get up on a Saturday morning and mow the lawn, clean the gutters, etc (or pay a fortune to have it done). Life is just too short IMHO.

I'm starting another thread in 'Relationships' on marriage.

So...in my few months on AZine every thread I've started has turned into 5-10+ pages. Will this be another one

Then why did you start this one?

Probably a good idea that you don't reproduce

I want kids...................




............after I get my Ferrari.

becuase his threads all go 5-10 pages, and we all know how good those are.

i really don't think i could do a good enough job of raising them...

Wear a condom, or do the snippy snip.

MODS, closed this thread to get this self centered pig off his pedestal.

it's a good thing, you are in no danger of getting laid anytime soon.

Easy tiger...

good. this world needs less stupid people. Your offspring would only add to the stupidity.

i bet the get merged to D&R

So, because I don't want kids I'm a self-centered pig??

I guess that's your Tennessee values speaking

You have no idea what you'll be missing.

Kids > *

Why? This is likely to turn into a good, heated thread.

So...question to everyone that feels that not having kids is selfish. All of us are not cut out to be good parents. So...should everyone just pop out babies even if they are unwilling or unable to properly raise them? There are many people that have kids and because two incomes are needed to afford the basics, spend no time with their own kids, let nannies and daycare raise them, end up getting divorced or living in a dysfunctional household, etc. Is that a better alternative? In fact, I think we'd be better off as a society if more people admitted that they just don't want kids and didn't cave into the "you're a bad person if you choose not to have children" peer pressure.

kids are fun

not everyone is ready to have kids, one day you may change tour tune, not everyone is meant to have kids
https://acurazine.com/forums/ramblings-12/some-people-should-never-parents-327470/

It's all relative. Some people feel that family/children are the culmination of adulthood. I'm not in this camp. Different things matter to different people and I simply cannot fathom spending so much $$$ raising kids ... I don't want to WORK just to SUPPORT a family. I'm a hedonist by nature so I'm in no way or form going to struggle for the sake of struggling.

What are the costs-and-benefits of having kids? How much value do they really add? Are they merely an excuse for preserving the ego of an unfulfilled life (i.e. goals not met in career and life so perhaps having kids will make one feel more like a man and/or serve the opportunity to live vicariously thru them)? I really dunno. It's not like I'm toiling away on a farm and need extra hands in the fields. I know my GF thinks differently about this because she runs on a deadline (biological clock) so in essence, she wants to start pumping them out. But the more and more I think about it, I definitely want to hold it off.

I want to begin a family when I'm comfortable financially, emotionally, and all that other crap. Probably in ten years or so.

It's good he can admit this. This way we don't have to read about his kid hanging herself on a shoelace.

I agree with pretty much everything you said, and feel the same way. I think you articulated better.

My diplomacy skills can always use work. I'm not 'kid bashing', but simply saying it's probably not for me.

Don't wait that long. You don't want to be the old man at the HS basketball games.

Just don't be surprised if you change your tune in a few years.

Well, I guess nothing's certain. As a sidenote, I don't mind being around kids, just don't want my own. I LOVE dogs, though

most women want kids at aprox 30 so you have a long time, if you are not past that age yet or you could use your hands for the rest of your life, most ladies dont want to marry a man who dont want kids.

I'm not ready for kids now but i would definitely want to start a family in the future.

I personally know sever married couples in their 30s & 40s who are happily childless and got married knowing they didn't want kids. Does make it harder to find "the right one", though.

I have zero interest in marriage or children.

While i can't empathise with everything you said, i think you bring up a lot of good points here. I've wondered a lot where the actual desire to have a little half-you running around comes from. I don't have it yet in any palpable way, but i do plan on having kids later on. Somehow it just seems the logical step when you're married and slightly more settled. I know my family would be pretty pissed if i didn't start the next generation up (i'm the oldest of my generation in the family) but guilt is not a good reason to have kids. And it's not like we're underpopulated as a society.

Is it selfish to want to create a new person with the intent to mold it as best you can into who you think they should be? I don't know either. Maybe there's some merit to the idea that you (read:anyone who is), as an intelligent, well-meaning person has something of a responsibility to society to make sure good genetics don't die with you. As the one and only Harvey Danger hit says, "Been around the world and found that only stupid people are breeding." If the idiots and religious nuts keep having 5+ kids and the intelligent, educated, forward thinking people of the world can't be bothered to procreate it won't take all that long for the evolutionary process to dumb the world down as a whole.

Plus, i'll need kids that can take care of me in my old age.

I feel the EXACT same way. Wonder how many of us are out there? Of course, like I said, I feel there's a certain amount of peer pressure to get married and pop out kids.

No kids and no house is fine and dandy when you are 25. But come 65 you may be regretting those decisions.

As for marriage, I'm not religious, and I don't put much faith in the government, so the actual act of getting married doesn't really do much for me. It would be nice for the tax benefits, thats about it. This doesn't mean I'm not going to have serious relationships with women though, I just see traditional marriage as a technicality.

As far as kids, no way in hell I want them now or anywhere in the near future. I feel like I just started my real life in the last couple years, I don't want to be stuck looking after rugrats in my free time. I don't even like kids, and babies creep me out. Plus I'd rather spend my money on cars, electronics, vacations... anything thats not diapers and doctor visits. F that. I'll stick with dogs.

Maybe when I'm 40 I'll have kids.

No MORE kids for me. Last thing I wanna do is change a freakin diaper. I mean my depends are messy enough. :killer:

Hmmm. You might be a long lost relative. I've pretty much used the exact words above to describe how I feel about kids to friends. Of course, many people would consider these views selfish (and the even weider thing is I have Christian beliefs- not to be mistaken for the intolerant 'religious right', so that and my kids stance, as well as the fact that I have gay & lesbian friends makes for a weird combo, I'll admit). But...I truly believe that I can live a decent, moral life while having fun (and using my $$ to travel and buy coll stuff instead of on diapers and tuition) and can do good in other ways besides raising a family. What's moral about having two kids, never seeing them, treating them like shit, then getting divorced, which is very disruptive to a family.

Dudes can get OLD and still have kids. So that's nice. In college, I dated a cute lil' thang for a while and we mutually broke it off (apparently, we were still in that stage of our lives where we liked the idea of f'ing other people). She was 22. Her father was, no joke, 87. I recall this vividly because on the second date, she told me her father had "passed away" the previous year and when I pried what he died from (I thought accident, heart attack, etc.), she actually said, "old age ... he was 87."

I don't see how it could be considered selfish. If someone doesn't even exist yet it can't be selfish to not want to spend your time/money on them. Its not like giving up a kid for adoption because I'd rather buy a BMW than pay his college tuition.

My buddies father passed away last year, he was 92. My friend is 25. Nuts.

I like kids, in fact some are just amazing. I dont plan on having any of my own and neither does my g/f. We have both agreed that adoption could happen sometime down the road.

why adoption? and how are babies creepy?