So I met this girl a few weeks ago through a friend and we've been talking ever since. We hit it off great, we have alot in common and I felt a connection with her that I havent felt with a girl since my last girlfriend. We went out a bunch of times, hung out, hooked up and we txt each other all day. Until last friday when all of a sudden she stopped calling, txting and answering my calls/txts. The day before she cut connection with me we took a drive down to the shore and sat on the beach watching the sunset (I know it sounds romantic ). Anyway, that night went perfect and I dropped her off at her house around 1am. The next day I woke up with a cold that I still have until now and I txt'd her telling her that I couldnt go out today because I was sick(we had plans). She never answered me back. I txt'd her a few hours later and then called her just to make sure she was ok, but never answered or called me back. I called the next day as soon as I woke up and still no answer so I drive by her house to see if everythings cool but she isnt home. So since saturday I haven't tried to contact her at all, I just have no clue why she would do this. I mean I dont know if she wants me to chase after, if she does, im not that guy. I just wont call, txt her 40times in a day to reach her, i'll call you 3-4 times but after that you can go fuck yourself.
So now this is just pissing me off, something like this usually never gets to me and I just shrug it off, but she was different, I was starting to care about her and I know she felt the same.
The only thing I can think of is that she knew it was getting serious and she either freaked out or didnt wanna get into a relationship so she just bailed.
I just dont know if I should drop it and move on or wait for her to get back to me or go chase after her. Like I said before, I never freak out about things like this and move on, but with her I dont wanna lose what could have been.

Idk, i'll just wait and see what happens i guess. Any words of wisdom from fellow Aziners?

-Mark

EDIT: I just read over this and noticed I sound like a 14 year old schoolgirl

 

Even though its tough to let go since you built a connection with her. I would let it go for now unless you really really like her and you feel that she feels the same way. Not necessarily let it go but hopefully she will call you back. If she does call you back hopefully she had a reason to all of a sudden just stop hanging out with you. Good Luck.

 

sounds like she met someone else. also learn how to use things like PERIODS and COMMAS you know punctuation. reading your post almost made my mind explode..

 

stay strong if its meant to be it will work out in the long run believe me i think/ hope everything will work out for u.... what shore was she at btw? im down in seaside all the time

 

She's found another guy she likes WAY more than you.

Or, she's been in a tragic accident.

Those are really the only two things that will make a girl go no-contact without you actively doing anything wrong.

Sorry buddy, no girl who really liked you would take the chance of ignoring you for no valid reason.

Don't bother getting too upset about it, though. It won't help. Grieve by yourself, to your dog, or a strong-headed male friend. Time to meet other girls. By the way, don't feel the need to make any declarations, either. You're too cool for that. Just dust yourself off and enjoy your youth, do the things you like doing, hangout with your friends, meet new girls, and don't let girls disrespect you.

You have to keep perspective on these things, some times girls take you at a base level and adapt to you in a way that makes you feel "safe" meanwhile you have no idea she's not being forthright with you. She "gives herself" to you, says you win, but then wants you to continue to prove that you're the man. Once she sees through your veneer, she'll feel zero guilt in just dumping you in the manner that you've just been dumped (replaced). In her mind, it's your fault for presenting yourself in a way that led her to believe you were something you weren't.

This may not be you with 100% accuracy, but this happens to a lot of guys when they have a "win at any cost" mentality with women. They jump into a trap they lay for themselves. They invest energy and time into developing a "story" that they think will sell itself to a woman. And, sometimes, a girl will call that bluff. When she finds out that you're not the real deal, she feels it absolutely her right to act like you simply never existed. A male's ego is his biggest enemy when dealing with women, and accepting that these things are out of your control, is the first step in becoming the man you're supposed to be.

I don't know the details of how you two met, whether she pursued you, if she initiated all the dates, if you jumped into her world versus a shared journey or if she became the proverbial "cherry on top" in your life, so I can only speak in generalities.

Good news: your gut is right in alerting you to this inconsistency in behavior, and you should take time to reflect on what it means to you, and how you would proceed in the future if another girl did this to you.

 

Hey bro fuck that dumb bitch, dont waste your time on her she just wants a man friend she does not care how you feel physically or mentally!! Just play that hoe, there are a million more out there!!!

 

dude...you spend a wonderful day together. a beautful romantic beach filled night, drop her off at home at 1am and dont go in to fuck her...
next day you cancel on her...

she probably thinks youre not interested in her cuz you didnt fuck her and then you cancelled on her. shitty coincidence, but some girls think like that..

 

Wait, has sex not been had?

 

Give it a few more days. Maybe she had a death in her family or something. Don't leave any psycho texts or voicemail and let her make the next move. If you don't hear from her in a few days, it's time to acknowledge and move on.

BTW, how far did you get that night in A.C.? If you didn't at least stick your tongue down her throat and take off her shirt she prolly thinks you're disinterested and/or ghey (no offense).

 

Dude that was very well said, you should right like a fuckin book dude. lol

But to answer everyones questions, we messed around on the beach,some pretty heavy making out and then she blew me on the car ride back(car bj's are the best).
Sex has been had, I didnt get any luvin the first week but the last 2 weeks were boom city. And the reason I didnt go in to fuck her when I dropped her off was because we just did it at my house before I took her home.


But im not gonna dwell on it or wait for her. Im just gonna go back to living my life the way I did before I met her and maybe i'll meet another girl. But it just pisses me off how someone can seem so into you and seem like they really like you and want to be with you but on the inside they really dont. I hate it when people are fake, especially in relationships, the one thing about me is that the way you see me is the way I really am and feel. So i guess I just kinda expect everyone else to be 'real' like me, but unfortunatley they're not

-Mark

 

Thnx alot dude. We were down at L.B.I, my favorite beach in jersey

-Mark

 

-she had crush on this one guy before meeting you
-the dude didn't want her, and she was turned down
-the girl met you
-you guys seem to connect (maybe only your thought)
-that dude makes contact with her, and she's YAY about it
-bye bye

 

...

 

^ they hooked up

how far they went though..

 

She may be hung up on an ex...or have reasons why she's not ready for a relationship or something to that effect. You never know...what you DO know is that when someone wants to get a hold of you...they can, no matter what circumstance or emergency. Continue living your life and she may come around.

My current girlfriend of 2 years originally wrote me off because of a misunderstood joke and a fear of all guys being POS's because that was her previous experience. I moved on and in a week she came back around and talked about how we felt and we were good to go.

GL!@

 

See Post #10

-Mark

 

This is kinda f-d up guys, since sex has been "had". I mean normally you can tell if a girl only wants one thing right? I have met girls(nice ones) that say they dumped a guy ONLY because they didn't want it to become too serious and regretted it. With that being said, i say wait a few more days and call again and leave a very well thought out message. If she has ANY caring for you, she will call or text. If she is dead or the spawn of satan she won't and you can now notch another one on the belt.

Ps- does she have any contact with a friend that could have went behind your back with a lie?? I have seen this done.

 

Thats exactly wut im thinking.

But the only one of my friends she knows is my best friend, and they dont really know each other that well. She is a friend of my best friends girlfriend, so thats how we met and i really dont think my friend would dick me over. He has no motive to do it and I also trust him enough to no do that.

-Mark

 

Either she found out something about you that made her decide to stop seeing you, she found someone else, or she simply lost her phone (have you sent her an e-mail?).

My only advice is to wait if she's going to contact you back. If she doesn't call you back after a week, I'll consider her gone.

 

I think maybe you're over reacting a bit. Maybe she is just busy, or is trying to play it cool a bit.

At this point I would say you don't really have enough invested to be bent out of shape. Give her a couple days and try to call her again. DO NOT TEXT OR E-MAIL HER. Pick up the phone and call. If she doesn't answer, then leave a message and move on.

Or....maybe she thought you had a small pee-pee.

 

He's not overreacting.

Overreacting would be calling her non-stop and begging her for an explanation. He's done none of that, he's just aware that something's different, and that he doesn't like it. He hasn't stalked her or done anything ludicrous.

It's OK for him to feel the way he's feeling.

 

I agree with the small pee-pee comment.

 

^^ Uh...no. If it was the size of my dick, I think she would have stopped all contact after the first time we fucked, not after multiple times.

I DO NOT have a tiny dick

No but seriously, I dont have a tiny willy so thats not it.

-Mark

 

well at least you honest. you think she would like that.

well FYI i met one girl online that was hot, closeby and wanted to chat. We messaged twice on myspace, then nothing! She would log in but not read the mail i sent, then she deleted me. Now of course this would be fine if i were ugly or we didnt get along. however that was not the case and to this day i don't know what happened.

sometimes you just wonder WTF, then you realize its a girl thing.

 

I was just messing around. Don't get testy.

 

100%. Worst thing you can do is sit around inventing scenarios about what might be going on. Truth is no one knows. Maybe she won the lottery. Maybe she was in a terrible accident and is in the hospital.

I vote for not nagging her with calls or texts, but make another attempt to go see her in person - don't wait around for an answer that may or may not come. I think you had some good weeks, enough to deserve more than just a "disappearance", certainly enough to justify knocking on her door again and seeing what's up. Part of the reason is you want to deal with this face to face if possible, and also because of the outside chance something bad did happen to her, she'd be pretty pissed off if all you did was text her for a couple days then give up.

Find her, deal with facts, not conspiracy theories.

 

I wasnt getting testy, thats why I did the whole red text thing, if anything I was going along with the joke

-Mark

 

Well I havent been nagging her with calls or txts, I havent tried to contact her since saturday. But in a few hours im gonna stop by her house and see if shes there and try to get an answer. I'll keep you guys updated on what happens

-Mark

 

Good luck. She a North Jersey girl? I remember how flaky those can be.

 

i'd give it a few more days and if you still don't hear from her, the she's dead to you

 

I guess she thought bigger was better? I hope she's not seriously.

 

Don't do that! It's pointless.

She's made her decision, and she's not the type of girl you want anyway. Why do you want a girl in your life who, without notice, will drop you like you never existed?

It doesn't really matter what the reason for her behavior is. Her interest in you is not as high as you imagined. Reconcile that with yourself and find other girls who DO have a high level of interest in you.

Women are rarely honest when they pull these stunts. Going to her house and facing her or questioning her just shows how weak and needy you are. She'll say anything to get you to go away.

Be better than that.

 

while i agree you shouldn't go to her house, i am curious as to what happened

 

Agree.

You've made an attempt... it's her turn now.

If she likes you, she'll contact you. If not, she won't. Simple as that.

 

maybe she had the herp and her symptoms just started showing up so she doesn't wanna go out with you anymore or let you know that she gave it to you LOL
sorry, but it could happen..just ask _____ haha fuckin witcha

 

How you been man? Haven't seen you around much lately

 

yah, been running around, went on vacation, training for work, yada yada..been awesome, can't complain one bit...well i could, but who would listen haha =)

all i gotta say is Jamaica, spring break FTMFW

 

I didnt go to her house to reconcile and tell her I need her, I just went to find out why. All I wanted was a reason, I had no intention of trying to get back with her.

Anyway, I went to her house around 3:00 and knocked on her door. Her little sister answered the door, I told her to go get her sister and tell her to come to the door. I was waiting on the side of the door so she couldnt see me from in the house, I did this so it would make her come all the way to the door to see who was there, and I could tell by her expression that she was really surprised it was me. We started to talk and to sum it up for you guys, the reason why she did what she did was because she knew what we had was special and she knew we would end up being a couple. She went on to say that she didnt wanna deal with the sadness/pain/emotions of us breaking up when she goes away to school in a few months(august) and how that happened to her 2 years ago with her highschool boyfriend and how it destroyed her inside. She started to cry and say how although we only knew each other for a few weeks, that she felt something special with me that she hasnt felt before and how that would make the break up all the more painful. She cried some more with her head on my shoulder, she held onto me for a while and she started appologizing for doing that to me, she said she freaked and didnt know what to do, and didnt want to confront me with the truth. We ended up soming to the conclusion that even though we did have a special sonnection, that it would be for the best to just break it off. She wanted to stay friends, but I told her we both know that cant happen. We like each other too much to just be friends and it would never work and it would be better to just completely drop all connection with each other.

Although I went to her house angry and upset at what she did, when I left I understood where she came from and when I found out why she did what she did, all the anger went away. I must say that we could have had an awesome relationship, and knowing that I'll never see her or talk to her again makes me a sad panda

So thats what happened, I wanna thank my fellow Azine members who helped me out. You guys are awesome

-Mark

 

That sucks Mark. I think she has some other things to work through. If she agrees that there is a connection, and there is not anything bad, I think she has some left over drama from her past relationship she needs to work out.

If you like her, stay in touch with her. Maybe there is something there if she can work through her issues.

 

Dang it. I was hoping you would've found her in bed with another chick.