OK here is the dilemma

One of my friends dated this girl on and off for a few years.About month month in half ago they met up and . He gets a call yesterday her telling him she's knocked up. He is in school works part time in debt up to his chin. they cant stand being around each other and just dont work, he is asking her to do an abortion (to some ethical to some not i dont care) she at first wanted to but then changed her mind. I asked him if this is to get back at him or she really wants it she is 17 maybe 18. He says its more to hurt him and to get back at him. Neither of them want a kid especially at this time but she is not listening to him at at all.

Any ideas to convince her? she is also in school no work

Also want to add deep down they cant afford or handle a kid right now.

Cliffs-

-Broke up from a on and off relationship of 3 years
-hooked up had a quick
-shes knocked up
-neither cant afford or support a kid
-she does not want to do abortion

 

He needs to attempt a hail mary.

 

i just broke up with my girl its still possible this could happen to me...knock on wood it does not




anyone any input?

 

Well how old is he?

so is she 17 or 18?

Not much you can do other than live with the choice she makes and do the best you can with what you have...

Is he sure it is his?

 

pretty sure its his and i know she's 17 her birthday is soon

 

:ibdarksom1:

Here's my opinion... On and Off relationships are a biiig unless you know you can take care of yourself and wear the hard hat in the construction area... either way, "your friend" is in this bind... and there is no way out unless it clicks in her head that having a kid right now is not what she needs...

You are absolutely right when you say "they" can't take care of a kid if they are freshly out (or in) highschool... Doesn't matter if she's out to get "him" or what her motive is on keeping the baby... we can sit here and think of a million reason why, like she did it on purpose to screw "him" over... etc... but you... i mean he can go speak to her parents about the situation formaly... Be respectful and state that he's willing to take responsability, but that his thoughts are that they shouldn't go through with it because it will be hard not just on his future, but on their daughters... If the parents are not responsive, then appologize for taking their time, and walk out... simple as that...

If they are responsive to the conversation, they'll most likely speak to their daughter and MAYBE the abortion will come...

If they are not responsive to the conversation, the'll most likely support her in the decision of keeping the baby and he should prepare to take responsability for his actions... 50/50 custody...

 

Maybe he should send a few little ones over to her house for a day or to so she knows what she is getting herself into.


Well it's not the end of the world, but the world as they knew it will be changing.

 

"Also want to add deep down we cant afford or handle a kid right now".

So is this you...

 

i told him something in that matter parents could almost careless her older sister had a kid when she was 17 so the person she looked up to set her in the wrong path....i'm trying to tell him to go with the whole she will have to leave school take care of the kid have no life it will screw her and him up....

 

no its my brother in laws younger brother.......


I could end up in the same boat. i broke up this week of a girl of 3 years and like 2 weeks ago i didnt know she switch birth control and she had a gap of not taking it so knock on wood i dont end up going threw thing knock on wood

 

That's rough. I'm not one to advocate abortion although I am pro-choice. I think if she chooses to have this kid and keep it, she had better have some serious support from her family. I don't think the average 17-18 year old have a clue what it takes to be a parent. I think your friend should MAN UP and try to be as responsible and supportive as he can if she keeps the baby. Doesn't matter how he feels about her, he's going to have a kid to care for.

It sucks that he is pushed into this situation at such a young age, but unfortuntely, he needs to accept some responsibility.

 

yes it will happen since you put it all over the forum...knocking on wood aint gonna help..... save all ur duckets...ur next mod is a baby seat.......lol




seriously, is ur friend sure she's prego? take her to see a doctor immedialty before he has unprotected sex again and she really becomes prego. females lie about shit like that for attention or to win someone back. If the parents don't know u should tell them or let adult know so some family planning can start early instead of last minute.

 

There is only one solution....




(whoever made this is an idiot)

 

If she has this child I would definitely advise a paternity test.

 

Not advocating any side but has she thought about carrying the baby to term and then giving him/her up for adoption? Lot's of people would love a healthy happy baby.

 

HE'S sure, they went to the doc, and yes he's getting to drop school and go work full time. he's manning up to it just she is still in the abort stage and everyone knows she wants to but she's not doing it......

 

i know of at least 3-4 girls in high school had it that way.

 

thats a given she was not much of a slut but who am i to judge.

 

also he just turned 20 not to long ago and he did running start in hs so he's in 2nd or 3rd year of collage.

 

I am pro-choice, what ever the two decides between them. For this situation I would suggest adoption, if neither of the two is ready for a kid. You and always give another family that gift, and you will always know that the kid is being taken care of and loved unconditional.

 

Honorable Darksom1 say:


"When one lay down and pretend to be a man, it should be understood that when one stand up...he may actually have to be one..."

Or as they say in America..."Would you like fries with that order sir?"


Nuff said!

 

i spoke with him this morning (she does not like me) he just got an apartment they're moving in together and will have a court house marriage. just gonna have the kid and do they're best to live together ( together to-get-her ) unless she decides to abort he had a gf was about to ask her to marry her

 

Well, shit happens. They just gotta live with it now.

Tell her to watch Juno and suggest she do the same. No good will come out of this, I guarantee everything I have.

 

if the Leykis Hail Mary no workie, then he had better get a DNA test on the kid...

 

If he didn't use protection when he then he's SOL, time to man-up!

Not to sound racist , but are they Russian:communist ?

 

he's Russian shes American


i know i would where one no matter what the bitch says. but she told him she was on the pill :entrapment:

 

Do whatever you can to keep that marriage from happening. Talk about a train wreck!! WOW, first you knock up a chick that you can barely stand, then he is going to marry her? WTF!! My mom got pregnant with me when she was 16 had me at 17. They (my parents) ended up getting married because it was the right thing to do. They had my sister 4 years later and got divorced after a total of 10 years. 5 of those years were filled with fighting, threats, affairs (my dad), drugs (my dad), jail time (my dad). Point is, it won't work.

A mostly happy life as a single parent (or with a woman you actually want to be with) is much better than a miserable, unhappy, fight filled marriage. I'm glad my mom chose to A. have me B. Keep me, but I think she was a very mature 17 year old. If they can't handle it, put the baby up for adoption, there are so many couple out there that CAN'T have kids that WANT them. If she's doing this to "get back at him" that's bullshit, does she realize this act of revenge has an 18 year shelf life? Good luck whatever the outcome.

 

i've been beating almost the same to death. his sister got married after getting knocked up the guy abused her she's hot to.. took almost 7 years of jail,drinking,fights,abuse,black eyes(he beat her) to get out of it. in this case she will beat him.

 

Now that you mention that, do not let him get married if he doesn't want to (marring her simply because she's pregnant with his kid is not a good idea, as other said). Hell, maybe if she believes that he will provide minimum support, she'll go through with abortion. What sort of background does she come from, can she afford to have the child on her own? Will her family support her or will they be indifferent?

 

The bottomline is, there is a baby on the way, or there is NOT a baby on the way. And somebody is the daddy! Your boy thinks or KNOWS it's him. So he has to be a man and take care of it. It may mean two jobs, it may mean giving up his freedom, it may mean giving up his dreams, but since he gave up the sperm freely, he should so inclined about the other things!

But hey, as an alternative...the only thing you guys are asking the baby to do is give up his LIFE right? Soo...which one of you would be willing to do the same so someone you know can sleep better at night or have more money in there pockets hmmm?? Who would be willing to die so that others can "party on"?? None of you...so raise the kid. Don't marry the chick and make fighting idiots of yourself and ruin the kid's life and your's in the process. Just tell them to be a man and a woman about it, adults, and raise the kid the best they know how; and that's separately and together!

Everything I said I would do in a heartbeat with no reservation! All of it. Fucking people that make kids and then bitch about giving up their life should try not GIVING life, so they can keep their own. I paid child support and then some so my kid can have everything she needed. But I kicked her mom to the curb because she was illin'!! You don't need a woman to be a man. It starts with the nuts or balls...so finish it - have some balls! Just be a man...I know he's trying to be by marrying her, but your boy looks at too much TV an shit...he better be glad he didn't really end his life, because a potential pregnancy means he went in bareback, so he coulda got his get out of jail free card revoked and got A-to-da-I-D-S!!

P.S. - funny as shit you saying the woman would whip his ass!!

Peace2fingaz!

 

tell you friend to get a DNA test. if his, man up and take responsibilty for the baby.

 

I've kicked it with them for a week or so now dinner,movie,hung out. They are totally doing better not as cut throat as they use to be. but he has said he will be doing a PT, to make sure its his..

 

Most definitely!