imj0257

iTrader: (1)

Ok guys I just recently broke up with a girl after dating for a couple months. Nothing TOO serious but a part of me still likes her but now I'm just trying to forget her... after all she is the one that really broke it off cus she doesn't know what SHE wants. For example one day she calls and texts me and says she misses me and the next she doesnt wanna talk. Like this past Sunday she said she missed being around me and wanted to go to lunch this week so the next day I said wanna go to lunch tomorrow and shes like 'maybe?' and 'I'm like well make a decision its not that hard' and havent heard back from her lol.

Anyways I've tried to think of all the negative things I can such as she works late night shifts which means I only see her on the weekend which is really hard for 'dating', she has little to no motivation with her career (college degree and works at some warehouse... could be doing something better making more money such as teaching ... since she went to school to learn that), very indecisive and always changing her mind..etc as you can see afrom the example above. Also one of my best buds is her best guy friend, granted I've known him longer... and she kept saying it was all awkward cus of that (I thought it was at first too but got over it, she apparently didn't... and no she doesn't like this dude they are just bffs, hes too ADHD rtarded). And on top of that she hangs out with the guys I hang out with .. our little group of friends. Only good thing is shes great looking.. banging body.

I know I have tons of good reasons to forget her but I still have that knot in my stomach like a part of me still likes her. C'mon guys help me forget about her!. Only when I'm around my friends do I really forget her but that isn't often during the week cus of work :/

Sorry to dump this on u guys I don't wanna sound like a lamer but could def use the help

Tripp11

Sounds like she's dragging you along...

If you truly want to be done with her, don't take her calls and ignore her texts. Don't reply or respond to her at all - cold turkey. See her out, leave. Shortly enough, she'll get the hint and move on too.

Just hang out with your bros and when you're not doing that, keep your mind occupied on other things: work, working out, working on your car, etc...

Q1911

:IBMoveToD&R:

imj0257

iTrader: (1)

O got wut D&R is.. sorry musta missed that forum :/

Second, I do keep my mind occupied when I wash my car or when I go for a run everyday after work and also when hanging out with my bros, but it is hard cus she also hangs out with the people i hang out with. And the thing is I dont want to completely ignore her I want to still be friends but she just WONT TALK with me... its kinda like shes acting childish?

Btw I got tix to a concert next week and she initially said she wanted to go so I got her a ticket and then recently after we stopped dating I asked her if she still wanted to go, as friends n stuff I guess, and she was like ok cool, sooo I kinda need someone to go to that concert with and she still hasnt paid me my $60 I want my money too!

darksom1

You are on the right track. You should forget about her. Because her ways are bad for you. You are looking for more than she is willing to give, so you must bow out. You can't change her or get her to like you by your advances, so she is not the one for you. You just have to accept that. That is easier to do if you get somethng else on your mind...like other women. Since you obviously are not in love with her rigghhttt? Hmm...

A car won't make it go away, nor will playing ball or video games. You want her to go away and get rid of that "gut feelng"? Get some more ass lined up! Then you won't care what she does or doesn't do! Now go forth and conquer!!!

darksom1

D&R is the forum you are in right now: Dating & Relationships.

As for the girl, the concert, and the money...

You said the girl changes her mind all the time, so why in HELL would you buy tickets for a concert thinking she DEFINITELY would show? That's your fault dude. Sell the ticket or go with a friend if she won't go, but you did that to yourself.

Also, you don't have to ignore her, just treat her like one of the boys. If you can't handle that then sit down and have a one on one with her about how you really feel and stop pretending you don't have feelings for her when you see her, because you obviously do. But whatever is the end of that conversation with her, is what you have to be willing to accept!

imj0257

iTrader: (1)

No no, I bought the tickets like a month ago when things were good, not just recently.

And I've been trying to have a one on one convo but she either doesn't call/txt me back or changes the subject. Only when we are out drinking with friends on the weekends does she want to 'talk one on one' omg.

:/ sorry

1killercls

Cleanse your soul of her by posting up some NooDs

darksom1

Ok, see, so what does that tell you? She is not interested in you. You just basically said she is not interested in you. You are making yourself feel worse by hanging on. The only reason you still like her, is because you haven't learned to put yourself first man. Be the man. You are more important. Stop chasing a ghost...she's gone, whether you like it or not. She's trying to let you down softly. So take the hint.

Go out and date other chicks man. More than one because you can't handle just one right now. Now go...GOOOO...conquer and report back on what you conquered!

darksom1

+1,818,398,393,430,430

1BadCL-S

I know how you feel, becasue i had the same relationship with my ex. Best thing to do is just start dating and go out and meet another chicks. Trust me, i tried to to be in a relationship like this, but its all B/S. Its not going work out, Its just going hurt u in the future.

TzarChasm

^
Like he said. Besides, she may just be one of those f'ed up chicks that wants to get your attention by ignoring you. I had one like that once, every time I got fed up with her she was all over me, she just loved the drama. I finally just started ignoring her, eventually she went away.

RaviNJCLs

iTrader: (4)

I don't know why it's so tough for you guys to ignore text messages, e-mails and phone calls. Just do it. It's not like if you respond she will magically appear. It's OVER. Move on.

If your next post has to do with answering her text message, etc, we will have Darksom come over and beat the crap out of you while he does bad things to your ex.

As for the knots in your stomach....it will go away. Keep busy. Hang out with friends, pick up a hobby, work out. Or my personal favorite....call her best friend up for a date.

Good luck.

imj0257

iTrader: (1)

so she sent me this text msg that I answered once...



ahahah jk




No but really, thanks for the input guys ... its helping.

amisconception

Date as many women as you can handle. Pursue them sexually. Don't take any crap. Have fun. You'll get over her in time.

TzarChasm

Didn't he say her best friend was a guy? Are you trying to imply something?

RaviNJCLs

iTrader: (4)

Sorry....I wasn't implying he was gay.

imj0257

iTrader: (1)

thanks cus im NOT.





anyways i have an update: she just texted me "sorry about the wierdness i honestly dont know what to say". SO EXPERTS... what should i do?

savage

tell her she should be inviting you over for dinner and that you should bring the whip cream for desert...

RaviNJCLs

iTrader: (4)

Your lack of response should hopefully serve as a "response" to her.

JediMindTricks

ignore it.

who knows what she's going through. but it's certainly not putting you in a good situation. sounds like she doesn't want to be with you but is clinging on to you for whatever reasons.

i think we've all been in these kind of situations before.

what helped me was hanging out with the guys and using the extra free time for hobbies, etc. i know it's toughs since you guys have mutual friends, but i'm sure you can still work something out with them.

but good luck man. at least your car will be cleaner, you'll be in better shape with the running, and you'll save $$$.

imj0257

iTrader: (1)

Ya i was planning on ignoring it. And you are right - my car WILL be cleaner except for when my friend crosses his leg over the other and the shoes put dirty marks on the dash (i know we've all had friends taht do that), i dunno bout the better shape cus i still drink a lot, and i WILL save $$.

TzarChasm

If you really think you liker her, tell her that she needs to figure things out and get back to you in a couple days. Not what I would do, but, if you are really into her, you might be able to get a few more pokes in before it all goes to hell.

My guess is that you are the "comfort guy" she already has you so is trying to keep you around, but is really thinking to herself, "I wish someone better would come along". As soon as someone she thinks is better shows up, you are all done and its "oh it's nothing you did, it was me...bla bla bla"

darksom1

I think it's obvious that you can not get with this girl because you have feelings for her, and she has already given you the "Heisman stiff arm". What you are experiencing (her text to you) is a break from the bullshit, but it will resurface. Dump her and find some girls to practice "relating to women" on. You are too emotionally charged right now so "one woman" is not what you need.

Broaden your horizons, and strengthen your game. Then the next time, you will be ready...

Cocoa

iTrader: (2)

The best way to deal with negative shit in your life, is to turn negative energy to positive engery. My solution has always been the gym, or working on the car. But the gym would help anyone. It can help you clear your mind, or give you the time to really think things through.

imj0257

iTrader: (1)

Ya cocoa. I go for run for a couple miles everyday right after work and that definately helps the best. But still then there are times... like now sitting at work bored as fuck, where I can't rid it of my mind.

Let me start by saying it has gotten better, you guys have been a good help But I learned that the guy I was talking about earlier who is one of my best friends really never wanted this to happen in the first place and was trying to fuk it up from the start. I'm guessing he was jealous cus he had no girl or was afraid we would spend less time with him, but he just says he is looking out for me... I dunno.

Here's the deal, I know I am going to have to be around her a lot in the future cus like I said earlier, she hangs out with my friends; we are all one big group of friends. So I don't want to end this bitterly and shit and make it all awkward. So, going back to that text she randomly sent me yesterday which was "sorry about the wierdness i honestly dont know what to say". So far I have just ignored it but have been contemplating sending a response ... something along the lines of "well you just said something" or "whatever thats cool". So, are these good or stupid responses and if stupid what would be a good one OR should I just not respond at all?

darksom1

Respond - If you think you can handle being a friend only

Don't respond - If you can't...

You are a friend now. Women hound who they want. You are not wanted in that way. You are being remembered once in a while or blue moon. You know what the deal is already. Stop stalling. The sooner you accept it, and start hanging out with and smashing other broads, the better for you. Fuck cleaning cars, fuck the gym...none of that can hold you, kiss you, laugh with you or fuck you. THAT'S why they only work temporarily. Go find something that will for those days and nights when you are lonely...which should be plentiful right about now...

Learn when to move on...even when...

imj0257

iTrader: (1)

well I think I can handle being a friend only, so I'm thinking I should respond. But, what should I say?!

darksom1

How about being a friend, and still not responding? Not necessary to respond to that on any account. She asked for no rebuttal...just drop it. If something becomes of you and her, you can discuss it then. But since you are just friends for now...let it go!

imj0257

iTrader: (1)

i got drunk and sent her a msg... i coudlnt help myself :/

me: "well if the weirdness is still cus of "him" then im not even gonna say anything, im trying to make it not-weird, just tryin to talk. just make ur own decision im cool with whatever. but its tru ur text response time needs improvement"

her: "ya im bad with my phone"

me: "ha good diversion. i just dont want things to be awkward"

her: "they aren't"

me: "aite cool"



ok i know this convo sounds lame and it kinda is but fuck the flaming dr pepper got to me. i think i handled it at least decently lol.

ThreePointTwoTeeEl

iTrader: (1)

Just Sparkkkkkk. Im in the same boat as you buddy but its worse cause it was much more serious with her...What do I do to take it off my mind especially at night? Sparkkkkkkkk thats what I do. Also, I hang out with my friends too and we spark as well. Im just tryin to keep busy i know what you mean but you sitting at work bored and thats al you think of cause thats all i think of too..until i spark until im retarded and droolin cause i just cant control any bodily functions lol. My way of forgetting is sparking which I know isnt a good thing.....cant fix a bad thing with another bad thing buy idk what else to do...hopefully something will come up..


Also this happened before and to get my mind off of it i actually txted this chick i knew from HS.......we talked here and there and she liked me in HS too but I didnt....I should of liked her back but i was an idiot....

When I saw her to hang out..well.......lets say Eminem says it best...

"I Just Met You And I Just Fucked You"

ThreePointTwoTeeEl

iTrader: (1)

BTW Fucking that chick did the trick. Then I got back with the same girl cause she txted me. Now im in the same boat as you again. I need another chick to bang to help the situation out. BTW any ladies in belleville area looking for a good time let me know. Holla atcha Boi!

P.S. - Nice Guys Always Finish Last.

heyitsvu

iTrader: (1)

imj0257

iTrader: (1)

Oh ya I forgot to mention I'm over her. She is being a total fucking bitch. Not talking to me and arguing with my friend about stupid shit that is her fault... now I realize what a total immature bitch she is; she needs to grow up. She is outta of my thoughts lol.

But thanks guys!

Btw I had a chance with this hot waitress at this bar/grill until she told me she was 17 and i was like 'laterz' :/

youngTL

I'm glad you realized that she was an indicisive bitch. I woulda responded to her text message with "Well, I do know what to say, unlike you. GTFO my life."

Don't ever let women think they can have it their way without considering your plans, and make you bend to whatever they want to arbitrarily do.

amisconception

Selfish entitlement princesses can GTFO.

imj0257

iTrader: (1)

so we went to a friends pool party this weekend with lots of beer n drunkenness and she was there and we basically got back together for the night (just lots of making out) then i took her home and she said she still liked me and only resason she stopped seeing me was cus of all the drama from other friends - mainly that one that didnt want us together in the first place. I'm not giving in im like w/e that was fun but im not gonna pursue you lol butttt if u want to come to me for random sex i am open like 7/11 :P

moeronn

Yeah, that will help you get over her, increase your self worth and keep the drama out of your life.

RaviNJCLs

iTrader: (4)

^^^^

Agree. It's not like your other friends are going to all of a sudden GROW THE F**K UP. If you get back together, we will just have to be prepared for another thread saying "You guys were right." But hey, maybe you like dealing with immature BS.

RaviNJCLs

iTrader: (4)

By the way, you next post or even the thought in your mind should NOT be.....


Because you know it won't.