Gettin the "Best Friend" excuse...
#1
Gettin the "Best Friend" excuse...
maybe im just the guy who gets this alot.
"your too good of a friend to risk losing the relationship we have now."
Are there people who are just natural people who are thought of as best friends rather than people girls would date?
i swear, im on good terms with just about every girl i no, but being a friend whos there for them always and those girls dont take me seriously about relationships.
sure i have date and have girlfriends and shit, but when it come to the girls i really wanna be in a relationship with, they keep on tellin me it would mess the great thing that we've got goin.
Sure i say that if we were really great friends that nothing would change that, even if we were in a relationship... But they still dont give me a chance.
does anyone else get this?
"your too good of a friend to risk losing the relationship we have now."
Are there people who are just natural people who are thought of as best friends rather than people girls would date?
i swear, im on good terms with just about every girl i no, but being a friend whos there for them always and those girls dont take me seriously about relationships.
sure i have date and have girlfriends and shit, but when it come to the girls i really wanna be in a relationship with, they keep on tellin me it would mess the great thing that we've got goin.
Sure i say that if we were really great friends that nothing would change that, even if we were in a relationship... But they still dont give me a chance.
does anyone else get this?
#5
Go Giants
You are probably too ugly for sex....
#7
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What the F is a 15-yo male wanting to be in a relationship for? Is that the only way to get laid? It's almost like you're taking the perspective of the stereotypical, needy gal.
Take it from me, at that age, the costs far outweigh the benefits in most relationships.
Take it from me, at that age, the costs far outweigh the benefits in most relationships.
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#9
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Originally Posted by Acuraluvr
maybe im just the guy who gets this alot.
"your too good of a friend to risk losing the relationship we have now."
Are there people who are just natural people who are thought of as best friends rather than people girls would date?
i swear, im on good terms with just about every girl i no, but being a friend whos there for them always and those girls dont take me seriously about relationships.
sure i have date and have girlfriends and shit, but when it come to the girls i really wanna be in a relationship with, they keep on tellin me it would mess the great thing that we've got goin.
Sure i say that if we were really great friends that nothing would change that, even if we were in a relationship... But they still dont give me a chance.
does anyone else get this?
"your too good of a friend to risk losing the relationship we have now."
Are there people who are just natural people who are thought of as best friends rather than people girls would date?
i swear, im on good terms with just about every girl i no, but being a friend whos there for them always and those girls dont take me seriously about relationships.
sure i have date and have girlfriends and shit, but when it come to the girls i really wanna be in a relationship with, they keep on tellin me it would mess the great thing that we've got goin.
Sure i say that if we were really great friends that nothing would change that, even if we were in a relationship... But they still dont give me a chance.
does anyone else get this?
A guy should "never" get too friendly with a hot chick. You could be friendly but know the limit, don't go out of your way to do things for a hot chick or go over when she needs to talk about her issues. Being friendly can lead to getting lucky, but being too friendly becomes a "gay friend." When you become her bestfriend, 2 things can happen; 1) she wants to fuck you or 2) she thinks of you as one of her girlfriends.
If you like a girl, be a man and ask her out before she gets too comfortable with you. More importantly, know your time limit. If you want to hook up with a girl or get into a relationship, don't be friends with her for months becuase most women will think of you as "just a friend." Once you're in her "friends zone" you might as well cut off your dick cuz she obviously will think you have none.
#11
Team Camel, VP for Zaino
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When Harry Met Sally
Try this . . .
Billy Crystal (Harry Burns): You realize of course that we could never be friends.
Meg Ryan (Sally Albright): Why not?
Billy Crystal (Harry): What I'm saying is - and this is not a come-on in any way, shape or form - is that men and women can't be friends because the sex part always gets in the way.
Meg Ryan (Sally): That's not true. I have a number of men friends and there is no sex involved.
Billy Crystal (Harry): No you don't.
Meg Ryan (Sally): : Yes I do.
Billy Crystal (Harry): No you don't.
Meg Ryan (Sally): Yes I do.
Billy Crystal (Harry): You only think you do.
Meg Ryan (Sally): You say I'm having sex with these men without my knowledge?
Billy Crystal (Harry):: No, what I'm saying is they all WANT to have sex with you.
Meg Ryan (Sally): They do not!
Billy Crystal (Harry): Do too.
Meg Ryan (Sally): They do not.
Billy Crystal (Harry): Do too.
Meg Ryan (Sally): How do you know?
Billy Crystal (Harry):Because no man can be friends with a woman that he finds attractive. He always wants to have sex with her.
Meg Ryan (Sally): So, you're saying that a man can be friends with a woman he finds unattractive?
Billy Crystal (Harry): No. You pretty much want to nail 'em too.
Meg Ryan (Sally): What if THEY don't want to have sex with YOU?
Billy Crystal (Harry): Doesn't matter because the sex thing is already out there so the friendship is ultimately doomed and that is the end of the story.
Meg Ryan (Sally): Well, I guess we're not going to be friends then.
Billy Crystal (Harry): I guess not.
Meg Ryan (Sally): That's too bad. You were the only person I knew in New York.
Billy Crystal (Harry Burns): You realize of course that we could never be friends.
Meg Ryan (Sally Albright): Why not?
Billy Crystal (Harry): What I'm saying is - and this is not a come-on in any way, shape or form - is that men and women can't be friends because the sex part always gets in the way.
Meg Ryan (Sally): That's not true. I have a number of men friends and there is no sex involved.
Billy Crystal (Harry): No you don't.
Meg Ryan (Sally): : Yes I do.
Billy Crystal (Harry): No you don't.
Meg Ryan (Sally): Yes I do.
Billy Crystal (Harry): You only think you do.
Meg Ryan (Sally): You say I'm having sex with these men without my knowledge?
Billy Crystal (Harry):: No, what I'm saying is they all WANT to have sex with you.
Meg Ryan (Sally): They do not!
Billy Crystal (Harry): Do too.
Meg Ryan (Sally): They do not.
Billy Crystal (Harry): Do too.
Meg Ryan (Sally): How do you know?
Billy Crystal (Harry):Because no man can be friends with a woman that he finds attractive. He always wants to have sex with her.
Meg Ryan (Sally): So, you're saying that a man can be friends with a woman he finds unattractive?
Billy Crystal (Harry): No. You pretty much want to nail 'em too.
Meg Ryan (Sally): What if THEY don't want to have sex with YOU?
Billy Crystal (Harry): Doesn't matter because the sex thing is already out there so the friendship is ultimately doomed and that is the end of the story.
Meg Ryan (Sally): Well, I guess we're not going to be friends then.
Billy Crystal (Harry): I guess not.
Meg Ryan (Sally): That's too bad. You were the only person I knew in New York.
#12
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Originally Posted by BoostedJack
Once you're in the friends zone, alcohol will not work.
So true, i see it happen to a couple of my friends way to often
#13
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Originally Posted by BoostedJack
No. Your problem is simple, you get too friendly with every woman. It's a good thing when you just want to be friends but a terrible thing to do when you want to get lucky.
A guy should "never" get too friendly with a hot chick. You could be friendly but know the limit, don't go out of your way to do things for a hot chick or go over when she needs to talk about her issues. Being friendly can lead to getting lucky, but being too friendly becomes a "gay friend." When you become her bestfriend, 2 things can happen; 1) she wants to fuck you or 2) she thinks of you as one of her girlfriends.
If you like a girl, be a man and ask her out before she gets too comfortable with you. More importantly, know your time limit. If you want to hook up with a girl or get into a relationship, don't be friends with her for months becuase most women will think of you as "just a friend." Once you're in her "friends zone" you might as well cut off your dick cuz she obviously will think you have none.
A guy should "never" get too friendly with a hot chick. You could be friendly but know the limit, don't go out of your way to do things for a hot chick or go over when she needs to talk about her issues. Being friendly can lead to getting lucky, but being too friendly becomes a "gay friend." When you become her bestfriend, 2 things can happen; 1) she wants to fuck you or 2) she thinks of you as one of her girlfriends.
If you like a girl, be a man and ask her out before she gets too comfortable with you. More importantly, know your time limit. If you want to hook up with a girl or get into a relationship, don't be friends with her for months becuase most women will think of you as "just a friend." Once you're in her "friends zone" you might as well cut off your dick cuz she obviously will think you have none.
#14
Senior Moderator
The 'window of opportunity' is very small ... you have to make the most of it. And as others have stated ... you're 15yo ... there is no inherent need to have girlfriends. Sure ... you want to mess around with a girl ... but it doesn't mean you have to be BF / GF, does it?
15 is a bit of a transition age -- depends on if you hit your growth spurt, voice changing ... etc. I think that's when you learn your confidence with the other sex ... you gotta show you can be a man (that does not mean macho ... but confident with who you are ... macho guys are compensating for something they don't have)
Good luck. It's fine to be friends with the ladies (I was when I was in HS) but hooking up was tough at first (new to the game). Learn your approach and be OK when they say no. Move on... when you go to college, you'll see what I mean -- way more selection. (High school is so clique-y)
That rarely happens ... once you leave the friend-zone to relationship ... never goes back to being just 'friends'. I lucked out a couple of times, but many more times they don't want to talk to me.
15 is a bit of a transition age -- depends on if you hit your growth spurt, voice changing ... etc. I think that's when you learn your confidence with the other sex ... you gotta show you can be a man (that does not mean macho ... but confident with who you are ... macho guys are compensating for something they don't have)
Good luck. It's fine to be friends with the ladies (I was when I was in HS) but hooking up was tough at first (new to the game). Learn your approach and be OK when they say no. Move on... when you go to college, you'll see what I mean -- way more selection. (High school is so clique-y)
Sure i say that if we were really great friends that nothing would change that, even if we were in a relationship... But they still dont give me a chance.
#16
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Originally Posted by ussi
Seinfeld warned of the 'friend zone', you're doomed once you're in.
#17
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I might add... at age 15, you are in a transition age. Keep in mind that "Not taking control/advantage of the opportunity" is the same as "Being rejected after trying." Either way you won't get the pussy. So chances are, you might as well go for it and get rejected. At least you can say "hey, I tried."
Trying = % of getting lucky
Not trying = 0%
trying > Not trying
Trying = % of getting lucky
Not trying = 0%
trying > Not trying
#20
Drifting
my friend was in the friendzone...told her.. she denied him she then tried to see if it'll work out...it didnt...they no longer talk...im not sayin not to tell her...but only do if ur willin to risk everything dont come on too strong either
#22
Team Owner
The one thing I didn't learn until I was 20 is that most teenage girls are easy to get. Don't over think it.
Just act like a punk toward them and they will magically want you. If you find yourself wondering why all the hot girls go out with the assholes. The answer is, the assholes know how to play the game.
Just act like a punk toward them and they will magically want you. If you find yourself wondering why all the hot girls go out with the assholes. The answer is, the assholes know how to play the game.
#23
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Originally Posted by 97BlackAckCL
If you're a friend, you're screwed, the friend excuse usually means they have no interest in you other than being a friend
that and the "you're more like a brother to me" excuse.
#24
Suzuka Master
Originally Posted by joerockt
Time to start being an asshole. Trust me, the sooner you learn, the better
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Originally Posted by doopstr
The one thing I didn't learn until I was 20 is that most teenage girls are easy to get. Don't over think it.
Just act like a punk toward them and they will magically want you. If you find yourself wondering why all the hot girls go out with the assholes. The answer is, the assholes know how to play the game.
Just act like a punk toward them and they will magically want you. If you find yourself wondering why all the hot girls go out with the assholes. The answer is, the assholes know how to play the game.
#26
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Yeah it has happened to me before and I think it happens to everyone but it sucks and you just have to move on and look for another potential girlfriend.
#28
You don't have to be an asshole. You just can't act like EVERY other guy out there. It's sad how MOST guys act, and try to pick up girls.
Being 15 and in H.S it's more or less how popular you are, you have to be the alpha male. (something I was not) When I was 20 I changed my ways, my attitude,and my approach. All of this advice will pay off when you are out of school. Not so much now.
From what I see all H.S girls are mostly immature, and there really is no "Type" of guy they are looking for. You just have to stand out. I'm a very nice guy (so I'm told) and I have NO problems with girls/women at all. I win most and lose some. I just move on from the ones that aren't interested. The real kicker is, when I say ok, and leave them alone, they usually come back wanting to be with me, but at that point it's too late. If you go back they will know your a wimp.
Being 15 and in H.S it's more or less how popular you are, you have to be the alpha male. (something I was not) When I was 20 I changed my ways, my attitude,and my approach. All of this advice will pay off when you are out of school. Not so much now.
From what I see all H.S girls are mostly immature, and there really is no "Type" of guy they are looking for. You just have to stand out. I'm a very nice guy (so I'm told) and I have NO problems with girls/women at all. I win most and lose some. I just move on from the ones that aren't interested. The real kicker is, when I say ok, and leave them alone, they usually come back wanting to be with me, but at that point it's too late. If you go back they will know your a wimp.
#29
Earth-bound misfit
Originally Posted by ChrisQ1980
You don't have to be an asshole. You just can't act like EVERY other guy out there. It's sad how MOST guys act, and try to pick up girls.
Being 15 and in H.S it's more or less how popular you are, you have to be the alpha male. (something I was not) When I was 20 I changed my ways, my attitude,and my approach. All of this advice will pay off when you are out of school. Not so much now.
From what I see all H.S girls are mostly immature, and there really is no "Type" of guy they are looking for. You just have to stand out. I'm a very nice guy (so I'm told) and I have NO problems with girls/women at all. I win most and lose some. I just move on from the ones that aren't interested. The real kicker is, when I say ok, and leave them alone, they usually come back wanting to be with me, but at that point it's too late. If you go back they will know your a wimp.
Being 15 and in H.S it's more or less how popular you are, you have to be the alpha male. (something I was not) When I was 20 I changed my ways, my attitude,and my approach. All of this advice will pay off when you are out of school. Not so much now.
From what I see all H.S girls are mostly immature, and there really is no "Type" of guy they are looking for. You just have to stand out. I'm a very nice guy (so I'm told) and I have NO problems with girls/women at all. I win most and lose some. I just move on from the ones that aren't interested. The real kicker is, when I say ok, and leave them alone, they usually come back wanting to be with me, but at that point it's too late. If you go back they will know your a wimp.
#30
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this sounds all too familiar to me...
#31
Originally Posted by wndrlst
I agree. Please don't turn into an asshole in a misguided attempt to attract girls. Wouldn't you rather hold out for the one who appreciates a nice guy?
But yes, i do see all your points and i do realize that all might think im too young, but this is also for the future and i thought many other guys get this.
Thanks for all the advise
#33
Team Owner
A girl wrote in my HS yearbook "Please don't change yourself to impress others". Meanwhile what kind of guys do you think she was dating?
#34
Earth-bound misfit
Originally Posted by mystikk
If you're nice, you're boring .. Gotta be a jack of all trades to be a somebody with somebody ..
#35
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Originally Posted by wndrlst
Not to mention intelligent...How is that boring?
#36
failhard.
Originally Posted by wndrlst
Nice doesn't have to be boring. I married the nice one, and he's funny as hell. Not to mention intelligent and athletic. How is that boring? Granted, I dated an asshole or 2, but it gets old really fast. I never let anything go long term with an asshole. In fact, I never slept with one either.
Maybe I should rephrase that to "if you're too nice, you're too boring" though.
#37
Earth-bound misfit
Originally Posted by Python2121
I think you can agree here that intelligent usually means prudent and not doing stupid pointless shit, and girls seem to equate that with boring.
:rethinkingtheintelligentcomment:
#38
Every guy does stupid shit. It's stupid guy things. You can be intelligent and still be immature at the same time. lol
I'm just myself and it seems to work. The way I see it, is a lot of guys put on an act and go out of the way to get in a girls pants. It's sad, and wrong at the same time.
They wouldn't have to work so hard if they would just relax and be themselves. I never understood how some guys think that beeping at, yelling at, or stupid comments will get the girl to want them.
The next girl that you don't want to be "just friends" with make sure you don't put yourself in that position. Have fun, be yourself, and ask her to hangout sometime. If it doesn't work move on and try again.
I'm just myself and it seems to work. The way I see it, is a lot of guys put on an act and go out of the way to get in a girls pants. It's sad, and wrong at the same time.
They wouldn't have to work so hard if they would just relax and be themselves. I never understood how some guys think that beeping at, yelling at, or stupid comments will get the girl to want them.
The next girl that you don't want to be "just friends" with make sure you don't put yourself in that position. Have fun, be yourself, and ask her to hangout sometime. If it doesn't work move on and try again.
#40
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that explains everything