I've been living with my girlfriend at her townhouse for almost a year now and recently, she's becoming more and more bitchy....almost having something to say about everything.

I.e. Today, she complained about me leaving the phone charger still plugged in to charge my old cell phone that I don't use anymore. She said it costs money for the electricity. She also complained about my Maxim, Stuff magazines lying around, asking why I bother keeping them around after I've read through them. She even asked if I got off on them to which I quickly replied "no, because that's what internet porn is for" I told her that I just like having a collection and besides, they were all free subscriptions which have now expired anyway.

It's days like this that I want to leave the relationship for good and start all over. But I'll say that she's also one of a kind. So....what do you guys do to get away from your girl without her taking it to offense? She literally wants to spend all her free time with me since we're both usually busy. Sometimes, I just want some of my free time to myself.

 

Quite cliche, but all it takes is communication. Why don't you try suggesting other hobbies she can enjoy besides spending all her free time with you? Suggest ideas and make her understand that you need free time of your own.

 

I think this is the reason why a lower percentage of couples that cohabitate get married. Any girl you ever meet is going to bitch about things and want to spend most of their time together if you're very close You need to have the committment of marriage to get past the little things.

 

Do what i did.. make a good list and a bad list.. and whichever list is stronger.. wins..

I mean dont go on numbers, if youre pissed you can probably think of 50 bad things and 10 good things, but if the 10 good things are REALLLY good and the 50 bad things are pretty much bullshit then.. well you see where im going with this..

 

that does remind me, my friend/co-worked calls me last night to ask me something about the new server he got and i hear him say "honey im on the phone" he talks for a minute and then i hear her yelling in the background "Honey for the 2nd time im on the phone i'll be with you in a minute" and then i hear even louder yelling in the background... which is followed by "dude, never get married"...

And another thing I forgot to mention earlier is when women tend to find and complain about little things, all the time, they are either A> bitches and will never change or B> they are hiding a different issue that they dont want to talk about so their frustration comes out in little bullshit like your recharger incident..

 

Everyone gets like this after being "stuck" together sometimes. Setting yourself free sometimes seems like a good idea, but do you love each other? Are you seeing yourself together? If she starts bickering about things and ranting for no understood reason, just ask her to talk about what's going on in her head. Ask her if there's something wrong, or something she'd like to get off her chest. People (especially women that love to talk) love to get their ego stroked. If after this, you don't think it's working any better, well, there's the alternative...


Then again, does she like anal? Things can workout...

 

We get the free Maxim/Stuff/FHM subscriptions at our house. Surprisingly, it's me who reads them, and not the hubby. What you are seeing is typical of long-term, committed relationships: when you start being a "collective whole," a woman takes a self-interest in your daily habits, individual lifestyle, etc. A relationship grows by learning to iron out the differences and learning to accept each other's failings as part of who they are.

 

My gf and I have discussed the topic and after she finishes college in the spring, we've decided to not live together, for the moment. We agreed that we both needed to spend some time on our own before we moved in together, even though we're pretty committed to the relationship.

Regardless, my personal feeling is that before getting married, I would like to live with the person I'm getting married to see if we would really be able to live with each other every day for the rest of our lives without wanting to wring each other's necks.

 

I sort of live with my girlfriend, we have our own apartments with our own roommates but we're are always at each others places. We talked about living together next year, but figured it'll be best to just have our "own" place. So we still have to option of having our times alone.

I understand where you're coming from though. Usually when my girlfriend and I argue about something we just go off on our own for a while come back talk about it and problem settled. After using that approach we get into less nit pixky fights.

 

i think its a plain headache when u live with ur gf..

 

right on...there was an good social study that showed that bf/gf who lived together had a much higher divorce rate.

 

Rice we have allready established that you are not a typical woman and your man is lucky..

 

No kidding. I wish there were more women like you. The world would be a happier place. I know I would be at least. Not to say that I want a woman who is submissive, but I'd like a girl who can respect my space and let me do what I want without complaining. I think that is reasonable so long as what I do does not interfere with her.

I.e. -- watching porn, etc. .....most girls I know don't like their bf doing this. What is so wrong with it?

I.e. -- having a messy place.....what is wrong with this? believe it or not, that's just the way I organize my stuff

 

well, thank you for the compliment but the thing that I have that makes me "atypical" is simply age and experience, which translates into realism and acceptance w/r/t relationships and people. To be fair, I do complain about things, and sure we have our disagreements but people who love each other passionately and bring their own individual likes/dislikes and personality traits will disagree.

A lot of women translate "needing your own space" and watching porn to a rejection of them personally. Although this is probably not intended by you, that's what it translates to, and I am guilty as charged on several occasions in the past. It took me a while to figure out that porn was just something that most guys enjoy, and really nothing more (ok, maybe a little more ) and unless it was watched an unreasonable amount, really didn't impact my relationship negatively. In fact, sometimes it has helped it.

 

asian al bundy....

 

Hmmm... I think I heard something about that before. I'll take the opposite perspective though - living together first is "the test" as to whether you can stand each other for many years to come Maybe those couples don't get married because they shouldn't

I passed the test ... but I'll admit, it was really rough at first. The first year we lived together we almost didn't make it, and that was after years of dating.

 

Mmmm... my foot...

http://marriage.about.com/cs/cohabit...ve+in+together

Maybe the reasons are religious? More devout people are less likely to live together, AND less likely to consider divorce??


note: there are a lot of one-sided analyses on the web about this issue, but the facts seem to support whar xizor and matelot said

 

Clutch, who doesn't want to live with his gf before he's married to her.

 

Don't get me wrong dude, there are some pros with living with your girlfriend. For one, you can save on apartment rent. Granted that I'm paying her some rent, it's not as much as it would be had I rented alone. And no, I don't like having roommates. Besides, I spend so much time at her place, it wouldn't make sense not to move in.

Waking up and finding her next to you is a big plus too. I definitely like to cuddle before sleeping (sorry for the details), but it's also a big plus.

The only con really is that you don't have a remote control to turn her off when you need to.

 

Maybe the problem is your gf's too smart for you:

Brainy women face handicap in marriage stakes: British survey

Sun Jan 2, 3:43 PM ET


LONDON (AFP) - A high IQ is a hindrance for women wanting to get married while it is an asset for men, according to a study by four British universities published in The Sunday Times newspaper.


The study found the likelihood of marriage increased by 35 percent for boys for each 16-point increase in IQ.


But for girls, there is a 40-percent drop for each 16-point rise, according to the survey by the universities of Aberdeen, Bristol, Edinburgh and Glasgow.


The study is based on the IQs of 900 men and women between their 10th and 40th birthdays.


"Women in their late 30s who have gone for careers after the first flush of university and who are among the brightest of their generation are finding that men are just not interesting enough," said psychologist and professor at Nottingham University Paul Brown in The Sunday Times.


Claire Rayner, writer and broadcaster, said in the article that intelligent men often prefered a less brainy partner.


"A chap with a high IQ is going to get a demanding job that is going to take up a lot of his energy and time. In many ways he wants a woman who is an old-fashioned wife and looks after the home, a copy of his mum in a way."

 

.............she doesn't have one for you, either............

 

i live w/ my fiancee. works out nicely

 

Yes. She's attached to the end of my arm.


Ewwww.

 

Mine too, although it cleans up real nice.

My stuff is organized in ascending chronological order. The oldest things are at the bottom of the pile.


Oh, and no GF ever lives with me because I'm a royal smart-ass. I have been known to drive women nuts (one even went to the funny farm) within 1 week.

 

Oh, I'm not saying there's no benefits to living together. There definitely are (most tangibly the rent savings). But for me, I don't think the benefits outweigh the cost of not being able to escape to my own personal space. It's not that I think it's wrong or anything, I just don't want to.

 

I dont. We both need our space.