Cheaters?
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Safety Car
Joined: Jun 2004
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From: Northern Virginia
Cheaters?
Do they cheat because they aren't with the right person, and so they go elsewhere to try and find what they think is missing? Or do they cheat because thats just the type of person they are, i.e. no matter who they are with, the thought of cheating will always be in their heads. Or is it totally something else that I haven't touched on? I'm interested to hear people's thoughts on this.
One on the right for me
Joined: Jul 2004
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From: Bay Area, CA
I think it depends on the age. I know a lot of my friends didn't want to be tied down in a relationship at a young age (15/16/17) so they explored more than they should have with other people.
All but one of them has since had a steady girlfriend and hasn't cheated. The other - well, I think it is just in his head.
Probably a little of all- some people never will, others will want to, and some will, regardless of what type of relationship they are in.
All but one of them has since had a steady girlfriend and hasn't cheated. The other - well, I think it is just in his head.
Probably a little of all- some people never will, others will want to, and some will, regardless of what type of relationship they are in.
Suzuka Master
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From: MD
Guys do because they just lust after women and just want something different to bang.
Girls do because something is missing emotionally and they need to fill the empty spaces.
In both cases i'd say it shows insecurity because they don't have enough balls to declare yourself single before they know they're gonna creep.
Girls do because something is missing emotionally and they need to fill the empty spaces.
In both cases i'd say it shows insecurity because they don't have enough balls to declare yourself single before they know they're gonna creep.
Senior Moderator
Joined: May 2003
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From: Better Neighborhood, Arizona
Originally Posted by Mike97 3.0P
Guys do because they just lust after women and just want something different to bang.
Girls do because something is missing emotionally and they need to fill the empty spaces.
In both cases i'd say it shows insecurity because they don't have enough balls to declare yourself single before they know they're gonna creep.
Girls do because something is missing emotionally and they need to fill the empty spaces.
In both cases i'd say it shows insecurity because they don't have enough balls to declare yourself single before they know they're gonna creep.
1919
Joined: Mar 2005
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Originally Posted by Shadzilla
Do they cheat because they aren't with the right person, and so they go elsewhere to try and find what they think is missing? Or do they cheat because thats just the type of person they are, i.e. no matter who they are with, the thought of cheating will always be in their heads. Or is it totally something else that I haven't touched on? I'm interested to hear people's thoughts on this.
This is my belief. That's why I have never and will never get involved with a known cheater on any level. Nor would I stay with someone who cheated on me.
Not having enough self-control to stay faithful just seems pathetic to me.
I make Boom Boom in
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From: Texas
They cheat because of the chase/game, to see if they still have "it," they are bored in their current relationship, looking for something that is currently missing in their current relationship, or the idea that the "grass is greener on the other side."
Maybe b/c it's available.
I quote: "A man is only as faithful as his options."
Maybe b/c it's available.
I quote: "A man is only as faithful as his options."
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Luckiest Man on Earth.
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From: DXVIII, NY
Originally Posted by Mike97 3.0P
Guys do because they just lust after women and just want something different to bang.
Girls do because something is missing emotionally and they need to fill the empty spaces.
In both cases i'd say it shows insecurity because they don't have enough balls to declare yourself single before they know they're gonna creep.
Girls do because something is missing emotionally and they need to fill the empty spaces.
In both cases i'd say it shows insecurity because they don't have enough balls to declare yourself single before they know they're gonna creep.
On the way!
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From: Orlando, FL
Originally Posted by Scottman111
This is my belief. That's why I have never and will never get involved with a known cheater on any level. Nor would I stay with someone who cheated on me.
Not having enough self-control to stay faithful just seems pathetic to me.
Not having enough self-control to stay faithful just seems pathetic to me.
Crabcakes and Football!!!
Joined: Sep 2004
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From: Everywhere on the East Coast
I'm with Mikey. I still cant fathom why if you claim you love someone or even just care for them remotely the notion of cheating comes up. I know from expirience its a lot easier to know its not working and end it rather then be sneaking around. I cant stand liars and cheaters. Once a cheater always a cheater
Originally Posted by Mike97 3.0P
Guys do because they just lust after women and just want something different to bang.
Girls do because something is missing emotionally and they need to fill the empty spaces.
In both cases i'd say it shows insecurity because they don't have enough balls to declare yourself single before they know they're gonna creep.
Girls do because something is missing emotionally and they need to fill the empty spaces.
In both cases i'd say it shows insecurity because they don't have enough balls to declare yourself single before they know they're gonna creep.
Crabcakes and Football!!!
Joined: Sep 2004
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From: Everywhere on the East Coast
Also I think for girls, pretty much in the college age, its "cool" to sleep around. I think they're somewhat locked down living at home, hit college and try to bang it all out and sample all the flavors on the testosterone menu before settling down. I hear chicks brag about who and how many people theyve slept with. Pathetic
I hear chicks brag about who and how many people theyve slept with. Pathetic
Suzuka Master
Joined: Jan 2005
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I dunno, but if I was in a position where I wanted to cheat, I'd at least break it off with the other person first. I figure you owe them that much.
Those who do it because the can, or because they can't control themselves, should not be trusted in the future.
Mike
Those who do it because the can, or because they can't control themselves, should not be trusted in the future.
Mike
...I like stories...
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From: Boston Metro
Once a player always a player...
Every single one of my buddies who played when we were "young" is still cheating today on his wife and kids. 
To me it seems like a drug addiction almost from the outside looking in: these guys have always attracted women and don't have the will-power to say no when approached.
I personally never had their problem so I can't say practically that I would say no either, although I hope that if that were ever to happen (at 45 years not likely) that I'd say "thanks but I'm married".
G
To me it seems like a drug addiction almost from the outside looking in: these guys have always attracted women and don't have the will-power to say no when approached. I personally never had their problem so I can't say practically that I would say no either, although I hope that if that were ever to happen (at 45 years not likely) that I'd say "thanks but I'm married".
G
One on the right for me
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From: Bay Area, CA
Originally Posted by crazymjb
I dunno, but if I was in a position where I wanted to cheat, I'd at least break it off with the other person first. I figure you owe them that much.
Those who do it because the can, or because they can't control themselves, should not be trusted in the future.
Mike
Those who do it because the can, or because they can't control themselves, should not be trusted in the future.
Mike
If they are in another country you might not be able to do it that easily.
Its also an age thing.
Moderator
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From: Not Las Vegas (SF Bay Area)
Originally Posted by michimonster
Also I think for girls, pretty much in the college age, its "cool" to sleep around. I think they're somewhat locked down living at home, hit college and try to bang it all out and sample all the flavors on the testosterone menu before settling down. I hear chicks brag about who and how many people theyve slept with. Pathetic
I hear chicks brag about who and how many people theyve slept with. Pathetici wish i could meet some girls like that at my college
holy crap this is my 5000th post !!!
Men are dogs, animal instingt is the reason, and its noit a choice to cheat, its a choice to try to not cheat. I see alot of ladies I would love to screw, and wonder how good a screw they are, but its hard to actually follow thru and set it up when you really love someone.
Good way to not cheat is to rub one out when you feel like its gonna happen, lol.
Good way to not cheat is to rub one out when you feel like its gonna happen, lol.
Thread Starter
Safety Car
Joined: Jun 2004
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From: Northern Virginia
Originally Posted by rondog
Good way to not cheat is to rub one out when you feel like its gonna happen, lol.
Its never a good idea to leave the house with a loaded weapon 
The Boss
Joined: Apr 2006
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From: New Jack City
Originally Posted by Shadzilla
Do they cheat because they aren't with the right person, and so they go elsewhere to try and find what they think is missing? Or do they cheat because thats just the type of person they are, i.e. no matter who they are with, the thought of cheating will always be in their heads. Or is it totally something else that I haven't touched on? I'm interested to hear people's thoughts on this.
"L-I-V-I-N"
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From: Houston
Every cheater I know, both guys and girls, and some are my best friends, cheats again. No matter how much they say they "love" who they are with, how well the relationship is going, or how much time they spend with them, they end up cheating again in their next relationship(s). I've never cheated and never would; you don't really know until the option to cheat with a person you find very attractive is laid at your feet in a situation where you could get away with it. Happened to me, didn't do it, actually feel pretty damn good about that.
Pro
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From: Here
I think for some people, it's a habit. They don't know how not to cheat. I also agree that some peope do it just to see if they still have what it takes to catch the opposite sex. Some people want to already have someone available in case their current relationship doesn't work out, even if at the time it is going well.
Instructor
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Originally Posted by crazymjb
The person is sleeping with someone other than their significant other unbenounced to their significant other.
Mike
Mike
Haha! Sorry about not being clear in the least
I meant signs as in "how do you know if your SO is cheating?" not as in "what is the definition of cheating?"
Suzuka Master
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From: D.istrict of C.orruption
Originally Posted by RLToni
Haha! Sorry about not being clear in the least I meant signs as in "how do you know if your SO is cheating?" not as in "what is the definition of cheating?"
I meant signs as in "how do you know if your SO is cheating?" not as in "what is the definition of cheating?"
Thread Starter
Safety Car
Joined: Jun 2004
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From: Northern Virginia
Well, when I asked this question, I kind of left the "definition of cheating" up to the individual. I think most everyone would consider sleeping with another person cheating. Some people would consider kissing another person cheating. Hell I have a buddy who won't go to the strip club because he feels seing another girl naked is cheating. So I guess really its up to the individual.
Thread Starter
Safety Car
Joined: Jun 2004
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From: Northern Virginia
Also, I saw this on AOL today, ties in with this thread perfectly:
Four Reasons Why a Man Might Cheat
Cheat and get caught and you'll pay the price, which is often the severing of a longstanding and loving relationship. Why take that risk?
Not that this excuses him in any way, but here are four reasons a man might give to justify cheating on his wife, according to Men's Health editor-in-chief David Zinczenko, who is also the author of 'Men, Love & Sex: The Complete User's Guide for Women' and 'The Abs Diet' series of books.
1. To fulfill his biology
It's Darwinian! "A man's main job, besides killing the saber-tooth, is to spread his seed in order to ensure the survival of his genetic legacy," says Zinczenko. "It's a man's biology to want to wander." Of course, he's quick to point out that doesn't mean men should wander. Still, the biological urge will be strong.
2. To get attention
Some men cheat because they aren't having frequent sex at home, but others who do have frequent sex at home still cheat. Why? "Because cheating isn't just about the sex," asserts Zinczenko. "Just as a woman who cheats may be seeking more affection than she's getting at home, a man often cheats because he's seeking the attention that he no longer gets at home." A new woman has a certain allure and mystery. Add to that a bit of flirtatious seduction, and many men just can't resist -- no matter how good they have it at home.
3. To get out
Some men want to get out of their marriage, but they don't have the guts to properly end it. So they cheat in an attempt to drive their wife away. For some men, "the only way out is to commit the relationship sin that drives a woman away for good. It's not right, but it's what happens," admits Zinczenko.
4. To change up his play list
File this under excitement. A long and loving marriage is often about comfortable routine. For some men, that routine may be boring. A new relationship adds zing and spice to life. Take heart, wives. "What men really want in relationships (and what I suspect women also want) is to be able to take comfort in the routine of a long-term commitment, as long as there are some surprises that make it feel like a new relationship every once in a while," asserts Zinczenko.
Cheat and get caught and you'll pay the price, which is often the severing of a longstanding and loving relationship. Why take that risk?
Not that this excuses him in any way, but here are four reasons a man might give to justify cheating on his wife, according to Men's Health editor-in-chief David Zinczenko, who is also the author of 'Men, Love & Sex: The Complete User's Guide for Women' and 'The Abs Diet' series of books.
1. To fulfill his biology
It's Darwinian! "A man's main job, besides killing the saber-tooth, is to spread his seed in order to ensure the survival of his genetic legacy," says Zinczenko. "It's a man's biology to want to wander." Of course, he's quick to point out that doesn't mean men should wander. Still, the biological urge will be strong.
2. To get attention
Some men cheat because they aren't having frequent sex at home, but others who do have frequent sex at home still cheat. Why? "Because cheating isn't just about the sex," asserts Zinczenko. "Just as a woman who cheats may be seeking more affection than she's getting at home, a man often cheats because he's seeking the attention that he no longer gets at home." A new woman has a certain allure and mystery. Add to that a bit of flirtatious seduction, and many men just can't resist -- no matter how good they have it at home.
3. To get out
Some men want to get out of their marriage, but they don't have the guts to properly end it. So they cheat in an attempt to drive their wife away. For some men, "the only way out is to commit the relationship sin that drives a woman away for good. It's not right, but it's what happens," admits Zinczenko.
4. To change up his play list
File this under excitement. A long and loving marriage is often about comfortable routine. For some men, that routine may be boring. A new relationship adds zing and spice to life. Take heart, wives. "What men really want in relationships (and what I suspect women also want) is to be able to take comfort in the routine of a long-term commitment, as long as there are some surprises that make it feel like a new relationship every once in a while," asserts Zinczenko.
Instructor
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From: Connecticut
my girlfriend goes to college in minnesota and i'm going to school in CT so I always have the cheating issue on my mind. i personally would never do it i think its one of the worse things you could do to another person but i always wonder about her b/c she has made out with another guy. she said he forced himself on her when she was at a party and i consider kissing cheating. long distance relationships are the worst when it comes to cheating and i think because they are so much work it drives some to cheat.