Rapture

I never understood the whole "I used to like you, but I got over those feelings long ago. You should have told me sooner" thing. Seems to me if that was the case you would have noticed something, right?

I mean Iunno, maybe it's moreso something to further validate her lack of feelings towards you? But then again, if I found out a girl liked me, but kept completely silent about it, bottled up her emotions, and just got over me without even so much as a subtle hint, I think I'd have no problem getting over her as well

leedogg

I think you should take advantage of the situation. You've already admitted you liked her, now turn it into playful banter. plead for a kiss or a feel, tell her she doesnt know what she's missing, pretend like she's stabbed you in the heart and you have nothing to live for now.

justnspace

iTrader: (1)

^agreed, Be cocky about it!!!!!

YeuEmMaiMai

EvilVirus

iTrader: (8)

^lmfao

Majofo

timecop

At least I'm keeping up with my thread weekly. I'm trying not to be the OP that opens a thread and never responds lol Well now for some replies:

lol thanks, but I'll keep her number to myself for now :P

Yeah, I have a feeling I'm always just going to stay friends with her and probably end up with someone else...but she'll always be that first girl I actually really liked...I'm pretty sure I'll never do the whole how about now thing. I'm not that weird/needy lol

I'll check it out this weekend. I'll tell ya what I think when I see it haha

Appreciate it. Not a baseball fan, but the analogy works (with some googling)

Yeah, my friends say something along the lines of what you just said. They joke sometimes by saying I'm in the "acquittance zone" b/c I never talk to her about relationships...like boyfriends, dates etc.

I don't feel like that's going on, and I definitely don't want to lose her as a friend. I'm a pretty weird guy in IRL (or I try to be) and she was willing to talk with me when we worked together, so I don't think it's the ego thing...could be wrong tho

Thanks for the advice (and I like your avatar). I definitely wanna still be friends with her, but obviously I wouldn't let her use me. If that day ever comes, I'll know I couldn't be friends w/ her.

Yeah, my friends said something similar. Thanks for the advice!

I've seen some local news stuff on that book...isn't that like basically an erotic novel for women?

I'll definitely try to be more confident. But I don't think I will "reek" enuf to attract the other women around me...I'm normal looking, ask justnspace

I can actually tell you why I didn't notice, b/c I did think back to it. For the first year I knew her, her and I were good friends...even to me. Then I took her out to watch Inception with some friends, and I remember turning and looking t her and thinking "crap, when did that happen". So looking back at that first year, I remember her asking various questions like: "What would you do if that guy came up to me and asked me out right in front of you" And at the time, I think I said I wouldn't do anything b/c...I didn't care :/

Playful banter is not really my cup of tea, but I'll give it a whirl if the opportunity ever comes up.

97BlackAckCL

iTrader: (6)

:theghey:

timecop

lol a picture's worth a thousand words I guess...for the last one tho, I'm pretty sure I face-palmed myself when I realized what I had done. I do appreciate the advice you gave me 97BlackAckCL

justnspace

iTrader: (1)

timecop is extra handsome.

Scottman111

Cool!


Now edit him out of the picture and post it

Majofo

timecop

Gracias (Quagmire not required lol)

Yeah right lol

Anyway, I did call her this weekend, and we just had a normal conversation. What I said a few weeks back was looming in my head, but she didn't mention it. So I assume our freindship is normal at least.

TeknoKing

yep you are in frined zone, a normal platonic freindship.

aznboi2424

iTrader: (10)

Ah well, can't win them all. At least you know how she feels without wondering about it over and over. This will actually help you get over your romantic feelings for her. Just focus on building a good friendship with her and start chasing more tail.

cM3go

Having busted out of the friend zone there is a chance... it will just take time. Has she seen/heard about you dating other girls? If she hasn't there will come a time where you can talk about other girls or how you want to date a certain girl, and even if said girl is responsive to you and your friend sees it, her switch might flip and she will want you.

I pursued a girl who was my friend for quite some time and no matter how much I tried she just wasn't having it. So I just let up and let it be. Eventually I started talking about other girls and all she saw was a picture of me and another girl holding hands and she instantly came to me, said she wanted to be with me because she realized she didn't want to share me with another girl.

You never know, friend zone is definitely a breakable barrier.

TeknoKing

^ sorry, but that's a shitty reaction. A person was interested in you only after she had a chance of losing you? And you want to be with that?

timecop

Indeed I am...it sucks here lol

Yeah, I'm glad we're still friends. And there are plenty of girls out there (work and school) I kinda find attractive/interesting. We'll see what happens.

I used to date someone in high school (prom, etc etc). College kinda got between us, but we've been friends forever and she lives in CA working for Google now...so she's not an option anymore.
She's seen texts/pics/facebook from other girls who wanted to hang out. I never really tried anything with them b/c she was the one I liked...so there's that road...

That's what I thought, but there's a girl in our office who's about 4 years older than me (she's like 25-ish now). She mentioned how she didn't start liking her male bff until after he got a gf. It's weird, but maybe it's a girl thing?

97BlackAckCL

iTrader: (6)

ding ding ding

they like the idea of keeping you on a string as a back up option, only when someone else becomes competition do they ever start to care or notice

PyroDave

Girls want what other girls want, it's a prize thing. Why do some guys want a Porsche? Because a lot of guys want a Porsche! If nobody cared about Porsches, no matter how nice, there would be a much small demand from those who know nothing about the car. Girls don't often know much about cars, so why do they like Benz, BMW, Audi? Because thats what others who do know about it want. Girls aren't afraid of losing a guy until they are losing him, and only begin to want him when others want him

TeknoKing

So my question again, why would you want a girlfriend like that does not see your potential when you are available and once you are gone; now she thinks she wants you? It's because she does not want to be alone?

An example, you got a Pontiac Aztec parked by your work. It is a work car. You can careless for it. You don't find it appealing, but it's there and once in a while you can use to do some errands, but mostly you ignore it, you rather walk, take public transport and use another vehicle. And all of a sudden, the Pontiac is gone. OMG, now you regret that you haven't' driven it enough...

So my question, if the Pontiac ever returns, you would do what? Say how much you miss it, and begin neglecting it all over again? Who needs this? Why waste your time on a person who either is playing game or just does not think of you. Don't waste your precious time on a person who does not want to spend theirs on you.

sixsixfour

technically you didnt break through the friend zone. she fished you out from the bottom of the barrel. she kept you there (i.e. "how much you tried she wasnt having it") but when her options were drying up (i.e. picture of another girl having you) she immediately picked you from cold storage. if anything thats more of an insult. and if you succumb to that, then my friend there goes your self-respect out the window. she just wants you now because you were her backup, plain and simple. she strung you along and if a better option came she'd leave you out in the cold.

never settle to be second fiddle.



amen brother.

TLDude876

iTrader: (7)

troof!

timecop

It seems so, but I want to say that's she's not that kind of girl...I could be wrong tho :/

I like the way you put that. Obviously I'm not gonna go out with a girl just to get her...but it would be an interesting plan just to see if that were the case in that situation.

True...but we don't even know if she's that girl. If it ends up that she is that girl, I'll be disappointed but I'll be pathetic enuf to take the opportunity to be with her (sad but true)

leedogg

Sometimes people dont realize what they want or how they feel until they can no longer have it.

97BlackAckCL

iTrader: (6)

Rapture

True, but if someone is so adamant that they want no romantic involvement with you, then it's kind of hard to believe they just didn't realize that you were such a total catch.

1Louder

This borders on alarming. If this is your real attitide about your place in that relationship, she is the wrong girl. And it might not be because of her - it could be because of the pedistal you've put her on. But any relationship with her is doomed if you play the role of the underdog boyfriend who's lucky to have her.

The right girl looks like this: She can't imagine a future without you in it. She feels blessed to have you in her life. You bring out the best in her, and the worst of her doesn't scare you off. She'll have your back no matter what. She's your best friend. She celebrates with you in success and supports you in defeat. She stays with you even when you don't deserve her. And here's the key: you feel every one of those things for her.

That's the right girl. Now quit wasting your time on the internet go find her.

timecop

Sorry for the late replies...was stuck in a conference last week and I was too lazy afterwards to touch a computer haha


Which really sucks...but that's how life goes I guess :/

That's what I thought. Because this girl in my office didn't even care about him until after he got the gf...then all of a sudden she just realized he was perfect...

That is the right girl indeed. And I know the girl I like probably doesn't feel that way about me...so I kinda feel like it wouldn't work out. But I would of liked the chance to make her feel that way about me and rely on me like that. We sorta have it, but it's def not to that level.
I did meet a girl last week when I was on travel in Utah. We hung out for the week, but it wasn't gonna work b/c she goes to school in CA (but I'm in the DMV). But she was pretty awesome...kinda normal ,yet crazy...a good combo lol

justnspace

iTrader: (1)

start fuxxing other chixx.

97BlackAckCL

iTrader: (6)

So is this chick still in Pittsburgh?

TeknoKing

maybe hypnotizing may work for you?

Stare at this for a few minutes. Keep hands where we all can see them.

Subliminal message here is to move on...woooo.....on...move...on...yes.

EvilVirus

iTrader: (8)

damn look at that culo and you guys can insert some other comment cause i am fapping

cM3go

I can't help the fact that most women are unreasonable and have a twisted view of how reality works. But I guess that makes them women!

EvilVirus

iTrader: (8)

^that is so true but hey we cant live without them and they cant pee standing................or can they?

Majofo

That ass... must. resist. fucking. screen.

Mr Marco

Rapture

Wow, you managed to make me both agree and disagree with you. Wtf.

HBaJ

OP I feel for you. Friend zone is a tough spot to be in. May seem like everybody's coming down hard on you but look at it from the outside in here. These "weekly" phone calls about movies and whatever else are further cementing you into your spot. You're basically the gay friend at this point (no offense). You either gotta cut the chats down or switch up the topics, sounds wrong but as cM3go stated thats just how women work.
Growing up I was the friend zone kid, luckily I've come around and hooked up with all said friends, all it takes is some loosening up on your end (booze helps ) and a little convincing. Let her go for now, hook up with some other girls and build some confidence, seems evident by your timidness that you're lacking it. Who knows by the time you've completed this self-esteem makeover you might have moved onto somebody else without trying.

timecop

Sorry for the late replies again guys! I was in UT 2 weeks ago, and classes started back again last week...so I've been busy lol

No, she left about 2 weeks ago...she's back to school in DC again. When she came back, I had to go to UT for work...so I didn't get to talk to her when she was in MD
I haven't really spoken to her since the last time I mentioned I talked to her in this thread...I'll prob call her sometime this week to just say hi

My gosh that's all powerful! The girl I like has nothing on this chick lol

Thanks! Nah, everything everyone said makes sense. In the back of my head, I always knew I was becoming the gay friend (no offense). Which is why I went to AZ for an outside perspective. I did decide to cut the talks down, I haven't spoken to her in a few weeks...so like I said above, I'll call her and see what's up. I did meet a girl at the conefernce I attened for work in UT...didn't hook up, but it was a nice change of pace not thinking about the girl I like and just "connecting" with this other girl. (no pix...saying it in advance haha)