I'm trying to figure out if its just UF or the places I try to meet girls, but it seems like finding a girl for a long term relationship at 21 is just a waste these days. Every girl I meet always has some complication, such as they are interested but still too much into their ex-boyfriend etc. At such a young age these girls are full of baggage it seems. Not to mention where has sincere kidness, honesty, respect, and reliability gone these days? Seems like you can't trust these girls at all. Its hard to meet girls in big classes with limited group work, and I'm guessing that probably where I might find a good one, but sorry for the rant, it just seems the quality of people these days are going downhill.

 

i blame it on media/tv shows. women like lindsay lohan and the rest of them should be thrown in iraq for a proper reality check. stupid shows like "the real housewives of oc" and the like mess girls up young.

its only gonna get worse from here on.

 

a few years ago... I got to know this guy from the gym, he was from Florida... really cool guy... wasn't bad looking, tall, obviously worked out, so he was pretty built... we hung out a couple times... anyway, he had the hardest time out here in Southern California meeting girls... He'd go up to them at clubs and social gatherings... and tried all kinds of different approach... and nothing worked. He used to whine how the girls out here are so damn uptight...

Anyway, it's a little veering off your subject of "quality girls" but my point is... at least out in Florida... you can still approach them (even if they got baggage), out here they'll have the baggage AND the fucking attitude...

The guy, (can't remember his name) ended up moving back to Florida...

 

Girls at UF always seem to be hooked on the ex, i dont understand it. A girl i dated for most of college at UF cheated on me so we broke up and now she wont leave me alone and the girl I dated after my ex (also went to UF) is hooked on her ex bf. I swear all of my friends have the same problem

 

I suspect your observation is correct. Even when I was 21 most weren't into being with one guy. Most of the ones that said they were into one guy were getting side salami. Most women don't seem to settle down until they decide that they want babies.

 

"You need to quit putting the pussy on a pedestal."





In all seriousness, I agree with you. I moved to Florida last July and it amazes me how much baggage most of the girls down here carry (not to mention the good ones I have found date some of the biggest d-bags I have ever seen in my life).

 

I don't think what you're observing is a "Florida" thing. The trend of our entire culture over the last 15-20 years has to become very self-focused. Everything is about me, what makes me uncomfortable, what makes me happy, what I want. Decisions are based largely on the impact to oneself. Don't get me wrong here - not trying to slam this generation or over-generalize, just an observation on our culture. But folks your age have been raised in this type of environment and to certain degrees are a product of it. Not saying all are like that, but if you notice the trend too maybe there is an underlying cause bigger than hang-ups over the last boyfriend.

By the way, IMHO some form of selfishness is the reason why 90% of relationships end.

Anyway, maybe you might try other places where the women may have developed stronger "sense of others" skills. Volunteer organizations, youth groups, clubs with some kind of cause, etc. Also, the older you get the more women you'll meet who are beyond that stage and you'll have more luck.

 

^ I agree with a lot of these points. In a relationship setting, I am only interested in what works for "us". I am about equality and reciprocity. My lady is ever my equal, and is made to feel that way. The only woman she needs to fear is the one in the mirror, as she is the only one that can make her an "ex".

If you want to dump on the women for slacking on being virtuous, how about re-examining the roads leading up to the untimely demise of the "virtuous" woman?

Were they sorely beset by selfish men, who did not do their part in the home? Did the women get fed up and decide to go for self after being left to fend for themselves? I am not putting everyone in this category, but you know if you fit. Does this mean that women don't cheat, and does it mean that all women did their part in the home? No, and arguments on both sides will always result in which came first the chicken or the egg? While we gather here to lament aloud...so do they...

 

Just use an online dating service... worked for a few friends of mine that are pretty rough around the edges. I haven't been "available" since 92 (before Al Gore invented the Internet), but I'd do it if I was looking. Either that, or I always figrued Borders Books would be a good place to meet someone who might actually be normal. Easy to strike up a convo and you can always move to the coffee shop if you hit it off.

 

Online dating at 21 probably wouldnt bring many prospects I'd imagine.

 

every girl around this age has baggage, i've been dealing with this one girl and everyday it's a different story, and well last night she crossed the line. so today i pretty much told her to get fucked. i'm so sick of the bullshit they play, honestly and it fucking blows. fuck bitch's make money and work for yourself, the right girl may come around........sry for being a little pissed but well i'm just sick of the bullshit and a bit aggravated because all i was good to her and understood her but yet she decides to really fuck it up.

 

It's def. the "reality" TV shows.. And I feel ya. Women these days....

 

it is what it is

you just have to keep sifting

 

Your Young...nothing you get into will be all that serious even if it is long term

my cousin said at his 30th birthday: when you start losing your hair you should probably propose to your "best option"

It hasnt been said yet so let it come from a lady...When you least expect it, whatever it is your looking for will eventually appear.

Anyways...this epidemic seems to be the consensus no matter where you live. And In my opinion, it goes both ways therefore it is the same for some of us ladies.

 

You ladies had feminism and the outright rejection of femininity.

Men did not have their masculinism and the outright rejection of masculinity.

Women have more masculine traits today then ever. I like to hold, protect, and make love to a young woman, not a masculine female. Feminism is taught to be OK, without consequence, and taboo to criticize.

So over the course of a few decades you have higher divorce rates, STDs, abortions, etc. All because of the breakdown of the traditional nuclear family with its respective gender roles. And gender roles aren't really roles, they're what is natural, and maybe even spiritual, and at the core of our being. An academic approach, hell bent on the destruction of traditional roles, is not the discussion that should be had or force fed down the throats of young people. Androgyny should not be celebrated.

 

Hmm...androgyny indeed...lol...Like myself, you are always one to take the direct approach (way to rock playboy)...

I would be inclined to agree on a couple of these points. While I believe that a household where the single woman is left to fend for the young is a home fully capable of begatting healthy individuals, it is not tantamount to the ideal structure of a home, and is as such an acephalous household. Women believe that they don't need a man when it comes to the teachings of a young man, but that is not true. All tools are not of an academic nature, and some are innate or instinctive. Much like a mother and her daughter. So yes, we do have inherent roles to play in the make-up of a traditional home.

Having said that, my life and the way I lead it is NOT societal in nature. I have always bucked the trend, and could care less what the mainstream dictates as an acceptable "individual". If a woman adopts such an approach, so be it. But if it is not to my liking...I merely "sift" til I find one that is...

 

I'm sure this kind of stuff (just in different forms) has been going on for thousands and thousands of years.

Basically it all boils down to, "you either play or get played." At least at your age anyway.

 

"All girls are hookers, except your mother and your sister, but don't ask your father."

 

http://www.iamfreetonight.com/

but seriously dude. if your 21 you dont need a long term relationship. you still have alot of fuckin around to do before you start thinking of marriage. and by fuckin around i mean being young and doing things that you wont be able to when you get older. just remember no matter how perfect your girl is someone out there is tired of her shit. and if you want to marry a chick. marry one that has a good mix of everything. one that will be a good wife not a trophy. youll jsut get taken to the cleaners

 

wow amisconception i could not agree with you more. There has to be a natural order.

 

While the quality of girls have come down - men have to be blamed partially for it.

Do conservative, fun, down to earth girls snap guy's necks? Hell no. Everytime Ive gone to a bar with my buddies its always the same routine. They stare at/hit on:

1) The hot ones
2) The hot ones who will give them the time of day
3) The decent looking ones dressed up like the hot ones who give them the time of day

Same song, different tune. If youre younger and interested in "settling down" you dont need "group work" to do it. Casual conversation will lead somewhere if the chick is interested, casual conversation with OTHER chicks youre not interested in helps too.

I was friends with my boyfriend of 4 years before we started dating and you notice which guy respects the girls and which guys are the D.B.s to stay the heck away from.

 

I think you may be correct OP. I've been out of the dating scene for a while, but what I remembered of my mid to late 20's was that the younger women seem to have a ton of baggage.

Teens now-a-days are trying to grow up so quickly that by the time they are 20, they have experienced more than women in their 30's would have a generation ago. It's sad to think that a lot of 17 year old girls have probably had more partners than their moms. And a lot of them do not have the maturity to deal with it.

 

Conservative and fun is usually an oxymoron.

Women who are conservative are notorious for not being able to loosen up (not to be confused with easy) and have a good time because they are worried about how they appear or have ventured too far from the"circle" or "fun bunch of people" to maintain a connection. So withdrawn is more likely their learned reflex when it comes to crowds. A guy probably thinks that it takes too much to get you going fun-wise, whereas the hot chick is the life of the party because she is constantly thrust into the limelight. There are a lot of women who dress and act conservatively that are actually hot underneath the glasses and corporate ensemble. But the world may never know because they either forgot how to, or won't let their hair down...

But that flirtatious, buxom beauty across the way has her hair down both literally and figuratively when she comes thru the door and the eccentric will always catch the eyes of the masses. Whether it's a dish on a plate or a pair of stilettos! Those who have an aggressive and proactive approach to anything usually win the day with the crowds. But I know how to weed out the "fun" smoldering deep within the diamond in the rough. And the woman who has not been tried by many will always catch my eye. But that's just it. You have to be "found out"...whereas your sizzling counterpart is on display from the moment she walks on the scene or exits her vehicle. And guess what, just because she is hot, doesn't mean she is easy, as a lot of gameless wimps will find out that night.

The strong survive sugar...and the sexy. But sexy is where you find it. And some guys only have the "manual"...while ya boy dark has the innate gift!

 

All Im saying is that that kind of attention can be addictive to chicks. Why the heck would they want to settle down with a boyfriend when they can be the star act every weekend?

And if youre a hopeless romantic falling for these acts every weekend, its no wonder you have yet to find a chick that wants to settle down.

 

Those are very valid points. So it would stand to reason that a man looking for "Sleepless in Seattle" should not be searching in "Debbie Does Dallas" neck of the woods right?

Get in where you fit in...strange how a multitude of fish in the water can still lead to famine...unless you know how to navigate the straits...no matter how dire!

 

Haha...I also meant to add that both this type of woman, as well as the conservative ones turn to subjugation...so go figure on that one eh?

Let that be your common denominator...

 

Just feed them some good tasting shots and watch the scales tilt in favor of "fun."

 

Lol i need a list of good tasting shots

 

This for starters:



I brought the clear one to a party once and 3-4 girls that "hate vodka" killed it within the hour.

 

what did you mix it with mike?

 

Here you go playboy:

http://recipes.vangoghvodka.com/new_recipes/

 

You know the quality of men are going downhill when a "how to get nice chicks" thread turns into a receipe list for shots.

 

Nothing. Straight shots.

 

Sugar Momma..

 

That's for the conservative crew!

BTW...which are you Saki? Judging by your posts, I'm guessing conservative?