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I drive Uber and Lyft. Too many stories to tell. I have over 5000 rides between the two. Did it full time for 9 months. Now only do weekend nights. I've put over 100K on the car since I bought it in Oct 2016.
Everyone always asks about puke in the car. I've never had anyone puke in the car but about a half dozen times I've had them puke out the window. Once time it was about 20F outside and the puke froze to the car. It came off in frozen barf chunks when I used the pressure washer. Yum. People usually feel bad and give me a good tip (usually their boyfriend/girlfriend since the one who puked was incapacitated) after which I just go to the carwash and spray it down. So I've never reported anyone.
I've gotten warnings from both Uber and Lyft to watch my speed. It's been the biggest complaint.
I have killer ratings though. Top 10%. 4.96 on Lyft and 4.90 on Uber. I've toned it down a bit but most drivers thank me for picking up the pace. Too many drivers putt along at 5mph under the speed limit which drives most passengers nuts. I get frequent compliments about the car. And plenty of Select rides which the TL qualifies for. That's the upscale service. Pays about 3X the normal rate. It's not the "black" which is the super-posh service. But for that you have to have a full size SUV (Escalade, Suburban or Excursion) with black leather and black paint.
The TL's not a bad Uber vehicle. I average about 26MPH mixed city/highway and get 0.25$ off per gallon of gas with Shell which makes Premium about the same price as Regular. Groups of 4 appreciate the larger back seat. It sucks to fit 3 people in the back of a Nissan Versa. Car's reliable so repairs are rare. And if I had to drive a Prius or Corolla, well, I wouldn't be driving. Half of the reason I drive Uber is to justify driving the car.
Interesting. I'd think a high MPG car would be the best for these kinds of uber/lyft driving jobs...minimize operating cost (ie prius). To me the driving part is very high liability along with using your own car...but glad the service exist to disrupt the traditional taxi company.
I did a lyft a few months back, dude had a fairly recent model MDX. Was pretty chill. Said he had an uncle that was owner or some higher up at an exotic dealer here in honolulu...said he took a Huracan out for a joyride at 3am one time.....I was jelly.
J wants to hear about passengers offering their tips as tip
He wants to hear about some dude pounding another dude's chick, while the dude watches.. specifically
what sort of tip is appropriate for cleaning up cum stains?
A six pack. Or a couple 40's. And it doesn't really stain. Comes right off the leather.
I've had two women invite me into their place. One was older. Probably 50ish and smoked The other was kind of cute but about 40lbs. overweight.
Just a couple months ago I picked up this chick from a club in Park City, probably mid 20's. She was decent looking. Probably a 6.5. Way too much makeup though, and way too skinny. She came across as the most shallow and insecure girl I've met in a long time, talking about how pissed off that her boyfriend dumped her and her friends ditched her at the club, and how her dad was really rich. She wasn't plastered but had obviously had a few cocktails. She asked if I would have sex with her (hypothetical I was assuming). I told her sure, if I weren't married. She was going on about how my wife wouldn't know. We got to her place, which was this huge cabin style house in a gated community. I tried to be modest about the sex thing in a good guy sort of way. I told her I was flattered but would have to pass. Dropped her off and she gave me a 20. Nice girl but I'd be surprised if she hadn't slept with at least 50 guys in the last couple of years. I'm not going to pretend I wouldn't have pulled the trigger on that, assuming I had a condom, which of course I don't carry being married. But hell to the no without protection. Oh, and it's strictly against Uber and Lyft policy so I'd be taking the chance of getting banned if she said anything.
Oh, another time there were two guys and two girls in the car. I got the impression that they weren't couples though. One of the chicks was going on about how she had nice boobs. She specifically said that "they're not too big but I have a good areola to boob ratio. That was pretty funny. Anyway, the guy in the front seat said he had a picture of her boobs and asked if I wanted to see. I'm said sure. He pulled up the pic on his phone and showed me. I just replied "not bad". It wasn't anything spectacular. Probably B cups but yeah, I suppose she has a good "areola to boob ratio". Never really thought of that before
Now it's totally common for chicks to talk about personal stuff. Guys they slept with, sex positions, penis size, masturbation, etc. Nothing's sacred that late at night. When I was new at Uber I was like But I soon learned that many of the girls heading out to the bars and clubs aren't exactly conservative in their conversations or lifestyle. I'm happy to participate if they talk to me about it, which they frequently do. Otherwise I'm a fly on the wall. Guys do it too but it's less interesting since we're all thinking alike. Hearing a girl spill her guts on all that stuff is naturally more entertaining.
Anyway, that's about the extent of my risqué Uber encounters.
This was a great read! if uber or lyft ever get approval to work in Vancouver, I will definitely consider it.
How's the pay though?
The pay during the day isn't worth it, at least not for me here in Salt Lake. When I was unemployed, I kept records of all expenses and earnings when I was driving full time, and calculated about $13 an hour during the day after expenses. Weekend nights are another story. I worked about 18 hours this weekend; about 5pm-2am Friday and Saturday and made $520 in fares and tips through the app. $280.96 for Uber and $239.12 for Lyft. Cash tips were $41. So about $560 total earnings. I spent $84 on gas and around $10 or so on food and snacks. Total profit was about $460-ish. Divide that by 18 hours and you're looking at around $25 an hour.
There's other car expenses to consider though. Namely repairs, tires and depreciation. If you're a DIYer it decreases that overhead considerably on repairs and maintenance. And you get a 20% discount on parts through Advanced Auto/CARQUEST with both Uber and Lyft. With tires, I purchased my last set of Conti DWS06's on eBay for about 60% of the normal price, and they still had 9/32's left on them (new is 10/32's). So if you hustle a bit you can reduce your operating costs. Otherwise it can really rip into your earnings. I don't know how some of these guys driving pickup trucks and Mercedes' make any money after expenses.
The real deal killer is whether you enjoy it or not. If not, it's tedious. There's been times when I've gotten tired of doing it and after that it's just miserable. It's often a pain to find people if they put in their location correctly. You have to deal with drunk people who can't remember where they live or something like that (yes, that has happened to me) and you have to deal with potential damage to your car, which you often don't find until after the fact. I've had my rear air vent broken and front seat leather scratched but I had no idea who did it at the time so I couldn't make a claim. But if you don't mind dealing with that, it's not a bad racket.
Edit: One benefit I neglected to mention though; it's very unlikely that you'll pay any taxes on your earnings. The IRS gives a deduction of $0.54 per mile. While it's possible to exceed the mile/$$$ ratio on that, it's not likely to happen. For example, I earned around $34,000 in the 9 months I was unemployed but put nearly 70K miles on the car. Do the math and that's $0.48 of fares per mile - below the $0.54. So I ended up with no taxes. You do still have to pay social security however. There's no getting out of that. I think that was around $900 or so if I remember correctly.
Last edited by losiglow; Aug 28, 2018 at 11:51 AM.
A six pack. Or a couple 40's. And it doesn't really stain. Comes right off the leather.
I've had two women invite me into their place. One was older. Probably 50ish and smoked The other was kind of cute but about 40lbs. overweight.
Just a couple months ago I picked up this chick from a club in Park City, probably mid 20's. She was decent looking. Probably a 6.5. Way too much makeup though, and way too skinny. She came across as the most shallow and insecure girl I've met in a long time, talking about how pissed off that her boyfriend dumped her and her friends ditched her at the club, and how her dad was really rich. She wasn't plastered but had obviously had a few cocktails. She asked if I would have sex with her (hypothetical I was assuming). I told her sure, if I weren't married. She was going on about how my wife wouldn't know. We got to her place, which was this huge cabin style house in a gated community. I tried to be modest about the sex thing in a good guy sort of way. I told her I was flattered but would have to pass. Dropped her off and she gave me a 20. Nice girl but I'd be surprised if she hadn't slept with at least 50 guys in the last couple of years. I'm not going to pretend I wouldn't have pulled the trigger on that, assuming I had a condom, which of course I don't carry being married. But hell to the no without protection. Oh, and it's strictly against Uber and Lyft policy so I'd be taking the chance of getting banned if she said anything.
Oh, another time there were two guys and two girls in the car. I got the impression that they weren't couples though. One of the chicks was going on about how she had nice boobs. She specifically said that "they're not too big but I have a good areola to boob ratio. That was pretty funny. Anyway, the guy in the front seat said he had a picture of her boobs and asked if I wanted to see. I'm said sure. He pulled up the pic on his phone and showed me. I just replied "not bad". It wasn't anything spectacular. Probably B cups but yeah, I suppose she has a good "areola to boob ratio". Never really thought of that before
Now it's totally common for chicks to talk about personal stuff. Guys they slept with, sex positions, penis size, masturbation, etc. Nothing's sacred that late at night. When I was new at Uber I was like But I soon learned that many of the girls heading out to the bars and clubs aren't exactly conservative in their conversations or lifestyle. I'm happy to participate if they talk to me about it, which they frequently do. Otherwise I'm a fly on the wall. Guys do it too but it's less interesting since we're all thinking alike. Hearing a girl spill her guts on all that stuff is naturally more entertaining.
Anyway, that's about the extent of my risqué Uber encounters.
Was the girl a guy that wanted to have sex with you?
I've driven plenty of guys around who told me they also drive (or drove) for Uber. Some of which have had some crazy stories. Some have seemed a little too off-the-wall to be true but anything can happen late on a Saturday so I wouldn't dismiss anything. The girls are more interesting, but drunk guys recounting their nights events can be pretty fun as well, especially if you're picking them up after about 1-2am from a hotel or some girls apartment.
I had to recall this one since it was a few months back. Hard to forget though. I picked up a guy, probably early 30's, that needed a ride all the way out to a little Podunk town called Plain City. It was around 2am or so IIRC, and it was about a 50 mile drive north of SLC - the opposite direction from where I live I was planning on just one more short ride before I headed home so it was kind of bittersweet knowing I'd get a sweet fare from a long ride, but not get home until 4am. At least it was mostly highway. Anyway, we got to chatting as usual with an hour long ride. He proceeded to tell me probably the craziest threesome story I've ever heard. I would have normally called The only reason I believed him is because he showed me all the texts, which continued through the entire 1 hour ride. I'll try my best to sum it up in less than a novel.
He told me that he'd gone to The Green Pig, a local bar in downtown SLC, to meet up with some friends. When he was there, he saw a girl that he had dated for a while several months ago and they got to chatting. She also had her girlfriend with her from Arizona so the three of them hung out for a while and had some drinks. Yeah, you can see where this is going. He described the girl as a brunette, a little taller if I remember right, with her friend as a more petite blonde. He went on for a while about his dating relationship with the brunette and how she was hot but too "materialistic" and wanted to get serious but he wasn't interested. She wanted to move in with him and all that, at which point he called it off (or maybe she dumped him. Who knows). Either way, I gathered that he was the bachelor-for-life kind of guy. Or at least until he's pushing 40. Anyways, the girls were getting tipsy so he caught an Uber with them back to the Red Lion where the blonde was staying. The three of them went up to the hotel room after which him and the brunette started making out. He didn't go into great detail on the series of events but soon afterward the blond joined in and one thing led to another. Sounded like something out of a porno. He told me he started pinballing them, which I had to ask what that meant. Look it up on urbandictionary if you don't. Then how he did them in all sort of positions that again, you'd expect in some threesome porno. After a while, the brunette fell asleep (passed out drunk?) but the blonde was still game so they started going at it missionary style. Then the drama started. The brunette came to, saw the guy and blonde banging and got all pissed off. The two started fighting, with the blonde as sort of a bystander, then the brunette started going off on the blonde with all three of them yelling at each other for a while. The guy said he didn't have time for this bullshit and said he was taking off. The brunette went even more nuclear, threw some stuff at him, shoes or something, and told him to f*ck off.
That led to the present, with me picking him up and the recital of the story. He continued to receive texts from the brunette during the whole trip, which he orated to me. He was showing me several of them despite me driving on the highway at 75mph, as well as a picture of the two of them at the bar. Pretty hot chicks, that's for sure. At first the texts from the girl were pissy. She was definitely not happy with him going to town on the blonde. Most of his responses consisted of him arguing about why she was ok with a threesome but not just him and the blonde? As well as explaining how it's not like they're together so what right does she have to tell him that he can't bang her friend? After a while, her texts began to be more apologetic and talking about how she wanted to get back together, blah, blah, blah. I think he responded a couple times after that, then just began ignoring the texts. He read them out loud but didn't respond anymore. Toward the end of the ride he must have realized that he probably just screwed up those girls' friendship so he started trying to figure out how to smooth things over so the brunette wouldn't hate her friends guts. Gotta give him props for that I guess. I tried to give him some advice but needless to say, his situation was on a bit of a different level than what I'm accustomed to.
So we got to his place out in BFE, bro fist bump and hooked me up with a good tip. Guy seemed kind of baller. New Range Rover and a really nice house for a single guy. Maybe it was his parents and he was still living with them at 35 I commented on the Rover and he briefly told me about some online business he ran but I can't remember the details. Maybe cocaine or human trafficking? Drove home after that. Good times
Last edited by losiglow; Aug 28, 2018 at 05:41 PM.
I've had plenty of less-lewd situations, some of which have just been awkward or funny. I get plenty of gay guys in the car when driving downtown (let the jokes roll in...).
I've determined that there's two types; the "normal" ones who you can only identify from subtle differences that you'd otherwise not see with two hetero guys just going out to a bar/club/party. Sometimes it's clothing that's just a bit too tight. Other times it's the guys' distance between one another. You tend to leave a decent amount of personal space between your buddies when you're hetero. Not so much if it's your partner.
The other category are the stereotypical flamboyant ones :ghey: who make up the minority, but are still very prevalent. They can obviously be identified by the way they talk but also easy to spot if you see a guy with a button up vest on with no shirt underneath, really tight shorty-shorts or leather pants. I really don't mind these guys since they're usually very polite, generally tip well and their conversations are typically funny as hell.
I picked up a couple of guys fitting the latter description from The Sun Trap, which is a dive gay bar in downtown SLC. Super popular place. There's probably as many straight people as there are gay. Plus everyone else in the LGBTQ (insert additional letters here) community. Always a long line to get in and a ton of Ubers picking up and dropping off. Anyways, the guys get in and right away I can tell that something's wrong. Before I even pull away one of them comments to the other about how he was being a bitch and ruined his night. Their location was the other end of the valley, about a 15 minute ride. I had to enlist all my anti-laugh tactics to avoid breaking out in laughter while listening to these two guys fight. Coughing, thinking of starving kids in Africa, recalling scenes from the Saw movies, etc. The best part was their insults. You fuc*ing candy-ass bitch, asshat, piss-ant, you have more dick in your personality than your pants, your mother should have swallowed you, etc. When I dropped them off, the one who left the car last apologized to me for having to listen to them but truth is it made my night. I actually pulled the memory card out of my dash cam to show my wife. No video in the car but the audio is there. I should have kept a recording.
I've had people argue or fight in the car before. But there was one in particular about a month ago that was a few notches above the normal argument. It was an older couple, late 40's or early 50's I'd guess. The woman was screaming and yelling at the guy. Like, big time. Not like when a kid says their mom yelled at them when all she did was get after them a bit. Like, actual screaming. She was obviously drunk as a skunk but I was still surprised that she'd let loose like that in front of a total stranger in a confined space. The guy would occasionally cut in, refuting whatever she was screaming at him about. Can't remember the subject matter exactly. This wasn't the funny kind of fight like the gay dudes. This was borderline violent and definitely ear-rape. This was one of those rides where I would look at the phone about every 20 seconds to watch the minutes and miles tick away. And where I would speed at least 15mph over the limit to get there quicker. We (finally...) got to the house which apparently was his and not theirs. They both got out and the guy told me to end the ride, which I did but found it kind of weird because you don't normally have to ask the driver to end the ride. Sort of a given . Then the woman was like "how the hell am I going to get home?!?!". Suddenly it made sense why the guy asked me to end the ride. The guy just walked to the front door with the woman still screaming at him all up in his face. The guy opened the door and tried closing the woman out. She tried to fight it open but the guy managed to close it and apparently locked it because she couldn't open it at that point. She slammed on the door for a moment then went over to the windows, still swearing up a storm. I didn't want to leave because I could see this woman was in this position where she had no ride home and it was really late, like 1am-2am or so in the middle of the night I'd guess. After a minute or two of her trying to get his attention she kind of gave up. The part where it got funny is when she came walking back to the car, kind of walking backwards giving him (the house....) the bird on both hands and shouted "F*CK YOU!" as loud as she could. Again, 1am-2am in the middle of the night. In the suburbs. Lots of houses around. And not a half-bad neighborhood. I'm sure she woke a few people up. The part that kind of got me is when she said it again but drew it out like "FUUUUUUUUUUUU*K YOUUUUUUU!!!!" I chuckled a bit at that one. Anyways, she comes back to the car, crying, makeup all running and what not. I offered to give her a ride home but she said she didn't have an Uber account. I asked her how far away it was and she told me it was only a few miles. She got in and I drove her to her apartment.
The other was kind of cute but about 40lbs. overweight. 
But I soon learned that many of the girls heading out to the bars and clubs aren't exactly conservative in their conversations or lifestyle. I'm happy to participate if they talk to me about it, which they frequently do. Otherwise I'm a fly on the wall. Guys do it too but it's less interesting since we're all thinking alike. Hearing a girl spill her guts on all that stuff is naturally more entertaining.
But if you don't mind dealing with that, it's not a bad racket.
I was planning on just one more short ride before I headed home so it was kind of bittersweet knowing I'd get a sweet fare from a long ride, but not get home until 4am. At least it was mostly highway. Anyway, we got to chatting as usual with an hour long ride. He proceeded to tell me probably the craziest threesome story I've ever heard. I would have normally called 
The only reason I believed him is because he showed me all the texts, which continued through the entire 1 hour ride. I'll try my best to sum it up in less than a novel.
. Then the woman was like "how the hell am I going to get home?!?!". Suddenly it made sense why the guy asked me to end the ride. The guy just walked to the front door with the woman still screaming at him all up in his face. The guy opened the door and tried closing the woman out. She tried to fight it open but the guy managed to close it and apparently locked it because she couldn't open it at that point. She slammed on the door for a moment then went over to the windows, still swearing up a storm. I didn't want to leave because I could see this woman was in this position where she had no ride home and it was really late, like 1am-2am or so in the middle of the night I'd guess. After a minute or two of her trying to get his attention she kind of gave up. The part where it got funny is when she came walking back to the car, kind of walking backwards giving him (the house....) the bird on both hands and shouted "F*CK YOU!" as loud as she could. Again, 1am-2am in the middle of the night. In the suburbs. Lots of houses around. And not a half-bad neighborhood. I'm sure she woke a few people up. The part that kind of got me is when she said it again but drew it out like "FUUUUUUUUUUUU*K YOUUUUUUU!!!!" I chuckled a bit at that one. Anyways, she comes back to the car, crying, makeup all running and what not. I offered to give her a ride home but she said she didn't have an Uber account. I asked her how far away it was and she told me it was only a few miles. She got in and I drove her to her apartment.