Family Member Asked to Borrow Money
#82
Senior Moderator
iTrader: (5)
Also, just b/c people appear to be doing well, does not mean that they are. I am not insinuating that this is the case with you, however, appearances can be deceiving. I know a lot of people who look like they're doing well, but they are living check to check and on credit to keep up their lifestyle.
In other words, do not feel uncomfortable about hiding your lifestyle. If people start to question things, just nicely let them know that you have other responsibilities and liabilities which do not allow you to lend money to anyone and you would appreciate it if people would just back off and leave your personal/private matters alone...
As was mentioned a million times, do not let him guilt you. Just simply provide short answers with little to no detail. Stuff like we are not in a position to lend money is sufficient. If you start making other things up, you will lose track of your lies which will make it a bigger mess.
Just keep it simple, and stick to your guns.
In other words, do not feel uncomfortable about hiding your lifestyle. If people start to question things, just nicely let them know that you have other responsibilities and liabilities which do not allow you to lend money to anyone and you would appreciate it if people would just back off and leave your personal/private matters alone...
As was mentioned a million times, do not let him guilt you. Just simply provide short answers with little to no detail. Stuff like we are not in a position to lend money is sufficient. If you start making other things up, you will lose track of your lies which will make it a bigger mess.
Just keep it simple, and stick to your guns.
#85
Fuck that. If the family thinks like that then screw them too. I wouldn't feel guilty one bit about not wanting to lend someone money for whatever reason. Especially a d-bag like the guy the OP is dealing with. It's not my responsibility.
#87
Sweet!
iTrader: (1)
Do not lend any money!!!!!
No means no, which means NO! If he can't accept this, walk away from him.
Family members who expect family to let them borrow (when they mean give) money are no family at all...ESPECIALLY when they haven't done all they can to earn the money (aka, his wife not working!!!!!).
No means no, which means NO! If he can't accept this, walk away from him.
Family members who expect family to let them borrow (when they mean give) money are no family at all...ESPECIALLY when they haven't done all they can to earn the money (aka, his wife not working!!!!!).
Last edited by thunder04; 01-06-2010 at 11:33 AM.
#88
KoolKatz..
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Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Fort Worth, Tx
Age: 47
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Recently, a close family member asked to borrow a significant amount of money from me. I'm open to helping him. However, I have two concerns. One, his wife doesn't work because she believes in homeschooling their son. I'm not against homeschooling. At the same time, I feel that when push comes to shove, which appears to be now for them, she can put him in public school and get a job. Two, he's using the money for a down payment on a loan modification of the mortgage of an investment property. If he doesn't have the funds for a down payment now, how will he ever "catch up" financially and pay me back. In their current situation, it seems unrealistic. I'm afraid that this lender-debtor dynamic will make our relationship awkward.
How can I politely tell him that I'll consider lending him money if we can (1) agree on a binding payment plan and (2) after his wife gets a job?
How can I politely tell him that I'll consider lending him money if we can (1) agree on a binding payment plan and (2) after his wife gets a job?
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Last edited by Etohprn247; 01-14-2010 at 05:52 PM.
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