Recently I was seeing this girl I met at school for a while, cute, pretty very nice and into school a lot....everything seems all good...lunch, dinner, movies and etc (you know the basics). the other night we were talking before I had dropped her off at her place right after dinner...there was something she had to tell me and you all know the truth hurts and stuff, anyways...so she told me about her profession, she didn't tell me the truth at the first place when I met her since day one. she told me that she was a waitress at this one strip club "Servering Drinks" at first... after she told me about her stripping , it pretty much threw me off and I kept in silence for a while she didn't wanna tell me since day one because she said that I would have just wanted to be friends or lack of interest and I guess she liked me when I first met her at school...but I do like her. she wants to take the relationship towards the next level (bf and gf stuff) the only reason why she strips at a gentlemen's club because the money was really substantial for her bills, car, school tuitions and self-providence since she's on her own......the half of me wants to drop her and the other half is telling me to stay....shit man.....I'm in this fucked up dilemma....don't know what to do.....

 

I personally wouldn't, most strippers seem to have baggage....in one form or another (mental and or physical).

 

i would never date a stripper.

by the way, which strip club is it? dont worry im not gonna go.

 

no way

strippers are all nuts

plus they dance naked for other dudes all day

 

bad points: she might be a bit insecure, baggage as mentioned above

good points: pretty much guaranteed

on a more serious note, if you really like her, who cares what she does as a profession, so long as she doesn't go home with the guys, or do side jobs for extra money, dancing isn't all that bad bro.

 

coke and not cola.......

get the point

 

That sucks. I wouldn't.

 

I dunno.............


Wait, yes I do.

 

oh my god... it literally makes me sick to hear things like that. there is NO SUCH THING as stripping out of necessity. period. no one made her take a job like that -- she's doing it because she chose to.

i know SO many kids who are putting themselves through school... they do what they have to do... get student loans, work a normal job, and live within their means. it's VERY possible, because tons of people do it without resorting to taking their clothes off for money. that's an easy way out, and one that shows a serious lack of self respect.

most importantly... if she's been lying to you this much already, is that really how you want to start a relationship?

 

I say just hit it and leave!

 

Just to play devils advocate here....

I don't think that you can make the kind of scratch at a retail or waitstaff job that you could at a strip club. Yes, no one made her take the job. But a no one aspires to be a garbage man either, yet people do that. Why? Becuase they need money. We all do. None of us know how she got started doing this. All we know about this person's life is what was given to us in a few huge run-on sentances.

And let's not bring self respect into the picture here. Just because it's something that you would not do doesn't mean that someone else is doing it because they have no self respect. A good friend of mine did strip for a few years. She made enough $$$ that she opening up a day spa (no they do not give happy endings....perverts). And she made the $$ in just a little over 2 years. No bank loan needed. So please, let's not judge

And you hit the nail in the head in your first statement: "they do what they have to do", which is exactly what she's doing.

Lastly to the original question, it seems like you are already having problems with this new knowledge. That tells me that you shouldn't pursue this any further. If you are having problems with this without being exclusive to each other, one you start to make a committment, your issue with her job is only going to make the relationship suffer.

 

I have to agree with her. and serving does make a good amount of money. maybe not as much as stripping, but enough to live on her own like everyone else has to do. She took the easy way out for money..

I know for sure that my job makes no where NEAR what a stripper does, yet im managing to afford my own place and live on my own and go to school..

but ah well.. if she convinces herself that that is her only option.. then there is no persuading her.

HOWEVER..
I do see why she failed to tell you right away about her job. I mean the words "im a stripper" have a significant first impression on a person and she probably wanted you to get to know her first before you judged her on her stripping.

 

No, I wouldn't.
Although I would consider a Hooters girl, though

 

of course you can't make as much money at most other jobs as you can in stripping... like i said before, that's why you get student loans, drive an older car, live in a smaller apartment, whatever! that's life... like i said before, stripping is an easy way out.

as for "doing what you have to do"... do you understand what i mean by that? this girl isn't doing what she *has* to do, she's doing this because she chose to. sorry but there is no financial situation on earth that would make it absolutely 100% financially necessary to become a stripper.

and in spite of what you're saying, i still think self respect is a huge issue here... maybe not from a typical guy's viewpoint, but from a psychological standpoint... when someone is paying you MONEY to get naked, you're putting a price on yourself. i just really can't see how you can, in essence, SELL yourself and still have any ounce of self-respect left.

 

Ok, so what is the difference between someone paying you to get naked and paying you to serve a meal? Clothes, that's about it. It's entertainment, plain and simple. I guess that any actor or actress that have taken their clothes of for money has no self respect either? Oh, but I guess it's OK when you are getting it's essential to the plot....

And again, you have a pointless arguement. Because someone is paying you to take off your clothes then you have put a price on yourself? Let me ask, how much does your employer pay you, because that number is the price you have put on yourself.....

 

How much do strippers make anyway?? Everyone seems to be talking like she's ballin, but im sure she could make more money using her brain like in an internship or co-op of some sort. Just my 2 cents

 

^depends on the place u work at. i know some places downtown these girls can make a minimum of 500 a night.

 

are you kidding? if you seriously don't see a difference between stripping and waitressing, i honestly have nothing else to say to you.

and as for the actor/actress thing... there are many actors/actresses out there who don't do nude scenes. personally, i wouldn't. i'm not gonna comment on whether or not that's a self-respect issue because that's a completely different topic altogether.

 

I knew this girl at Emory that was paying her own way through school (roughly 35K per semester not counting other expenses) and had an Audi TT fully paid for by stripping. But anyways...yea...she had a unique outlook on life. She "couldn't see herself doing anything else." She loved stripping. She would rather hangout at a strip club than a club or bar. She said on a good night she could walk away with anywhere from $600 to $800. She did admit most girls she worked with had mental problems or were very stupid though.

 

its just shocking that she should've told me the truth in the first place...one complicated situation I've ever been in my whole entire life....I'm supposed to see her tonight...probably going to tell her how I feel and be friends or something...not sure if I want to though....

 

I'm sure you would not sure... somewhere down south of chicago...by Orland Park 708 area code

 

I guess your right about that one.......

 

one of my friends used to be a bouncer at a strip joint before and he told me that strippers averages $500 - $1200 a night on a busy night such as weekends.....anyways thanks for the input guys hopefully I can work something out...if not...I'm just going have to leave her and let it burn......

 

Orland Park? no strip clubs there, probably harvey area somewheres...hrmmm....you need the find out the name

 

i couldn't do it

forget the pyschological baggage she may have, i don't want a girl i 'like' felt up by other dudes (which commonly happens in strip clubs, let's be real) or degraded by drunk college frat guys yelling obscenities - the premise wasn't set

if i had known she was a stripper off the bat, then it would have been different...

 

im in the 708 area code and i dont remember anything by me. and im out in orland almost everyday and i dont think their is one.

just give us the name damnit

 

it's usually a personalty disorder....

 

"Club O" she told me earlier this evening.....anyways...I just got back from dinner with her and I broke it off with her that was my decision and I've thought about it a lot.... and she was very upset...well...er...not upset but disappointed and started crying.....but I've learned a lot from this experience....wish that things were different then perhaps there would be a chance between us....shit now I feel like I've been thrown in a ton of shit why am I feeling like this....hate it when my emotions override me...tend to lose control of how i feel when it burns badly... :'(

 

man, if you did what you feel was right, then that's all that matters, yet it hurts when you hurt someone else's feelings man.

 

well at least both of you told the truth.

 

Dont sweat it man, you did the right thing. The pain and burn you feel right now is nothing compared what youll feel down the road when you see her on stage taking her clothes for for drunken frat dicks yelling obseneties at her. Nobody wants to see or hear the person the love to be disrespected. To continue with this relationship, that is a reality you would have to accept.

 

thanks for the input guys...really helped a lot..even though things didn't seem to work out but all in reality...you can't really have everything in life

 

I wouldn't.

If she is willing to dance naked in front of other guys, I am sure she is willing to do more for money.

you did the right thing, man. Her profession will hunt you for life if you marry her or have relation with her.

 

 

Depending on location, strippers can make anywhere from 600-1000 on a good night. Wayyy more than any internship or co-op can make. Even if you are an mba student doing internship, u make what. 40-50an hour. in a day thats only 400.

 

Find out if she gives lap dances because if she does, you have to drop her. Would you want other dudes feeling on your girl's tits all night?

 

I couldn't make a stripper my girlfriend that I introduce to my folks and think about marrying.

But I could date a stripper for a few months and have some fun with her. And I was a younger guy like 18-23, I'd be all over that shit, 8/10 says that whoever you have as your girlfriend at that age is not the woman you will end up marrying.

I see that you are 25, just a year younger than me so here is what I would do:

Date the stripper, get as many 3somes as possible do all the wild and crazy porno shit I ever wanted to do and let the relationship run it's course. It'll last 6-18 months and you could end up with some of the best sex you'll ever have in your life and a library of stories for your boys.

 

Wuss.

 

that already has happened....but I guess she wants to take the relationship to the next level.... guess I'm just not into that one night stand anymore as I used to...and yes its been about 4 months already since we've been together

 

good point...thats why I've decided to let her go...