Why girls Are Stupid Liars, And why we need more WOMEN in this world...
08-27-2007, 04:24 PM
#1
Pimpin' Ain't Easy!
Thread Starter
Why girls Are Stupid Liars, And why we need more WOMEN in this world...
Females. Lies. Two simple words with powerful meaning. However, as the old proverb regarding women goes - "You can't live with 'em, can't live without 'em." I beg to differ. Women can be fun... especially mature women are good to the eye, soft to the touch, and can cook and clean. If you find such a creature, shoot me an email... I want to meet her. With that being said, I think every man can attest that he has been through his fair share of female drama and BS. It's inevitable that a guy will meet, even date (like me because I was an idiot) a chick who isn't physco, doesn’t have issues (mental or otherwise) and doesn’t resort to crying/fighting like a 5 year old when they don’t get their way.
I am going to explain a little bit what I mean. I will use my most recent ex-girlfriend, who I will only refer to as "Amanda” to respect her privacy, although it is pretty evident that she doesn’t respect me at all. Let go back two years ago in August (05). I was working at a local sub sandwich shop when she came in for her first day. She was very cute and had a great smile. She walked by and the first thing she said to me was "You smell good!" - I should have known to walk away right then and there. Although I smelled good, because I'm cool like that and my cologne was sent from God Himself, the fact that she approached me and said that to me is a testament to our future relationship. You may be wondering why this compliment is such a bad thing, and I don't blame you... guy like getting girls' attention, like me. I love it when chicks pay attention to me. It's a code in our DNA that makes men crave this attention because it makes us feel good about ourselves. Forget the trophies from basketball, ribbons from football and whatever it is you get for doing a good job in soccer... the ONLY thing that can rate, judge, or empower a man to feel his best is the satisfaction that he could catch the attention of a woman (an attractive woman adds more points to the scoreboard). Women who approach men aren't women... they are girls who are desperate for attention, want money, or are just straight up crazy. The unwritten rule that has been in effect since the dawn of time states that men MUST approach the girl... otherwise she isn't worth it.
Let me take you on my journey... we are going to go back in time. As I mentioned earlier, it all started 2 years ago... After we met it didn't take too long for us to hit it off. We started doing what couples do... and it was great. Notes on the car after work, surprises during each others lunch break, hanging out every night, happy-go-lucky walks in the park, blah blah blah... We were great for about 6 months... then she showed me the side of her that I didn't see earlier while we were working together. She started picking fights with me about stupid, little things, just for the heck of it. She secluded me from my friends (which should have been eye opener #2). She got jealous of my guy friends, didn't like me hanging out with them (because they were single, and she was too insecure to resist the urge to believe I was cheating on her and meeting other girls), and criticized them about how they treated me. She me to have her, and only her. She didn't like me drinking, partying, or having any sort of a good time unless it was with her, which at this point, was nearly impossible. Eventually my family started to not like her which made things worse, but I kept truckin'. She came to my birthday and sat at dinner like a bump on a log with her arms crossed, legs crossed, and pursed lips... the very look that made me want to run her over with a steam-roller... I couldn't stand to look at her when she did that. To give an even more accurate description, she was just like the crazy girlfriend (played by Amanda Peet) in the Jason Biggs/Jack Black comedy "Saving Silverman." She always did this when she didn't like something, or when she didn't have my attention... such as when I was visiting with my family or friends (the few left that I had at this point). It didn't stop there; it got worse as we continued our "relationship." Bickering, fighting, bickering, fighting, "you checked her out, blah blah blah", etc (this should have been eye-opener #3).
Then the doozy... I just landed a brand new job. I was 18 years old making $32,600 a year - not a bad salary to have only a couple months out of high school. I was excited, yet nervous. I was at her house the night before my first day at the job for her little brother’s birthday party. I told her I wasn't going to stay long because I wanted to iron my shirt and tie and just get ready for my new job. All hell broke loose. She gave me a guilt trip. She eventually came over to my house after fighting with her mother that she just HAD to see me. She came over, gave me crap for leaving early. I called her a baby... and then it hit me... literally... She slapped me square in the face. It didn't hurt, and I saw it coming, but I was in shock. I called her a baby and this lunatic slaps me? Shoot... I've killed for less! (Ha-ha, just kidding). I really couldn't believe it. Then she comes and wraps me in a big hug and tries to cling on me apologizing and crying. I couldn't get her off until I grabbed her arms and pried her off me and I told her to get out of my house (a little more explicitly, mind you). She told me she was going to go kill herself and she ran out crying... Sheesh... way to relax before my new position. I called her mom and told her just to warn her. I didn't know what to do... I wasn't scared, per-say - but she had a history of cutting (something else I found out later into the relationship). We stopped talking. We were broken up and it sucked, but I got over it. I was hanging out with new friends going out to parties, meeting people and just having a good time. Then she got raped. She went to her friend’s house with a couple of guys, and long story short, she was alone with him and he raped her. I couldn’t believe it. In fact, when she told me, I didn't. And I feel bad about it. She told me she went to the hospital and everything but didn't press charges. I asked what the cops said and she said the cops weren't there - which made me not believe her. Hospitals are required to call the police in any situation that has been violence induced, and a rape kit is collected whether charges are pressed or not... she didn't make mention of this, and so I thought she was messing around and just trying to get me back. To get me back she started going after my "friends." She was calling them up and flirting, hanging out - essentially breaking up our "friendship" because they were taking the bait - she was trying to get to me (indicator #4). It worked. For whatever reason and I don't remember why, she and I got back together. Things were pretty good. I was hiding our relationship because my family hated her and things got stressful. We broke up again (indicator #5). We were no sooner back together again. This time for a while longer than usual. After being there for her (and feeling terrible about not being there for her before) I was there for her when she was crying in her sleep, coaxing her throughout the day, making her feel safe, etc. Basically I was her baby-sitter. She refused to tell her parents, which because they were complete IDIOTS still to this day don't talk about it because they don't want to believe it. There was a point in her depression that I had to chase her around the house trying to get a razor from her because she had been cutting her hips while I wasn't around. To sum up, she cut herself, was depressed, cried, refused to get help, blamed me for everything, started fights about little stuff, led guys who were interested in her on for attention, so then I would have to step in and “regulate" and let the guys know where they stand (indicator #6), and pretty much every other crazy thing you can think of. We broke up again (indicator #7). Got back together again! Sheesh, I was stupid! This was the most recent one... about a month or so ago. Things were ok, but I was stressed from work, and I was getting ready to move into my own apartment, and things just kept building up, and her constant stupidity and nagging got to me. Apparently I didn't "love her enough" or at least, I didn't "show" it. Between her, juggling her little boyfriends on the side trying to get with her and fight me, my job, my business, my family, and my new apartment... I had my hands full. She got a new job after not having one for a couple months at Gander Mountain - YIPPY! She started school the same week so she asked for a couple days as a break... not break-UP, but a break to get her stuff organized.
She told me, and I quote: "Baby, don't worry, I won't be hanging out with guys, looking for guys, holding hands with guys, kissing guys, or doing anything with guys. I just want to get my stuff together." No problem, I had some boxes to unpack in my apartment anyway. No big deal. She had been distant from me, and getting really snotty and mean. I asked her wtf was going on. I'm like "there's someone else, isn't there?" She said yes. I was pissed. It was the guy that she had been hanging out with after her friend introduced her to him a week ago. I had been okay with her hanging out with guys... guys and girls can be friends... can't they? NO (indicator #8). If I were to hang out with girls, all hell would break loose. She had it easy. Because I had a good paying full-time job, my own company, and a good work ethic, there was little time for me to play with anyone but her. She didn't have a job, life, or goals... she would/never will be as successful as me... and I realize that now. She left me for him saying that he shows her love, he loves her, blah blah blah... a week of "love" means more than 2 years, eh? Screw that. She is a lying, cheating, scumbag.
She tried to play it off that she thought she made it clear to me that we were broken up, but I have the text messages to probe that it was just a "break" and things would be good real soon. F*ck that. She is a lying, sneaky, two-faced broad that all guys should be warned of. 2 years of me finally making her feel secure about herself, telling her she’s beautiful, telling her I love her, etc... And she up and leaves after I "fixed" her.
She gives girls a bad name... which is why I don't want a girl. I want a woman. Girls lie. Girls Cheat. Girls are Evil. Girls can be any age. Whether they are 19 or 45... Females that act like this are little girls... and that's why men need to leave them in the dirt where the belong. I hope they last a long time. I hope that they are happy. Because it would be a shame for them to break up in a couple weeks when he goes off to college downtown with a whole group of new girls and ruin the 2 years that we had... I’m not mad - although when I saw her last he acted like a tough guy but couldn't look me in the eye... pansy.
I can't be mad at him too much - he's a guy, and that's what guys do... she permitted it... he didn't make her do anything... so she is who I blame. Because she is an immature, bratty, snotty, going-no-where-in-life girl, I have decided not to be sad anymore. I've already been on a couple dates and am ready to move on. She is a thing of the past, and all I can think of is how Karma will be very, very sweet.
Guys don't date girls. Don't give girls attention. Don't spending money on them and don't even let them in your life. If you need a female companion... for the night, or for a relationship, go with a Woman. A Woman can be any age... 18 - 45... Although I personally only want to stick in the 20-24 range... but that's just me.
The purposes of me writing this is not so that people can make fun of her, or create a malicious attack on her. It's so that I can vent, get this off my chest, and let all the guys out there not to make the same mistake I did. If your girlfriend tries to control you, change who you used to be before you met her (unless it's for the best), or make you feel like crap on a daily basis, get the strength that I didn't have and get rid of her and find someone better. It will be well worth it. I can accept that she moved on and got someone else, but to cheat on me, say it wasn't cheating, and then rub it in my face... not cool.
And for your information, sweetheart (yeah, YOU Amanda, "taking a break" means that you're not broken up, UNLESS YOU TELL THE PERSON THAT YOU BROKE UP WITH THEM). So you can sit there and say you wouldn't cheat on anyone, blah blah blah. YOU CHEATED... not only did you CHEAT on me... but you CHEATED on the one guy who has been there for you through thick and thin (even after the rape).
From cuts on your hips to a slap in the face, you cheated on me. And for that I hope you will always remember me.
“Always and Forever” - ha-ha you remember that crap that you used to write me?
Your ex-boyfriend,
Ryan
I am going to explain a little bit what I mean. I will use my most recent ex-girlfriend, who I will only refer to as "Amanda” to respect her privacy, although it is pretty evident that she doesn’t respect me at all. Let go back two years ago in August (05). I was working at a local sub sandwich shop when she came in for her first day. She was very cute and had a great smile. She walked by and the first thing she said to me was "You smell good!" - I should have known to walk away right then and there. Although I smelled good, because I'm cool like that and my cologne was sent from God Himself, the fact that she approached me and said that to me is a testament to our future relationship. You may be wondering why this compliment is such a bad thing, and I don't blame you... guy like getting girls' attention, like me. I love it when chicks pay attention to me. It's a code in our DNA that makes men crave this attention because it makes us feel good about ourselves. Forget the trophies from basketball, ribbons from football and whatever it is you get for doing a good job in soccer... the ONLY thing that can rate, judge, or empower a man to feel his best is the satisfaction that he could catch the attention of a woman (an attractive woman adds more points to the scoreboard). Women who approach men aren't women... they are girls who are desperate for attention, want money, or are just straight up crazy. The unwritten rule that has been in effect since the dawn of time states that men MUST approach the girl... otherwise she isn't worth it.
Let me take you on my journey... we are going to go back in time. As I mentioned earlier, it all started 2 years ago... After we met it didn't take too long for us to hit it off. We started doing what couples do... and it was great. Notes on the car after work, surprises during each others lunch break, hanging out every night, happy-go-lucky walks in the park, blah blah blah... We were great for about 6 months... then she showed me the side of her that I didn't see earlier while we were working together. She started picking fights with me about stupid, little things, just for the heck of it. She secluded me from my friends (which should have been eye opener #2). She got jealous of my guy friends, didn't like me hanging out with them (because they were single, and she was too insecure to resist the urge to believe I was cheating on her and meeting other girls), and criticized them about how they treated me. She me to have her, and only her. She didn't like me drinking, partying, or having any sort of a good time unless it was with her, which at this point, was nearly impossible. Eventually my family started to not like her which made things worse, but I kept truckin'. She came to my birthday and sat at dinner like a bump on a log with her arms crossed, legs crossed, and pursed lips... the very look that made me want to run her over with a steam-roller... I couldn't stand to look at her when she did that. To give an even more accurate description, she was just like the crazy girlfriend (played by Amanda Peet) in the Jason Biggs/Jack Black comedy "Saving Silverman." She always did this when she didn't like something, or when she didn't have my attention... such as when I was visiting with my family or friends (the few left that I had at this point). It didn't stop there; it got worse as we continued our "relationship." Bickering, fighting, bickering, fighting, "you checked her out, blah blah blah", etc (this should have been eye-opener #3).
Then the doozy... I just landed a brand new job. I was 18 years old making $32,600 a year - not a bad salary to have only a couple months out of high school. I was excited, yet nervous. I was at her house the night before my first day at the job for her little brother’s birthday party. I told her I wasn't going to stay long because I wanted to iron my shirt and tie and just get ready for my new job. All hell broke loose. She gave me a guilt trip. She eventually came over to my house after fighting with her mother that she just HAD to see me. She came over, gave me crap for leaving early. I called her a baby... and then it hit me... literally... She slapped me square in the face. It didn't hurt, and I saw it coming, but I was in shock. I called her a baby and this lunatic slaps me? Shoot... I've killed for less! (Ha-ha, just kidding). I really couldn't believe it. Then she comes and wraps me in a big hug and tries to cling on me apologizing and crying. I couldn't get her off until I grabbed her arms and pried her off me and I told her to get out of my house (a little more explicitly, mind you). She told me she was going to go kill herself and she ran out crying... Sheesh... way to relax before my new position. I called her mom and told her just to warn her. I didn't know what to do... I wasn't scared, per-say - but she had a history of cutting (something else I found out later into the relationship). We stopped talking. We were broken up and it sucked, but I got over it. I was hanging out with new friends going out to parties, meeting people and just having a good time. Then she got raped. She went to her friend’s house with a couple of guys, and long story short, she was alone with him and he raped her. I couldn’t believe it. In fact, when she told me, I didn't. And I feel bad about it. She told me she went to the hospital and everything but didn't press charges. I asked what the cops said and she said the cops weren't there - which made me not believe her. Hospitals are required to call the police in any situation that has been violence induced, and a rape kit is collected whether charges are pressed or not... she didn't make mention of this, and so I thought she was messing around and just trying to get me back. To get me back she started going after my "friends." She was calling them up and flirting, hanging out - essentially breaking up our "friendship" because they were taking the bait - she was trying to get to me (indicator #4). It worked. For whatever reason and I don't remember why, she and I got back together. Things were pretty good. I was hiding our relationship because my family hated her and things got stressful. We broke up again (indicator #5). We were no sooner back together again. This time for a while longer than usual. After being there for her (and feeling terrible about not being there for her before) I was there for her when she was crying in her sleep, coaxing her throughout the day, making her feel safe, etc. Basically I was her baby-sitter. She refused to tell her parents, which because they were complete IDIOTS still to this day don't talk about it because they don't want to believe it. There was a point in her depression that I had to chase her around the house trying to get a razor from her because she had been cutting her hips while I wasn't around. To sum up, she cut herself, was depressed, cried, refused to get help, blamed me for everything, started fights about little stuff, led guys who were interested in her on for attention, so then I would have to step in and “regulate" and let the guys know where they stand (indicator #6), and pretty much every other crazy thing you can think of. We broke up again (indicator #7). Got back together again! Sheesh, I was stupid! This was the most recent one... about a month or so ago. Things were ok, but I was stressed from work, and I was getting ready to move into my own apartment, and things just kept building up, and her constant stupidity and nagging got to me. Apparently I didn't "love her enough" or at least, I didn't "show" it. Between her, juggling her little boyfriends on the side trying to get with her and fight me, my job, my business, my family, and my new apartment... I had my hands full. She got a new job after not having one for a couple months at Gander Mountain - YIPPY! She started school the same week so she asked for a couple days as a break... not break-UP, but a break to get her stuff organized.
She told me, and I quote: "Baby, don't worry, I won't be hanging out with guys, looking for guys, holding hands with guys, kissing guys, or doing anything with guys. I just want to get my stuff together." No problem, I had some boxes to unpack in my apartment anyway. No big deal. She had been distant from me, and getting really snotty and mean. I asked her wtf was going on. I'm like "there's someone else, isn't there?" She said yes. I was pissed. It was the guy that she had been hanging out with after her friend introduced her to him a week ago. I had been okay with her hanging out with guys... guys and girls can be friends... can't they? NO (indicator #8). If I were to hang out with girls, all hell would break loose. She had it easy. Because I had a good paying full-time job, my own company, and a good work ethic, there was little time for me to play with anyone but her. She didn't have a job, life, or goals... she would/never will be as successful as me... and I realize that now. She left me for him saying that he shows her love, he loves her, blah blah blah... a week of "love" means more than 2 years, eh? Screw that. She is a lying, cheating, scumbag.
She tried to play it off that she thought she made it clear to me that we were broken up, but I have the text messages to probe that it was just a "break" and things would be good real soon. F*ck that. She is a lying, sneaky, two-faced broad that all guys should be warned of. 2 years of me finally making her feel secure about herself, telling her she’s beautiful, telling her I love her, etc... And she up and leaves after I "fixed" her.
She gives girls a bad name... which is why I don't want a girl. I want a woman. Girls lie. Girls Cheat. Girls are Evil. Girls can be any age. Whether they are 19 or 45... Females that act like this are little girls... and that's why men need to leave them in the dirt where the belong. I hope they last a long time. I hope that they are happy. Because it would be a shame for them to break up in a couple weeks when he goes off to college downtown with a whole group of new girls and ruin the 2 years that we had... I’m not mad - although when I saw her last he acted like a tough guy but couldn't look me in the eye... pansy.
I can't be mad at him too much - he's a guy, and that's what guys do... she permitted it... he didn't make her do anything... so she is who I blame. Because she is an immature, bratty, snotty, going-no-where-in-life girl, I have decided not to be sad anymore. I've already been on a couple dates and am ready to move on. She is a thing of the past, and all I can think of is how Karma will be very, very sweet.
Guys don't date girls. Don't give girls attention. Don't spending money on them and don't even let them in your life. If you need a female companion... for the night, or for a relationship, go with a Woman. A Woman can be any age... 18 - 45... Although I personally only want to stick in the 20-24 range... but that's just me.
The purposes of me writing this is not so that people can make fun of her, or create a malicious attack on her. It's so that I can vent, get this off my chest, and let all the guys out there not to make the same mistake I did. If your girlfriend tries to control you, change who you used to be before you met her (unless it's for the best), or make you feel like crap on a daily basis, get the strength that I didn't have and get rid of her and find someone better. It will be well worth it. I can accept that she moved on and got someone else, but to cheat on me, say it wasn't cheating, and then rub it in my face... not cool.
And for your information, sweetheart (yeah, YOU Amanda, "taking a break" means that you're not broken up, UNLESS YOU TELL THE PERSON THAT YOU BROKE UP WITH THEM). So you can sit there and say you wouldn't cheat on anyone, blah blah blah. YOU CHEATED... not only did you CHEAT on me... but you CHEATED on the one guy who has been there for you through thick and thin (even after the rape).
From cuts on your hips to a slap in the face, you cheated on me. And for that I hope you will always remember me.
“Always and Forever” - ha-ha you remember that crap that you used to write me?
Your ex-boyfriend,
Ryan
08-27-2007, 05:08 PM
#7
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Well, I read it all and in a nut shell, it describes almost every 18 year old girl I have ever met (minus the rape/cutting). Don't kid yourself myfriend, all females can be/are nuts (of course, most guys I know (myself included), aren't always peaches either).
Eventually, hopefully, you'll find one that you can handle as much as they can handle you.
Eventually, hopefully, you'll find one that you can handle as much as they can handle you.
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08-27-2007, 05:41 PM
#11
Suzuka Master
People in relationships should learn to step back and assess the relationship from a 3rd person's point of view. Is it a healthy relationship, one that brings out the best in both of you? Does your significant other consistently show how important you are to him/her? In line with this, take into consideration the opinion of family members and close friends because they can see things you can't.
I have learned that one should also listen to his instincts. Pay attention to red flags being raised. If your partner treats you like crap even after all the respect and devotion you have showed, she is not worth your time. You deserve someone who won't lie, manipulate, and take advantage of you. I know it hurts to let go of someone you love, but if she doesn't feel the same way about you, have the courage to move on. Yes, you love her... but don't forget to love yourself too!
Hopefully, one day you'll look back and you'll realize that all the pain you went through was worth it because you are happier without her (and perhaps because you'll be with someone way better).
I have learned that one should also listen to his instincts. Pay attention to red flags being raised. If your partner treats you like crap even after all the respect and devotion you have showed, she is not worth your time. You deserve someone who won't lie, manipulate, and take advantage of you. I know it hurts to let go of someone you love, but if she doesn't feel the same way about you, have the courage to move on. Yes, you love her... but don't forget to love yourself too!
Hopefully, one day you'll look back and you'll realize that all the pain you went through was worth it because you are happier without her (and perhaps because you'll be with someone way better).
08-27-2007, 09:18 PM
#12
F1 cart racer
is on this forum..........? because at the end you make it seem like she's lurking on here.....
and agreed girls are girls, but women are hard to come by t this age. thats why i just have fun. there was one girl that was a women but shit went down hill with her. long ass story but she always had her head on her shoulders except when it came to relationships.
have fun, chill with other girls and just have fun, you'll find someone. thats what i always keep in the back of my mind. and like you my schedule is stacked between college and working full time making some very nice money. girls will cling to that in a heart beat so keep them out on a leash but never let them in. what u want is someone who doens't see ur car and is like call me, you want a girl that wants you for you.
relationships are hard but ti's life, get up, learn from it and move on and take what you learned and apply it.
and agreed girls are girls, but women are hard to come by t this age. thats why i just have fun. there was one girl that was a women but shit went down hill with her. long ass story but she always had her head on her shoulders except when it came to relationships.
have fun, chill with other girls and just have fun, you'll find someone. thats what i always keep in the back of my mind. and like you my schedule is stacked between college and working full time making some very nice money. girls will cling to that in a heart beat so keep them out on a leash but never let them in. what u want is someone who doens't see ur car and is like call me, you want a girl that wants you for you.
relationships are hard but ti's life, get up, learn from it and move on and take what you learned and apply it.
08-27-2007, 09:31 PM
#13
Race Director
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well i read it all. You seem very mature and it seems as if you learned a great deal from all of this. It's time to move on, and i know it hurts very much, but it will get easier each day forward. Try to be positive, and just be happy that it happened now instead of later.
08-27-2007, 09:47 PM
#14
trees grow in
Dude, that shit sucks, but look at it this way, if it wasnt for her, you wouldnt have gain the knowledge about treachery girls like her today... At least you are in a better position now that you arent with her. There are other fish in the sea, like, good, sushi-grade fish, unlike "Amanda".
08-27-2007, 10:36 PM
#15
Cold Racketeer
I actually did read all of that original post. So YOU picked someone immature and selfish, and then YOU made the bad choice to put up with it and stay with her for two years... for two years you made these choices and stayed the course.
So now you are qualified to say all women are evil cheats and liars? Perhaps you should look at yourself and decide what was worse- her behavior or your tolerance?
Use this experience to find someone who is kind and dedicated. I did after wasting almost 4 years with someone very much like your ex. Now I've found someone worlds better and I'm completely happy. We have all the love and attraction, but we hang out with my friends, we see my family and her family without problems, everything is as it should be. Of course I never told myself all women were evil and scum and I don't think that is the way to go. Just don't be stupid next time.
So now you are qualified to say all women are evil cheats and liars? Perhaps you should look at yourself and decide what was worse- her behavior or your tolerance?
Use this experience to find someone who is kind and dedicated. I did after wasting almost 4 years with someone very much like your ex. Now I've found someone worlds better and I'm completely happy. We have all the love and attraction, but we hang out with my friends, we see my family and her family without problems, everything is as it should be. Of course I never told myself all women were evil and scum and I don't think that is the way to go. Just don't be stupid next time.
08-28-2007, 03:28 AM
#16
Go Giants
I need either a chart or a MS Paint version....
08-28-2007, 04:12 AM
#17
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I dated the same type of girl for 7 months only thank god...
She had the exact same history as your ex, she cut herself, she was raped, abusive, selfish, she had a lot of baggage.
I took care of her, I kind of felt like her baby sitter/parent. I really cared for the girl. I got her on her feet.
I started to realize the abuse/toxic relationship.
I became distant to her and she realized I was kind of doing my own thing, ie: not spending every single day with her, and working alot more.
Next thing you know she wants a "break" from the relationship. I show up at her house one morning to wish her a happy b-day, and guess whos lying in her bed watching TV? Her Ex. I notice shes wearing some of his clothes. I confront her about her getting back with her ex, she denies it and says they are friends just catching up on old times. She wanted to break up with me right then and there. I was kind of relieved. I feel bad for the ex, hes got to deal with her drama but I guess if hes back with her then he must really care about the girl. I wish both of them the best.
I gave her a hug, told her to take care of herself and never looked back. Best thing that could have ever happened to me. Kind of made me feel used and abused but hey, take it as a learning lesson and move on. I know how you feel, I hate immature selfish girls
She had the exact same history as your ex, she cut herself, she was raped, abusive, selfish, she had a lot of baggage.
I took care of her, I kind of felt like her baby sitter/parent. I really cared for the girl. I got her on her feet.
I started to realize the abuse/toxic relationship.
I became distant to her and she realized I was kind of doing my own thing, ie: not spending every single day with her, and working alot more.
Next thing you know she wants a "break" from the relationship. I show up at her house one morning to wish her a happy b-day, and guess whos lying in her bed watching TV? Her Ex. I notice shes wearing some of his clothes. I confront her about her getting back with her ex, she denies it and says they are friends just catching up on old times. She wanted to break up with me right then and there. I was kind of relieved. I feel bad for the ex, hes got to deal with her drama but I guess if hes back with her then he must really care about the girl. I wish both of them the best.
I gave her a hug, told her to take care of herself and never looked back. Best thing that could have ever happened to me. Kind of made me feel used and abused but hey, take it as a learning lesson and move on. I know how you feel, I hate immature selfish girls
08-28-2007, 08:15 AM
#19
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Originally Posted by tzakiel
Perhaps you should look at yourself and decide what was worse- her behavior or your tolerance?
It's a sucky situation to be in man, but in all honesty, you LET her do 90% of the things you mentioned.
Suicide talk? Cutting? Breaking you way from your bros? That would have lasted less than one day with me. Maybe one full day if she gave incredible head.
Learn from it, know the warning signs, and cut losses when you start noticing it with any other girl from here on out. It's okay to be mad, but it's not okay to group all other women into the same generalization. When I was younger, I dated 18 year olds who were more mature than most 30+ year olds I knew.
08-28-2007, 08:23 AM
#20
Suzuka Master
Originally Posted by speedstream
... I show up at her house one morning to wish her a happy b-day, and guess whos lying in her bed watching TV? Her Ex. I notice shes wearing some of his clothes. I confront her about her getting back with her ex, she denies it and says they are friends just catching up on old times. She wanted to break up with me right then and there.... I gave her a hug, told her to take care of herself and never looked back....
08-28-2007, 09:55 AM
#21
Pimpin' Ain't Easy!
Thread Starter
yeha, my biggest thing is that while i was stupid, there were still some really, really good times... and i thought i loved her... well, if i even know what LOVE is - but what i thought was was, thats how i felt about her....
at any rate i agree with all of you... i was very, very blind and i admit i was stupid and let it happen. thats why i wrote this to help out some of my friends, and i just wnted to vent, so i appreciate you all and your feedback!
as far as generalizing the females, it is stemming from their actions... theres GIRLS and WOMEN... and like i said... a 30 year old could act like a little girl.... this isnt hating on females at all... just the GIRLS... hell, I love women lol - but thats because ive always been about 15 minutes ahead of my time.... ive always been more mature than people my age, because i was forced to. with the job that i have the and responsiblities... having a $460/mo car payment, insurance, bills and $1400 rent (i live lavishly just because i like that style) i know longer think its cool to do some of the stupid shit that my friends do/did.... i do miss doin some of that stuff, but when i look back on it all, i say "Hey, im 19, have a good job, nice car, nice house and I own my own business - well, LLC... life is decent..."
What got to me yesterday is that i blocked her on AIM because i didnt want to be tempted to look at her profile, away messages, etc.... i even deleted her sn, which, to be honest i dont know... because it was a mix of goofy characters... well she got on another one, read my away message saying i was going out to the bar (me and the bouncer are friends) and she texted me tearing me a new one...
she was saying her and her new bf are going to start having sex on the 17th (which is the day I took her virginity 2 years ago) because she wanted to forget about me... and just saying really mean shit. I told her to leave me the fuck alone and shes like "haha i got you to snap! have a good day *muah*" - i couldnt believe it... who does that shit? i was just minding my own business and she does that? it sucks
i have a myspace and her and i have some of the same friends, she never used to have a myspace but she made one just to spite me and has a picture of her and the new guy kissing.... kinda sucks that shes rubbing it in my face like that yesterday
at any rate i agree with all of you... i was very, very blind and i admit i was stupid and let it happen. thats why i wrote this to help out some of my friends, and i just wnted to vent, so i appreciate you all and your feedback!
as far as generalizing the females, it is stemming from their actions... theres GIRLS and WOMEN... and like i said... a 30 year old could act like a little girl.... this isnt hating on females at all... just the GIRLS... hell, I love women lol - but thats because ive always been about 15 minutes ahead of my time.... ive always been more mature than people my age, because i was forced to. with the job that i have the and responsiblities... having a $460/mo car payment, insurance, bills and $1400 rent (i live lavishly just because i like that style) i know longer think its cool to do some of the stupid shit that my friends do/did.... i do miss doin some of that stuff, but when i look back on it all, i say "Hey, im 19, have a good job, nice car, nice house and I own my own business - well, LLC... life is decent..."
What got to me yesterday is that i blocked her on AIM because i didnt want to be tempted to look at her profile, away messages, etc.... i even deleted her sn, which, to be honest i dont know... because it was a mix of goofy characters... well she got on another one, read my away message saying i was going out to the bar (me and the bouncer are friends) and she texted me tearing me a new one...
she was saying her and her new bf are going to start having sex on the 17th (which is the day I took her virginity 2 years ago) because she wanted to forget about me... and just saying really mean shit. I told her to leave me the fuck alone and shes like "haha i got you to snap! have a good day *muah*" - i couldnt believe it... who does that shit? i was just minding my own business and she does that? it sucks
i have a myspace and her and i have some of the same friends, she never used to have a myspace but she made one just to spite me and has a picture of her and the new guy kissing.... kinda sucks that shes rubbing it in my face like that yesterday
08-28-2007, 01:29 PM
#22
Suzuka Master
Wow, she even told you when she plans to have start having sex with her new bf?! 
You are definitely better off without her. Erase all her contact info and just block her from your MySpace.
You are definitely better off without her. Erase all her contact info and just block her from your MySpace.
08-28-2007, 02:02 PM
#23
Make a hole, coming thru!
holy #*@&
Originally Posted by fant0m_TL
... So you can sit there and say you wouldn't cheat on anyone, blah blah blah. YOU CHEATED... not only did you CHEAT on me... but you CHEATED on the one guy who has been there for you through thick and thin (even after the rape).
From cuts on your hips to a slap in the face, you cheated on me. And for that I hope you will always remember me.
08-28-2007, 02:15 PM
#24
Make a hole, coming thru!
After reading the Cliff Notes for this thread, i suspect this poor girl is a survivor of other, earlier abuse. No crystal ball gazing, but I recognize some of the symptoms (I spent several weeks dating an abuse survivor this year, nothing as heart-rending as your story, but a thrill a minute all the same). Self-injuring and promiscuous behavior.... A date rape (or plain ol' coerced rape) just multiplies the problems. Believe me, if you aren't prepared to be 200% supportive of someone like this, in therapy, then you're better off on the sidelines. No, pardon, in the bleachers.
08-28-2007, 03:01 PM
#25
Pimpin' Ain't Easy!
Thread Starter
Originally Posted by davidspalding
After reading the Cliff Notes for this thread, i suspect this poor girl is a survivor of other, earlier abuse. No crystal ball gazing, but I recognize some of the symptoms (I spent several weeks dating an abuse survivor this year, nothing as heart-rending as your story, but a thrill a minute all the same). Self-injuring and promiscuous behavior.... A date rape (or plain ol' coerced rape) just multiplies the problems. Believe me, if you aren't prepared to be 200% supportive of someone like this, in therapy, then you're better off on the sidelines. No, pardon, in the bleachers.
08-28-2007, 03:21 PM
#26
Team Owner
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It sounds like you may be better off, but a bit bitter. Get over it. Move on. Chalk it up to a life experience.
As for this....I assume you were never raped, so knowing what she is going through is out of the question. Counseling cannot be forced on someone. If she goes it will have to be on her terms. Volenturing to pay, or making appointments for her was just adding pressure.
Originally Posted by fant0m_TL
trust me man... i was there for her... making appointments for counselors that she cancellled.. .i even brought her to the police station to press charges because she was scared but she backed out of it all... she refused the help. i even wanted to pay for the counseling... she just didnt do it....
08-28-2007, 03:27 PM
#27
Pimpin' Ain't Easy!
Thread Starter
Originally Posted by RaviNJCLs
It sounds like you may be better off, but a bit bitter. Get over it. Move on. Chalk it up to a life experience.
As for this....I assume you were never raped, so knowing what she is going through is out of the question. Counseling cannot be forced on someone. If she goes it will have to be on her terms. Volenturing to pay, or making appointments for her was just adding pressure.
As for this....I assume you were never raped, so knowing what she is going through is out of the question. Counseling cannot be forced on someone. If she goes it will have to be on her terms. Volenturing to pay, or making appointments for her was just adding pressure.
hindsight is 20/20 and iwish i did some things differntly.... but when you are 18 caring for a rape victim with no one to turn to, you only do what your gut and heart tell you to do... i loved her, i would have flown her out tosee the best rape counselor possible. money wasnt an option and i made it clear with her that i would do anything in my power to help her through this.... apparently she is well enough now to treat me this way....
08-28-2007, 03:27 PM
#28
99 TL, 06 E350
man i got lost 1/3 way through. Yeh girls are liars. I know this girl who is a best freind...she must have everything her way....worst part is that the BF does everything he is told. He's got no back bone.
08-28-2007, 03:33 PM
#29
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Originally Posted by fant0m_TL
well then i dont know what else to do. do you know how many times i laid there holding her while she was crying in her sleep... it was hard on me too, and not having anyone else to go to was just as hard for me as it was for her. like i said, her parents werent doing shit about it... the only thing i knew how to do was hold her kiss her forhead and just let her know she was safe... youre right, therapy cant be forced on anyone but at least i tried... at least i gave her options... i wanted her to get help but i wanted her to want to get help as well.... i cant make her WANT to, but i can certainly try to make things easier...
hindsight is 20/20 and iwish i did some things differntly.... but when you are 18 caring for a rape victim with no one to turn to, you only do what your gut and heart tell you to do... i loved her, i would have flown her out tosee the best rape counselor possible. money wasnt an option and i made it clear with her that i would do anything in my power to help her through this.... apparently she is well enough now to treat me this way....
hindsight is 20/20 and iwish i did some things differntly.... but when you are 18 caring for a rape victim with no one to turn to, you only do what your gut and heart tell you to do... i loved her, i would have flown her out tosee the best rape counselor possible. money wasnt an option and i made it clear with her that i would do anything in my power to help her through this.... apparently she is well enough now to treat me this way....
It sounds weird, but can you imagine that the memories of the time she spent with you was spent crying about a rape. Although you didn't do anything wrong, you just remind her of what happened.
I admire the fact that you DIDN'T just ditch her. And you shouldn't regret spending that time with her. You can be upset about where things stand now, but I really think you will grow from this.
08-28-2007, 03:40 PM
#30
Pimpin' Ain't Easy!
Thread Starter
yeah i do to... but her rubbing this in out of spite just to make me feel like crap is really unnecessary... i treated her like a princess... i think when she stopped being insecure about herself thats when she decided to do it... idk... im just trying to move on, but if more shit happens i think im going to get a restraining order... i just want to move on with my life.
idk... im just trying to move on, but if more shit happens i think im going to get a restraining order... i just want to move on with my life.
08-28-2007, 03:42 PM
#31
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Originally Posted by fant0m_TL
yeah i do to... but her rubbing this in out of spite just to make me feel like crap is really unnecessary... i treated her like a princess... i think when she stopped being insecure about herself thats when she decided to do it... idk... im just trying to move on, but if more shit happens i think im going to get a restraining order... i just want to move on with my life.
idk... im just trying to move on, but if more shit happens i think im going to get a restraining order... i just want to move on with my life.And if that fails...call up her best girfriend and nail her.
08-28-2007, 03:52 PM
#32
Pimpin' Ain't Easy!
Thread Starter
Originally Posted by RaviNJCLs
It gets better. Keep busy.
And if that fails...call up her best girfriend and nail her.
And if that fails...call up her best girfriend and nail her.
08-29-2007, 10:11 PM
#33
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Originally Posted by fant0m_TL
The purposes of me writing this is not so that people can make fun of her, or create a malicious attack on her. It's so that I can vent, get this off my chest, and let all the guys out there not to make the same mistake I did. If your girlfriend tries to control you, change who you used to be before you met her (unless it's for the best), or make you feel like crap on a daily basis, get the strength that I didn't have and get rid of her and find someone better. It will be well worth it. I can accept that she moved on and got someone else, but to cheat on me, say it wasn't cheating, and then rub it in my face... not cool.
Originally Posted by sasha
People in relationships should learn to step back and assess the relationship from a 3rd person's point of view. Is it a healthy relationship, one that brings out the best in both of you? Does your significant other consistently show how important you are to him/her? In line with this, take into consideration the opinion of family members and close friends because they can see things you can't.
I have learned that one should also listen to his instincts. Pay attention to red flags being raised. If your partner treats you like crap even after all the respect and devotion you have showed, she is not worth your time. You deserve someone who won't lie, manipulate, and take advantage of you. I know it hurts to let go of someone you love, but if she doesn't feel the same way about you, have the courage to move on. Yes, you love her... but don't forget to love yourself too!
Hopefully, one day you'll look back and you'll realize that all the pain you went through was worth it because you are happier without her (and perhaps because you'll be with someone way better).
I have learned that one should also listen to his instincts. Pay attention to red flags being raised. If your partner treats you like crap even after all the respect and devotion you have showed, she is not worth your time. You deserve someone who won't lie, manipulate, and take advantage of you. I know it hurts to let go of someone you love, but if she doesn't feel the same way about you, have the courage to move on. Yes, you love her... but don't forget to love yourself too!
Hopefully, one day you'll look back and you'll realize that all the pain you went through was worth it because you are happier without her (and perhaps because you'll be with someone way better).
08-31-2007, 10:10 AM
#34
Make a hole, coming thru!
Originally Posted by fant0m_TL
trust me man... i was there for her... making appointments for counselors that she cancellled.. .i even brought her to the police station to press charges because she was scared but she backed out of it all... she refused the help. i even wanted to pay for the counseling... she just didnt do it....
