What's the worst place you ever got wood?
#43
Go Giants
Originally Posted by 05TLTony
Man, you guys are freakin funny! I never knew of this section of the forum until today. I've gotta visit more often.
#46
Suzuka Master
Originally Posted by 05TLTony
No way man! This is some good shit! I fit in perfectely.
Let's also hope you're thick-skinned.
#47
dancing with gramdma at my father's second wedding. my step mother's daughter was hot and also on the dance floor. I was holding grandma but looking at my new "sister". kinda awkward, but grandma did invite me over more often for cookies after that. hmmm.....
#48
Senior Moderator
iTrader: (5)
Originally Posted by PillsburyChoboy
I was in a limo that was driving my GF and her family to a funeral for her great grandmother (they weren't very close). Everyone was packed in tightly so my GF was sitting on me lap. Understand that the atmosphere is quite glum and somber.
And right on cue, my shorty feels the "pressure" from her slighly bouncing ass/motion of the car and begins it's Jekyll-Hyde transformation. I can literally feel it stretching and yawning like "OK, here we go! Let's get it started!"
Of course, my GF looks at me with an expression best described as priceless ... a combination of "WTF?!?" and "Mmm ... nice" and "You gotta to be kidding me!" She leans over and whispers, "Stop. Stop. Stop" And I whisper back, "I can't ... he's blind down there. He doesn't know what's going on." She kinda giggles and we both get a nasty look from pretty much everyone in the limo.
And right on cue, my shorty feels the "pressure" from her slighly bouncing ass/motion of the car and begins it's Jekyll-Hyde transformation. I can literally feel it stretching and yawning like "OK, here we go! Let's get it started!"
Of course, my GF looks at me with an expression best described as priceless ... a combination of "WTF?!?" and "Mmm ... nice" and "You gotta to be kidding me!" She leans over and whispers, "Stop. Stop. Stop" And I whisper back, "I can't ... he's blind down there. He doesn't know what's going on." She kinda giggles and we both get a nasty look from pretty much everyone in the limo.
#50
Dr. Feelgood
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Originally Posted by Minch00
At a strip club. I mean, I know it's a strip club, but that shit is still awkward.
#53
I shoot people
on the eliptical, doing cardio at the gym... and I was wearing sweats!
#54
Suzuka Master
Originally Posted by teg_to_bike
There was this one time I walked into the local preschool..........
#56
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Originally Posted by Minch00
At a strip club. I mean, I know it's a strip club, but that shit is still awkward.
Weak.....
That shit happens to everyone...we wanna hear something funny....embarassing....
Like when you got a stiff for Geisha and you were jerking it to her online....and then your mom walked in on you....
#57
Drifting
Originally Posted by moomaster_99
Weak.....
That shit happens to everyone...we wanna hear something funny....embarassing....
Like when you got a stiff for Geisha and you were jerking it to her online....and then your mom walked in on you....
That shit happens to everyone...we wanna hear something funny....embarassing....
Like when you got a stiff for Geisha and you were jerking it to her online....and then your mom walked in on you....
#58
Pit Stop?
Originally Posted by moomaster_99
Weak.....
That shit happens to everyone...we wanna hear something funny....embarassing....
Like when you got a stiff for Geisha and you were jerking it to her online....and then your mom walked in on you....
That shit happens to everyone...we wanna hear something funny....embarassing....
Like when you got a stiff for Geisha and you were jerking it to her online....and then your mom walked in on you....
I'm really sorry you have fantasies about me masturbating. Seriously.
#59
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Originally Posted by Minch00
I'm really sorry you have fantasies about me masturbating. Seriously.
I'm sorry...you're just so hot and manly....you make me :theghey:
Yeah right....not even youngtl would sleep with you.
#62
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Originally Posted by Minch00
Your mom.
That's cool...whatever, my mom's dead.....is that the only way for you to sleep with someone?? When they're dead??? Damn Necro....
#67
Registered Abuser of VTEC
Originally Posted by moomaster_99
I'm sorry...you're just so hot and manly....you make me :theghey:
Yeah right....not even youngtl would sleep with you.
Yeah right....not even youngtl would sleep with you.
You need to learn, moomaster, that young gay guys are NOT desperate for sex if we're decent looking. It's a joke to hook up if required. That's why the ugly ones get left out and never have sex.
And back on topic, I got wood at the gym today as I was on my way out the door and my old friend from high school rubbed up against me as he was going out the door. He plays for the University of Alberta football team
#68
Pit Stop?
Originally Posted by youngTL
You are correct. I have MUCH higher standards and only sleep with hot guys (who also have to date me first, but I might make exceptions for exceptionally hot guys). Someone that fugly doesn't even get a first look from me. I'm glad he's not on my team.
That's the most soul crushing thing I've ever heard.
#69
Moderator
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i pop random wood all the time, im just lucky enough that ive never been in a situation that'll cause me to be embarassed.
#73
Go Giants
Originally Posted by Minch00
And you're the most bandwagoneer mother fucker I've ever seen.
#76
Pit Stop?
Originally Posted by btsilver
You're a still a virgin. Pay off that purse debt yet?
I fail to see how being a virgin is a bad thing, but whatever. Yay, it doesn't burn when I pee and I don't have any kids. It's not like a chick has never touched my dick, head is a wonderful thing. She was drunk and it was sloppy but hey.
And yeah, my debt is paid off. Anymore questions?
#77
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Originally Posted by Minch00
I fail to see how being a virgin is a bad thing, but whatever. Yay, it doesn't burn when I pee and I don't have any kids. It's not like a chick has never touched my dick, head is a wonderful thing. She was drunk and it was sloppy but hey.
And yeah, my debt is paid off. Anymore questions?
And yeah, my debt is paid off. Anymore questions?
#78
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Originally Posted by Minch00
I fail to see how being a virgin is a bad thing, but whatever. Yay, it doesn't burn when I pee and I don't have any kids. It's not like a chick has never touched my dick, head is a wonderful thing. She was drunk and it was sloppy but hey.
And yeah, my debt is paid off. Anymore questions?
And yeah, my debt is paid off. Anymore questions?
1) Getting head from a drunk chick....and thinking it will merit points.
2) Buying a purse for a pumpkin head girl, in hopes of getting some.
3) Buying a $1200 purse.
4) Getting turned down by a hooker.
5) Working at Disney World and still not being able to hook up with chicks.
6) Whining about being a virgin.
7) Then not doing anything to make self 'more attractive' to the opposite sex.
Need I say anymore?
#79
Pit Stop?
Originally Posted by moomaster_99
Being a virgin isn't a bad thing...but let me tell you what is a bad thing.
1) Getting head from a drunk chick....and thinking it will merit points.
2) Buying a purse for a pumpkin head girl, in hopes of getting some.
3) Buying a $1200 purse.
4) Getting turned down by a hooker.
5) Working at Disney World and still not being able to hook up with chicks.
6) Whining about being a virgin.
7) Then not doing anything to make self 'more attractive' to the opposite sex.
Need I say anymore?
1) Getting head from a drunk chick....and thinking it will merit points.
2) Buying a purse for a pumpkin head girl, in hopes of getting some.
3) Buying a $1200 purse.
4) Getting turned down by a hooker.
5) Working at Disney World and still not being able to hook up with chicks.
6) Whining about being a virgin.
7) Then not doing anything to make self 'more attractive' to the opposite sex.
Need I say anymore?
I'm sorry, but head is head. I never even tried to get a hooker, much less got turned down by one. Working at Disney with a bunch of old guys and disgusting chicks is not where I'm looking to get laid. I'm not whining about shit, YOU PEOPLE KEEP FUCKING BRINGING IT UP, and I DO work out.
So yeah, say something else.