Ok, here's the deal guys... see if you can help me out.

There's this girl that I met this past summer and we got pretty close. She's gorgeous, great body, beautiful personality, just an all around great girl, but she goes to school half way across the country and I'm stuck here for school. She's one of a kind and I hated having to see her go, and because I knew she was only in town for the summer I didn't let myself get too close for fear of a terrible heart break come August. I wish I could have allowed myself to open up to her more, but I was basically protecting myself. I've done the long distance relathionship thing before and it worked for awhile, but it's just so hard. And now I'm not sure what to do about this girl. I think about her all the time and am contemplating taking a road trip one weekend to go visit her. Is this a good idea? We're not in a relationship at all right now, and I rarely talk to her lately, but we both miss each other's company. Is a visit a bad thing, or would it help to see where we stand and what could come of our relationship?

Any advice is greatly appreciated. Thanks for your help guys.

 

If you're willing to accept the hardships long distance can bring, take the relationship to another level and make it work for you.

Love is always hard, but in the end, it's always worth it.

 

well it sounds like you don't talk much, so I would definately try to make sure you are both on the same page before proceeding. simply because she misses you doesn't mean she wants a long distance relationship. i would definately try to build some kind of relationship first, at least talk, before you get your emotions into it and spend your time/money etc.

 

I would go and visit, just to see if you still have the attraction and chemistry you initially felt. I think you have a responsibility to yourself to see if that's the case.

 

The love chat room is open again.

 

It is possible to maintain a long-distance relationship if that is what both of you want to do, but you do need to watch for the idealization of both the other person and the relationship that can occur without regular contact. If it does turn real, the two of you will need to figure out how to keep some form of contact on a regular basis - phone, airtravel, email......... to avoid placing her on a pedastel and falling in love with the image of her, rather than the real person (and vice-versa).

A relationship I had that was sort of maybe real when I lived in Philly turned very real when I moved out of town and we discovered how much we valued each other. Spent a fortune on travel, saw each other about every six weeks, wrote tons and used her firm's 800 number a lot (this was pre-email - shocking, but there was that time.....) We lived in different cities for over four years while she settled out of a nasty marriage; I returned to the East Coast (mostly to avoid geography becoming an issue in a very nasty child custody situation) and we got married. Took a lot of work to sustain a real relationship, but was worth it; married 18 years now. But I wish that I had had stock in Continental Airlines.................

It's worth spending some time with this woman to figure out whether there is the stuff to build a relationship on, then the two of you have to agree that you want to let it develop, then figure out how to make it happen............ If it is "the real thing", it will be worth it, if it is not, it will still have been an interesting experience in exploring who you are .........