The Stat's Win Again
אני עומד עם ישראל
Joined: Oct 2006
Posts: 9,860
Likes: 810
From: Los Gatos, CA
What happens sucks. She was on the rebound and it happened. Not much else you can say, Brett got her in a vulnerable moment. You knew as well as I did something would happen and dude had the angle. There a lot of other things to worry about at 18 my man. You got plenty more time for heartache.
Push through it. It'll be alright. Don't feel bad for anything just don't make her feel like shit in the process. You can feel good, that'll help you with the healing process.
Push through it. It'll be alright. Don't feel bad for anything just don't make her feel like shit in the process. You can feel good, that'll help you with the healing process.
~Da Nocturnal Cheetah~
Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 6,798
Likes: 4
From: Germantown, MD
Hindsight is 20/20.
Just be happy that you are no longer with her. But don't feel stupid or ashamed about any of it. He got what he deserved, and she deserved the boot. These are valuable lessons for you in helping you understand the expected actions and reactions in certain situations. Also what possibilities to be aware of out of the next girl your age you encounter. Do not read that I just said she will cheat on you. I didn't. What I mean is, that because she is in the learning stages of her own social and sexual awareness, she may make mistakes or should reasonably be expected to be immature. The whole making a girl who cheated on you your friend afterwards is stupid to me and contradicts the word "friend" itself.
What you have to learn how to do is reign in and hone your emotions with women. Not telling you to "not" feel anything, but to grow with your relationship and allow your feelings to progress accordingly. A year and a half breakup and being in a frenzied state is not good. But you are 18, so immature ebullition is to be expected. I'm just saying you have to gain control of those emotions.
One big caveat: Do not resort to drinking when "all seems lost". What can seem like a simple way to relieve yourself of the day's angst, can turn into alcoholism rather quickly. Especially with someone as young as you. I have seen this happen to promising, young adults. Don't go that route. Talk about it, deal with it like a young man. Cry some even. But get back on that horse and ride!
Chalk this up as a part of the learning curve and get back out there...you have more lessons to learn...
Peace2fingaz!
Just be happy that you are no longer with her. But don't feel stupid or ashamed about any of it. He got what he deserved, and she deserved the boot. These are valuable lessons for you in helping you understand the expected actions and reactions in certain situations. Also what possibilities to be aware of out of the next girl your age you encounter. Do not read that I just said she will cheat on you. I didn't. What I mean is, that because she is in the learning stages of her own social and sexual awareness, she may make mistakes or should reasonably be expected to be immature. The whole making a girl who cheated on you your friend afterwards is stupid to me and contradicts the word "friend" itself.
What you have to learn how to do is reign in and hone your emotions with women. Not telling you to "not" feel anything, but to grow with your relationship and allow your feelings to progress accordingly. A year and a half breakup and being in a frenzied state is not good. But you are 18, so immature ebullition is to be expected. I'm just saying you have to gain control of those emotions.
One big caveat: Do not resort to drinking when "all seems lost". What can seem like a simple way to relieve yourself of the day's angst, can turn into alcoholism rather quickly. Especially with someone as young as you. I have seen this happen to promising, young adults. Don't go that route. Talk about it, deal with it like a young man. Cry some even. But get back on that horse and ride!
Chalk this up as a part of the learning curve and get back out there...you have more lessons to learn...
Peace2fingaz!
Stupid women.
UPDATE:
So we(I... she wanted to get back together) decided to stay friends because of all the problems that I was able to just forget about after it was all said and done. So she was hanging out with this one guy a few days before we broke up, it was a big deal to me we fought about it and I think thats what ended it. One of my arguments about this guy is that she just met him and had no idea of his intentions and she of course argued that he was a good guy.
About a week after we broke up (and this hurt) she slept with him (btw him is Brett for the sake of the story). I sucked it up and drank back the beer. So now about another week after that incedent we are talking about her crazy night and she tells me that she got a random call from this girl named christine. Christine explains to the ex that she is Brett's current gf. ~pause~ when I heard this the big I TOLD YOU SO alarm went off... it felt good ~continue~ and that they are living together and have a kid ~there it goes again~ and she wants to know what happened and if she fucked him in her bed (she was honest and said yes) so I feel bad for feeling so good about the situation but w.e.
Any thoughts???
So we(I... she wanted to get back together) decided to stay friends because of all the problems that I was able to just forget about after it was all said and done. So she was hanging out with this one guy a few days before we broke up, it was a big deal to me we fought about it and I think thats what ended it. One of my arguments about this guy is that she just met him and had no idea of his intentions and she of course argued that he was a good guy.
About a week after we broke up (and this hurt) she slept with him (btw him is Brett for the sake of the story). I sucked it up and drank back the beer. So now about another week after that incedent we are talking about her crazy night and she tells me that she got a random call from this girl named christine. Christine explains to the ex that she is Brett's current gf. ~pause~ when I heard this the big I TOLD YOU SO alarm went off... it felt good ~continue~ and that they are living together and have a kid ~there it goes again~ and she wants to know what happened and if she fucked him in her bed (she was honest and said yes) so I feel bad for feeling so good about the situation but w.e.
Any thoughts???
What Would Don Draper Do?
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 22,223
Likes: 1
From: Houston
UPDATE:
So we(I... she wanted to get back together) decided to stay friends because of all the problems that I was able to just forget about after it was all said and done. So she was hanging out with this one guy a few days before we broke up, it was a big deal to me we fought about it and I think thats what ended it. One of my arguments about this guy is that she just met him and had no idea of his intentions and she of course argued that he was a good guy.
About a week after we broke up (and this hurt) she slept with him (btw him is Brett for the sake of the story). I sucked it up and drank back the beer. So now about another week after that incedent we are talking about her crazy night and she tells me that she got a random call from this girl named christine. Christine explains to the ex that she is Brett's current gf. ~pause~ when I heard this the big I TOLD YOU SO alarm went off... it felt good ~continue~ and that they are living together and have a kid ~there it goes again~ and she wants to know what happened and if she fucked him in her bed (she was honest and said yes) so I feel bad for feeling so good about the situation but w.e.
Any thoughts???
So we(I... she wanted to get back together) decided to stay friends because of all the problems that I was able to just forget about after it was all said and done. So she was hanging out with this one guy a few days before we broke up, it was a big deal to me we fought about it and I think thats what ended it. One of my arguments about this guy is that she just met him and had no idea of his intentions and she of course argued that he was a good guy.
About a week after we broke up (and this hurt) she slept with him (btw him is Brett for the sake of the story). I sucked it up and drank back the beer. So now about another week after that incedent we are talking about her crazy night and she tells me that she got a random call from this girl named christine. Christine explains to the ex that she is Brett's current gf. ~pause~ when I heard this the big I TOLD YOU SO alarm went off... it felt good ~continue~ and that they are living together and have a kid ~there it goes again~ and she wants to know what happened and if she fucked him in her bed (she was honest and said yes) so I feel bad for feeling so good about the situation but w.e.
Any thoughts???
for resisting any urge you might have had to get back with her.2. i hate how girls do this. "he's a good guy. he's harmless. he's not a threat." and BAM. literally.
3. is your ex still hanging out with brett?
4. i think it's ok that you're still friends with her. but personally, i dunno how good of a friend i could be with her if she slept with another guy after just one week.
good luck.
The hair says it all
Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 7,566
Likes: 0
From: Manhattan, NYC
UPDATE:
So we(I... she wanted to get back together) decided to stay friends because of all the problems that I was able to just forget about after it was all said and done. So she was hanging out with this one guy a few days before we broke up, it was a big deal to me we fought about it and I think thats what ended it. One of my arguments about this guy is that she just met him and had no idea of his intentions and she of course argued that he was a good guy.
About a week after we broke up (and this hurt) she slept with him (btw him is Brett for the sake of the story). I sucked it up and drank back the beer. So now about another week after that incedent we are talking about her crazy night and she tells me that she got a random call from this girl named christine. Christine explains to the ex that she is Brett's current gf. ~pause~ when I heard this the big I TOLD YOU SO alarm went off... it felt good ~continue~ and that they are living together and have a kid ~there it goes again~ and she wants to know what happened and if she fucked him in her bed (she was honest and said yes) so I feel bad for feeling so good about the situation but w.e.
Any thoughts???
So we(I... she wanted to get back together) decided to stay friends because of all the problems that I was able to just forget about after it was all said and done. So she was hanging out with this one guy a few days before we broke up, it was a big deal to me we fought about it and I think thats what ended it. One of my arguments about this guy is that she just met him and had no idea of his intentions and she of course argued that he was a good guy.
About a week after we broke up (and this hurt) she slept with him (btw him is Brett for the sake of the story). I sucked it up and drank back the beer. So now about another week after that incedent we are talking about her crazy night and she tells me that she got a random call from this girl named christine. Christine explains to the ex that she is Brett's current gf. ~pause~ when I heard this the big I TOLD YOU SO alarm went off... it felt good ~continue~ and that they are living together and have a kid ~there it goes again~ and she wants to know what happened and if she fucked him in her bed (she was honest and said yes) so I feel bad for feeling so good about the situation but w.e.
Any thoughts???
stop talking to that bitch
Oh Hullow
Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 1,990
Likes: 14
From: Freehold, NJ
tell brett that you have herpes and to get tested for sleeping with your ex... that will add a little excitement to this situation. haha
but rly the friends thing would be a big no no for me... how can you have any respect for someone who would do that to you? IMO the hanging out with the guy while you were dating is cheating.
let me rephrase...i dont rly believe in girls or guys in committed relationships hanging out with people of the opposite sex 1 on 1 just doesnt seem appropriate to me idk
... but ESPECIALLY if she met this guy after the fact the 2 of you were dating... you have to wonder what her intentions really are there.
bored? curious? sounds sneaky, and deceiving to me. you made the right choice, however i just dont know how you would be able to look at this girl as your friend.
also, are you prepared to hear about her sexual encounters, dates, etc.? might not be the best way to heal from a long relationship. seems more like torture imo
but rly the friends thing would be a big no no for me... how can you have any respect for someone who would do that to you? IMO the hanging out with the guy while you were dating is cheating.
let me rephrase...i dont rly believe in girls or guys in committed relationships hanging out with people of the opposite sex 1 on 1 just doesnt seem appropriate to me idk
... but ESPECIALLY if she met this guy after the fact the 2 of you were dating... you have to wonder what her intentions really are there.bored? curious? sounds sneaky, and deceiving to me. you made the right choice, however i just dont know how you would be able to look at this girl as your friend.
also, are you prepared to hear about her sexual encounters, dates, etc.? might not be the best way to heal from a long relationship. seems more like torture imo
The hair says it all
Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 7,566
Likes: 0
From: Manhattan, NYC
There are a very select few people who are capable of doing that. I know a few, I consider them sort of hyper social. Not the types of people I would want to date since I wouldn't be able to trust them.
Thread Starter
I Drive Like A Dick 8≈
Joined: Sep 2008
Posts: 1,519
Likes: 79
From: Calgary, Alberta
to answer previous questions no she isnt talking to him any more but is to his ex?? (i hope) girl friend. and ya hearing about other sexual encounters is definitly tourture and she doesnt get it unless its coming from me but at that its not the sex just that im going out with friends. if i can still be friends with her is still up for debate but over that time i became really good friends with the people close to her in her life so if not her i still want to be friends with them which would be really hard and akward but only time can tell right now.
thanks for the input not only is it good advice but the jokes are an awsome way to cheer up.
p.s. drinking really isnt my thing i just like the bar atmosphere and playing pool
thanks for the input not only is it good advice but the jokes are an awsome way to cheer up.
p.s. drinking really isnt my thing i just like the bar atmosphere and playing pool
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