So yeah Im a virgin...
I love Chanel
Joined: Aug 2007
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Kudos to you! I applaud you! Forget what your friends think! If they are really your friends they would accept you for who you are!
Besides, I commend you more for standing up for your beliefs and your convictions and that alone is a huge accomplishment!
I wish you the best and I hope you find the right girl....errr...woman to marry!
Besides, I commend you more for standing up for your beliefs and your convictions and that alone is a huge accomplishment!
I wish you the best and I hope you find the right girl....errr...woman to marry!
Thread Starter
an asshole from florida
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 9,405
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From: GO GATORS!
thanks bro. and yea my friends back home were a lot more encouraging, one is doing the same as me and the others are totally understanding. Its just the people i know up here are friends from school so im not too close to them, i honestly just call them friends because i really havent gotten around much to really meet people yet (argh bio major sucks)
But i mean im majoring pre dental, which is going to take up enough of my time, i dont need to be worrying about drama associated with sex and i dont need my mind wonderring more than it already does
But i mean im majoring pre dental, which is going to take up enough of my time, i dont need to be worrying about drama associated with sex and i dont need my mind wonderring more than it already does
I love Chanel
Joined: Aug 2007
Posts: 656
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^^^ I'm actually a FEMALE! haha
But yeah, you definitely got your priorities straight. Don't let anyone get in the way of your future. Besides, sex always complicates things. Unless people are really in love than they should make love. People just do it like it's a sport these days. It's pretty sad, really. Don't get caught up in that mess. So not worth it.
But yeah, you definitely got your priorities straight. Don't let anyone get in the way of your future. Besides, sex always complicates things. Unless people are really in love than they should make love. People just do it like it's a sport these days. It's pretty sad, really. Don't get caught up in that mess. So not worth it.
B A N N E D
Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 3,001
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From: in Madison, WI from Chicago, IL
also I totally agree with ATL however I believe that its not totally impossible to have those things he described if you've already had sex, especially with the person you're gonna marry (not that you said it was). I just think if you REALLY care, you'll try hard enough to put that person before you and concentrate on being a good husband... most people don't realize that sex isnt everything and there are things more important in life and love and also most people are more selfish than the really think they are. Coming from a broken home since I was 5, my dad was around but lived an hour away and did the every other weekend deal, I've always promised 2 things, 1. I won't get married until I am 110% sure shes the right one and 2. If she isn't I'll try everything in my power to make it work, especially if children are in the picture. Having or not having sex isn't the key... making the right choices and being selfless is... its just probably a lot easier if youre not always worrying about gettin a piece of ass.
Atl/Mia reppin'
Joined: Oct 2001
Posts: 1,442
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From: Atlanta, GA
TSX, you're right - alot of people do get married pretty early if they try waiting...I wouldn't recommend waiting too long because most of us wouldn't make it. I was 28, my wife 26. I'm an engineer and she's a pharmacist, so at least we aren't doing this straight out of high school 
Being selfless is probably the most important part people miss about a relationship in general. It's not just saving the sex until marriage that makes it special...it's saving the intimacy as well. That's one of the biggest reasons girls give it up for the first time - they want to feel closer to the guy they are with, and us guys make it clear that sex is what makes us happy. You protect a girl's heart (whether its for you to marry her later, or for another guy who ends up marrying that girl) and you'll always have that woman's respect.
In the end, that is what a man wants. To be respected.
Being selfless is probably the most important part people miss about a relationship in general. It's not just saving the sex until marriage that makes it special...it's saving the intimacy as well. That's one of the biggest reasons girls give it up for the first time - they want to feel closer to the guy they are with, and us guys make it clear that sex is what makes us happy. You protect a girl's heart (whether its for you to marry her later, or for another guy who ends up marrying that girl) and you'll always have that woman's respect.
In the end, that is what a man wants. To be respected.
Last edited by ATLcl98; Oct 12, 2007 at 07:40 AM. Reason: add a word
Suzuka Master
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 6,251
Likes: 71
From: D.istrict of C.orruption
Originally Posted by ATLcl98
Hopefully I can give you a different perspective. I waited to have sex until I got married...until I was 28. It wasn't easy, especially through college and growing up in Miami. I know it's not easy when you're getting alot of crap from your friends, etc. but the other guy was right when he said it ends in your early 20s. People will respect you as you get older, even if they don't agree with you.
Let me tell you, it's tough to wait. But it's worth it. I won't pretend and tell you my wedding night was magical. My wife was a virgin too, and we didn't even end up having sex on our honeymoon cause it was too painful for her. But over time, it gets better and better and I'm glad we can share something so intimate with each other. And yeah - the sex is awesome now.
Having sex within the commitment of marriage gives you and your wife freedom to be yourselves and to strengthen a relationship you're going to have for the rest of your life. You have to choose for yourself what you're going to do, but I can tell you that I'm not any less of a man for waiting. As a matter of fact, it's helped to make me a better husband because it helped me think of someone before myself.
Don't worry about slim pickings - there are lots of hot girls that want to wait....how many of them end up staying virgins depends on how many guys are willing to push them pass their boundaries.
Let me tell you, it's tough to wait. But it's worth it. I won't pretend and tell you my wedding night was magical. My wife was a virgin too, and we didn't even end up having sex on our honeymoon cause it was too painful for her. But over time, it gets better and better and I'm glad we can share something so intimate with each other. And yeah - the sex is awesome now.
Having sex within the commitment of marriage gives you and your wife freedom to be yourselves and to strengthen a relationship you're going to have for the rest of your life. You have to choose for yourself what you're going to do, but I can tell you that I'm not any less of a man for waiting. As a matter of fact, it's helped to make me a better husband because it helped me think of someone before myself.
Don't worry about slim pickings - there are lots of hot girls that want to wait....how many of them end up staying virgins depends on how many guys are willing to push them pass their boundaries.
A lot of people nowadays just view sex as a physical pleasure. But for some people like invisiblewar, it is more than that. I went through several serious relationships without sex because I didn't want any complications when I was younger. I eventually felt I was ready for it a couple of years ago. And you know what? I found sex to be fun and exhilarating, but I think indulging in at the beginning of the relationship takes the focus away from getting to know one another beyond the physical level. I am not really saying we should wait for sex until marriage, I just think it's better to postpone it until a strong emotional connection is established. I asked my fiancee once if he would have continued dating me if I didn't put out and he said yes. So in a way, waiting for sex can be a good thing because you are assured that the person is dating you because he truly loves and respects you (and not just after some ass).
B A N N E D
Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 3,001
Likes: 0
From: in Madison, WI from Chicago, IL
Originally Posted by ATLcl98
TSX, you're right - alot of people do get married pretty early if they try waiting...I wouldn't recommend waiting too long because most of us wouldn't make it. I was 28, my wife 26. I'm an engineer and she's a pharmacist, so at least we aren't doing this straight out of high school
Being selfless is probably the most important part people miss about a relationship in general. It's not just saving the sex until marriage that makes it special...it's saving the intimacy as well. That's one of the biggest reasons girls give it up for the first time - they want to feel closer to the guy they are with, and us guys make it clear that sex is what makes us happy. You protect a girl's heart (whether its for you to marry her later, or for another guy who ends up marrying that girl) and you'll always have that woman's respect.
In the end, that is what a man wants. To be respected.
Being selfless is probably the most important part people miss about a relationship in general. It's not just saving the sex until marriage that makes it special...it's saving the intimacy as well. That's one of the biggest reasons girls give it up for the first time - they want to feel closer to the guy they are with, and us guys make it clear that sex is what makes us happy. You protect a girl's heart (whether its for you to marry her later, or for another guy who ends up marrying that girl) and you'll always have that woman's respect.
In the end, that is what a man wants. To be respected.
1919
Joined: Mar 2005
Posts: 21,467
Likes: 162
Originally Posted by ATLcl98
Hopefully I can give you a different perspective. I waited to have sex until I got married...until I was 28. It wasn't easy, especially through college and growing up in Miami. I know it's not easy when you're getting alot of crap from your friends, etc. but the other guy was right when he said it ends in your early 20s. People will respect you as you get older, even if they don't agree with you.
Let me tell you, it's tough to wait. But it's worth it. I won't pretend and tell you my wedding night was magical. My wife was a virgin too, and we didn't even end up having sex on our honeymoon cause it was too painful for her. But over time, it gets better and better and I'm glad we can share something so intimate with each other. And yeah - the sex is awesome now.
Having sex within the commitment of marriage gives you and your wife freedom to be yourselves and to strengthen a relationship you're going to have for the rest of your life. You have to choose for yourself what you're going to do, but I can tell you that I'm not any less of a man for waiting. As a matter of fact, it's helped to make me a better husband because it helped me think of someone before myself.
Don't worry about slim pickings - there are lots of hot girls that want to wait....how many of them end up staying virgins depends on how many guys are willing to push them pass their boundaries.
Let me tell you, it's tough to wait. But it's worth it. I won't pretend and tell you my wedding night was magical. My wife was a virgin too, and we didn't even end up having sex on our honeymoon cause it was too painful for her. But over time, it gets better and better and I'm glad we can share something so intimate with each other. And yeah - the sex is awesome now.
Having sex within the commitment of marriage gives you and your wife freedom to be yourselves and to strengthen a relationship you're going to have for the rest of your life. You have to choose for yourself what you're going to do, but I can tell you that I'm not any less of a man for waiting. As a matter of fact, it's helped to make me a better husband because it helped me think of someone before myself.
Don't worry about slim pickings - there are lots of hot girls that want to wait....how many of them end up staying virgins depends on how many guys are willing to push them pass their boundaries.
Curious question (and please don't answer if it's too personal), but would you have married or dated a girl if she wasn't a virgin?
I'm just wondering if that would take the special feeling away from it all if your partner hadn't saved herself....
Atl/Mia reppin'
Joined: Oct 2001
Posts: 1,442
Likes: 0
From: Atlanta, GA
I think it would be tough, but it could be done. If you're a guy though and you're a virgin and you know your girl has been tapped before, I think it would be tough for her to hold out with you until marriage, and it would be hard as a guy not to try to have sex with her since you know she's already done it.
I think that sex could still have been special if my wife hadn't saved herself...but it definitely wouldn't be as special. I feel like alot of insecurities about if I'm making her feel as good as other guys, or whether I was thinking about past girls, etc. aren't as much of an issue.
I think that sex could still have been special if my wife hadn't saved herself...but it definitely wouldn't be as special. I feel like alot of insecurities about if I'm making her feel as good as other guys, or whether I was thinking about past girls, etc. aren't as much of an issue.
1919
Joined: Mar 2005
Posts: 21,467
Likes: 162
Originally Posted by ATLcl98
I think it would be tough, but it could be done. If you're a guy though and you're a virgin and you know your girl has been tapped before, I think it would be tough for her to hold out with you until marriage, and it would be hard as a guy not to try to have sex with her since you know she's already done it.
I think that sex could still have been special if my wife hadn't saved herself...but it definitely wouldn't be as special. I feel like alot of insecurities about if I'm making her feel as good as other guys, or whether I was thinking about past girls, etc. aren't as much of an issue.
I think that sex could still have been special if my wife hadn't saved herself...but it definitely wouldn't be as special. I feel like alot of insecurities about if I'm making her feel as good as other guys, or whether I was thinking about past girls, etc. aren't as much of an issue.
Yeah, I just think it would be weird for someone if they saved themselves for all that time, then started dating a girl that wasn't a virgin, and eventually married them.
I would imagine there would be a lot of insecurities once they did start having sex (like you said), and some hesitation as to whether or not they would want to marry that girl.
I just hope someone wouldn't decide not to marry a person just because they were a virgin and their partner wasn't. If someone thought like that, that's really the only problem I see with the whole thing.
Thanks for answering...reps
Thread Starter
an asshole from florida
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 9,405
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From: GO GATORS!
It could happen. Ive dated girls who have slept with other guys before. There is somewhat of an akwardness for me. I have thought about whether i would marry a girl who has had sex before even though i havent and if i truly was in love with her id just have to kick myself in the ass and deal with it
like atl said it wouldnt be as special though, it would just seem like a personal achievement then instead of someething special that two people share
like atl said it wouldnt be as special though, it would just seem like a personal achievement then instead of someething special that two people share
1919
Joined: Mar 2005
Posts: 21,467
Likes: 162
Originally Posted by invisiblewar
It could happen. Ive dated girls who have slept with other guys before. There is somewhat of an akwardness for me. I have thought about whether i would marry a girl who has had sex before even though i havent and if i truly was in love with her id just have to kick myself in the ass and deal with it
like atl said it wouldnt be as special though, it would just seem like a personal achievement then instead of someething special that two people share
like atl said it wouldnt be as special though, it would just seem like a personal achievement then instead of someething special that two people share
And that is why I worry you will regret your decision once you get older.
What good is it if it just turns into a personal achievement and there's nothing special about it?
Racer
Joined: Sep 2007
Posts: 341
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From: Witness Protection Program Somewhere, USA
I want to commend you on obeying GODS command. The best thing you can do for your future marrage and wife is to stay virgin.......In MY opinion, sex before you're married ruins your future relationships...I started having sex at 15 and I truely wish I wouldn't have started. Sure it was fun, sex is supposed to be fun. GOD made it that way...Any friend that is encouraging you to go ahead and do it as some on this forum are, are NOT your friends...It's like they are the devil on your shoulder. DON'T give in to the temptation. You will be happy you didn't when you finally do get married...I would make sure my future wife was virign too. It's really the best way to start off your life if you want to get married one time til death do you part.
Japan here I come.....
Joined: May 2005
Posts: 83
Likes: 0
I think that's very noble and spiritual of you. I really commend you. I wish I would have done the same thing, but then I wouldn't have my two beautiful kids. There are alot of things I wish I could have done differently but it is what it is. It takes a strong person to not fall into peer pressure and the weakness of the flesh. You will be very happy that you waited and your wife will feel so special that she was your first. I commend you.
Old Man Yelling at Clouds
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 16,973
Likes: 7,362
From: Seattle, WA
Let me tell you what that decision will mean to you 22 years from now. I made it until age 20 when I knew I was with my future wife, and we've been together for 21 years, married for 17.
Looking back I would not change a thing. I didn't miss out on enjoying the company of a woman (in spite of not sleeping with them), didn't miss a dance, had a girlfriend fairly consistently for the 5 years leading up to when I met my wife. I had my chances, and a few explicit offers, but never went there.
I'll tell you what's great - I don't have to worry about who an old girlfriend was with, or who my wife has been with. When we're together, she's not competing with the memory of some other girl. It's a peace of mind that's hard to describe. I don't ever wish I'd slept with any of my other girlfriends - not once in the 21 years we've been together.
It's difficult, but I'd encourage you in the strongest possible way to stick to your decision. In spite of what you may feel like you're missing out on now, 5 years from now you'll realize you didn't miss a thing. Good luck -
Looking back I would not change a thing. I didn't miss out on enjoying the company of a woman (in spite of not sleeping with them), didn't miss a dance, had a girlfriend fairly consistently for the 5 years leading up to when I met my wife. I had my chances, and a few explicit offers, but never went there.
I'll tell you what's great - I don't have to worry about who an old girlfriend was with, or who my wife has been with. When we're together, she's not competing with the memory of some other girl. It's a peace of mind that's hard to describe. I don't ever wish I'd slept with any of my other girlfriends - not once in the 21 years we've been together.
It's difficult, but I'd encourage you in the strongest possible way to stick to your decision. In spite of what you may feel like you're missing out on now, 5 years from now you'll realize you didn't miss a thing. Good luck -
Racer
Joined: Sep 2007
Posts: 341
Likes: 0
From: Witness Protection Program Somewhere, USA
Originally Posted by 1Louder
Let me tell you what that decision will mean to you 22 years from now. I made it until age 20 when I knew I was with my future wife, and we've been together for 21 years, married for 17.
Looking back I would not change a thing. I didn't miss out on enjoying the company of a woman (in spite of not sleeping with them), didn't miss a dance, had a girlfriend fairly consistently for the 5 years leading up to when I met my wife. I had my chances, and a few explicit offers, but never went there.
I'll tell you what's great - I don't have to worry about who an old girlfriend was with, or who my wife has been with. When we're together, she's not competing with the memory of some other girl. It's a peace of mind that's hard to describe. I don't ever wish I'd slept with any of my other girlfriends - not once in the 21 years we've been together.
It's difficult, but I'd encourage you in the strongest possible way to stick to your decision. In spite of what you may feel like you're missing out on now, 5 years from now you'll realize you didn't miss a thing. Good luck -
Looking back I would not change a thing. I didn't miss out on enjoying the company of a woman (in spite of not sleeping with them), didn't miss a dance, had a girlfriend fairly consistently for the 5 years leading up to when I met my wife. I had my chances, and a few explicit offers, but never went there.
I'll tell you what's great - I don't have to worry about who an old girlfriend was with, or who my wife has been with. When we're together, she's not competing with the memory of some other girl. It's a peace of mind that's hard to describe. I don't ever wish I'd slept with any of my other girlfriends - not once in the 21 years we've been together.
It's difficult, but I'd encourage you in the strongest possible way to stick to your decision. In spite of what you may feel like you're missing out on now, 5 years from now you'll realize you didn't miss a thing. Good luck -
AMEN !
This is the best comment that you could have to the original post. Advise from someone who's been there and done that. Listen to this guy, he KNOWS what he's talking about !
Thread Starter
an asshole from florida
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 9,405
Likes: 17
From: GO GATORS!
Originally Posted by 1Louder
Let me tell you what that decision will mean to you 22 years from now. I made it until age 20 when I knew I was with my future wife, and we've been together for 21 years, married for 17.
Looking back I would not change a thing. I didn't miss out on enjoying the company of a woman (in spite of not sleeping with them), didn't miss a dance, had a girlfriend fairly consistently for the 5 years leading up to when I met my wife. I had my chances, and a few explicit offers, but never went there.
I'll tell you what's great - I don't have to worry about who an old girlfriend was with, or who my wife has been with. When we're together, she's not competing with the memory of some other girl. It's a peace of mind that's hard to describe. I don't ever wish I'd slept with any of my other girlfriends - not once in the 21 years we've been together.
It's difficult, but I'd encourage you in the strongest possible way to stick to your decision. In spite of what you may feel like you're missing out on now, 5 years from now you'll realize you didn't miss a thing. Good luck -
Looking back I would not change a thing. I didn't miss out on enjoying the company of a woman (in spite of not sleeping with them), didn't miss a dance, had a girlfriend fairly consistently for the 5 years leading up to when I met my wife. I had my chances, and a few explicit offers, but never went there.
I'll tell you what's great - I don't have to worry about who an old girlfriend was with, or who my wife has been with. When we're together, she's not competing with the memory of some other girl. It's a peace of mind that's hard to describe. I don't ever wish I'd slept with any of my other girlfriends - not once in the 21 years we've been together.
It's difficult, but I'd encourage you in the strongest possible way to stick to your decision. In spite of what you may feel like you're missing out on now, 5 years from now you'll realize you didn't miss a thing. Good luck -
This is basically me ranting. Now on to the topic
So basically Im planning on waiting til I get married til I have sex. Kinda a religious thing for me. And no Im not a social retard or really weird ass kick who masturbates to Tifa (ff7). Seriously If i wanted to get laid I could go to my neighbors place and get it on (shes got a huge rack too). Ive been in situations before and I can and have said no.
It really just pisses me off when my so called friends nag my ass about how Im still a virgin. Seriously they try to talk to me as if they know so much more. And yea Ive come to realize that Im missing out on some fun times (specially here in UF, wow every other girl is bangin hot) But really I want there to be that special thing that only me and my future wife share( whomever it may be)
So yea I just wanted to get it off my back comments and concerns are welcome
So basically Im planning on waiting til I get married til I have sex. Kinda a religious thing for me. And no Im not a social retard or really weird ass kick who masturbates to Tifa (ff7). Seriously If i wanted to get laid I could go to my neighbors place and get it on (shes got a huge rack too). Ive been in situations before and I can and have said no.
It really just pisses me off when my so called friends nag my ass about how Im still a virgin. Seriously they try to talk to me as if they know so much more. And yea Ive come to realize that Im missing out on some fun times (specially here in UF, wow every other girl is bangin hot) But really I want there to be that special thing that only me and my future wife share( whomever it may be)
So yea I just wanted to get it off my back comments and concerns are welcome
and how did Mizouse keep from posting in it?
Registered but harmless
Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 14,889
Likes: 1,164
From: Los Angeles, CA
i say you bang as many chicks as you can while in your late teens to 20's b/c when you're in your 30's or older and see some hot young ass you'll be like "damn, i want to hit that". if you bang them now, you'll be like "i use to rail hot chicks like that" and you'll have some nice memories
Senior Moderator
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 47,710
Likes: 801
From: Toronto, Canada
just have sex already, dont be a little bitch. Yea its your beliefs but you will have to marry some church girl to marry a virgin. And if you tell a girl thats had sex that you wanna wait till you get married, you are getting dumped my friend. Sex is just too much fun to pass up on and when you are 40 years old you will regret not having as much of it as possible. Cuz once you get married sex life is shit (so i have herd). fuck teh hot neighbour and be happy