You break up with your girl, and the next month some guy (who you've known for years, and been boys with for awhile) starts hooking up with her because they go to school near eachother. Would that piss you off?

 

No.

You and her are over, she can date who she wants and so can your boy. If you get pissed off you're a stalker in training.

 

Depends on how long you were with her, and who broke it off. If more than a few months or she broke up with you, you have a right to be pissed.

 

^^^But he said "if you broke up with her." it would kinda suck if she started right away, but you can't really be mad either way. just take consolation in the fact that your "boy" is just picking up the trash that you've discarded probably because he can't get with anyone else.

 

As long as he doesn't bring her around me I wouldn't be bothered really.

 

Depends how serious you were with this girl and how close you were with this friend.

 

In my case, my ex and I ended a 6.5 year relationship back in 2001...and within 2 months, a guy I considered one of my closest friends starts dating her. They are still together to this day...and we have not spoken a word since.

 

^^
Sometimes it's tough not to be attracted to your friends' girls if you're around them all the time. I'd do all sorts of things to one of my best friend's girl.

 

I understand why you decided not to speak with them but at the same time maybe be happy that they both found someone. Things happen for a reason, you moved on and found someone else (right?) and have no regrets (I hope).

But I completely understand if you don't see it that way.

 

Yeah i'm not actually that mad, it's just i found out and saw them together last night (and was slightly inebriated), this was more of a venting post. but we were together for 3-4 months, and me and this guy haven't really chilled in like half a year. and the breakup was more-or-less mutual, long-distance doesn't work out generally.

good replies though, helps me put things into prospective

 

Yeah, I have moved on...my current GF is fantastic and I am indeed better off now.

That being said, the bitter taste of what my "friend" did to me while I was still trying to get over my ex--I'll never forget...and for that, I can't bring myself to forgive him...and it's been 5 years now too. Dunno if I ever will...

 

McCready shouldn't be so mad since it obviously was not a good friend nor was it a meaningful relationship especially once you put your ago into perspective...

However Yumchah...

If one of my close friends started dating a recent ex of mine that I had vested a considerable amount of time, I'd cross him off my list as well. I think there is a general "Man's Rule" like "Bro's before hoes". There are countless women available and why would you sacrifice a long friendship to get your friends recyclables (not intended to seem so direct). This seems to be a practice, no offense that is fairly common with women. Obviously he knew and had to weigh the consequences beforehand and felt he'd rather pick up your old lady then to be your pal so F him.

 

Exactly my sentiments.

 

Just because he broke up with her, doesnt make her trash .

 

I think the rule of thumb is your friend needs to check with you and get your ok. Not that its needed, but unless he wants to tank your friendship, its a big nono.

 

He pretty much summed it up to the T.

 

I agree with checking it out with you first (re: the guy). If he asks you like a man ... then there's no reason why you should be mad at him. However, due to the circumstances and that you're not really a close friend ...

Again ... depends on how close you and your ex were. (As for me ... I couldn't wait until my ex got over me ... made me feel way less guilty )

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Yumchah -- I think perhaps the example you provided and the response given was due to the length of time in the commitment plus the age you were during that commitment. If my math was any good, you were probably in your teens ... and most of us didn't have much control with our hormones + our feelings during this time. Hopefully, looking back ... you should let it go. (Not talking to them may sound harsh but I go out and call them up on the phone to have ... say ... dim sum together.)

 

I wouldn't care. An X is an X for a reason. Doesn't matter if it's 3 days, 3 months, or 3 years. Let some other guy deal with it. If it's over..... I move on.

 

You've got a right to be mildly pissed, but she's a free agent, and it wasn't as if this was the relationship to end all relationships.... So you can't do anything about it without looking like a neanderthal.

If anything, I'd contact your friend and complement him on his good taste in women.....

 

I would say it kinda depends. If you guys dated for a while and ended messy, and a month later you boy starts dating her, I would be a bit pissed.

If you guys were only together for a short time, and just split up, then why should it matter.

If it really bothers you, talk to your friend and see what he has to say. I think letting it go is probably the mature thing to do.

My wife dated one of my friends for a couple weeks, nothing serious. A couple years later, I started dating her, and he was PISSED. A while later, he told me he really over-reacted.

 

Ok so maybe I'll substitute another term, like "free-agent" or something to that effect. Point is, HE broke up with her so he's saying he's finished with her one way or another.

Plus i never said she was trashy like she's a trashy girl...just that one man's trash is another man's treasure type of thing.

 

Double Agent?

 

Not really.

 

Both of them are free to date who they choose.

You are free to associate as friends with who you choose.

No wrong or right here.

 

if he was a homie then he would ask first. but man-law says that its a 6 month waiting period.