VITEK

Your a chick?

stphy32

Um yes.

There could be a few things with her, maybe...

Maybe she just wanted to lose her virginity and get sex over with and she trusts you or...

Maybe she has always loved you and wanted you to be her first..

or maybe she just got horny and said F it

Da_iLLeZt_TL973

lol wow my nig you assed out buddy...she owns you now cuz you do know that whoever a female loses her virginity to she will stalk for the rest of her life...lol but in a sense it would be fukked up if you guys stopped speaking just because of that i mean if she didnt like you she would not have given you the first of it feel me?.....so just take it slow with the shorty and see whats wrong with her let her know that yo you not gonna let that ruin your relationship with her feel me good luck pimpin

Da_iLLeZt_TL973

WAIT....i have an idea WIFE HER!!!1.....not many 20 years olds out there that are virgins remember that especially after college make that yours for real so you know that you were the only one to hit it and have it to yourself! do that trust me you'll be a happy man....not only that but she loves you so it would be fucked up to break her heart

CL Platano

just keep calling her and let her make the decision.

swong

Come on... be a bit positive here. I think she likes him quite a bit. It is not like that anyone will just say "I Love you" for no reason (but then... I may be too naive). If he likes her too, I say he should go for it. It might have an happy ending. At least he likes her company and seems like she could be his soulmate.

cM3go

I just went through this. I'm actually still goin through it. I just hooked up with my best friend. Its better than you think. I know you're scared, you don't want to mess up the friendship, but honestly, you guys were always kinda together, the stuff you two do together, its pretty much was a relationship, its just on the verge of being official. Enjoy it, don't worry about what could go wrong cause you'll end up fucking it up then. You never know until you try.

stphy32

Hey! You left out what I said in the middle which is what is probably the truth

65 Fury Convert

Vitek, your first post sounded like a scene from a porn movie I think you 2 crazy kids should start dating - it sounds like you 2 make a good couple.

Have you 2 talked yet?

Locojr

It takes two to get it on like Donkey Kong and now you must decide how you really feel, don’t get into a relationship just because you had sex. I think it will help if you take charge and tell her if you do or do not want a relationship instead of being indifferent. Try to think how you felt about her before the sex. You say you guys are great friends and she is open minded, so if you don’t really like her then you have a good chance of remaining friends.

CLPowersWife

Wow, VITEK, I'm impressed! You sound really, truly concerned about this girl, which is so unusual for most posters in D&R...

I think you guys should date. Tell her your feelings about being afraid to ruin the friendship, but make sure and stress that it's because you REALLY REALLY value her as a person and you'd rather have her as a friend than not at all. But I think she wants to be with you. Your little conversation this morning makes it sound like that.

And virginity is a very important thing... if she was able to hold onto it all thru high school and most of college, she didn't just decide to "get it over with" with you. She WANTED you to be the first, and in a lot of ways, that makes sense. She knows you, she knows you aren't an asshole, you aren't diseased, you aren't a player, you genuinely care about her, and even if the worst case scenario happens and you guys don't turn into a couple, at least she can always say that she chose a good one to be the first.

So if you care about her, let her make the call. If she wants to be a couple, well, how bad could that be? If she just wants to be friends, I'm sure you can respect that, since you seem to already respect her so much.

VITEK

Im at work right now, no i havent called her, Its only 11:10 AM my time so its still early.... but umm I just dont know. mabey it is a good thing. I dunno guys this is a really hard decision, mabey ill just be quiet and let her do the talking, and if we end up going out, she said it first, and if we're friends then we will be friends. I just too scared that somethign may not work. I't be cool if it did, im afraid of loosing a friend if the relationship dont work.

65 Fury Convert

Vitek, just tell her what you're thinking. It doesn't sound like you want to date her though.

sasha

She knows that you are aware that she was still a virgin and the fact that you took it willingly makes her believe that your feelings for her are more than platonic. I believe she has been in-love with you for a long time but she was not sure where you stand. So when you started fooling around which led to sex, she got the reassurance that you find her attractive as well.

Now that you both explicitely said "I love you" to one another, she will probably want to pursue a serious relationship with you. You better decide whether you want her as a girlfriend rather than leading her on, making her bitter, and eventually ending the friendship. It's a hard choice to make but you'll just have to be brave about it.

65 Fury Convert

He said "I love you" to her? I totally missed that. Right after the sex? I gotta find where you read this.

65 Fury Convert

Man I missed that. to me. So you 2 did talk. You said the right thing to her by telling her to decide what she wants - the balls in her court. Good job my friend.

dom

VITEK

no not right after sex, go back to page 2

rise

Wow...I don't even know what to think if a friendgirl told me she loved me...it'd probably be followed with "just kidding"

VITEK

well we always said that to each other. so it was nothing new. its just the WAY she said it on the phone

VITEK

NAAA! I'd rather have a friend. I'm serious. If i want some ass I can get it. but I Am not like that and NO PUSSY feels good enough to cover the pain of a Lost LOVED TRUE FRIEND. Like its soo hard to freakin make up my mind, its soo hard to Even understand.



I called her on my lunchbreak and told her im comming over after work, her mom needs me to do her a favor anyway so, we'll have a chanve to talk about things. but im just wondering how the conversation will end, good. bad. I DONT KNOW!


But im gonna tell her if Theres a chance ill lose her as a friend I DONT WANA DATE HER. but if we can come to an understanding that A RELATIONSHIP WILL NOT WORK and we can still be friends, mabey it will make us stronger friends. I'm not sure. Yes I care about the girl Dearly, I Just dont want to upset Either one of us.

DDT-TypeS

You know when lions and tigers and other shit animals in the jungle fool around, they end up fuckin' each other too. It's just nature doing its thing. For humans, there are more repercussions when not thinking over something before doing it.

You fucked her...took her virginity. At least you know you are a true friend to her and she didn't get it robbed by some O.G. asian dood. Just tell her the truth about how you feel. It's not that hard man...it is only hard when you actually have some feelings for her.

One thing in life I have learned the really hard way is don't settle for something you half want. Settle for something you really want. It applies to everything including supermodels. Knowing what you want to begin with will make you a very successful person in life.

So in your case, do you really want her or not? If not, just say so...and move on. If she wants to be your fuck buddy, hey, it's ok. In china, a man can have as many mistresses as he pleases. You have the same delimma as mesmerize...shit or get off the pot. Good luck, keep us updated.

AS3.0CL

she obviousely has liked you for a long time, and actually love you. But she probably has been to scared to actually tell you that she liked you more then just a friend. Then you two get caught up in the moment and then you have sex. like some else said, with you two hanging out and doing things it's like a relationship but not official. you two obviousely know alot about each other and for her to allow you, even choose you to take her virginity is a big deal, so you must mean alot to her. just talk to her and tell her where you stand, and let her make the decision of if she wants to continue into a relationship with you. just give it time, your freindship will not be lost, but this is alot of things to take in. and good luck with the situation.

VITEK

LMAO.... NO i dont want to be her fuck buddy, i dont even worry bout ass like that.

If i know we can still have a FRIENDSHIP if the RELATIONSHIP ends... THEN ILL DATE HER, IF WE CANNOT BE FRIENDS BECAUSE OF AN ENDED RELATIONSHIP I DONT WANT IT

DDT-TypeS

Dude, you can't have her on the side like that. True love is something that is to be cherised by each other. There is no one way thing. If you aren't thinking for yourself, think it for her. She loves you enough to give you her body. You take her up on the offer but then you say, sorry, I can't reciprocate the love. I only want to keep the same thing we had before intercourse.

BULLSHIT. Dude, you're only going to have one or the other...if you think about it, you can have BOTH. If you choose her then you guys can be friends and at teh same time lovers.

AGain, it's simple: IF YOU DO NOT RECIPROCATE THE FEELINGS...it's time to spill the beans and tell her the truth. You are an asshole if you keep the real feelings from her. Like I said before, no man and woman can be just friends. Since you penetrated her and she actually has feelings for you, it's even more ludicrous.

Time to tell the TRUTH! If she's actually game with your plan, then hey, you're all set! I doubt she would...but then again, love can make anyone do the dumbest shit.

VITEK

no no no you got me all wrong. what im saying is IF we go out and have a bf gf relationship and the relationship ends later down the road i want to know that we can still be freinds,

IF we date and she knows she cant be my friend if we break up, then i wont date her.


MAKE SENSE NOW???



Basically im scared that if we date. and end up breaking up the RELATIONSHIP later on.


she may not be my friend, and i'd rather keep her as a friend forever than a girlfriend for a little while. IF YOU DONT UNDERSTAND.

Im clueless on how to make you understand

DDT-TypeS

Dude, it's hard as hell to even predict the weather..let alone how you guys would feel in the future. come on man, just date and see how things go. You'll be surprised if she turns out to be your dream girl...but then she loses the spark for you and eyes another man..you're ass will be like, "fuck, I shoulda just went with it rather than being scared".

There are no promises in life. Just wing it mang!

ShibbidyDibbidy

i have wrestled 8 yrs and never seen a boner on the mat i just think ur looking too hard

dom

How can you possibly get any guarantees from her that if the relationship ends you can still be friends?

GO FOR IT, this could be the best thing thats ever happened to you. Or the worst buy you'll never know until you find out.

VITEK

thats what im afraid of....

cM3go

You've already crossed the line, if you think you can go back to being just friends like the way you were, you are wrong, IT IS IMPOSSIBLE

Take a risk in life, go for the relationship.

dom

This happened to someone else on the board not too long ago, can't remember who.

The relationship was over because she wanted more than the freindship. I'll bet my life this will be no different. At least try and make it work, The way I see it you have no other choice.

Good luck.

VITEK

Well, I'll try..... I just dont want things going for worse, you know?

ric

I think the best relationships have a rich quality of friendship.

One or the other of you has to "blink first". Since it was not your first time, but hers, I think you gotta do the gentlemanly thing, and call her up for a heart/heart. You need to find out where her head is at, and where yours is.

You could both agree that it never happened, and be good friends exclusively - this is what proper WASPs would do... It is a real stuffed shirt response, but pretty repressed.

You can understand that you have ripped to shreds the very fabric of your relationship in one madcap moment of bestial sexuality - improbable, but it depends on how she sees sex and sexual expression

You can understand that, perhaps, your feelings for each other may have had more than friendhsip as a subtext for some time and that it may be time to look at your friendship in a different venue. I married my best friend after we tumbled into bed, and we're about to celebrate our 20th.

You can talk about it, decide that it was a rich experience for the moment, but that the two of you choose not to do that again. If you and she are mature, and hat it what you want, you two can "talk it out".

In any case, figuring out any/some/all of the above will require talking.........

virtualbong

Give it a few days and she'll get over it or at least start talking to you about it, then you can smooth things over.

Gpump

I dated a best friend for 3 years in high school/college. Worked great, we just sort of got tired of each other eventually. It will only fuck up your relationship if you suddenly change and treat her like a piece of ass - if you're the same guy you always were and things don't work out then so be it - she'll recognize she didn't really want the dating relationship but should be able to handle keeping your friendship. Of course, that is dependent upon you also being able to handle "just being friends" after dating. Go for it - just don't do some 180 degree personality shift and you ought to be fine. Treat her how you have always treated her - she apparently liked that person.

Titand19

This is what you need to do if you just want to be friends.





Beat off a ton of times before you go an hang out with her because you know you will want to hit it when you see her. Obviously she has no problem screwing you since you were her first.






Oh and if you don't want to screw her when you see her you are officially :ghey:

RWalker2

Go for it.

You will always have that tension and things will never be quite the same. Therefore you must try a relationship - it seems it has the basis to workout well. I had the same thing at the end of HS. Lots of history between us, but nothing serious but we just decided... f it lets try, and its been amazing. Shame I can't see her much in college though.

sxlova07

I agree with the wife her comment. Funny enough i am in a very similar situation. Except I was the 2nd person she has been with (she wished I was her first). And I know that I am going to wife her, once I stop talkin with other females (curse my playa ways). As weird as the situation might be, it very well can be a blessing in disguise. But take your time and make sure you two communicate about how you feel. Hope it works out fo ya either way.

goldendragon576

I think that's key. I dated my best friend of 13 years, we had an awesome time together but as great as our relationship as friends was, being a romantic relationship was totally different. Although it screwed our friendship for a year i never stopped treating her the way I always did. We're back to being great friends.