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Jealousy

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Old 02-02-2005, 01:02 PM
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Jealousy

such a unattractive thing... i've been w/ my girl for three months or so now, and jealousy is starting to overcome me... i dont want to be a jealous boyfriend.

its so powerful, it takes me over so quickly, its like i'm powerless against it...

i know if i continue w/ my jealous feelings.. it will be the end of my relationship, and i dont want that. My girl is jealous too @ times, but i havent given her many reasons to act on it.

the most recent example is an old friend that she hasnt seen for 'four years' came into town and one of their friends called me to get a hold of my girl so they can chill... she seemed pretty excited when she heard the message and i got pissed right away, i tried to hide my frustration but i'm a terrible poker face.

btw, shes never given me a reason to not trust her~
Old 02-02-2005, 01:05 PM
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Women love jealous boyfriends.....
Old 02-02-2005, 01:06 PM
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Talk to her about it. If you have a terrible poker face, you should definitely say that you know it's an irrational response on your part, or else she'll think you're really jealous and upset when she sees guy friends. She'll get tired of the act really quick.
Old 02-02-2005, 01:26 PM
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hell no. It gets old really quick.
Originally Posted by wsklar
Women love jealous boyfriends.....
Old 02-02-2005, 01:49 PM
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Originally Posted by Michiraces2much
hell no. It gets old really quick.

i completely agree...initially, they like the fact that "awww, he's getting jealous, that's sooo cute and adorable"...but once you get into the relationship and time goes buy and you are still a jealous guy, then she'll say "i can't believe that he still doesn't trust me after all this time...it's pathetic and ridiculous"

trust me on this man...i trusted my previous gf, but i just didn't trust the guys around her...however that relationship failed because of my jealousy/possessiveness/over-protective, whatever you want to call it...

now, in my current relationship, i really have 100% trust in my girl and i know she would NEVER do anything to hurt my feelings and i would NEVER do anything to hurt her feelings...and you may say, so you didn't trust your ex 100%...well i did, but her attitude towards guys approaching her and macking it was different than the attitude of my current gf...

basically, what i mean to say is this...chill out...don't worry about it...have some faith/hope/trust in the girl...u need to know that if a million rich great looking guys walked into the same room with your girl, then you know that she won't give a rat's ass about anyone in that room besides YOU!!!!....

so before you make things worse, jump off the jealousy boat and just have faith...it goes a LONGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG WAYYYYYYYYYY...
Old 02-02-2005, 02:16 PM
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jinen, i completely agree with you... everything u said i agree with but.... now, how do i stop?>
Old 02-02-2005, 02:22 PM
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Originally Posted by CLean B
now, how do i stop?>
kick the guy's ass.
Old 02-02-2005, 02:36 PM
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Originally Posted by car_lost
kick the guy's ass.

lol yea i dont even know him, or if shes even gonna talk/see him....
Old 02-02-2005, 02:45 PM
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Originally Posted by Michiraces2much
hell no. It gets old really quick.
i know it does, thats why i'm trying to figure this out for myself before it destroys my relationship which i really enjoy
Old 02-02-2005, 02:50 PM
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Originally Posted by CLean B
now, how do i stop?

Try reading this:

http://www.askmen.com/dating/dating_...ting_list.html
Old 02-02-2005, 02:52 PM
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CLean B, wanna play poker?

And yeah, read the askmen article. They give pretty good advice.
Old 02-02-2005, 03:02 PM
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Originally Posted by CLean B
now, how do i stop?>
I think what it comes down to is trust . I'm not sure you can completely get over it unless you deal with the trust issue or any other issues that are bringing on this jealousy. At least you can admit to it though, a lot of people don't think anything is wrong with being overly jealous. You're on the right track seeking help, good luck!
Old 02-02-2005, 07:01 PM
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Trust trust trust. Its that simple. If you trust her you should have absolutely nothing to worry about. If for some reason she breaks that trust, she'd not worthy of you. This is non-negotiable. Don't waste a single second having your mind get into a frenzy over thoughts of jealousy. I know it may seem tricky, but jealousy is the emotion that is the most evil, so beware!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Old 02-02-2005, 07:17 PM
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Originally Posted by TLover
wow thats insightful...

yea i talked to her about it, explained to her that as stated above "its an initial irrational reaction" .... she consoled me by saying "baby.. i dont want anybody but you, i dont enjoy anyones company as much as yours, nobodies jokes are as funny as yours.... please dont be mad @ me"

of course this was comforting as hell, and i know she is in love w/ me...

communication is so important..

of course i'm sure the jealousy will still be around, but i gotta stay on top of it
Old 02-02-2005, 07:21 PM
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Originally Posted by wsklar
Women love jealous boyfriends.....
but no "respect" for him.

In my book of "What women want" : jealous man = man with no confidence = petty loser
Old 02-02-2005, 07:23 PM
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Originally Posted by CLean B
now, how do i stop?
go shag a hooker


j/k
Old 02-02-2005, 08:20 PM
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hardly been jealous a day in my life why
Old 02-02-2005, 08:24 PM
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Originally Posted by dallison
hardly been jealous a day in my life why
you aint human ?
Old 02-02-2005, 08:36 PM
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I get jeaslous easily even if I dont like the girl.
Old 02-02-2005, 08:58 PM
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heh, I trusted my ex-wife to go on a cruise with her girlfriends.

She met a guy and moved out a week later to marry him.

So, sometimes jealousy is warranted. Especially if some guy is making a move on your girl. You need to nip that in the bud.
Old 02-02-2005, 09:23 PM
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Originally Posted by matelot
you aint human ?
no, prob have shagged too many women back in the day, and plus my woman isnt going anywhere
Old 02-02-2005, 09:31 PM
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Originally Posted by spidey07
heh, I trusted my ex-wife to go on a cruise with her girlfriends.

She met a guy and moved out a week later to marry him.

So, sometimes jealousy is warranted. Especially if some guy is making a move on your girl. You need to nip that in the bud.
this is like some movie script ! sorry
Old 02-03-2005, 12:54 AM
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Originally Posted by car_lost
kick the guy's ass.



but seriously, try to keep the jealousy in cause that shit could drive her away.

i use to get jealous with past gf's, but with the current gf i kinda trust her
becareful, jealousy can make you crazy...
Old 02-03-2005, 05:34 AM
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Originally Posted by CLean B
jinen, i completely agree with you... everything u said i agree with but.... now, how do i stop?>

Tell us whats going on and we will tell you if its warranted. Because if she is straight disrespecting you then you being jealous isn't the problem its her. Girls are not as stupid as they like to act, they know how things look and if she is your girlfriend she should have common sense not to do it. I know my girl trusts me but I am not going to tell her "Oh yeah me and a female friend are going to the movies" Oh yeah and if she is making new male friends left and right she needs to cut that shit out. I don't know many guys who befriend girls without ever thinking "Damn I might want to fuck her one day" and girls SHOULD know this as well.
Old 02-03-2005, 07:41 AM
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Let's look at the ROOT CAUSE of jealousy. The root cause is NO TRUST. If you trusted your mate completly jealousy would never enter the picture.

No Trust No relationship.
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