Yeah I was taken by surprise when I saw that. Well wait, I had my doubts she would want to hang out without a security detail. She grew up very sheltered from what my buddy at work told me and he said she's only had one serious relationship.

If she wants to hang out she'll have to call me. If the roles were reversed, (I do not believe her 100%) and I was invited to a game, but had a previous obligation. I would try to atleast see if I could meet up earlier or work around it.

I know where I stand on the totem pole. You don't commit to something and then break it off, not in that way of course. It's a lack of tact and social grace.

 

It's okay she's moved out and doing her own thing. We talk every now and then she was probably the only girl I ever thought I could settle down with.

Yeah no one just wants to work on their marriage or relationship anymore that's a waste of time in some people's eyes. The waste would be the years you invest in something only to throw it away. Cut your losses once you know the other person just won't change or you feel you both don't have it in you to make it work.

 

***UPDATES***

I got with a 36 year old mother of four I met at the library. She didn't look a day over 25 was 5'6 and a size 2. Looking at her body I had no idea she even had any kids other then the fact there was an 11 month old in her arms lol. She got down like a champ and she also drives a Jeep Grand Cherokee SRT8. No ring on her finger either. The one thing that messed me up was she told me her oldest is a senior in High School lol that's not that far from my age. Once that shock went through me I was fine.

Okay I preach this to my friends and some of you even said this as well DO NOT SHIT WHERE YOU SLEEP, but do as I say, not as I do............

I hooked up with a girl from work. She's going through a divorce so I asked her out. We had drinks and some sushi. She wanted to come back to my apartment so I went in for the kill and scored. 5'1 and a size 0, I felt like my fat ass was going to break her. My little head got the best of me. She talked a lot, before sex, during sex, after sex.

It'll be awkward around the watering hole for her. I'll be fine I just hope she doesn't go blabbering off or suddenly decides to take back her ex and have to be honest with him saying she fucked a guy from work. I told her we can't say anything to anyone in that office at all or her damn ex husband. Oh yeah, she's also a stage 5 clinger, static cling to the max. I drove her home around 2:30am, that drive back I got 5 text messages from her. Two this morning as well.

UGH I set myself up for this one....

Cliffs: Finally got laid. Two women in one week one seems like a freak with 4 kids who it would be nice to have a casual relationship with, the other is a klingon from work with emotional problems who needs to finalize a divorce.

 

Oh yeah jimmy was my wingman for both women so I was covered.

 

klingon

 

1st woman - Older women (most times) have a greater understanding of "it is what it is". So this should go smooth. Me personally, I would smash this until it got serious. And it will because she has four kids, which means at some point in time, she has to have something more meanigful than a good fuck. My guess is she is trying to let you know she still "has it" right now. But once she feels she has YOU, tables will turn to a more serious note...be advised...

2nd woman - Pussy is pussy, Klingon or not. Since this is not an emotional fuck, you need not be concerned with her vices as long as they don't affect you personally. If you always assert your dominance or control of what's happening with this one, you should be fine. By that I mean lead her, don't be led by her. Don't respond to all of those text messages or phone calls. Don't get caught up in her feelings web. Let her know where you are in this. But no need to be cold, just firm. Make sure it always "is what it is"...

Good work Ira...real nice work...you bounced back strong from that last relationship. I told you this would do wonders for you. Some fucking will always be good for ya! Fuck these hoes. Now - make love to your lady...but fuck these hoes! I'm surprised at how many dudes on here don't understand that. Discern and appreciate the difference and you will be just fine!

 

Just read the PM...ditch the Klingon!

 

So I have been working with the klingon. It hasn't be awkward for me at all. There are a few of us in our mid-early twenties and she decides to tell one of our co-workers inklings of what happened. I guess this is her new BFF lol.

Little does she know the person she is confiding in is close to me as well and just relays what is being said. The klingon is observant of my behavior around female co-workers and vice versa. As a result she is now commenting on it to her confidant. "OMG I can't believe she is all over him, doesn't she have boyfriend, jeez she has the hots for him, etc, etc."

She is lonely, possibly vulnerable atleast that's what I think. I don't want to be a dick to her because I think she could flip.

My text message ratio is at 1 response for every 4 texts so while I am not completely ignoring her it has been a limited engagement and we're sitting at about a 1:3 on calls. I just know if the roles were reversed and I was doing this to some girl I'd probably be fired if someone told a supervisor. I don't want that for her so I just leave it. The obsession continues....

 

Ain't nothing wrong with a broad having the hots for ya! I expect that type of behaviour. Just don't do anything to perpetuate it, or she will turn into the Klingon from hell! You will never get rid of her!

One good bonus of having a woman that will do anything for you is...well...having a woman that will do anything for you. So let her!

 

I feel you Ray. Trust me, I really do. I just want to go to Israel single for obvious reasons. That's this July. Plus she needs to finalize this divorce and work on her emotional stability then I'll give her a shot after July.

 

Set her up with one of your friends that you don't like


Maybe you just need to sit down and explain everything to her...ya know, let her down easy. Are you still banging her or trying to bang her?

 

No, hitting that was a mistake from the get-go. I hit it and quit it. Now she won't leave it. I guess she's addicted to what the dick did.

Setting her up with a friend would be a mistake beyond proportions. Unless he's a nut who's down for the craziness I would dissolve a friendship by putting him through that. Right now it's okay. I'll live.

 

Okay it looks as if I need another update.

The divorcee from the office still calls every once in a while, but she's tone it down quite a bit. I hit it a few times and that's that. We haven't gone out or have done anything to eachother in probably 3 weeks. Ahem, fortunately for me (which turns into an unfortunate situation I'll explain later) and unfortunately for her she has a really cute friend who's Mexican and Japanese.

I took her friend out and we did what grown folks do. I ran into a complication, the condom bust. I used one my buddy gave me from when he wanted me to wingman on those two old broads. I bet you that damn condom was just sitting on his dash baking or in his wallet after he sat on it all day before he gave it to me that one night. So yeah, I used it, it bust, I spent $40 on the morning after pill kit called "Plan B" hahahaha. I don't think anything will develop any further from that.

Moving forward, since I've been going out with my friends I've been frequenting their bar. I talked to this bartender and got her number. I called her once and text her, but she seems to be caught into her own thing to respond? Oh well. It's a shame, but we'll see what happens. She's wholesome and reminds me of Charlotte York from Sex and the City. Now here's the last one to add:

My friend was playing Yenta and decided to do some Fiddler on the Roof matchmaker stuff. She set me up with a friend of her's after she was looking at my Myspace. Her friend thought I was cute and was interested. So now we've been talking and hanging out. Her dad is Iranian and her mother is El Salvadorian/Cuban. Interesting mix especially considering her dad is Muslim and I'm a Jew. So we make some really politically incorrect jokes towards each other lol.

She's BEAUTIFUL her complexion, her eyes, I don't want to say exotic but very unique. Her nose is pierced and the side of her lip. It's WOW and unconventional. Gorgeous features. I LOVE her look. She speaks three languages, she's only 21 though and I mean just turned 21 the last day of April I believe. (I'll be 25 in October) I'm intrigued. We seem to have similar personalities, but you can tell where we are in life is two different places. I am extremely willing to try to make this work.

I'm cooking her dinner tomorrow evening. The last time we hung out on Wednesday night she wanted to stay over and chit chat. It's a very interesting situation considering difference in religion, culture, age. I wasn't looking to get too serious with anyone especially since I am going to Israel in July, but that's just what happens.

As far as myself goes I am now 25lbs below my heaviest. I feel excellent; brimming with confidence and optimism.

Cliffs: after a few tragedies and scares I came across someone who I'd probably never actively pursue and willing to take the steps to see if it works out....

 

u make me want to be single again....


damn...

 

While it sounds like fun, keep in mind that all of these things he is doing are so that he will eventually not be single.

 

 

LoL they'll come up if we get more serious; I'll be happy to post 'em.

 

 

Hmm...

I know a few 21-yr olds. Not intimately. But unless you found one that is "out there and involved", what can you really have to talk about on the same level? Are your goals the same at this point, as well as your avenue of approach on how to reach them? What does she care about, Myspace?

Women can be emotional rollercoaters. At 21, just really (if) getting out from underneath high school social issues, that is exaggerated, and this may be more than you are willing to bite off to fill a role/space in your life.

If you are brimming with confidence, then enjoy the "tasty snack" for a minute and go get you a meal that's more "filling" for the stretch.

 

 

pics up and no love for it....... mmmhmmm I see how it is fellas...

 

Nice I had a friend who was half Lebanese and half Cuban. Your chickie reminds me of her, exotic.

 

nice did you blow a wad on her face?

 

Glad things are going good Hapa. And +rep for the pic!

 

 

Not yet..... but when it happens I'll let you know.

 

out of curiosity...how do you feel about the breakup and the Ex? what are your feelings....i broke up with my ex of 3 years a lil over a month ago, she left me with no choice....was just wondering when things really start to get easier.....

 

Hmm...Losing a good woman, especially one that was your first...is like chasing that first high. You are always trying to get back there. Always trying to replace that in your life.

Me personally, I'm not tryng to replace it. I'm looking to "have" it for the first time. I chose wrong as far as the women in my life early on. I would certainly not count them amongst the gems. I guess I didn't take everything into account that I should have. Which explains why I am such an advocate of waiting and covering all bases before you do.

But I've been drinking milk since then. So I feel strong about getting it right this time. We'll see. Hopefully, it will be my first relationship post on AZ!

 

I love her to death, but as everyday continues on it fades and fades. I care for her deeply and would not want any harm imposed on her. She's not a bad woman by any means.

Time heals all wounds and when I really started getting over her was when I was going out with the fellas and just having a good time. That came a few months or so after the break up when I began to let it all go. I'm not 100% but I'm way over the idea of getting back with her and thinking she is the only one for me.

The attention and sex with multiple women is great (for the most part, minus klingons and busted condoms, but that's single life), nothing can replace your friends though. It is good seeing them again, being around them without any preconditions or curfews or guilt.

I love being single now. Yes this Persian girl has me stuck on stupid, but I'm fascinated with her and want to get to know her. I love the idea not her, not yet at least... If she told me no it's not going to work there is nothing you can do, I literally would accept it and move on. There's no hard feelings. I'm young, she's young, plenty of time to find "the one." In the meantime I'll warm her up to the idea of getting a wad blown in her face just for you!

Live your life for yourself and you'll begin to realize living without her ain't so bad. Good luck buddy. What happened between you and your ex?

 

Ya, ive been with my friends as much as possible and it makes a diff. She cheated (with her ex) , and supposdly other dudes (during a "break")during the course of our relationship. I had no choice. We spent every minute with each other, so while she didnt cheat frequently, one time is enough. I gave this girl my everything...everything i could have possibly given. Shes young,18/19, no excuses though.

Shes been calling/texting/emails crying to me about how shes changed, how she made mistakes but how much it made her realize how important and good i really am. How she does not regret any of it b/c of the learning expierence shes gone through, but regardless....i just wont ever be able to trust her.

I want to take her back, i really do, but it's pointless. I've never had a problem getting girls, and i'm a great guy. I never deserved it. Everyone makes mistakes, i forgave her once early in the relationship, i made mistakes and was forgiven (never cheated, came close, but im not the person that can do that i learned).....either way it's really really hard. I think about her 24/7....and weve had some on and off contact , slept together at some point which prob was not smart....it's just really difficult. She was the first girl i was in love with.

Either way, i dont want to be with someone i will always doubt, always distrust. I want to be able to go to work and not worry about the past, regardless of what she says. Shes lied before, lied to my face, lied how she would never lie, and then lied again. Right now i feel like i dont want any other girl, and that ill never find someone i can be happy with again , but i guess thats normal....sorry to thread jack.

 

Eh you'll find someone. Sounds to me that you're better off without her. She still has that teenager mindset and if you truly are a good guy then she doesn't deserve you. She needs to grow up and you need to grow out of her.

There will be a girl out there who appreciates all you bring to the table, who will forgive you for your faults and someone you feel is meant for you and you can be happy with. It may take some compromise on both parts, but it'll be worth it if it works out.

Take some time off and enjoy being single. Don't even think about drama with women. There's no time for it. Seriously "youth is wasted on the young." Shaw was very right about that. We're too stuck on broads; I want to live my life without regret and move forward to eventually be a loving husband and devoted father. For now and the next couple of years, it's about me. Whoever comes along for the ride may be the one to tie me down. Work hard, play harder.

 

Good post. It's hard to forget and replace that first love, but it's possible to move on and still be happy

 

can i join the just got outta a 3 yr relationship club? haha

i think the moral of the story is life goes on time heals most things and so does gettin random play, and when all is said and done the right one usually comes along.

 

It was a good read, way to get back on it, OP

 

Thanks it's been a real journey to get back on that saddle after so many years. But it had to be done. I'm a stronger man because of everything. Ray is usually right about so many things it's hard to believe he's never had a first love.

One thing I have co-signed on with what he said is that this 21yo I'm seeing is way too young for me. She turned off her phone so she didn't want to make it to work, she forgot to pay her cell phone bill even though she works for AT&T so her phone was shut off for a day, things like that are all red flags. I'm going to enjoy this "tasty snack," until a more "filling" meal enters my life. Who knows? I could be the one to change her and instill some responsibility in her....

The question I find myself asking lately is the juice worth the squeeze?

 

Only if you need a quick "taste"...

 

 

Yea, thats what everyone keeps telling me, and i'm trying to tell myself...it's just very difficult. I really do want to believe that shes changed, but even if she has, is it worth the doubt and distrust for the years to come? Why settle for that , when i can find a girl who i've never had any bad blood with...one that would never dis-respect me like that.

 

nope

you just answered your own question.

we need to have an AZ vegas meet, take a few us on a VIP package at Sapphire.

 

and my final answer is.....
























NO!