RiceBurner

Oh victory is sweet. Here's the setup. Slight mist in the air this evening, the open road shimmering in the moonlight, a red light. I ease right up next to this gold BMW 530i. As I pull up, our eyes meet and his window lowers. From the depths of the car appears this bespectacled Bruce Lee wannabee who shouts: "I got stick baby!" As I ponder his insolent and generally infantile reference to his manual transmission, I slowly take off traction control, gate shift into first and gingerly put my left foot on the brake and right foot onto the gas. I hear the gunning of the BMer's engine and suddenly I was bathed in the GREEN of GO!.....

[FAST-FORWARD ONE QUARTER MILE DOWN THE ROAD]

Into my sideview mirror I peer, oh who can it be? Yes, it is a gold BMW 530i one whole carlength behindst me. (Rhyming added for emphasis)

As I sit in front of my computer this evening, while reaching behind myself intermittently to self-adminster repeated pats on my back, I can't help but feel sorry for that poor old bloke who front and center willingly ordered up a big slice of Japanese humble pie and then bit off much more than he could swallow.

Edr0e

Into my sideview mirror I peer, oh who can it be? Yes, it is a gold BMW 530i one whole carlength behindst me. (Rhyming added for emphasis)


lol! Nice kill. Make sure you dont roll up to a 540i. They are pretty damn fast, same chassis...

Dont you hate it when those bimmers are debadged! ErrR

BlackShadow

Good kill!

RUF87

Nice kill story.

The mans a poet and didn't know it. :p

BTW - I think a stong running TLS will take a auto 540.

Ruf

Allout

Reminds me of the scene out of "The Fast and Furious" - Supra and Ferrari.

Nice Kill. He's probably telling his budies he got beat by this car sprayin 100 shot.

Eternal TL2k3

btw... were u running a Type S or P?

the 530i is a good comparison against the TL cuz of the weight and size similarities... plus , same power output. but a stick 530i wont beat a SS Type S... itll be close with the TL-P but Type S will blow it away

Darkshear

iTrader: (1)

I have a '99 TL, i can take a 530, barley. not a 330 sport though, 3 series is lighter.

As for 540, thats what my buddie had before his M5, and trust me, it will take a Type-S, even with I/H/E, i know from expierence. I kept up with him real good though ehehehehhehe bastard!!

Best way to tell a 540 from a 530, even if its debagged, is the wheels. the 540 and 540 sport have had different unique BMW wheels since its E39 creation in '97. BUT if they swapped the wheels with aftermarket, your screwed gotta love the 5 series.

daimler560

Keep in mind that the 530 is a very small block V8, and the 330 is the tradtional inline 6. My neighbor has a 530, a good clip faster then my mom's 525 of the same generation...let's back up though--what generation 530?
The current 530 is the inline 6... More info before I get mixed up further!

Darkshear

iTrader: (1)

Yah E39 530 is a stright 6.

Old 530 was a V8?

r10apple

Um, maybe it's just mine, but my '02 TL-S w. i/h and no exhaust will ruin a 540i's day--auto or not...I know from experience...
...
Speaking of that, anyone see the commercial playing during bball last night with the new Lincoln LS v8 claiming it will "outhandle", "outcorner" and "outdrive" the new BMW 540i? Maybe outrun wasn't thought of...or outlast...It won't outprice so maybe they should have included that claim...

ferizzo

No way and LS Vanything will beat a 540!

I love the look or a 540! TLS is a pretty good match with a 540 from a stop but not as good at higher speeds. TLS should beat the 530/528 stick or auto. I beat my friend's 528 pretty badly from a stop three times but on the highway it was alot closer.

The 5-series is still an awesome looking car though!

Darkshear

iTrader: (1)

It tottaly depends on a few variables. For instance, the 540i vs. the 540i with sport, the sport has a tuned throttle, VANOS, and transmission software. But the VANOS is the big difference. That and the suspension. The 540 weighs i think about 3800 pounds, so its a little heavier. But its got 290HP and 324 torque.

a TL-S with I/H/E will loose a race with a 540 sport, auto or not, but it will be right there with it the whole time... till about 80 or 90 mph then he will pull on you.

But a TL-S will take a standard 540i, no problem.

I saw that commerical and pissed myself. Anyone here ever drive an LS?? the thing rides like a Contour. Even the V8 leaves something to be desired in performance. i guess if you pop the 540's tires the LS would win

daimler560

Yeah, the very first 530 was a super-small block V-8. (they're in the 89-96 generation, the 530 being produced from 93 to 95-96) I heard somewhere that Lincoln hopped up the V8 in some models and it's a bit faster--not sure by how much though.

vsop TL-S

Well I got a buddy of mine that has a BMW 323 w/ M3 front end...I.E. he got the M3 fenders and front bumper. He also has the old M3 wheels and a drop on it. He runs his mouth off about his car all freaking day...Kinda getting sick of it. The fool thinks he can take me in a race and that his car can dust me. I'll give him the fact that he has a standard, but in hell no way can that car take me...I've sat inside it and it doesn't pull half as hard as my TL-S. He actually got ****ed by my brother's Accord V6 and I don't know where he gets the idea he can take me when I beat my bro's car all the time like a bad habit.

Well...In short, the loud mouth thinks he can take me. He said that he didn't step on it when he raced my bro. And he thinks he the **** in that car...Props to him for th looks because the car does look sweet...But this boy is perpretrating a FAKE M3. He has the emblems and everything and from the front it looks like the M3 minus the H.I.D. headlights, which gives it away as a fake one. He tells girls it's a "real" M3 and what not, but I'm not one to cockblock, but the fools talks trash to those girls sayin **** like,"you want to race my "M3" , fool?" Ok you guys get the picture...I would like some feedback on his chances against me in a race, I know I'm going to beat him because I'm that damn good of a driver but this fool...I don't want to beat..I want to humiliate, teach a lesson, and stomp into the ground...in a race of course.

r10apple

vsop---First, take a valium! Jeez, man! You're gonna blow a gasket before you even get started!
And yes, no brainer for a Type-S victory...

As far as that Lincoln is concerned, I was watching this ad and couldn't quite figure out what they were talking about and bet it might be better on a skid pad or slalom course of something, but you still can't tell me that big blue sled is better or more enticing than the 540i or is overall a better driver's car...Can't do it...

vsop TL-S

No worries...Man, It is that I work with this guy and he is a good friend of mine...he changed a lot since making some more money and lets his money go to his head...I mean this guys sits there and runs his mouth off all the time...blah, blah, blah, ok I think it is time for me to go take a nap...hahahahah alright then I'm out this piece...later...

aquilles10

323 will be BLOWN out of the water by a Type-S! Not even close. A 323 has 181 horspower! I've driven one, they ar nice, but God bless him if he thinks he can take on a Type-S...

Not one to encourage racing but, if you do it. Do it for pink slips.

;-)

SergeyM

Auto TL/CLS cannot beat 540ia sport or non-sport. Manual CL-S is about equal, manual CL-S with typical mods can be a bit faster that 540ia. 540/6 is a different animal though. We are talking 5.4-5.5 sec 0-60 mph here. And as long as an auto hits its 4th gear it is all over for the Acura in any case.

BDI

werd!!!!!!

Ray_Khan

An SVT contour isn't a bad ride....great tranny, good power adn handles very well too. not much for luxory or asthetics tho.

ferizzo

Shut up!!! Would you buy one?

Ray_Khan

probably not...but it's not bad for the $$$.

kgoessling

A TLS beating a 540; I want what you are smoking!

SCWells72

Yeah, the comment that a 540i-6M is toast to a stock TL-S made me laugh as well. Someone said on the FreshAlloy G35 forum (paraphrased), "Just because it's the fastest car YOU'VE ever driven doesn't make it the fastest car on the road." I think there's a little of that going around here...

As I always say, TL-S is a great car for the money, but it's not the end all, be all of (pseudo-)sport sedans.

Speaking of which, from a sport perspective a Lincoln LS V8 is a heck of a ride (though it's not worth the money Lincoln's asking these days). And I'm not talking 0-60 here (which seems to predominate performance discussions on this forum). I'm talking about EXTREMELY neutral handling from a brilliant chassis and perfect 50/50 weight distribution. Go test drive one through some serious twisties and you'll see what I mean. Also, even though the previous V8 was nothing to write home about, the '03 V8 finally got variable valve timing and is actually a pretty nice engine in its own right. It's not a straight-line 0-60 monster by any means, but it does pull exceptionally well from highway driving speeds up through triple digits.

lilboykorea

contour Svts are cool lookin rides...
i agree that few of us on this board can get pretty cocky about our tls...

acuraguynj

My only question is this, what is a "BRUCE LEE WANNABEE"?

Are you saying it was an Asian guy in a BMW?

That's wrong either way, no matter if you're Asian also too.

Your screen name seems contradictory too. You burn yourself, cause you're driving a riceburner too?

nym31mp

nice kill BMW- has really understocked the 525 and the 530 I's the put there all in the 540 plus the fact the the 525 and 530 quality has gone down my mother had a 98 528I and now she has a 525 and 530 I and the 525 especially the car cant get out of its own way....but good kill CHALK ONE UP FOR THE HOME TEAM

RiceBurner

Dear Acuraguynj:

I am not sure if you work for the American Civil Liberties Union, but you may want to find out all the FACTS before you impose your beliefs upon others. To educate you, the guy in the BMW is actually a co-worker of mine who happens to purport to be a karate master and actually does go around the office exhibiting his karate moves. Although it was obviously not clear to you, but my original post was meant to be lighthearted and humorous and your attempt to ignite a discussion related to RACE is inappropriate and unwarranted.

juniorbean

iTrader: (5)

The fact of the matter here is that you were the one who posted "bespectacled Bruce Lee wannabee" in your initial post. If you knew the guy, you should have said so. There are many owners on this forum that are of Asian decent... so it's obvious that what you wrote could affend them. I'm actually surprised that it took the bottom of page two for someone to say something.

I'm not sure how long you've lurked on the board, but going off of your post count, you're new here. All of the boards related to the Acura community (acura-tl.com, acura-cl.com, and acura-tsx.com) are very sensative when it comes to racist remarks. While your Bruce Lee comment was obviously an attempt a humor rather then a race comment, that has only become clear from your last post when you reveal the sort of inside joke you were referring to. In the future, please be careful how you word things. On the internet, we can't tell if you're joking or not, or if you know the guy or not... it's just words on a screen.

That said, let's please keep this topic on track so it can stay open. Thanks!!

acuraguynj

How can it be clear to me when you explain only now (after I mentioned this issue) that it was your friend? Your explanation sounds like your covering you ass on this one and also sounds even worse then any excuse.

Believe me I am one of the last people that will jump all over you and cry racism (I usually let it slide, which is probably not a good thing), however it's when I read your post, and it was so obvious what you said, that I had to say something. No one is saying you're a racist, maybe oblivoius and I'm sure you are going to tell me you have Asian friends and heck maybe you're even Asian, but what makes this all the more worse is your follow up excuse.

RiceBurner

Sorry folks, but what started out as a lively and spirited discussion on a BMW kill has quickly denegrated thanks to a certain someone who in their first post labelled me a racist and and now in their second post calls me a liar.

Funny though how the person who said that quote "I am one of the last people that will jump all over you and cry racism" was the FIRST person on this board to bring up the race issue. That to me truly sounds like someone covering their ass.

Again, let's try and stick to the subject rather than calling people racists and liars and speculating on the ethnic origin of people on this board (as said aforementioned person has done in the previous post).

All the above still does not change the fact that the Type S is faster than the 530.

juniorbean

iTrader: (5)

If you guys want to keep going back and forth... take it to email or PM so we can leave this topic open.

Thanks

stiletto

BMW 530 is a bad purchase decision. Better lease one, 'cause you can get tired of the lack of performance that ULTIMATE DRIVING MACHINE has.... BTW, are all series and models BMW ultimate driving machines or is that only the 318Ti???

r10apple

Nah, I think only the M5 or Z8 (maybe the Z8 but ultimate means menage-- {to me} and I couldn't put two in there with me!)...

1SICKLEX

Sad, so sad.

neojin

Like you said, its "ultimate DRIVING machine", not "ultimate off the line acceleration machine." "Driving" involves a bunch of things line acceleration, braking, handling, steering response, etc.

People talk about how BMW is just a great marketing company with crappy cars because they don't have enough hp or torque. Well, look at those same people who are just as equally brainwashed into thinking hp and torque are the only things that matter about a car. Who's the real marketing genius? hmm....

Personally, I don't see what is so fun about pressing the gas and going in a straight line, especially if its automatic. There is no skill involved, its machine vs machine. But for some of you, its ego vs ego.

I sense :flamer: coming my way.

neojin

SCWells72

Totally agreed (and it's VERY rarely I'll say that to 1SICK!). Say what you will about BMW's (lack of) reliability, (subjective) less attractive interiors, (lower) bang-for-the-buck ratio, etc., but there's a reason that people who drive cars for a living invariably praise the BMW line of automobiles as THE true driver's cars.

Just because a 330i/530/Z4/whatever doesn't accelerate to 60 or 1/4 mile as quickly as some straight-line acceleration-tuned car doesn't mean that it's a "bad purchase decision." There's so much more to entertaining driving than that!

Try driving a stock sport-tuned BMW--coupe, sedan, roadster, whatever--back-to-back with a stock TL-S or CL-S in enthusiast driving conditions like REALLY curvy roads at SCARY high speeds (70+mph) and see which feels the most encouraging (and least frightening!).

I've had a TL in the past, and it was a nice car. I've driven the hell of the CL-S and the TL-S. I have both a GS430 L-Tuned and a Z3 2.8 now. The CL-S, TL-S, and GS430 don't touch the responsiveness and overall "fun-to-drive" factor of the Z3 (or the 330 loaners I get during servicing), and not just because the Z3 can be driven with the top down. When automotive journalists use terms like "telepathic steering" and "sensual handling," it's because they can't find a more applicable term to use based on real-world experience!

1SICKLEX

Hit the nail on the head.

Recently, it seems many a carmaker has abondened making a solid car in all areas and rather, concentrate on it's acceleration, get Car and Driver to say "this car did 0-60 in blah blah blah", the automaker then makes a big deal about it and makes it the main advertising slogan. Sad really. It's such a small minded, idiotic approach. It's in cars from the new Nissan Altima, to the $750,000 Bugatti Veyron. Concentrate on speed and acceleration and that it all.

As you can see in BMWs case, that is not the example. BMWs have really never been the fastest cars in their segment save the M cars. But in driving them, they do make you feel so much more involved, and stock, they are very confident in taking an expressway ramp at 80mph without braking. They use real wood, and 14 way power seats. They are also no bargain price wise to you. But to me, you pay what you get for and 9/10 they are worth the extra dough. For example, to get my car to handle as well/better than a 540 cost some dough to upgrade the suspension. Saying a 530 is a dumb purchase is saying a Tl-P is a dumb purchase.

Ray_Khan

these last couple of posts were great. I agree with 1SICKLEX and SCWells72.

acuraguynj

By the way that person would be me, Acuraguynj, so no need to tip toe around and say that so called person or that certain someone, I'm right here! I haven't even called you a racist at any point, however after reading your responses, I officially can now call you an indiot.

And to stick to the topic, the 530i sport is a sweeter car than an Acura TL Type S. Sure the TL Type S has more HP, but there is something about German HP that is different than Japanese HP. German HP is quicker and feels more powerful (even if the 530 only has 225HP).