Not this office...In fact, we hardly even talk with each other during the day.

 

haha, sorry, it was suppose to be a joke. I meant "eating" as getting to third base...

 

You need to tell us everything. Don't hold back.

 

I personally wouldn't do it. Suck it up as "yeah, I still got it" and call it a day.

 

I used to love the company ink!! I may have missed this, but is this girl single? And does she know you are not?

 

Man, Aziners are way too rational.

 

Do you actually think someone here will tell you to go for it? I'm sure some idiot will come along but 98% of us will tell you to stay away.

Unless you can provide more details.

Irony: joerocket calling Darksom a douche as he contemplates cheating on his wife.

 

Yes.

I think the ring would give that one away...

 

No, of course I didnt expect that. I expected to be talked out of it...Which is what's happening...

Sure, I'm not going to argue that, but thanks for pointing out the obvious.

 

NP

But you're not completely talked out of it are you?

Thank god there aren't any good looking women at my office.

 

 

I don't know, we're going "out" next Thursday for a few...I still plan on it...after that? Who knows...

 

My experience with this type of situation has brought me to the conclusion that leaving things just to disperse into nothingness sometimes creates uncomfortable situations within an office setting... No matter how mature one is or becomes, those uncomfortable situations will and can happen...

If you were to go out with her, would bringing your wife be an option???

If i were to go out drinking with some people from the office, and I didn't have anything to hide from my S.O. (Like things your co-workers would know that your S.O. shouldn't) I would bring my girl along to enjoy herself with me and my co-workers... Especially being female co-workers

But I've had that talk with my S.O. already and I got positive feedback... Consider it as an option... unless there's a reason not to...

 

What's done is done. How you proceed from here on out matters. If there is something that disfunctional/wrong with your current marriage that's causing you to fill that need elsewhere, address the issue. Don't cover up the real issue with this maybe/maybe not dance you're playing with this girl. If you continue your wife is only going to be a casualty no matter how this plays out. And you don't have to sleep with this girl to hurt your wife. Flirting would do enough damage to some women.

The truth always finds a way into the light. Nothing you do will be hidden from your wife forever. All it takes is one of her friends to see you "out" one night.

You're a grown-up and can make grown-up decisions. You are also playing in an area that has grown-up consequences. The decison is yours, but please think this through.

 

you say you love your wife and do not wish to hurt her; yet, you still keep your plans and entertain the idea of "dessert" (assumption purely based on your "after that?")
You must have some strong reasons to do as you intend on proceeding then. Personally, no matter what those reasons are, i wouldnt be able to risk it, but then again, I am not in your shoes and do not know what you are going thru.

Sooooo, let me put this from a stand point from an immature ass who cares nothing more than about the goodies below...

She is 10 years your elder, You wife is your age. This bitch at your company (yea, shes a bitch, she sees the ring, yet pursues you) has probably been around the block and done this to others as well. She has the looks as you say, so shes definitely realed em in. But i bet you're a football going down a 8 lane highway once you get up inside those panties. Matter of fact, its probably nasty and puke green from all the abuse. Not to mention its just going to get saggier and nastier day by day.

She is 40+, not everything can be conditioned with oil of olay.

Back to maturity...
Try to take a step back away from your situation and look at it from third person. Look at the entire timeline that is called your life with your life. What caused you to enter down the path you are in now? (you dont have to tell us, just tell yourself) Is it worth it? Is the furture ramifications of your current actions worth it? Whats to say company Bitch doesnt Fatal Attraction your ass? What happened to all the good times with your wife. Im sure you have many many memories of all the good. Is it worth being burned away into oblivion cuz of some 40+ twunt?

Sooooooo, im not gonna pussy foot around but I do apologize in advance for being blunt.......Dont do it dude. cancel your plans, and work out wat you got at home (if it is possible..). Im a believer in everything has a solution, and escape is never one of them....

Best of luck to ya dude!

 

 

You would be surprised what power a ring has with other women.

 

See? A perfect response without being a pretentious asshole

Fantastic advice, though I think its taken a bit to the extreme. I've gone out to have drinks/dinner with other girl friends in the past with my wife knowing about it. Difference here is that she has met and know's these people somewhat. She dosent have a problem with it.

And isnt it somewhat difficult to make friends without doing things with them and talking with them? Sure, this started out as somewhat of an attraction, but no one can sit there and tell me with a straight face that they made friends with a woman because they were butt fucking ugly and had a GREAT personality.

You guys are basically saying I can't have a woman friend that I'm attracted to just because I'm married. Which is fucking redonkulous. And I already told you guys she already knows I good friends with this other woman at work. My wife and I joke about things all the time about her...Its not a big deal...If it was, she would tell me. Communication isnt an issue. We talk like BFF's would...

 

I thought it was a sign of "Hands off!"....man, I have a lot to learn.....

 

Absolutely...And in many different ways...Women are much more comfortable talking to a married guy, especially other married women.

 

You are definitely so in there... 3some???

 

 

 

Believe what you want. I don't have a reason to lie about that one...

 

The eyebrow raise was for the word mature. If by "do these things" you mean flirt and go out for drinks, then pretend nothing happened at the office... that's not mature in my book.

Look man... I'm not judging you personally. You have your reasons... your business. Just a pet peeve of mine with some of my (immature) friends. The guys I respect most are the ones that stick by their families and respect their wife by not putting themselves in those situations. Yeah, it sucks sometimes when you have to play the "what if" game, but I see it as weak and selfish to give in...

 

I think we all knows. Four pages of discussion should be enough for you to erect a wall. Have the talk, have the drinks, maybe a peck on the cheek goodbye, but if you're a man who doesn't go for it on 4th down every time he gets the ball (LT ain't that good), use this to actually get closer to your wife.

Even Pull-T would punt this one.

 

Ok...Then its "smart"


I don't consider myself a weak person. And "not putting themselves in those situations" sounds extremely boring to me. I'm not going to not talk to a woman just because I'm married. Completely absurd. And, hey if their wives have a problem with it, then its their fault for marrying that type of woman. In the 8 years I've know her, my wife has never been a jealous person.

 

Football analogies FTW

 

I never said you shouldn't talk to them. I hang out with office chicks at happy hours all the time, but other people are there and they all know I'm not "looking to hook up"? How? You know the game... If someone is interested, she'll send out a signal. Often, they will ask you about your wife. If you say, "don't ask" or quickly change the subject, she knows flirting with you might go somewhere. On the other hand, if you actually talk about your wife and family, they'll move on. If they get touchy, and you don't touch back, they'll move on. No, it may not be as exciting as chilling and talking in a group, but it just seems right to me.

 

That didn't come out right... I meant, "chilling or talking in a group might not be as exciting, but it just seems right."

 

How about picking one:

A) You fully intend to do something physical with her and cheat on your wife
B) You're making a new friend with no intent what so ever to let it go past that

You keep implying one or the other, depending on the advice you're replying to.

 

I can... usually we talk for a while and it's followed by a hot session of shopping.

No... that's completely different. Your wife is ok with the other lady at work because she has met her; and i'm guessing your first conversation with this other lady at work wasn't about alcohol, partying, and hooking up. If you cannot tell the difference between the two.. I dunno.. that's just stupid. You CAN have a woman FRIEND that you find ATTRACTIVE, but you CANNOT have a woman fuck buddy that you are attracted to.. that's not a friend at that point.

Don't skew the wording that EVERYONE is saying.. No one is saying you cannot have a friend; but right off the bat you're in this deeper than a friendship - you're ready to hook up with her, not be her friend.

 

Dont forget to stop by the makeup counter and also to pick up a few brown bags...

 

 

I will restrict my posting to topic, but because of the very reason you suggested is why I won't stop posting. I am definitely not going to establish that precedent, nor should you ask me to. This is a good topic, and my thoughts are not restricted to Joe. They never are just for the OP when I post in a thread. It's for anyone reading, who my advice applies to. Joe may be misinterpreting what I am saying and lashing out, but he isn't bothering me. If he goes off-topic, that's your concern not mine. (Do not mistake any of that to be nasty, I'm just being frank.)

True Story:

A woman that works with me was dating a guy at the job, while she was living with someone else. They started off with casual stuff. Then he hit it in the back of a truck on the lot. things took off from there. She would spend nights at the work guy's house. He bought her gifts, and spent money on her. He even kicked his girlfriend to the curb.

Recently, the guy on the job lost his job, and the woman kicked him to the curb. Told him it was because the dude at home proposed and she said yes. Now, I think that's a lie. So does a lot of folks at work. She is just trife like that and he didn't see it coming. But be that as it may, it is what it is. Now he has no girl, and no job.

None of this may happen to Joe, but it is an example of what could happen when you go down that road. So don't do it...Luda's post above reminded me of that, thought it applied...

 

Fair enough. Like I said, just a suggestion.

 

 

I don't have a problem with you when you're not being a pretentious asshole. When you cut out some of the stupid shit you post, you actually give some good advise.

 

How about I already did? I mentioned a while back that I'm not going through with it. But I am going out with her on Thursday regardless. But some of you still have your panties in a bunch about that...

 

Because YOU took it to that level. Had you came in here with a comment like "This woman is flirting with me and wants to go out with me. Problem is, I am married. Should I go". Your "advise" would have been different. This is not the case though. You came in here asking us if we think you could get into her panties.