Racer5M3

Hey all,

I've been dating this girl for the past five months. Overall, things are going well. However, I get this feeling that I am missing out on something. It seems that even when I'm with her or not, I tend to notice girls that are better looking than my current gf. I have thoughts about being with other women.

I dont think it helps matters when my gf has a medical condition that gets in the way of intimacy. Further, she has this issue with bad breath. When I found out about her medical condition, I felt that I had the maturity or strength to deal with it. I'm starting to get the feeling that I don't possess that ability.

I am torn about what to do. She has some tremendous qualities, but her few "negatives" loom large. Should I have a discussion about what I'm feeling, or is it already a lost cause? Should I just pack it in?

I don't want to end the relationship and find out that I regret doing so. Even worse, that I am alone and those women that I seem to lust after are forever elusive and unattainable.

saiko_cl_duck

talk it out with her first.

But honestly, if you're feeling like you want to be with other women, then just suck it up, tell her, break up, and move on. Don't string her along, get misearable 7 months down the road, and then break it off knowing it's what you wanted right now.


fwiw, It really sounds like you want out now anyway.

Whiskers

The boobs are always bigger on the other side.....

AdamNJ

What's the medical condition?

Bad breath and a stinky puss?

'because there are hotter looking girls' shouldn't be your reason for breaking up. If you in general aren't happy, that should be the reason. If everything is fine, but you just want to fuck hotter girls, then that's kinda fucked up.

dom

Words to live by.

And I hate to break it to you but there will ALWYS be hotter girls. The fact that your having these feelings to me sounds like you should pack it in.

BustedJack

I thought it's "The grass is always better trimmed on the other side...."

BustedJack

TypeSGearhead...........

So far the members have given you a few pretty good reasons... I'd like to add one more for you. If thoughts of being with other women because you find your current gf isn't as beautiful, then its a personal issue you need to deal with yourself. You need to ask yourself what's the reason you came into this relationship? Her good qualities vs her imperfections. In addition, no matter who you date, there will always be prettier looking women out there. It's just human nature to think that "the grass is always greener on the other side." It's the quality in her, things she does, the way she carries herself and etc., that makes the difference.
You really need think about how this relationship is going to progress. Do you want to be with her? If the negatives side of her bothers you that much, it's best you break it off now than few years down the road when things get really serious. Keep in mind that nobody is perfect, even the hottest women you find will have tons of imperfections. It is really up to how well you can put up, how much you love them, and how compatible you two are.

My lady has alot of imperfections but so do I.... there are days that I can't stand her, but her good qualities far surpass her imperfections. The fact that she can love me unconditionally and has done things in the past that no can would, it was good enough for me to choose her for the rest of my life.
You just need to fight your own inner demons and decide how you want to go from here.

whynot

Sounds like she's not for you, don't waste her time and yours.

RLToni

I don't think that there is anything wrong with you or that you have anything to work on. The bottom line is that if you are straying even mentally, you are not in love with her. Find someone that makes you not WANT other women.

dom

So wait, are you guys telling me you never had thoughts of being with (sex) other women when you are in love with someone?

Whiskers

Who asked you...

BustedJack

uh oh

London vs Canada Round 2

RLToni

Thoughts? Who doesn't have them? But it sounds like the OP is having more than harmless thoughts....he is actually crossing into wanting someone else not just fantasizing....does that make sense?

dom

Your wife.

dom

I guess thats hard to determine without more info on his part. These thoughts could be as harmless as whiskers dreams about Minnie.

Racer5M3

Some additional info.....

The bad breath has been somewhat of a constant. As for her medical condition, she was infected w/ an STD by some asshole a few years ago. It is a condition that can be managed but not cured. While I have always been safe, I cannot stop thinking that if I get infected, I could not deal psychologically.

Again, she has some tremendous qualities, but when I found out about her condition (she was very upfront w/ me), things seemed to change. I do not think about this girl 24/7, I enjoy my time w/out her just as much as I enjoy my time w/ her. I have this sense that I can take or leave this relationship.

BustedJack

[QUOTE=TypeSGearhead]Some additional info.....

The bad breath has been somewhat of a constant. As for her medical condition, she was infected w/ an STD by some asshole a few years ago. It is a condition that can be managed but not cured. While I have always been safe, I cannot stop thinking that if I get infected, I could not deal psychologically.

Again, she has some tremendous qualities, but when I found out about her condition (she was very upfront w/ me), things seemed to change. I do not think about this girl 24/7, I enjoy my time w/out her just as much as I enjoy my time w/ her. I have this sense that I can take or leave this relationship.[/QUOTE]


sounds like to me you should really call it quits..... the STD I believe is Herpes... a condition that can be managed but not cured... but then again I'm not a medical specialist.

amisconception

Oh snap.

sasha

I think you already know deep down inside where this relationship is going. I believe that if you have that inexplainable feeling and commitment to do anything just to be with a person you love, a few "negatives" would not matter.

RMATIC09

It seems like you have no interest. I mean, if you were in love with this girl, you would be able to look past everything your complaining about. I would cut it loose before you go deeper.

RLToni

LatinSmoke 01CL

There is way to much doubt in your mind at this point. It seems that you have so many reasons to not be with her and that will always be in your mind by the looks of it. Its time to move on.

doopstr

Have you told her that she has bad breath?

Sounds to me like you aren't into her, physically and mentally.

Even when you find your soulmate you will always notice other women. That's life with a penis, you just need to learn to control it.

thatguy

aids PLUS bad breath???? gtfo!

Jared03CLS

^^ ^^

It sounds like you've made your decision and you're waiting for us to validate it. You're clearly not into her as much as you once were. Be honest with her and move on. This will only get worse as time goes by.

michimonster

drop it like its hot

Scottman111

Dumped her yet? Update??

Racer5M3

Hey all,

Quick update. We're still together. She has many good qualities. And more importantly, she's a fun person to be around. I enjoy the pleasure of her company.

However, since I found out about her medical condition (as a previous user mentioned, it is in fact genital herpes), I've been thrown for a loop. I've challenged myself, to see if I can come to grips with the situation. I've always been safe sexually, but there is still that amount of risk. Nothing is foolproof.

Overall, I'm just taking things day-by-day. In the grand scheme of things, six months aint shit. Hell, a year aint shit. While I am sensitive to her feelings, I don't really owe her anything.

BustedJack

you gonna drop it like it's hot

when and where?

BustedJack

Becareful of what you are doing buddy. You are currently not that into her (yet). Like I predicted, it was Genital Herpes and that STD isn't something you can ever get rid of. Are you willing to love her that much to also get G.H.? You should be wise and drop her while you aren't in love yet. That's just my

RMATIC09

ludachrisvt

iTrader: (2)

1 out of 4 adult women have GH

wasupdog

iTrader: (2)

bad breath...wtf?? i think that would bother me more than The HERP Simplex Q. after all, if u get married so u both get the herp, at least u know u aint getting anything else.

crazymjb

Key word is found out. You should not have had to "find out" about her condition.

Mike

NewAgePirate

Dude. No way. Do NOT stay with a chick with the herp. You can find someone you like just as much who is just as good looking to fall in love with who you won't have to get herpes to spend the rest of you life with. No way.

CJ Majesty

Um Id Start sometihing else before I get rid of her. Your gonna break up anyway you've only been with her for 5 months & you've already got a major problem with her. Keep it moving.

CJ Majesty

The Lower case (h) Awe man I should have kept reading thats not a medical condition THATS AN "ES TEE DEE"

BAIL Right now!!

ericajackhannahjamie?

Where did you get that false information?

badazzTL

That is just disgusting. I wonder if the genital herpes have anything to do with her bad breath

Racer5M3

Hey ACIRE,

The stat about GH is true. One in four women have GH. You can only tell if a person has it when they have an outbreak. After that inital outbreak, you can by asymptomatic for a long time. My GF has not had an outbreak in almost a year. Furthermore, she is taking Valtrex, an effective medication that prevents outbreaks and transmission of the virus.


Don't get me wrong: I don't feel like I'm "doing time" just by staying with her. However, I continue to weigh her positive qualities with her negative qualities. Even though she has a small amount of negative qualites, they loom large. In addition, if I were to end things, I'm trying to see how I can come across as less of an asshole, less of a bastard when ended something good.