The zf 9 speed in the 19 is very smooth, much improved over the 16. I am still in break in period so haven't got on it yet but will report back after I get past break in period and can start to accelerate more aggressively

So far the "refinements" mentioned in the 19 press release seem to have addressed most complaints about rough shifting

I guess i will finish this thread off with my own impression of the 6 speed in sh awd. Thr car driving dynamic changes drastically between comfort/normal/sport and that includes the transmission programming. In comfort and normal mode the transmission does not downshift for most throttle inputs. Sport mode is where the transmission comes alive! D vs S mode is another monumental change. Sport D mode the car shifts more immediate to throttle input but still does not shift multiple gears unless WOT. It does take in paddle shifter input but only for ~3 seconds before goong back to Automatix programming. Sport S mode the trans never goes to 6th gear by itself and stays in the higher RPMs almost all the time. It also remains in the gear you select the whole time when you use paddle shifter. When launching from stop, first 2 gears are aggressive and definitely rushes the mdx out of the hole. Im very happy with the 6 speed and nothing to complain about! And i get to have the traditional shifter in my hand! Thanks for all the help on this topic.